Chapter 116: Chapter 116
I laugh softly trying to pulling back myself together and smile. “Well, guess we’re done now… I have to meet someone at the library and apply for my job application” I say. “What?! You’re going to work? Like seriously?” Z surprises. “Yeah, you know… I need to stay away from my bed and do some work so I won’t gain you know… more fat” I chuckle. “Hahaha you still look great though!” She chuckles as she looks at me.
“Mmmm well, I should go!” I sigh and I up from my bunk. “Oh, o-okay…” She up from my bed too and get ready to go, but before that she turn around and facing me. I was scanning over the drawer to get some paper and a pen. “H-hey… Maia?” Z calls me and it’s distracted me. “Yeah?” I up from my knee and look at her who stands not far from me. “Do you have a map? Because I just keep getting lost in your eyes…” She says.
I stand in freeze with a raised brow as I look at her “Did you just…” I chuckle tensely. “Hahahaha” Z laughs as she looks at me. “Guess who gets surprises now… I just wanna say, thanks Maia for taking care of me, that’s all… Okay, I gotta go!” She chuckles and leaves my room after, her face down to the ground as she keeps smiling and disappearing into the prison corridor. I write my application letter and get ready to go then.
I do not want to think about Lena and Z or Ben now, all matter is how I can get the job so I can distract myself from the riot in my brain. I walking down to the prison corridor and hiding from prisoners or someone that I knew, making my way to the library smooth and quick with the flip-flop that I bought at the commissary. I get into the library with big smiles on my face and meeting the woman which Katty told me.
“Hello…” I place my ass on the seat and get ready to place my application form. “Hello? Good afternoon. What can I do for you?” She starts. “Hey! Ummm my friend told me that you had one left job in here, I’m here to apply for that job…” I reply nervously, my eyes running around the spot, looking around the place but not looking for Lena, I just felt nervous because it’s my first time applying for a job in prison.
“Sorry, from which block are you?” The officer asks. “Umm A block” I reply. “Oh, I see… Have you ever worked in prison before?” The officer asks. “Mmm no, it’s my first” I respond. “What makes you interested in this job, tell me?” She asks more questions. “Holy shit! It’s harder than applying for a job outside! This woman got me insane” I say deep inside, mumbling to myself. “I need to keep moving so my system does not dead…”
“And mmm so I wouldn’t end up on my bed every single day” I chuckle tensely. “Mmm cool! So what job you’re in where you’re outside?” She asks more questions. “Mmmm I worked as a CEO and umm online magazine writer, but that’s a long time ago” I chuckle nervously. My teeth crashed one another as I gazed at her and grin. “Wow… that’s great!” She surprises, knowing that an inmate like me was had nice jobs outside before end up here.
“But unfortunately…” She closes my letter and sighs, which’s making me tense and sweat. “We don’t have more job left which you applied on your application letter. You came late and somebody had already applied for that job” She explains. “But… we do have one job left!” She says. “Can you teach yoga?” She asks. “W-what?!” I respond surprisingly, my brows raised. “Oh, of course! Mmm yeah, I can!” I grin with a big awkward smile on my face.
Damn, I sit in here for a librarian job but this officer gave me the yoga class job, I do yoga but that was a long time ago. “Great! The class is from Friday to Sunday, we do have a couple of people who joined the class already. You know… these woman needs to do some exercises that could reduce anxiety and stress!” She states. “Hey, is this class is a new thing in here? I mean… do you have another yoga class besides this?” I ask curiously.
“Oh, we do have yoga class! But the yoga teacher is out a month ago, so now we opened a new class” She explains. “Oh… right” I nod my head and smile, don’t know what to do, I’m digging my grave down deeper to the ground. I was applying for this job so I can see Lena from distance but I came late and failed. “Okay, I think we’ve done! Congratulations you’re hired!” The officer hangs her hand to me.
“Thank you…” I grin and shook her hand tensely, my body gets cold. I up from the seat and quickly make my way out “Shit! Shit!” I mumble as I keep walking, my face down to the prison floor. “Yoga teacher, really?” I talk to myself and sigh. How can I be a yoga prison teacher, I even failed to went to my second yoga class because I had my body hurts at my first class. That was when Lena and I still together, I woke her up at night to massage my back that time.
“Ugh!” I accidentally bump into someone. My face was down to the ground so I didn’t saw her. “Oh gosh! I am so sorry” I help her up without seeing her face. “Maia?” She calls my name. I point my gaze at her and seeing her. “Cara?” I surprise, my eyes bulged. Cara is my high school study buddy, we went to the same high school and college. “Oh my God! what are you doing here?” She surprises when she saw me wrapped around the prison uniform.
“I’m fucked up, you know” I chuckle as I pointing my gaze to the open green ground which closed with the iron cage. After our meeting, Cara and I walked towards the open ground and sat on the green field, there are a lot of prisoners here who running around the field or having a noon moment with their friends. “So you shot the crystal hang lamp and the crystal flakes fell and slashed that man?” Cara laughs aloud as she hides her laughter with her palm.
“That’s hilarious, Maia. And badass!” She shook her head as she held her laugh. “I know I’m fucked up you know… but being here is better than being around my family and fiancé!” I chuckle and lean my hands down to the ground to support my body. “Oh, so you're engaged?!” She surprises. “Ah, I was! But I broke up already” I scoff. “Oh, at least these prison clothes look good on you” Cara laughs.
“And it’s better than those gothic costumes that you wore at prom” She ends with a few giggles. “Oh, Jeez! You remembered that!” I squeak. “I slipped on my own dress and fell, that’s was so fucking embarrassing day to me! Thank God I’m not seeing those people again after that incident” I scoff and heavily breathing, I close my eyes when I felt the grass smelled touch my nose, it relaxes me and made me forgot all burdens in my chest.
“But this place… huh!” Cara heavily sighs as she closes her eyes. “Does not a better place as you said…” She ends. “What do you mean?” I respond as I point my gaze at her. “These women dreaming of the free life out there, they’re waiting for the opportunity to start a new life, a better life! With their family and kids… or maybe spouses” Cara sighs as she keeps continue to her sentences and I keep listening to her sentence and look at her, wail out.
“I knew someone from the C block. She was gets arrested because she stole some loaves of bread for her kids to eat at the grocery store! You know… they were homeless and having a difficult life! Now their mom locked in prison. What can those kids do after that? Waiting for their mom to out and starving?” She sighs. “Have you asked that woman if she knows where are her kids now?” I ask. “Ummm nope! I hadn’t” Cara sighs, her face down to the ground.
“I felt sorry for those people… this damn world does not deserve them” She ends. “It’s sad you know… I mean, some people born into a nice privileged family but they kept wishing that they’re not born from that family. It same goes to me! I born into a nice privileged family who can afford everything I want in life, but I kept praying that I’d never born in this damn world…” I sigh. “Mmmm sometimes life is not always fair…” Cara sighs.
Yes, life is not always fair. It’s sad but it’s true. But if we focus on what we had now, it makes us grateful for everything we had already in life. I was so ungrateful and greedy, now I’ve learned from everything I heard and seen. Life is not regretted but it’s a place where we should be grateful for what we had and fix all the mistakes that we made in the past. Life is once, so why don’t I fix my mistakes and be a better person for my better future life.