Chapter 37: Chapter 37

"Are you okay, son?" I gently asked Erom as we sat on the bed.

We are now here in the condo. I've noticed his silence since we got in the car.

He slowly raised his gaze to me. "I'm okay, Mom. It's just... I'm tired," he answered.

I smiled thriftily then kissed him on the forehead. "Alright, go to bed. I'll just make you some milk so you can sleep easier,"

He just nodded and then followed what I said. I watched my son lie down comfortably before I stood up and left the room.

"Is Erom asleep?" Chaos inquired when I arrived in the kitchen.

He was sitting while drinking coffee.

"Just going to sleep," I replied and went to the sink to make a glass of milk

"Are you okay?"

I was stunned when Chaos asked me that.

Am I okay?

What if I am not? What is the reason?

I sighed and turned to him, I couldn't help but feel guilty the moment I saw his shoulder.

"I'm sorry," I said regretfully and resumed what I was doing. "Because of us you were injured," I added as I turned my back on Chaos.

"It is okay, Jazzie. You are a family to me," he replied.

I just smiled a little and finished mixing the milk. I picked it up and went to next to Chaos, shortly pat his shoulder in gratitude.

"Jazzie ..." he said as I continued to walk.

I stared at him. "Yes?"

He cleared his throat and stood up from his seat. He approached me to make the distance between us much closer and then looked at me faintly.

"About my offer back then...will you..." he stopped for a moment and took a deep breath, "…give me a chance?" he continued.

I couldn't answer or even move. I was completely frozen.

"I won't force you if you don't want to. I respect your decisi—"

"Let's try it out," I cut him off.

His eyes gradually widened. He blinked several times as his lips gapped.

"What did you say?" he stuttered.

I chuckled and shook my head.

"Let's try it, Chaos," I said then turned my back on him.

"I'm going home! I'll be back tomorrow to woo!" he shouted when I was in front of the bedroom door.

I didn't look at him again and just opened the door. The smile on my lips earlier disappeared so quickly the moment I entered the room.

I know it's wrong to decide without thinking it thoroughly. But I also knew in my heart that it was right to give Chaos a chance. He has saved me and my son over the years. If there’s someone I have to give a chance, Chaos deserves it more than my ex-husband.

"Erom," I affectionately call as I walked towards the bed.

He slowly got up when I reached his side.

"Thank you, Mom," he uttered when he reached out for the glass.

I smiled and combed his hair. "Anything for you, my prince."

I thought he was going to drink the milk but I was so surprised when he just stared at it for the next few seconds.

"Is there a problem, son?" I calmly asked.

He slowly lifted his head and looked at me. "Mom...is he angry?" he asked again.

My forehead knotted at his question. "No, son. Why would your Dad be mad at you?" I laughed for a while to soothe him.

Erom bit his lower lip and gradually shook his head. "I am referring to...Daddy," he said lowly.

I stiffened on my place. I felt my blood drained the moment my son stared at me.

"He's my real dad, right?"

I couldn't speak for a second even if I wanted to. I don’t know what to say, I don’t know what answer.

"I-I hurt him," Erom stated hoarsely. "I didn't mean to say those words, Mom," he explained.

"S-son," the only word that came out of my mouth then caressed his face. "H-how did you ..." I swallowed and shook my head. "He's not your fathe—"

"You don't have to lie, Mom," he cut me off.

I was out of words. I could do nothing but stare at my son who was staring blankly at me. Seeing him, looking at me that way reminded me of his dad¾their eyes, the emotion, everything.

"Chaos is your Papa, Erom," I insisted.

He gave me a small smile and nodded. "Yes, he is. But ... he's not my real father, Mom."

"How did you... How did you say he wasn't your father?"

Erom averted his eyes and played the glass with his hands. "Because a family has to live together in one house, right?" he spoke softly and looked at me again. "You and Papa are always good to each other po. But despite of it, we're not living in one roof," he pointed out.

My lips gapped to what he pointed out. I can’t quite imagine a five-year-old boy like him could think that.

I shut my eyes and calmed myself. I took a deep breath and looked at my child.

"Since when? When did you know he is your father?" I faintly questioned.

He lowered his head. "Since I hugged him that day...at the mall."

I bit my lower lip when I remembered that scene. I slowly took the glass from my son was and put it on the bedside table, then I hugged him.

"Are you mad at me?"

Erom slowly shook his head in response and hugged me back. "I knew you have your reason for lying, Mom."

I could not help but cry and kiss the top of her head.

"I'm sorry," I sincerely said. "I'm sorry for lying, my prince."

"It is okay, Mom. Everyone is lying," he said.

I slowly pulled away and nodded to stare at him. "Does that mean you lied too?"

Erom quickly nodded. "I lied to him..." he murmured and lowered his head. "I lied to my dad that I didn't know him."

My son's eyes turned red when he looked up at me again. I just hugged him again to ease his heart.

"I hurt him, Mom," my child whispered and silently sobbed.

"Shhh. It is okay. Like you said, you did not mean that," I consoled.

Erom shook his head. "I should have listened to him first, Mommy. I should have forgiven him and gave him a chance, but I did the opposite instead."

I could not move from my place. Hearing a five year old child telling those words attacked something inside me.

My son and I have very different perspectives. Even if I wanted to do what he said, I knew I couldn't. I am always preceded by anger, by pain, and resentment.

I can accept what happened to Valjerome and I, but that doesn't mean I can forget.

I let my child cry and took out his frustrations until he fell asleep. I thoroughly combed his hair with my fingers as I stared into his bubbly face.

"Take it easy, son. Don't grow too fast,” I whispered and smiled sparingly.

I closed our distance and kissed him on his forehead. I stared at him again until my phone rang.

I carefully pulled myself away from Erom and picked up my phone on the table. I frowned when I saw the unfamiliar number. I hesitated if I would answer that until finally I decided to answer the call.

"Hija," someone on the other line immediately started to speak.

"Manang?" I said surprisingly.

"Dear, can you come here to the mansion?" she asked.

I didn't answer right away.

"Señior is very drunk. He does not want anyone to interfere. He's been shooting his guns in his room. He also does not let us in. Maybe, you can stop him," the old lady said anxiously.

Still, I couldn't utter any words.

"I know you're very mad at him, dear. But I am begging you, really. Do it for me, at least. It was like I am about to have a heart attack.”

I closed my eyes tightly and took a deep breath.

"Wait for me."