Chapter 13: Chapter 13

While the girls went shopping, I sat in their living room with Ethan and Jayden and reflected on the past few days.

It was just good to have Samira by my side. She was funny, smart and beautiful. She could even take on Ethan, that's how quick-witted my companion was. But despite the joy and love she gave me, I didn't feel happy. It wasn't like everyone had described, it was different.

Instead of forgetting everything, Lou still popped up in my thoughts and instead of being completely happy, it felt like a part of me was broken forever and not even Samira could help me get over it.

I left my little one just so that we could be happy with the people who were destined for us, but I was starting to doubt fate, because although I liked being with Samira and also felt something like attraction and desire, it was pure love , which I had got to know through Lou, I didn't feel that with her.

Like I'm an alcoholic and Samira is my favorite drink while Lou is a still glass of water.

"What's going on?" Jayden pulled me out of my thoughts and only then did I realize that the girls had come back and Samira was beaming at me happily.

"I found a great dress," she said happily and sat down right next to me and it was all about her again. With her so close to me, I could forget about Lou because I was drunk on the alcohol and shutting out everything else.

"I'm glad," I replied and put my arm around her shoulders to listen to the others.

"She looks really exhausted, you should check on her more often," Chiara said to Jayden and I immediately knew who it was about.

"I can't talk to her! She kicked me out and as soon as I set foot in her hut, she throws vases and cups at me. Do you want her to kill me?" the black-haired retorted and I noticed his glance at me and also Samira stared at me curiously.

I avoided her eyes and stared at the TV without showing a reaction. The turmoil made it hard for me to think, and then I heard something from Ethan that made my stomach churn.

"My God! Then just look for this tattooed guy. He's her companion, so he should take care of it. He always drives around here at night on his motorcycle, so go see him."

At the thought of Lou getting touched by a guy like that, a growl rose in my throat and I immediately swallowed it down with a lot of force and turned to Samira not to go crazy.

"Would you like to show me the dress?" I smiled at her and she took it out of her bag with a grin.

Wow. It was short, very short. In the end it was just a touch of nothing. At the thought of others seeing her like this, I growled again and in a flash, I stood up and walked past the others out into the rain without saying a word. It can't be that I feel the same for two women, even though they were all such different feelings.

I forced myself to get Lou out of my head. It was the right thing that we broke up and yet it felt so wrong. But Samira, she was so beautiful and was my mate.

Angry at the chaos, I kicked over Ethan's mailbox and desperately sat on the curb.

"What's going on?" Jayden came out of the house behind me and sat right next to me.

"I'm so confused. Your sister spits around in my head, even though I know it's wrong. She only disappears when I have Samira with me. I'm starting to think I'm going crazy."

He looked at me long and hard and then put a hand on my shoulder.

"Did you already with Samira... you know?"

"No," I said immediately, shocked, and stood up in panic. It all happened too fast for me.

"Maybe it's because of that," he got up and faced me. "You have to mark them."

I swallowed hard and my heart skipped a beat. Was that really what I had to do?

"See you tomorrow," Misha said goodbye and left me alone in front of the store while I thought about what to do next. It was already getting dark and I really didn't want to go home as I would probably only worry about whether they would have sex today or not.

Just that spark of imagination in my head almost made me cry again, but I swallowed it down and did exactly what I'd done before when I'd felt such grief. I decided to drown the sorrow in the Wialtrama. The others were celebrating their birthdays anyway and Jayden certainly wouldn't go partying without Chiara.

On the way to the club I kept looking at my yellow rubber boots and thought about going to change clothes again, but what for anyway? I didn't want to look good for anyone anymore anyway.

As soon as I said hello to Eddie and sneaked through the door and curtain, the music put me in a good mood and even if it was so tiny, I was incredibly happy to feel something other than just pain.

Just as I then took several small steps towards the bar, my eyes suddenly met Alecs, who was sitting at the bar in a well-dressed way and smiling at me. Idiot, I just thought to myself and wanted to turn around and in the other direction when I bumped into someone and widened my eyes in shock.

"Sorry, I-" My

heart almost stopped when I recognized Chace, who had just entered the store with Ethan, Jayden, and the blonde. I smothered any feelings I was feeling and looked down to desperately see that they were holding hands.

Everyone was looking at me, apparently waiting to see if I was going to freak out, but I wouldn't give that bitch the satisfaction. I tuned out everything and turned to my brother.

"Happy birthday," I whispered to him in a weak voice and immediately fled into his arms. "Thanks," he smiled as he pulled away and then the blonde said she had to address me stupidly from the side.

"Nice shoes," she grinned and I didn't even have to look down to understand that she was making fun of me and luckily my brother got my attention back.

"Who are you here with?" he demanded and I looked at Chace, whose green eyes studied me as if he were seeing me for the first time. I froze briefly, caught in his gaze, until the blonde snuggled closer to him and he then avoided my gaze.

I understood immediately what his eyes wanted to tell me. He felt sorry for him, but I didn't want that because I still loved him and wished him all the happiness in the world. He should think that I'm fine so that he could be fine too, that was my dearest wish. My moon should shine with joy and not be dragged down by the sight of me.

"Me? Yeah...well-" I started, turning to see Alec still watching me. "Oh haha. Now I understand your question. I'm here with Alec," I said loudly for Alec to hear, hoping they would believe me. They all looked at the guy at the bar and when I turned around he was suddenly right next to me and put his arm around my shoulder.

"Are you coming, darling?" he said very calmly, looking into my eyes and suddenly goosebumps developed on my arms and I could literally feel my cheeks turning red. I really appreciated his help, but what would he ask for it? He shouldn't think that that would bring me closer to him, because I only wanted one and that was the one who was running towards the tables angrily with the blonde by the hand.

"Well then, have fun tonight," Jayden grinned and when he and Ethan disappeared between the few people, I could finally breathe again.

"Thank you," I whispered, twisting out from under his arm to look into his eyes.

"You're welcome, do you want something to drink?"

No, I didn't want to, but I couldn't walk anymore either, and dancing without him would be conspicuous. I didn't want to be a pathetic joke anymore, so I nodded, smiling, and walked alongside him to the bar, but not without a quick glance at the table, where his green eyes were staring back at me. What was the matter with him? He looked so hateful staring at us. Did he hate me for loving him, or rather for still loving him? I didn't know and focused on Alec, who held out his hand for me to sit on one of the high stools.

"So, what do you-"

"Tequila, preferably a whole bottle," I blurted out and suddenly he laughed so heartwarmingly that I was carried away too. It felt beautiful.