Chapter 14: Chapter 14

Two Months Later...

LUNAR'S P.O.V

"Wear the red, or the blue." Tess says but I throw on my simple black gown instead and put on sandals.

"At least try to show interest."

"I can't pretend to be excited when I'm not, I'm only going on this because you asked." I say as I grab my car keys.

Ever since the accident, I decided to finally get my own car so that the moment I feel like driving off in a haste, I'll at least be wrecking my own car.

"I'll probably see you in an hour." I say and Tess gets up from her bed and hugs me.

She does that a lot now every time I'm about to leave the room,...like I'm going to have another accident.

I shudder at the thought.

"Try to play nice. It's your first date since Nathan." She says and I roll my eyes.

"You make it sound like I haven't been living my life as usual. I don't need a guy to survive Tess."

"I know that. But I don't want you to have a negative view of guys." She pleads and I shrug.

"Sure, whatever." I say and leave.

Dating Nathan hadn't defined me, because even though it was hard...I found myself laughing and smiling and living everyday.

Like it was easy.

But it wasn't...And it isn't. I still see him, his green eyes, his thick hair and that amazing side smile, his deep laughter and the soft way he calls my name.

When I'm alone memories of him and with him creep into my thoughts and release the bolt on my tears.

I still did my charity routine, and I still bumped into him every time I stepped into their restaurant....

Or in class...

Or the cafe...

Dating Nathan hadn't defined me, but it had affected me in ways that could never be replaced...

Or forgotten.

And no matter how much I try not to,.... I still remember.

NATHAN'S P.O.V (Song: Mess is Mine).

"Stay still." I say to Emily as I fix her seatbelt in the passenger seat of my car, but she is still giddy and excited.

"Can we have both burgers and fries?!" She asks and I chuckle as I start the car.

"Of course. They come together."

"Can we have burgers and fries and pizza?" She squeals with excitement.

"No, you'll get a stomach cramp. I promised your mum we'll get just one meal. So what's it gonna be? Pizza or Burgers?"

"Whose is this?" Emily asks and I briefly turn to what she's holding.

There is no doubting who the grey beanie belongs to.

"Lunar." I say and I'm swarmed with the usual memories that I get when I say her name....Which happens a lot.

Sometimes when I'm sleeping and dreaming of her...

Or when I see her at the restaurant and she waves at me with that tight smile...

Or in class.

I wish she wasn't so far away...that I had handled this better.

Handled us better.

But at least she is happy, when I briefly pass her by or catch her laughing at something or asking a brilliant question in class.

She is happy. And that's all that matters. I can't rebuild what we had...

But at least I can relive it.

All I have to do is remember....

****

"Burger and chips! Burger and chips!" Emily is chanting as I park the car and we head for the restaurant.

"Shh...if you make noise, they might kick you out." I say to her and her chants mellow to whispers.

"Burger and chips. Burger and chips." She whispers and I chuckle as we walk inside, through the revolving doors.

"Wow. This is the fanciest burger restaurant I've ever been." She says with enthusiasm and I laugh.

"Well, it is your birthday. So do you want to eat here or take away?" I ask and she smiles.

"I'm definitely eating here."

We find a table and sit and waiter comes to our table.

"Good evening and welcome to Greg's. May I take your order?" She asks, bending low to hand us the menus but I don't bother to look.

"Two portions of the burger meal and soda. With ice, please." I say and I turn back to Emily.

And that's when I see her.

Two tables ahead, barely listening to the guy sitting opposite her and talking.

Her hand is lazily holding her fork but her eyes are on me.

Lunar.

***

LUNAR'S P.O.V

I heard his laughter first.

That deep, fuzzy laughter like hot cocoa on a cold day.

And then I saw him, standing there in his intimidating height and size.

And Emily, his adorable niece bouncing up and down beside him as he picks a table.

And then the waiter came, a young lady trying hard to make Nathan notice her cleavage but I watch disappointment envelop her face as he makes his order and turns away without a second glance.

And then his gaze meets mine.

I don't know whether to smile or wave or both.

Or maybe I don't want to because Nathan is seeing me on a stupid blind date and I feel guilty.

Before I can make up my mind, Shane Carter draws my attention back.

"Lunar." He says and I blink, turning back to him.

"Sorry, I...got carried away. You were saying?"

From the side of my eye, I notice Nathan turns his attention back to his niece and for some reason...I'm disappointed.

Shane Carter is a typical nice guy. The kind of nice guy you read about in books. Pulling out chairs for me, holding the door, ignoring phone calls on a date, attractive smile, lots of eye contact, making cheerful jokes.

He was almost perfect.

But the sad realisation, which still haunts me till today remains.

He is not Nathan.

And I don't know if that is good or bad.

I look beyond Shane at Nathan and sure enough he has his eyes on me, steadily watching me.

"Are you okay?" Shane asks and I blink back to him.

"What?" I ask.

"You look lost. Do you need to leave or rest?" He asks and I shake my head as I put on a smile.

"No, I'm fine. Sorry, it's just been a while since I've been out on a date." I say and he smiles.

"Ditto. But seeing you made it easy." He says

"Excuse me?"

"You're beautiful." He says and I smile.

"Thank you."

"And now I'm sure I want to have a girlfriend. So long as it's you." He says and continues eating, like nothing happened.

"I'm sorry, girlfriend?" I ask and he nods.

"Well, yes."

"You must be mistaken. I was led to believe this was a simple blind date, just getting to know a stranger." I say and he frowns.

"Yeah, but we're not strangers anymore are we?" He insists and I nod stubbornly.

"Yes, we are. We're strangers and I'm not looking to date anytime soon." I say and to my surprise, Shane Carter drops his fork and wipes his mouth.

"Then I see no reason to spend more time with you."

And just like that he gets up and leaves.

I'm staring in shock as he walks out of the restaurant.

The damn fool couldn't even pay for his meal.

"Jerk." I mutter and focus on my food, ignoring Nathan's look.

NATHAN'S P.O.V

I watch the drama unfolds on Lunar's table and I try to focus on Emily but it's hard.

First they're having a conversation, well mostly the guy talking and Lunar stealing glances at me.

Then he draws her attention and she smiles at him. By the time the waiter brings I and Emily's order and I look back at her, I can tell she is pissed.

She nods and says something in a determined and stubborn manner and the guy gets up and leaves, leaving Lunar behind.

"Boy, you sure have been looking behind a lot." Emily says and before I can answer her, she turns too.

"Look, it's Lunar!" She squeals and Lunar's head snaps up at the sound of her name.

"Hiiii!" Emily says brightly and waves and Lunar giggles and waves back politely.

"Emily, that's enough. You don't want to disturb her." I say quietly to her but she turns back to me with a determined look.

"She's eating all alone. She should come sit with us." She insists and I decide to draw the line.

"No, Em. You can't do that, okay? She's a grown up and grown ups need their space. Remember?" I say to her using the saying her mum uses on her, but by the time I'm done talking, Emily scrambles out of her seat and heads to Lunar.

"Shit." I mutter as I watch Lunar talk to her pleasantly and just as I decide to go get Emily, to my surprise, Lunar gets up and follows Emily to our table.

"Hi Nathan." She says nicely as she sits down in the chair between Emily and I.

"Hey, Lu. I'm....um, I'm sorry about your date." I say and she shrugs.

"It's okay. At least I get to spend time with Emily on her birthday." She says and pinches Emily's cheeks while Emily busily munches on her burger and chips.

I want to hold her hand and tell her she can talk to me, that she can tell me how much of a jerk he was and we'll spend the evening dissing his terrible attitude.

I want to tell her that I miss her.

And I know she's upset and sad even though she is trying to hide it. But all that comes out is,

"So do you want a burger meal too?"

And she shakes her head politely.

"I already ate, but I'll just order a drink."

LUNAR'S P.O.V

"It's Lunar!"

The cheery voice draws my attention to Nathan's table and I see Emily waving frantically at me while Nathan nervously tries to stop her.

I wave back, unable to resist and she turns back to Nathan.

For some reason, I feel bad. I wish I could go to them, sit with them,....But I drew a line between Nathan and I.

And I can't cross it, no matter how bad I want to.

At least I get to tell Tess how horrible this date was and I'll have an excuse to never have to go on another blind date.

"Hi Lunar!"

Emily is suddenly at my table, smiling.

"Hi Emily."

"Would you like to come sit with us?" She asks, sounding excited and I smile.

"I would, but I don't think Nathan would like that." I say honestly and she giggles.

"Of course he will, he has been staring at you all night. Plus, it's my birthday. Plèeeeaaassseee?" She begs and I giggle as I grab my purse and drop the money for the food.

"Okay, let's go."

The minute I sat at the table, I was beginning to doubt my decision but Nathan kept the conversation easy and polite and soon enough, we were done.

"I gotta use the bathroom." Emily says after drinking every last bit of her soda. And just like that, she dashes to the bathroom.

"You look good." The words burst out of my mouth minutes after Emily has gone and Nathan looks at me surprised.

"Um, thanks." He says and I nod, feeling embarrassed.

Why did I say that?

Because he does look good.

He always looks good.

"Lu,..." Nathan calls my name and I look at him.

The look he is giving me draws up emotions, feelings and memories with him. Things that I had tried and failed to bury.

"Yes?" I let my emotions answer, waiting for what he has to say....waiting eagerly for what that look will interpret in words.

"I just want to say---"

"I'm back!" Emily exclaims, now at the table and by the time I look at Nathan, the look is gone.

"We should get going." He says as he pays the bill and I follow them out, wondering why I was so eager to hear what he had to say...

And worse, why I'm sad that I may never hear them.

Emily hops into the passenger seat and Nathan puts her seatbelt in place before shutting the door and turning to me.

"We had a nice time with you...And I hope it was better than what that guy had to offer." Nathan says, his protective look blanketing his face and I force a smile, knowing I don't have it in me to speak because I'm already swimming in feelings.

Feelings I try to deny.

Feelings for him and his care and safety and jokes and laughter...

I miss him. All of him.

Despite everything because it became clear overtime that my Nathan wasn't that Nathan from highschoool that bullied people.

My Nathan was the Nathan that realised how wrong he was.

My Nathan was the Nathan that backed away from everything he did wrong.

My Nathan was the Nathan that admitted he was wrong and accepted our break up, even though it was the last thing he wanted.

My Nathan was his mistakes and corrections and me knowing his wrong doings then yet accepting him as he is now.

"Oh, I almost forgot. Here." He hands me a small woolen cloth and I unfold it.

"My beanie." I say, my voice quivering as the memory of that day comes to me.

"I remember asking you if it looked good." I say and Nathan chuckles.

"Yeah. And over and over I kept telling you it did." He says

"But I took it off anyway."

"Because you thought it would mess up your hair." He says with his smile and I look up at him through my misty eyes.

"I remember....that it was our third date." My voice breaks and Nathan's smile vanishes.

"Lu?"

I don't let him finish as I burst into tears and Nathan pulls me close, into his warm embrace. The familiar feeling draws up more memories and I realise how much I've missed it, like an addict going back to drugs.

I clutch him close, savoring the moments as the tears come.

"It's okay...it's okay, Lu. Please don't cry."

"I don't know what I've been doing,...I don't...I don't know what to do without you." I say, my feelings pouring out and Nathan holds me close, saying nothing.

I wipe my tears now as I move back a little to look at him.

At his amazing green eyes.

"Nathan."

"Lunar." He says and his lips meet mine halfway, moving in rhythm like dancers to an old song.

He kisses me like he has missed me too, his hands around my waist, pulling me closer and I return the kiss completely.

Surrendering to the passionate, pleasurable feelings.

By the time we pull away, I look at him and his eyes are observing me. Waiting, contemplating, observing.

He's waiting to see where we go from here.

"I...um..." I start, backing away and he nods.

"Goodnight Lunar." He says and gets into his car.

And drives off.