Chapter 46: Chapter 46

On her way home, Ashy felt a pain in her heart. She did not know that this would be the outcome of her conversation with Paul. Maybe it was just a normal thing to her that she always cared about.

But on the other hand, he thought. Should she really understand him? Shouldn't she be mad with him because he lied in the first place? What if he didn't learn to love her? What if he just stood up to mediate between she and Storm?

While she was outside and waiting for the car, Storm who just arrived saw her in tears.

"Ash," he called her name. He was about to get out of the car but it stung his mouth as she walked away from him.

He got into his car to chase her.

"Ashy please stop. What happened? Can we talk? Listen to me. Do you really have to avoid me?" He asked as one hand came out of the car window.

There was no way out, so he parked the car right in front of Ashy.

He came down then approached her.

"Storm what? Isn't it clear to you yet? We don't have anything to talk about. I'm tired with everything. Stop following me, you won't get anything from me. " It's okay to avoid him again, but he held her hand.

Ashy immediately grabbed her hands and she looked at him wickedly.

"Ash, please. I know you're angry and I understand you. But I hope and I' asking you not to stay away from me like I'm sick."

"Maybe Storm. Maybe you're already sick. Literary you have brain disease."

"What? Are you kidding me? I have a brain disease? Are you saying I'm insaneM?" He asked in surprise as he opened his hands to look for an answer.

"It's not normal for you to interfere in my relationship with your brother. We've already talked. We understand that we should let each other go. I thought that was clear. Should I repeat and say it again and again just to remind you that? " Ashy asked him angrily.

"Have you talked yet?"

"Yes and he is mad at me. The trust he gave me was ruined because of what you did. Because of what you did together with your acomplices. Why did I believe what you said? Why I didn't think I shouldn't trust you. ! " she walked away from him.

"Why? Because that's what he told you? Because he sewed a lie so that I turned out to be the wrong and bad one?" It is an emotional question. The pain of the words from Ashy was visible on his face.

"Isn't it Storm? If you were able to lie on me begore, you were able to reverse what had happened, how much more now that you can almost afford to buy the world?" Ashy scolded him.

She knew his pride had been eroded. Based on the expression on his face, she knew and felt that he was embarrassed by what she said.

"Did I think we were done? Did I think we had a closure? Why do I feel like you're venting resentment? Why do you seem to be reminding me of the past? Have you really moved on or are you just doing the lid's hole too? That you are just doing the se as how what Paul did? "

Ashy unleashed a hot slap. She didn't know where she got the courage to do that.

"Why Storm? Did I disturb you when you were silent in your life in America? Did I come to you to make you look like you made the wrong decision? I didn't. So I hope you also respect my decision to have that life without you. If you can't respect me as your brother's wife, I hope you respect me as a person! " she turned her back on him.

Storm pulled her, then he hugged her tightly. It was a struggle to get rid of him, but he did not let go of her. Instead, he tightened his grip on her even more.

"If there's one thing I regret in my life, it's that I let you hurt. That I'm not by your side when you needed me. Until now, Ash, I regret that. But I can't do anything if you feel like it that I'm bothering you. Yes, I married Girlie, but that doesn't mean I forgot everything you,about us, about our plans. We were together, but she knew that you were the only one I loved and she supported me. She asked me to look for you right away when she died. I know it's too late. " he wiped the tears from his eyes.

He slowly let go of it. He looked her in the eyes.

"Storm, we doesn't always get what we want. There are times when we choose to get hurt just to give what makes our loved ones happy. " Ashy could no longer restrain herself.

"So you'd rather hurt us,"

"Because ours is over. God knows how much I loved you and I still love you. But I will not fight for that because I know the feeling of being left behind and the feelings when the one you love chose somebody else over you. I will not let your brother feel the pain. You made me feel it. I hope you'll be happy for us and we'll be happy for you. " Ashy slipped into the hands of Storm, who was still holding her.

"I'm not saying or even asking you to love me again Ash, but hopefully, let me love you even from afar. Let me take care of you as a friend. At least I can make up for my shortcomings with you."

"You don't have to do anything to make up for it, Storm. Simply avoiding and getting away from me is enough." That's all, and she walked away from him.

Her heart almost broke as she walked away. She didn't even notice the cars stopping in front of her to ask if she would took ride.

She even beat the drug users that day due to her numbness.

Until ahe just stopped and got in the car.

As she made her way home, she couldn't help but sigh. Not because she hurt Storm, but because she was able to deny how she felt, she made to lie again.

She was able to do something she had never even dreamed of. She could forget how she felt for Storm just so she wouldn't hurt Paul.

When she arrived at their house, Jem approach her immediately.

"Ash," she said, she didn't mind how she ignored her and let her feel like she's not around.

"Ash, please talk to me. Is my sin so serious that you can't even forgive me like that?" she held her in her hand.

"Why me? Did I do something wrong to you, Jem? Did I do something you didn't like? What was my fault and did you conspire with him to put me in that place? Did you ever think about what I felt while I'm with him? "Tears welled up in her eyes as she looked at her friend.

"Why that you seems to look hurt so much, Ash? Did you find anything there that you regret so much? " its question without taking her eyes off her.

"Because I hurt Paul. I gave him reason not to trust me again. Because of what happened, I don't know if he should still trust me. Because of what happened, I don't know if our wedding will happen. You're aware that I don't want to hurt him, but did you think about that?"

"Is that the reason Ash? Because that's the superficial reason, you insist, that is what you always believe."

"As if you know better how I feel." She pointed to her chest so that the friend could feel the pain she was feeling even more.

"Because you found out that Storm never gave you up." emotional in Jem's response.

She ignored her. She took her gaze away from her friend.

"You better leave Jem. I'll leave you alone, " she said as an excuse.

"Because it's true, isn't it? Because when you got there, you saw how much he valued you. You saw in that place all the dreams the two of you made that he fulfilled alone. He fulfilled it alone because he thought you would come back. While you have eaten by your anger at the thought that he cheated on you. He is busy doing things that will make you happy. You saw everything, from the plant to the design of the house you built. You were hurt because you knew you were the one who let go. " Jem exclaimed as if she's in pain knowing how much her friend failed.

"Go away Jem. If anything I saw there, I'm not part of that place. He built it himself. He built it without me. I hope you don't insist on things that aren't really going there, "she replied sharply to her friend. She couldn't handle what she would say next, so she decided to just drive her home.

"I hope you made the right decision, Ash. I'm sorry if I failed. I'm sorry if I haven't been consistent in my support for you and Paul. You know how much I like him for you. But when I found out Storm's side I felt the pain. Forgive me. But hopefully, the time will come when you will learn to accept what your heart really says. And hopefully when that day comes, it's not too late." That's all and she turned her back on her.

She was just sitting on the sofa when she saw that her friend had left. She touched her chest because she couldn't barely breathe. She looked at the ceiling to stop the tears from wanting to escape her eyes.

She cried and cried until she felt her tears were gone.

Later, she saw her mom carrying a glass of water.

"You drink. With every drop of water that comes out of your body, you have to replace it to get it back to normal and be normal." Her mom was serious as she handed her a glass of water.

"Thank you mom," she said, slowly wiping the tears from her cheeks.

It doesn't spill anymore.

"Does it hurt?" is a meaningful question from her.

"It does,it does because Paul is important to me. It does because I don't want him to feel the pain I'm feeling. I know it's not easy, but I'll choose to get hurt rather than hurt others." She obviously prevents tears from falling in her eyes.

"Have you forgotten your dad's instruction to you? That you always choose to be happy. You always choose the things that will make you happy because that's what you will lean on whenever you are sad. Why now it seems like that is no longer the path to follow, Ash? " Her mom touched her face to lift it and she could see it in the eye.

"Its not all the time that personal happiness should be chosen. Sometimes there are things that have to be sacrificed to make others happy. There are people who have to be hurt to protect the hearts of others. That's what I will do because I know that's the right thing to do. " she closed her eyes and leaned on her mother's shoulder.

The lady did not speak again. She knew that the child was very sick that day and she did not want to add more. Hopefully, but she needs to know the truth.

"Ash, I wanted to say this because it might help you decide. The day we got home, Storm came to our house. But I didn't tell you because I was afraid of losing you, I was thinking then that he might taken you away from us. I was approached by Her mother, she told me taht you would not be happy with her son. So even though I knew you were hurting too much, I hide it from you. Not because I disliked Storm, but because I was worried about what you'd be in.Forgive me Ash. " Her mom looked down while holding her hands.

The more Ashy cried, the more it became clearer to her what had happened. She knew she couldn't bring it all back. She could no longer undo what had happened.

"That's over. No matter what happened then, it doesn't matter if I get mad,it will no longer help. I won't look back. I won't look at the things that hurt me. I can't do anything about the things that are done. " she gentle reply to her mother.

"You can't undo what has happened, but you can still do something in the future," the mother said simply but meaningfully.