Chapter 21: Chapter 21

I returned to my apartment feeling more drained than I had wished. Weekend’s event had started to come back full force. Melba hadn’t been much help along the way when I dropped her off. She kept telling me about multiple partners, how I could compare them, and which one would be the better for me. But thinking about it I knew I could never want anyone more than I would Diego. He had opened something up on me and that was something I knew I just couldn’t live without. Thinking about it now was it all about sex? Had I truly become insatiable. Damn that word I was beginning to hate more. I was relieved to find the van gone, I didn’t want to deal with Diego anytime soon and asking him about dating other people. In truth could I allow someone else to date Diego, while he was here. I didn’t’ want him to be giving anyone else the multiple orgasms he had given me. I only wanted him to sate me and not anyone else. Diego had often asked me to trust him, would I possibly trust myself to tell him the truth. Thinking about it I decided against it. I will not tell Diego about me going out with Roger. He didn’t have to know we hadn’t agreed to be devoted to one another. It was a non-exclusive relationship. More friends with benefits, yeah that sounded right. Telling myself he would understand if he would ever find out. I took a shower and decided to go to sleep early. I wasn’t really hungry it was more of sleep that ached in my belly and something else. I just told my body not tonight. I had drifted into sleep and then I heard him call my name. “Please Fio, help me. I didn’t do any of the things that they are accusing me of. I didn’t kill anyone. You know me.” I was behind the bars looking at his sullen eyes and how I wish I could hug him and try to tell him I did believe him. My dream drifted into something else. The motorcycle we had once ridden so many times. I was younger than fifteen at that time and I trusted him because he was older than I was. I had to I had known him all my life. I loved him, he had been more to me than my sister’s son. I trusted him so much. We were carefree in not caring where we went. I could feel the wind in my hair blowing back and the speed of the bike, but something was defiantly wrong. The motorcycle became to sway and as I looked to see there was no driver in front of me. I had been holding on to nothing. The motorcycle was beginning to lose control. I started to scream but nothing came out and then I heard the doorbell so far away and then the increase of knocking. I woke up with a jolt.

I stood up and realized there was someone at my door and very relentless trying to get my attention. I didn’t bother to straighten out my hair or bothered about my sleepwear. I looked out of the peephole to see who was at the door. “Fio” I heard someone say. I turned on the porch light and saw that it was my neighbor Fred. I opened the door slightly. “Yes, Fred is there a problem?” I asked him. “Oh God, Fio I didn’t know you would be asleep already.” He looked at his watch. “It’s barely 6:00 in the evening.” “I was just tired with the weekend’s event that’s all.. so how can I help you?” I asked him. I hadn’t noticed that he was carrying something in his hands. It looked like take-out food. “I was just wondering if you would like to share some supper with me. I bought a bit more than I figured and well, I didn’t want it to go to waste. At that point, I wanted to go back to bed but the dream still lingering in my mind. I didn’t want it to continue and since I had skipped eating dinner the smell of the food made me hungry. I looked at him and realized he was looking not staring at me. I hadn’t remembered I was with a t-shirt and underwear only and the light from the kitchen well you can just imagine at least he could. I opened my door wide and offered him to come in. Please take it to the kitchen I just have to put something on. I went back into my room.

When I walked out with something more suitable to wear and not exposing myself I was overtaken by the aroma of the delicious smell of brisket and barbeque. “I hope you like Rudy’s Barbeque.” “Are you kidding, I love it.” “Great, because I brought plenty.” He said. I grabbed a couple of cokes from the fridge and some extra napkins along with plates. Fred turned out to be different than I had imagined. He was not at all the stuck-up, coincident person he shown to be, he was more laid back, carefree and fun to talk to. We spoke about different things in our lives, he mostly spoke about cases he had worked for. I learned he was not from Laredo, but from Wyoming. His only living relative Aunt was living with her and when she needed help he volunteered to help her out. I was moved by that jester. I was so overcome with one case in particular about a man who lost his land because of the inconsistency of land surveying done poorly. I never figured that could happen but here in Laredo, many unresolved cases ended pretty much the same he had to explain, honest hard-working people always lose at the end. I already knew that was true, but I didn’t bother to say it out loud. “Thank you for dinner.” I said to him. “I hadn’t thought about eating, I was very tired.” I said to him. “Those kids a handful?” he asked. “No, they are fine, it’s just I had a hard weekend.” I said. “I noticed that we have some crew members from the downtown area staying here as well.” “I guess the story isn’t dying out like we had hoped, well at least in a political view, that is.” He said. “What do you mean?” I asked. “Think about it Fiorella our economy is not getting any better with what the drug war spillover at the downtown area. You know there was talk, but no one would have thought it would happen.” “So, Fred how many people died. Do you know? There have been rumors and well sometimes newspapers don’t report all the facts.” “Between us Fiorella, we lost a couple of men, not as much thank God. The news about the spillover traveled quickly through an informant and well they were able to dispatch enough police, custom, and border patrol personnel to handle the situation until the military was called in, but you know the military wouldn’t even budge until it was evident that it was going to happen. We could have saved some lives if they had taken the threat seriously. I remember hearing about it, it was scary as hell. We were having court when they interrupted and asked the judge to stop all procession of the hearing and make an immediate evacuation of the facility. They had wanted us to be in lockdown but they figured that the safest place to be was away from the federal courts since they are mostly a target. “Yeah, that was when we got the call to inform parents to pick up the students. We had no idea what was happening until we heard a parent come and tell us that trucks and guns were cited near “Parque Vivero” across the border and heading to the bridge. “ My friends and I were here when it started, we were glued to the television station. Yeah, CNN was already here, they had been covering border safety issues when it all went out of control.” He added. “But what did happen, I have been trying to figure how it all started.” I asked him. “Well, the bridge was immediately closed when they heard about the convoy of trucks with weapons. They had begun to barricade bridge I and then Juarez-Lincon Bridge II. Columbia and World Trade Bridge were already closed up. They already had been given the tip. One of my friends who is a customs agent let me know detail by detail. He said he was scared. He had never feared for his life, but he was also excited about everything that was going on. The first thing that happened was that the narco trafficos sent out a car with explosives to break away the barricade. “Which bridge did this happen to first?” “They targeted Bridge I-The Gateway to Americas, I figure since it was the oldest bridge and easier to hide in all the buildings. I don’t know and he didn’t tell me why?” “Your guess is as good as anyone’s, Fiorella.” “Then what else did your agent friend say.” “Well, he went to tell me that gunfire started right after exploded from there. Unfortunately, they were not ready for the next thing to come.” He paused and took a sip of his coke. I looked anxiously at him waiting for the next detail. “The make-shift tank. It began to fire piercing bullets and things started to explode in charades around everyone. All agents scattered for cover but the impact of the bullets pushed them back farther than they wanted to go. “Why did they do this?” Do you know?” He looked at me for a brief second not wanting to tell me, but I don’t know what he saw in me. “We had one of the bosses in our federal court. He was to be in a trial that day.” I guess they figured they could get him out. He was a bad man.” “Was?” I asked him. “I can’t give you any more details than what I am telling you, Fiorella, for safety reasons.” “Oh, I get it.” I didn’t want to know anymore the sight of everyone running around trying to avoid getting hit or killed made my stomach curl. “You know it all started around five years ago.” I said to him standing up and begun to clean up. He followed suit. I handed him a trash bag and he began to dispose of the things. “How do you know? Fiorella.” “You can call me Fio, everyone else does.” I said to him. “Okay, Fio but I like to call you Fiorella it sounds a lot like a flower.” He said. “Well if you must know my name means flower it’s Italian.” I said. “Are you from Italy?” he asked. I started to laugh, “no but my mother read an article, saw the name and she loved it, and eventually, I got stuck with it.” “Well, you are beautiful as a flower.” Fred got closer towards me. I was stunned by his action. I didn’t back away. If I wanted to become dominant I needed men to know that I was in charge, but then I felt if I did this he would think me cheap, so I side-tracked him and went towards the table and picked up the soda cans to throw away. “Thank you for telling me I am beautiful.” I said to him a bit more shyly. “And to answer your question about how I know, actually I don’t know but I know that from an incident that happened across the border five years ago everything else started to turn to shit.” I said to him shrugging my shoulders. “What kind of incident?” he asked. “One that I shouldn’t have brought up and uncomfortable to talk about.” I told him. He didn’t bother asking anymore. He looked at his watch. “Oh, Grap Fiorella, I am sorry I didn’t mean to keep you up late.” “How late is it?” I asked as I went directly to him and looked at his watch. He didn’t say anything and I hadn’t realized it but I was close to him now, I looked up to see his face. He was handsome, tanned face for being in the heat weather of Laredo. He had a deeper color of sandy brown hair and blue eyes. He smelled good of some kind of cologne. He took my face into his hands and lifted it to meet his. I felt myself wanting this to happen, but I remembered I already had a friend with benefits and this one lived close by. I contemplating how to perceive. Should I allow it to happen, could I possibly kiss him. The bell of my door saved me from that decision. “Excuse me,” I said to him. I opened the door to find Diego standing at the door.