Chapter 43: Chapter 43

Naina's POV

"You are again late today,” I said as he closed the door behind him.

He looks just like him and whenever I see him he reminds me of him.

"Sorry I am late,” he said as he gave me a rose.

"Thank you,” I said looking at the rose which bought back many memories.

"So is there something special that you gave me such a beautiful rose?" I asked as he sat on the mat.

"I just felt like giving it to you,” he said as he pulled out the drawing copy from his bag.

"So what will we do today?" he asked.

"Today I will teach you to draw a puppy." I said and there was a big smile on Avik's face.

I draw a puppy and gave the copy to him and ask him to try the drawing.

After few minutes the doorbell rang and I saw a woman and a young girl and as she looked at me she hid behind the woman.

"Hello. I am Neha and she is my daughter Richa. She is six years old and I think it will be good for her if she learns drawing from now on. I mean at least the basics.."

"Please come inside and then we will talk,” I cut her off as I greeted her excitedly and they came inside but Richa was still hiding behind her Mom.

How cute!

I gave her all the information and asked her to join from tomorrow as Neha pulled Richa in front of her.

"Hi. Richa. I am Naina,” I said as I knelt in front of her and gave her my hand and slowly she shook it.

Then I stood up and gave information to Neha and asked her where she stays.

"You live almost two hours away from here. Who gave you my address?" I asked.

"I have a car so it's no problem and I will bring her tomorrow,” she said and left without answering my question.

The day I started this class few children from my area came but for the last few days everyone staying far from my house is coming.

No way I am so popular in just one month.

Who is giving information about 'Veer drawing class ' ?

"Madam,” Avik called me and I went to see that and a smile came on my face as the puppy was not looking like a puppy but some weird animal.

"Wow...Avik you are improving but you can do better than it,” I said and he nodded in a yes.

"Madam I love puppies,” he said and I smiled.

"I know,” I said and drew a puppy and asked him to trace on it and few student came and sat on the mat.

There were almost fifteen students now.

I never thought that I would teach even one person but now I have fifteen students and it’s all because of him.

If he has not motivated me I have not even thought of teaching drawing.

He made me realize about my talent and how I should share it with others and make it a profession.

If only I could share this news with him.

If only I could hug him tightly and thank him for motivating me.

If only I could tell him how much I love him.

But, he wanted a divorce and I know he is happy without his stupid wife.

"Madam, is this okay?" Tia’s voice pulled me out of my thoughts and I checked her drawing and corrected it and asked her to draw it one more time.

My mobile rang and I saw that his Mom was calling me.

From the day I left his house Mom is calling me every other day but I had not picked her call because I knew she came to know about everything and was calling me to ask why I hurt Ranveer and I don’t know what to answer her.

I really wanted to talk to her and ask her apology and tell her how much I love Ranveer and I am sorry but I don’t have the courage to face another's person's hate after Ranveer.

"Madam, is this okay?" Shivani asked me as she showed me the drawing pulling me out of my thoughts.

She also stays almost two hours away from my house.

I don’t know how her Mom knew about my class.

I asked her but she avoided the question.

After almost an hour I checked everyone's drawing and gave them homework to do.

It's been two month since I left his house.

Two months since I last talked with him, seen him or touched him.

"Have you kept everything in the bag?" I asked controlling my thoughts and everyone yelled 'yes' in unison making me laugh.

"Check once again I don’t want any excuse like 'I have forgotten the colors here so I couldn't finish the homework," I told them and once again everyone yelled 'no madam' at the same time and once again a small smile crept on my face looking at my students.

My students.

Thank you Ranveer.

Thank you so much.

Even though you are not with me but you are always with me, Ranveer.

I looked around the room.

I could not afford, chairs and table like other classes but my students were perfectly fine with sitting on a mat.

Till now neither them or their parent complained about it.

*****

After almost an hour everybody left.

I decided to teach one hour in the evening because in the morning everyone has their school.

Some have tuitions at evening so I decided that everybody can come any day of the week but they have to attend two classes a week and it was easier for everyone.

"So finished the class?" Dad asked as he came out of the room and went to kitchen.

When I told Dad I want to open a class here, for a second he was surprised but then he himself asked me to do what makes me happy.

"Yes. Dad I will go in my room,” I said and Dad nodded.

I went in my room and crossed the date on the calendar.

Another day without him.

I still remember how much Dad was surprised when he saw me with suitcase in my hand, tears rolling down my cheek but he never questioned me.

As soon I went inside I cried my heart out and he hugged me and then he asked me to go in my room and freshen up.

I was thankful he never asked me anything. I went in my room and cried my heart out. For almost a month I used to get out of the room only to eat and then went in my room and lay down thinking about him and our Moments together.

Kamla aunty also came to ask me what happened but I just cried and cried hugging her.

What would I tell them ?

Everything finished because of my stupid mistake.

He hates me and wanted to leave me.

I never told anything to anyone.

I still remember the day I left his house.

Flashback

I woke up and there was a smile on my face as I saw him hugging me tightly but then I remembered the papers and I knew maybe today or in two to three days he will ask me to sign the papers.

"Naina, I love you,” I always wanted it to be these words coming from his mouth.

"You are the most precious jewel I have,” he once said.

I only want to remember the beautiful things he said to me. Yes in the past few days his words have hurted me a lot but I’ts better to kill myself than to hear him saying ‘Naina I dont want to live with you. Sign the divorce paper and get out of my life.’

I never want to hear those things coming from his mouth so I decided to leave him before he could say anything.

I had already packed everything. I folded his clothes and kept on chair,got ready and decided to write a letter before signing the paper.

End of flashback.

*****

A knock on the door pulled me out of the bitter memories.

"Dinner is ready,” Dad called and I went outside and we silently had our dinner.

"I am glad you stopped drinking,” I said.

"Trust me it is not easy. Every moment I want to go out and drink but then I remember how much drinking cost us and control myself,” he said and I nodded in a yes.

I went to wash my hands.

"Naina, you are not even having breakfast and you only have one roti for lunch and one for dinner. I know something happened but you should at least eat properly, right?" he said as I was washing my plate.

"Dad, I am fine,” I said and ran towards my room and laid on my bed.

Without him I don’t feel like doing anything.

Each and everything reminds me of him.

Our usual breakfast.

Having dinner together.

Talking with each other.

Sleeping in each others arms.

It's been two months since I last slept peacefully.

The day I came here, while crying my eyes out I drifted off to sleep.

I had a dream where Ranveer is asking me to sign the paper and get out from his life and I woke up and saw that it was 4 a.m. and thanked god that it was just a dream.

But from that night every night I am waking up from the same dream and is not able to fall asleep again.

Ranveer taught me what love is and he taught me what heartbreak is.

How it feels to live without the person you love the most ?

How it feels to control yourself when all you just want is to be with them ?

I know he doesn't need me and every second I make myself understand that he does not need me but my heart never understand it.

I took the picture of my Mom from the nightstand.

"Mom I wish you were here then maybe you would have stopped me from going to Sameer or making a plan with me. I wish you were here to love me, understand me and scold me whenever I was wrong. I want to lay my head in your arms and cry my heart out. Mom I need you."

Tears rolled down my cheeks and I drifted off to sleep thinking about how my mistake changed my life.

*****

Yesterday night also the same dream woke me up from my sleep at almost 3.30 a.m. and I could not get back to sleep.

I freshened up and got ready.

Looking at the copy I was drawing I remembered the painting easel he bought me.

I jerked my thoughts and decided to draw some scenery or something but I could not draw anything except pictures of Ranveer.

This is happening for the past few weeks.

I try to draw something but I cannot draw anything but when I close my eyes and think of Ranveer, automatically I start drawing him and my drawing book is full with pictures of Ranveer.

I never knew I loved him so much.

Day by day my love for him is scaring me.

The nightmares.

The painting.

I never knew how much he meant to me that I cannot do the basic things without remembering him.

I was dependent on him.

Everybody teach us to be financially independent but no one ever taught us to be emotionally independent.

I know he does not want me and still I am sitting here and thinking about him each and every Moment.

But, it’s okay I am fine.

I am fine.

Same lie I am saying for the past few weeks.

I am not fine.

I am not fine without him.

But he was not fine with me.

And if he is fine by staying away from me.

It's okay.

*****

Today after the class ended I decided to go to mall because I got my first payment and I wanted to buy a gift for Ranveer because if I opened 'Veer drawing class' the credit goes to him.

Today what I have is only because of him. I know I will never meet him but I want to buy something for him as a reminder that everything I have started is because of him.

I sat in an auto and decided to go to mall.

After almost thirty five minutes I reached the mall and decided to buy a watch for him.

After searching for some time I found a perfect watch for him.

"You called me Mom, right?" I heard a voice as I was leaving the Mom and saw Mom standing in front of me with her arms crossed over her chest.

*****