Chapter 94: Chapter 94
‘This place has no signal angel. So all the calls failed. This message will also be the same but it’s okay’
‘I fucking miss you.. Shit’
‘Julianna, I love you with my whole heart.’
‘I miss my little princess and little young master.’
……….
‘Julianna, I may not be able to come again to your life and I feel like something will happen but no matter what, be strong and raise Noel and Raylie well. I love you and both of them. You guys are my everything. I’ll try my best to come back. The situation here is really getting worse. I love you. If I can't come back, don’t be upset just forget me and move on. I know you love me and you will never give my place in your heart to anyone. Don’t do stupid things. Take care of every business and I’m giving my everything to you. I love you with my everything. Take care angel. Tell Noel and Raylie that daddy loves them so much. I really missed you for three months and I feel like I’m dying without hugging you and having you in my arms. Love you.. Stay safe’
I finished the last message he had for me and he had written it the day before yesterday. I clutched the phone tightly and hugged it so tightly as tears welled in my eyes. He even wrote those things for me while knowing that there’s no signal.
“Ryan why are you giving me a hard time? I didn’t do anything wrong to deserve this pain. Just why?”
“You’re an asshole” I knew he couldn’t hear but at least I wanted to release my anger. I’m really furious at him. I cried, I cried as much as I wanted, I just wanted to release the pain in my heart and the pain of losing him but my cries didn’t even ease my pain.
With all those memories I had with him, it became even harder for me. How could he ask me to move on? How can he say that forget him after everything? I had to stop him that day. Why didn’t I just let him go? How am I supposed to live without him?
“Ryan.. you bastard. I hate you for doing this to me.” I wiped my tears and entered the washroom. As I entered the washroom my mind recalled how we stayed here together and how we showered together but now everything is gone and my whole life has become empty.
“Please… come.. Back Ryan.. I can’t..” I looked at my own self through the mirror and saw the same way I saw me six years ago after finding Noah’s was gone. Why does everything happen to me?
I wiped my tears and grabbed a shower quickly as I changed into new clothes and went downstairs.
“Marianna..” As soon as I went downstairs I heard Gwen’s voice. She looked at me with an extremely sad expression then she slowly walked towards me and hugged me. I broke into tears again as she hugged me. How am I going to bear this pain alone? How can I take care of my children without him?
“Why? I.. asked him not.. to go…. See what happened now” I spoke with my shaking voice and Gwen patted my back as if she was trying to comfort me.
“I don’t know how to comfort you Mari. I just don’t know.” I heard her saying and I broke the hug and looked at her.
“I want to see where he got shot. I want to go to him. They said he fell down from a cliff. I want to see” She looked at me with a shocked face and then shook her head.
“You can’t go there. That place is so dangerous. He went on a mission to the north forest. Mark told me this and Marianna you can’t go there. You’re a woman so never” She said with a strict voice.
“But I want him back… please… How can I live without him, Gwen? He was always there for me and I’m simply depending on him” I said as I looked at her. She looked down and let out a sorrowful sigh.
“Mark will send his men to check on him.” I nodded at her and wiped my tears. I just couldn’t understand what to say or do.
“Take a rest. I’ll take care of Noel and Raylie.” She caressed my hair and said but I shook my head.
“If I take a rest, it will hurt more because of memories” I smiled at her as she nodded at me with an understanding expression. I looked at the time and found it was already four in the evening. I’m just missing everything.
“Where’s Myles and Milisha?” I asked her because I didn’t see them with her.
“Playing with Noel and Raylie” I nodded at her and sat on the sofa. My head started to hurt and I rubbed my forehead. I have no idea why this happened but the only thing I gained was limitless pain. Not only physically but also mentally. Ryan.. you caused everything.
“Madam, we got a call from the army and they said they still couldn’t find the master's body. They said they searched for him all over the river but still couldn’t find. They guess his body was taken by wolves” What? Wolves? How could they? After taking him away from me they did not even let him die and now they are telling his body was taken away by wolves. He didn’t deserve that. What the hell?
“I want to talk to them. Dial their number” I waited as I watched uncle Haden dial the number. Then he passed the phone to me. My blood was boiling and I wanted to kill all of them who took Ryan for that bloody mission while knowing he’s a father of two small kids.
“Hello, madam” I heard a man’s voice and because of his voice, I felt even more angry.
“You better find him and bring him to me. You guys came and took him away from me while I was crying not to and now you’re telling me you can’t find his body. What the hell was that? He doesn’t deserve to be eaten by wolves. You better find him and I won’t believe he’s dead until I saw him dead from my own eyes. FUCKING FIND HIM AND I DON’T GIVE A DAMN ABOUT ANYTHING.” I shouted at him because of my fury and hung up the call.
“He’s alive. I know it. He promised me that he would come back” I covered my face with my palms and cried. I believe he’ll be alive.