Chapter 16: Chapter 16

015

Put a smile upon my face

"Oh, what is my rebellious sister doing in our hospital?"

My bitch sister, Gwen, emphasized the word our hospital as she stared at me from head to toe. She flipped her hair before putting both of her hands in her white coat.

She's only a third-year medical student, but she acts like she runs the hospital. As if she's going to inherit it. I'd admit she is better than me, but she's a girl born in a Chinese family, so there is no other way she'll have the throne.

She stood in front of me, proud of her white coat, thinking I'll be jealous of what she'd become. Duh! I will never envy a girl who doesn't have her own choice. Maybe, her reason for doing that is to make our family happy, but it's a lame one for me. If your parents love you, I believe they will support you.

I know my parents love me, but they're manipulative. And, I don't want to live a life full of lies. I don't want to be someone that would kill me in the end.

"Actually, I heard you're already dead, so I paid a visit," I mocked with a sly smile. "Oops, I forgot evil doesn't die that easily," I placed my palm on my mouth and acted like I'm going to vomit. "Ugh, sorry. You smell like dead bodies, feel like I'm gonna puke."

"How dare you!" She raised her hand and was about to slap me when a baritone voice stopped her - both of us.

"What are you doing?" His voice was calm yet authoritative. "If you want to fight, do it outside my hospital."

I turned to my father. He seriously looked at me, waiting for me to say something. Maybe he was expecting a apology. Or maybe, he already knew that he's not going to get it.

"I'm quite shocked you're standing in the place you promised not to set foot again," he smirked.

"She must want to go back because--"

"I am not referring to you, Gwenleah!" Dad glared at her.

I laughed in my mind. If there's one person Gwen can't talk back, it's my father. I felt satisfied staring at her expression right now. Serves her right!

"I'm not here as your daughter. I'm here for Zee, so if you have an ounce of care for me, let me stay here for my best friend." I bowed down before walking through him.

I was halfway when he called me, "Gabriella."

I stopped without turning to him.

"Zee's at the ICU. She's brain dead, but rest assured we did our best to save her. You just have to wait for her to wake up if she still has the will to."

I tried to ignore my tears as I ran to the ICU. My hands were shaking, and my legs were numb as I saw Zee lying on a hospital bed.

I closed my eyes and let my tears flow. I clutched my chest and sobbed silently. I know Zee is still in there even though she's in comatose, so I don't want her to hear me cry.

Zee Zamora has been my best friend since the first grade. She was with me for all these years. Through the happiest and the saddest happenings in my life, she was there. And, I can say I was there for her too.

Yet, I never thought she could do this.

It once crossed my mind. To take my life, end it, but I realized it doesn't justify the end.

I still want to live and prove to them that I can be who I wanted to be if I believe in myself.

And, Zee...damn!

I hate myself for not being with Zee when she needs me the most. I should have been there for her. I should have made her feel she's not alone.

I can't blame her.

Zee's life became miserable when she was forced to marry Aae, our high school classmate. She never wanted to marry him because she loved Zack, our best friend. But, Zack needed to settle in another country for his dreams, so Zee gave up and also chose to chase her dreams.

Zee's parents allowed her then to take medicine instead of law if she would marry Aae. But, I guess you can never really teach your heart to love someone, especially if that someone was the reason why your brother died.

"Talk to her about happy things. She can hear you," Loud urged. "Give her reasons to want life."

"What would you have me say?" I sobbed. "When I can't even find one for myself," I faked a laugh. "I'm not even sure if I'm still living for myself or I am just waking up because it's the right thing to do to satisfy the universe."

Loud patted me in my head before hugging me, which made me cry hard. "C'mon, let's get you out here. Come back when you can face Zee with a smile."

He pulled me out of the ICU. He offered me bottled water that I refused to drink. I sat there, devastated. I couldn't think straight, and I felt like floating.

"Is she going to wake up?" I asked Loud.

He shook his head. "I don't know."

"Why?" I cried in frustration. "You don't know? You're a doctor! You should know!"

My scream echoed in the hallway that caught the attention of my mother. Of all the people who could see me crying right now, why does it have to be my mother?

I wiped my tears as I felt her presence towards us. Loud stood up and greeted my mother. I watched him smile at her, and I couldn't stand it.

How could he still smile at my mother, at my family? How could Loud pretend everything was okay when it isn't okay? How could he still manage to be calm in front of the family who killed his parents? Not that it's already proven, but damn, he's too great at pretending that sometimes I doubt if he still does love me.

My mother, Elarina, stared at me with no expressions at all. I felt like I was looking through a mirror as I saw myself inside her eyes. I always wonder how she managed to keep her emotions. I never learn to read her.

All I want is to see an ounce of care or hurt in her eyes when I leave home, but like today, she just stared at me like I am a mistake she made.

I felt the fang in my chest and my body breaking down when she walked away without even saying a word. I would appreciate nasty words because I'd know she still cares just like my father. But she gave me silence and that hurts the most.

"You know what," I smiled a little. "I used to have very long hair that I loved very much."

Loud softly gazed at me as I slowly combed my short hair.

"My mother used to braid my hair so I cut it short because it killed me when she chose to throw me away instead of supporting me."

---

I continued telling him stories of my childhood I never thought I wanted to share with anyone except Zee and Zack. They're my best friend, and when Zack left, Zee became distant, and I too became so far yet so close because I was too busy surviving on my own.

Loud came unexpectedly, with no warnings, with uncertainty. And, he reminded me that there's still someone out there for me if I open myself again.

He's my everglow as much as I was his. But I hope he will continue to glow because I was scared he might lose it with me by his side.

"Thanks for listening," I told him.

He smiled. "I am here, Gabby."

He caressed my cheeks before giving me a peak on my forehead.

"Do you want to grab some dinner?"

I nodded. We walked to the cafeteria. I recognized nurses and doctors who looked at me like they don't know me at all even though I used to play with them when I was a kid. I guess they don't want to be in between me and my family. Well, it doesn't matter. It's not like I'm going to stay here forever.

I hope Zee wakes up. It's her birthday today and she's lying in a hospital bed. I wonder what she's dreaming, maybe it was something beautiful that she never wants to wake up in a cruel world again.

"You need to go home," Loud insisted. "You have your class tomorrow. I'll take care of Zee and update you as soon as she wakes up."

"I want to be with her when she wakes up. I can make up for missed classes, but not with Zee's life. Okay?"

He nodded with hesitation. "Let me know if you need something. I have to stay at the emergency room."

"Thank you."

I opened the door and stopped mid-way as I smelled a familiar scent of mint. I immediately turned to Zee and noticed the pink fern flowers beside her. I forgot what it's called, but I know there's only one person who could give her that kind of flower.

"Why? What happened?" Loud asked when he saw the rush in me.

"Hi," I greeted the nurse. "Did you see someone left from that room?" I pointed at Zee's room.

"Yes," he nodded.

"What does he look like?"

"He was facing his back on me so I didn't notice, but I was sure he's wearing a pilot uniform."

I thanked him and immediately ran to the elevator. I pressed and pressed the up button and prayed I could still see Zack. Zack Zendaya is our high school best friend, though she's more than a best friend to Zee.

"Should I be jealous of the guy wearing a pilot uniform?" Loud hissed as we waited for the elevator.

"You're jealous of everything, Loud." I rolled my eyes when he laughed. "That guy, if I'm right, he's the reason why Zee never wanted to marry Aae. And, I would truly be happy if he appeared in front of me right now because I know he's the only one that could make Zee happy again."

"Ah, greatest love indeed," he smiled a little, and maybe I was imagining it when I saw his eyes sparkled as he turned to me.

I smiled too, though it instantly faded when I saw him as soon as the elevator opened.

"You gotta be kidding me," I whispered and expressed distaste when we met gaze. "What are you doing here, Aae?"

"Remind me again why I have to face him when I thought he left town, oh he left Zee, and here's what happened. If it wouldn't for Seven, the medical intern if you don't know," I sarcastically told Loud while still looking at Aae. "Zee would probably be dead by now. Well, she's barely breathing. Thanks to you."

I used to like Aae back in high school but grew to hate him after everything that happened to Zee. I know it wasn't his fault, but it is still his fault why Zee's brother died in a car accident. I don't understand why Zee's family wants her to marry this guy. I can never understand grown-ups.

"He's Zee's fiance," Loud reacted.

"Then act like one. Take care of my best friend!"

"If you're looking for Zack." Aae shook his head. "He's not here," He showed me the same flower left on Zee's bedside table. "I bought this and put some mint flavor on it because I thought she might like it when she wakes up. After all, it's Zack fragrance."

I was disappointed when I saw him wearing a pilot uniform. That confirmed it, it's not Zack. It's Aae trying to be Zack which made me hate him more because he's giving Zee false hope when she wakes up.

"Don't worry, I never intend to leave her again," Aae smiled a little before walking away.

"Make sure, then," I whispered.

"Me too," Loud said. "I'm just here for you, so don't you dare attempt to kill yourself," he warned.

"If ever I did that, don't save me. Just let me die -- ouch! Why did you hit me?"

"You're not going to die in front of me."

"Oh, okay. Let me die back then," I joked.

"I'll save you. I will always save you," he sincerely replied.

I hid my face and pretended I didn't care, yet my heart fluttered at the thought.

"Anyways, I bought you something." He opened his bag and handed me a customized hairbrush, with my name written on it. "I would love to see you grow your hair again. I'll braid it for you."

"You don't know how to braid," I replied with a smile on my face as I went inside the elevator.

"Try me." He waved as I pressed the floor button.

His bright smile was the last thing I saw before the door closed.

I wanted to go home and take a rest, but my feet told me to go on the rooftop and unwind. I was supposed to until my instinct let me pressed the 7th floor.

It's the only restricted floor inside the hospital because it's where my family resides, which means they literally lived on the 7th floor.

I spent my childhood days in our hospital, and the 7th floor once became my home. I was genuinely happy when I was a kid because I can do whatever I want to do. I used to have a lot of fun because I thought that is what life means, to have fun. But, it all changed when my parents told me to do things I never wanted to. They started comparing me to my siblings, so I need to study hard even though it's not my thing. I buried all the fun, lost all the excitement I used to have, and started living like a robot.

I know that I don't want to continue living for other people, so I ran home to become who I want to be. And I will never understand why I have to be like my family, why I have to become a doctor just because I came from a family of doctors. Is there a written rule for that? Damn!

I sighed. Why am I even here? I'm not even welcome here.

I stared at the wall for a minute. My sister, Gwen, would definitely lift her brows if she saw me standing on this floor.

"Cut it, Gab. It's not your home anymore."

I pressed the down button and was surprised to see Loud waiting. He stopped playing with his penlight when he noticed me. He looked so handsome with his scrubs. But of course, I will never tell him that.

"You look like a pineapple," I said as I pointed at his hairstyle. He tied his fringe up and even put on his Harry Potter glasses.

"Well, a sweet pineapple. Wanna taste me?" He winked and bit his lower lip.

"Yuck!" I rolled my eyes and hissed. "That's not a compliment."

"I like to take every word from your mouth as a compliment," he chuckled. "Anyways, where have you been?"

"I went to the wrong floor. Anyway, I'll go out for a while and come back."

"Okay," he nodded.

I walked, but he stopped me.

"Wait, let me ask you something."

"What?"

"I tried going to the seventh floor, but it seems like it's not working."

I raised my eyebrow and eventually laughed when I realized what he's trying to say.

"Are you asking me how to get to the seventh floor because you think there is some evidence in there to prove my family's guilt with your mother's death?"

He softly chuckled, "You know me well. So, how am I going to get inside the floor? Oh, and is it true that there's a room on the floor that can only be open with a beating heart? Like, should I kill a person to open it?"

"No, that's exaggerated. Who told you that?"

"People talk. But if not, what is it?"

"The elevator button for the seventh floor was programmed to only work with the right fingerprint," I explained. I was even surprised they didn't remove my fingerprint, or maybe they just don't care because they know that I will never go in there again.

"So, I have to cut my fingers and open a heart?" he seriously said like he had already planned on doing it if I said yes.

"You seriously want to go to the seventh floor?"

He nodded. "Yes, so tell me how to get there the most possible way. I don't want to kill your family."

"Are you talking about my brother's playroom?" I asked. As far as I can remember, it was the only room that is programmed to open with a heart.

My brother is very obsessed with the heart, so he put a device on the door that will scan your whole body, particularly the heart. I don't know how to explain it. All I know is that it opens when I stand in front of the door and doesn't open when Gwenleah does it. That's my biggest flex when I was a kid, oh even until now because I know that's the only thing my bitch sister cannot get from my favorite brother, Gabriel.

"It's the only room with that kind of device?" he wowed and slowly nodded. "I see."

"What do you mean?"

"If you are going to choose between me and Gabriel, who will you choose?"

"Why do I have to choose?" I lifted my brows. "What are you trying to say?"

"Just choose."

I looked at him. He was waiting for me to say a thing, or more like expecting me to choose him.

"I will always choose my happiness over anything," I sincerely replied.

Though, I never really know what happiness means. I just know how to be sad, and when I'm not feeling blue, that's the time I thought maybe this is what happiness means.

And, I think I don't need so much happiness. Maybe, just some light to brighten my path.

"Am I making you happy?"

"No." I quickly replied and added with a smile, "You make me glow, and I think that's more beautiful. So, continue to be my everglow, Lauyton."