Chapter 21: Chapter 21

Until you rightfully say what you said

Aae Ocala Huang Agoncillo's POV

12 years later

"Your wife is still not here?" The event coordinator asked while sipping on her tea.

I looked at her and saw the irritation in her face before checking my leather watch. It's already seven in the evening. I picked up my phone on the side of my hot chocolate and checked for a reply. I even restarted my phone thinking the signal might be poor. Though deep down, I know she's not answering my calls.

"She's on her way. She has a lot of work to do in the hospital," I lied. I don't even know what she was doing, but it might be true considering she's on duty.

"I see. It must be hard to be a doctor," she replied as she placed back the cup of tea on the table. She took the magazine on her hand before glancing at me. "I can wait for half an hour but if she isn't here yet-"

"Sorry, I'm late." Her sweet voice made us turn. She was gasping for air as she smiled at us. She bent a little to remove the cushion on the seat before positioning herself. She placed it beside her as she opened the bottled water. "There's a lot of patients in the emergency. What did I miss?"

You miss a lot, Zee.

"Wait, is that Astilbe?" The event coordinator pointed at her necklace. It's a pink-fern petal she'd been wearing for the last years. "It's rare, must be customized." She commented. The event coordinator glanced at it with amazement as if it was her first time to see something like that.

Zee stopped her desire to drink water as she closely looked at the event coordinator. "Uh, no?" She raised an eyebrow. "It's False Goat's Beard."

The event coordinator chuckled. "Yeah right, It's the other term,"

"Really?" She caressed the pendant with a sad smile on her face. When was the last time I saw a genuine smile on her?

"Your husband must truly love you to give you that flower." The event coordinator added with envy on her face. "Do you know what it means?"

"What?" I watched her downturned eyes inched a little as she pulled her green scrunchies to tie her long ash brown hair. I believe the word husband frustrates her.

"The flower symbolizes patience and dedication. When someone gives it to you it is like saying, I will wait for the rest of my life," she explained. She even giggled at her own words. "I guess, Mr. Agoncillo gave it to you when you're still a couple. That's so sweet-"

"I wasn't the one who gave her that," I firmly replied. I twitched my lips when I felt a sudden bolt of pain in my chest.

"Oh, then who gave it to you?" She gave us exchanging looks. I know what she is thinking. It's not her business. Why is she even our event coordinator? What was her name again? Well, temporary people don't need a name in my vocabulary.

"Uh, just someone I know." Zee curled her lips.

Just someone you know, Zee? Is it true? I cried in my thoughts.

"Anyway, let's talk about the theme." She felt the pendant on her fingers before turning to us. Is that regret that crossed her eyes?

"Right, Mr. Agoncillo chose this particular theme." The event coordinator pointed at the magazine. It is a music-inspired theme. "Do you like them?"

"Yeah sure," she answered nonchalantly. She didn't even glance at them, she just said yes.

The event coordinator showed her everything I picked, and she planned. Throughout the talk, I watched Zee nod and said yes without the slightest bit of hesitation.

She's been like that since. For the last twelve years, I witnessed how her lips parted and her teeth touched each other as she said yes.

The event coordinator continued to tell her the details while I watched Zee trying to focus her attention. But, I know she wasn't paying attention. She played with her fingers as she tried to hide her boredom.

"Ah sure, yes," she replied again. She removed her white coat and placed it on her hips and went back to pretending again. Until when is she gonna pretend?

I took a sip on my chocolate drink without removing my gaze from her. My eyes turned to her white coat as I put back the cup in its place.

I traced the name written on it in my mind. Zee Katie Liu Zamora, MD.

Her image wearing the white uniform as she walked within the facility of the hospital crossed my mind. I will never forget how happy she was when she finally wore that coat. It's one of the few moments I counted her genuine happiness.

It suited her. It had always been her dream to become a doctor and now she is already in her fourth-year residency. Sooner or later, she would become a cardiothoracic surgeon.

It's all worth it by the look in her. Well, it should be worth it. She sacrificed everything to be where she is now.

"Okay, that's settled then." The event coordinator closed the magazine. "You must have loved each other so much that you have to marry twice," she said as she arranged the magazine and placed it inside her bag. Remind me to fire her next time she minds our business.

"I'll see you then on the day of the pictorial. Let me know if you want to add something." She stood up and bowed. Zee returned it with a slight bow while I just nodded.

She waited for the event coordinator to leave the place before watching the crowd of people passing by the coffee shop. It took seconds before she turned to me but quickly avoided my gaze.

I have enjoyed the silence and like the idea of being alone. Yet, this silence between us was killing me. I wanna scream, yet where's my voice? I lost it while trying to find her.

"Let's grab dinner?" I asked, hoping she would say yes. But I guess, I was the exception in every yes she could produce.

"No, I'm fine. I have to go back. I'm still on duty." She pretended to wipe the dirt on her white coat to avoid my eye. Does it really hurt her to look at my eyes?

"You're on duty or you just don't want to eat with me?" I creased my brows. I surveyed her eyes down to her lips. I missed her smile...that I took away.

She pursed her lips and sighed. "I'm full. I really need to go back to the hospital." I grabbed her wrist before she could move another step away from me.

She quickly pulled it. "Sorry, they're looking for me." She didn't wait for my response and hurriedly went out of the shop.

I heaved.

I bent my head a little as I closed my eyes. I had to bite my lip to stop the shot of liquid trying to fall in my eyes. Did she really forgive me?

I left money on the table and followed her trail. The coffee shop was just a walk from the hospital where she was staying. I stopped mid-way when I found her standing beside the street lamps. She was staring at the sky while her hands were crossed in her back.

It was a clear night sky. I witnessed how her lips formed a curve when a plane crossed the sky above. She focused her gaze on it until a drop of liquid fell from the side of her eyes.

I shut my eyes. It hurt me to see her in pain. I couldn't even do a thing for her. I always cursed myself, because deep down I know I was one of the reasons why she was suffering.

I'm afraid she lost herself trying to find me.

It took a second before I opened my eyes. She was already wandering and I felt how heavy those steps were. Sorry, Zee. Sorry, my love.

I had to stop again when I noticed the group of people scattered around the area. At glance, you would think they were just normal people but the truth is they were the butlers sent by her family to watch her. I told you, she lost everything to be where she is right now. It included her freedom.

Since college, she wasn't allowed to go anywhere she pleased without the approval of her parents. Unless she's with me. She wasn't allowed to use her phones or social media accounts. They even put trackers on the phone she is using now.

She became a damsel in distress waiting for a prince to save her. I tried to save her, but how could I save her when I was the one who shattered her?

Zee wore her coat upon reaching the nurse station. I know she caught me following her but she always pretended she didn't know. She never cared at all.

"Dra. Zamora." A new intern with curly hair waved her left hand upon seeing her. "You know what?"

"What?" She said as she scanned the patient's files. "I'll do my rounds and take a rest. Don't slack when I'm not around."

"We counted nine planes today." The intern beside the curly girl grinned at her. "You lost the bet, you told us there are no planes that crossed this path."

"Really? But, it's true. There's none," she casually replied. She picked her pen in her pocket and wrote something on the patient's log before turning her eyes on the computer.

"Eh? You're lying." Another intern with a chocolate drink on hand frowned. "We've seen it. How could you not know when you always spend your time counting planes on the rooftop?"

She shook her head. "I'm not lying."

I faked a smile. Yes, of course, she wasn't lying.

There's none because none of them had ever brought back the man she's been waiting for.

She picked her green Littman stethoscope and circled it in her neck before leaving the nurse station. "Do your rounds before Dr. Arellano gets mad," she yelled before turning to the emergency room.

"Uh, night shift sucks!" The intern who talked about the planes stretched her back before fixing her coat. "We have to remind Dra. Zamora again for our treat."

"Yes, but isn't it sweet. She always watched the planes above because her boyfriend is a captain." The new nurse who just came back reacted after chewing the bread on hand.

"I think it's already her husband, right? They got married. It was published in a magazine and business newspapers. She was real bigtime and her husband too." The intern pointed up as if she thought of something interesting.

I hissed. Do girls really love gossiping about other people's lives?

"Hmm, then why isn't she using her husband's surname?" The nurse curiously asked.

I scowled and decided to put my earphones before I could hear another word that would make me curse them. I played my Mayday Parade playlist as I leaned my back on the chair.

Oh, Florida, please be still tonight

Don't disturb this love of mine

Look how she's so serene

You've gotta help me out

I suddenly recalled the first time I had a casual conversation with Zee when the song hit my senses. I made a smile as I closed my eyes. I imagined the look in her eyes as she searched for her earphone. Truth be told, I purposely kept hers when she left it on the bleachers and exchanged mine. Well, it was the means I thought to get her attention. I was still keeping it with me and somehow afraid she would hate me again when all I wanted was for her to see me before...even until now.

So I'll sing a melody

An hope to God she's listening

Sleeping softly while I sing

And I'll be your memories

Your lullaby for all the times

Hoping that my voice could get it right

I completed ten songs before hearing her voice again. I suddenly hated the man who taught me how to count songs. I never unlearned it.

"Hey." The three interns stopped what they were doing to face her. "We got no stacks of food, so can you please buy all the things listed here."

The interns nodded with pouting lips. She checked the silver watch on her right wrist and I noticed her naked fingers. She's still not wearing it.

"I'll be in the resident's quarter. If something happens beep me up, okay?" She removed the stethoscope circling in her neck and put it inside her coat's pocket.

"Okay, Dra. Zamora," they all answered in chorus.

"Call me or Dr. Arellano as soon as the patient who underwent CABG surgery wakes up." She commanded with her sweet voice.

I looked at her back as she pulled her scrunchies and brushed her hair away. I stood up and slowly stepped towards her, catching the attention of the interns standing next to her. I've seen then gasped as I removed my earphones and tilted my head a little.

She suddenly turned her back and our eyes accidentally crossed.

"Aae..." she whispered, surprised.

"Hey, I'll drive you home," I suggested even though I know she would not go home with me. She never did.

"Oh, so you are the captain?" The curly hair intern widened her eyes upon glancing at me. She even stared at me from head to toe. I frowned to myself. She must be new along with the other interns and nurses since I usually come here to visit Zee.

"Woah, so you are the guy who likes this, right?" Another intern handed the pack of banana milk while the rest gave us exchanging looks.

I left my mouth hanging and slowly bent my head. How did they know about banana milk?

Zee was stunned for a moment. She twitched her lips and I saw the frustration in her face as she pulled her hair up. I hate it when she does that.

She stared at the pack of banana milk and I watched how she opened her mouth but lost words to say.

I managed to make a fake smile while trying to hide the pain in my voice. "I don't like banana milk." I wish I liked them, but I wouldn't exchange chocolates for bananas.

Before the interns could say a thing, she grabbed the banana milk and glared at them. "If you don't want an extra shift next week, you better go back to work."

Zee didn't let them finish as she put the banana milk in her free pocket. I jerked when I felt the heat of her palm on my wrist as she pulled me away from the nurse station.

We stopped upon reaching the elevator. She let go of my hand. "What are you doing here?" She raised an eyebrow.

"Why? Can I not be here?" I asked, hurt.

"No, I mean." She wagged her head. "It's already past ten, you should go home and rest."

"I'll go home with you." I pleaded. "Let's go home and take a rest."

"Uh, I'll sleep in the resident's quarters. You know, I can't." She quickly replied.

"Even just once?" I crossed the distance between us and pulled her close to me. I circled my arms on her while feeling her heavy breathing on my chest. I could smell vanilla as I caressed her hair. Why does it hurt so much?

"Aae-"

I cut her off. "Where is your ring?" I asked as soon as I let her go. There was a panic in her expression as she tried to pull her hand from me but I was too quick to tighten the grip.

"I-I left it in my room," she stammered. "I was in surgery a while ago and I forgot to wear it again."

I nodded a little as I bent my head to the side. I let go of her hand and closely scrutinized the accessory in her neck. "But you didn't forget to wear your necklace?"

She instantly moved a step backward. She blinked and was trying to say something but decided to shut her mouth. I know, Zee. You don't need to lie.

I smiled a little. I took the small box in my pocket and placed it on her trembling hands. "If you can't wear our ring, let me see you wearing this necklace."

I tilted my head while I waited for her to speak. Are you gonna wear it?

She stared at it until she dropped her hands on the side. "Ah yeah, anyway I have to-" I placed my hands on her chin and pulled her as my lips reached for hers. I moved my lips and my tongue tried to find its way in her mouth.

I cursed in my thoughts when she didn't return the kiss. I gritted my teeth upon letting her go.

Damn! What am I doing?

She bowed her head a little as the elevator rang. "You're tired...go home and take a rest."

I cupped my face out of frustration. "Why?" I felt my voice shake.

She raised an eyebrow and gave me an innocent look as if she doesn't know what I was talking about. "What?"

"Why did you agree with the wedding...when," I bit my lower lip as I deeply sighed. "You don't even love me."

"Just go home and rest. We're both tired." She turned her back on me. I pulled her scrunchies from her hair and irritation registered in her face when she turned to me.

"Have you forgiven me?" I begged.

She parted her lips but again couldn't find her voice. I hated it. I hated how she wanted to say something but always ended up speechless. I wanted to hear her scream at me, cursed me, yet she remained wordless all these years.

I wanna listen to her laughter again. What should I do?

"Say something." I urged.

She smiled, but it never reached her eyes. "I did." She nodded before going inside the elevator.

I smirked. "But not enough to love me, right?"

I punched the wall as soon as the elevator closed. Fuck!

I was savoring my chocolate drink upon leaving the grocery store near the hospital when a girl suddenly stopped in front of me. I raised an eyebrow as she closed her eyes and sniffed me. What is she a dog?

I moved backward and turned to the side to avoid her but she caught my arms. "What?" I scowled.

"What's your perfume?"

"None of your business." I frowned and quickly walked away from her.

"Why so grumpy?" I heard her scowled and someone shouted her name. I ignored her and strode to the hospital.

I easily recognized the fatigue in Zee as I reached the emergency room. She sat on the floor with her eyes closed as she leaned on the wall. I could hear her hard breathing from afar. Her scrubs were full of blood. She still had her eyes closed when she massaged her neck.

I heard there was a bus accident and a lot of critical patients were admitted. I suddenly felt the urge to hug her and drag her away from this place.

"Dra. Zamora, they need you in the operating room." The intern was bathing with sweat and blood as he bent on his knees to breathe air.

Zee blew air before putting both of her hands up as a sign of surrender. "Yeah yeah." She opened her eyes and slowly stood up. She jumped once and almost stumbled upon leaving the room.

I sighed. I felt sorry for her, though I'm clearly amazed at how she managed to do everything. Every time I see her exhausted from surgeries and emergencies I wanted to encourage her to stop and change her career. Yet I know she fought hard to be where she is now. I'm in no position to take it away from her. I already took a lot from her.

I wrote a note on a small paper and left the groceries at the nurse station. The nurse recognized me with a nod while still busy checking files on her seat.

I checked my silver watch before turning to the waiting area. I bent my head as I searched for my earphone. Has she eaten yet?

I skipped breakfast hoping I could eat with her but I guess I have to wait until lunch...or dinner? Fuck! I'm getting worried at her. It was her job to take care of people but she couldn't even eat at the right time.

I was sitting there for an hour when the code blue was called within the facility. In a glimpse, the medical team started rushing inside the emergency room. Chaos was evident as the nurses and interns ran from one side to another as they attended to the patients.

I could feel the terror and rush in them as they don't know what to do first. Just then I saw Zee running towards the nearest patient. I immediately noticed the redness at the back of her hand as she examined the patient's body.

I cursed at my mind. She couldn't properly take care of herself and look at how she managed to take good care of people.

"What happened here?" she yelled at the nurse.

"It's a plane crash, Dra," the nurse responded as she hurriedly carried a machine.

"Plane crash?" She asked as she examined the patient. "Get me an ET!" She quickly ordered. "How many are injured? Critical? Where are the other doctors?!"

"Prof. Argazon and Sead are still in surgery!" Lauyton, her friend from medical school answered as he checked the pulse of the patient. "Four are in critical condition. The rest contain minimal injuries. I'll do this, wait for the captain. He was in a cardiac arrest on his way!"

"What!? Prepare AED! Prepare the bed over there!" She pointed at the empty bed.

She ran to press the alarm again to call the attention of the other doctors. When she found no luck she dashed to meet the ambulance outside while the rest of the nurses and interns assisted the other patients.

My phone rang as soon as the ambulance siren reached the facility. I stood up to leave the area but stopped mid-way when a nurse shouted.

"Dra. Zamora was down on her knees!"

"What?!" Lauyton cursed.

"She was crying!"

Why would she cry?

"Why the hell is she crying?! Call her now!"

I hide my bitterness when Arellano appeared in the room. She liked Zee - not even sure if it is already past tense.

He wiped his sweat before screaming his frustration. "Slap her to bring back her senses!" Arellano dashed to the patient who just came in.

My questions were answered when I caught a glimpse of the man they're reviving.

Zendaya.