Chapter 53: Chapter 53

She wished she could believe that he wanted her as much as she wanted him. She wished she could believe the words coming out of Lily's mouth. It's so believable especially knowing that she's his sister. Perhaps he told Lily that he still had feelings for her. Or maybe she heard him admitting that.

Alice disregards this thoughts but it's so hard to especially seeing him walking towards them now. He's looking at her while he approaches them. He isn't smiling and he wasn't frowning either. His face was just relaxed—it's the same look he gives her whenever she was blabbering something to and he was giving her listening ears.

Miley and Lily both got to their feet when they noticed him. Alice doesn't even though she knows they weren't supposed to be here.

He's frowning now but he wasn't looking at Alice anymore. His eyes were now on his sister while she tried to man up and show him she wasn't afraid of him.

"What the hell are you guys doing here? Do you have any idea how dangerous it is out here?"

Alice rolled her eyes as she turned away. Since when did he care about what they do. Or maybe because this was the first time his sister was hanging out outside their home when Alice drew her out to join her on the rock, by the lake.

"We were just getting some fresh air. Doesn't seem dangerous to me here," Lily said casually as she waves her hand around the woods.

Alice hugged her knees to her chest as she tried to suppress her smile. She loved Lily’s reply to him.

"It is not safe because I said so! Back your things and go home. You could enjoy as much air as you want in Scuris or Umbris pack. You have plenty of space in both packs."

Lily groans, holding Miley's hand to leave. She did that to give them space even if they didn't have the intention to speak.

Alice was still on top of the rock, her legs to her chest as she faced forward—reminiscing about him while he stood few feet away from her.

It's so absurd how a year and a half ago she was shouting at the top of her lungs about how she hates him and she'd never take him as her mate. It's crazy how a small gesture could change your mind so easily. It's as if they changed positions in this—her with the love and him with the... hatred? She can't even tell how he feels about her anymore.

"You shouldn't be here, Alice. It's not safe, especially for you."

Especially for her?

She looks at him with a quizzical look but it's obvious he wasn't going to feed her curiosity. She waves it off and looks forward again.

"Since when did you care about my safety?"

"Since when I met you," he said quickly and firmly. "Even if we're not together, your safety is still one of my top priorities."

Her head turn towards him again. She'd never expected him to say those words to her. She liked them and hate them at the same time. She liked them because she was still his priorities or her safety was, she hates them because he reminded her that they weren't together.

She jumps down from the rock and approached him. Her arms were folded over her chest as she raised her head up to observe his face. His expression was always the same. He never gives out information unless he wants to. Right now, he isn't giving her anyone and it made her feel less of herself. It made her to remember her place in his life now.

She looks down on her feet—her heart was burning. Her throat was burning. Her head was burning...

He gently grabbed her head with his hands and made her to look up again. Her eyes were glassy, like she was about to tear up any moment. She swallowed hard and exhaled a deep breath.

It appeased the pain and agony.

"I'm trying to respect your decisions, Alice. But you keep giving me false hope and mixed signals."

She wanted to take her eyes off him but it was hard to when he was holding her head. His hands moved down to her cheeks to get a better hold of her face and more difficult angle for her to duck her head.

"How did we get into this mess?"

Her question somewhat confused him rather than annoy him. If he could remember, she wanted out of the relationship. She rejected him and pushed him away. He still went after her but she made things clear that she didn't want him anymore. Why was she dragging him down in her mud of mess?

He doesn't want to blame things on her so he asked her to go but she doesn't. She wrapped her arms around his torso, making him to inhale the cool air swiftly. His body was warm—she missed that about him.

She slowly laid her head on his chest with a gentle sigh. This feels like him—this is her home—this is where she wants to be because she belongs here.

"I fucked things up between us," she whispered.

Dominic just stood there without making any move. It was hard to believe what Alice was doing now. He was afraid to fall for this trap or whatever she was trying to do.

"I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry..." she kept repeating.

He shakes his head and wrenched her arms off his body. He took few steps back, clearing his throat. "I'll walk you home. It's getting dark," he said casually as if he doesn't have a clue of what she was trying to do.

She stares at him briefly before she swallowed the hard pill of reality and nodded. It's even more hard to believe Lily's words now after what just happened. She felt revolted by herself for what she just did.

This is the second time he was pushing her away. She deserves it though, because she had done it to him a million times and he didn't give up on her until he had enough of her humiliation.

She was not going to give up on him also until she's had enough of his rejection.

**

If there was a way she could have his thoughts erased from her head, she would've done that ever since she'd noticed he wasn't after her anymore. But his thoughts were the last thing she'd trade for this world—especially that sweet and good memories.

Yesterday evening he walked her home and watched until he was sure she was inside before he left. She watched him left and that was the only thing she could do—watch him. Because it's the only thing he wants her to do.

He doesn't want her to touch him, he doesn't want her to talk about them, he doesn't even want her to look him in the eye.

She's not going to stop until she eventually falls out of love but that's impossible.

She was out here again but she was alone. Lily didn't visit today and Miley was helping her mother at home.

She was basically alone today and she liked that she was. She was left with her thoughts—thoughts of Dominic.

"Alice?"

Her heart jumps in her throat as she falls off the rock.

"Oh God," he gasped, helping her up. "I didn't mean to scare you."

She huffs, snatching her hand away from him. She dusts her palms together and aggressively brushed the locks of hair off her face.

"I'm sorry," he said sincerely.

She sighed, feeling remorseful for exposing her anger because of his presence. "Never thought I'd see you again," she said, scanning him from head to toe. He'd changed... a lot.

She hasn't seen him since in New York when he told her he was coming back to Alaska. He had lost weight. His skin looks pale. His lips were dry and he had dark circles around his eyes.

Her heart skips a beat because if she's the reason why he's looking this way—she's not going to forgive her for hurting him.

"I thought I'd never see you again. When did you come back?"

His voice was a little bit deeper and lower than usual. It's as if he's afraid to speak out loud.

His eyes darts around occasionally and it makes her nervous to be with him. "Should I be worried?" She asked him, scanning the woods. She doesn't see anything or anyone.

He returns his eyes to her face and smiled. "No. No, not at all." His eyes were roaming around her body down.

She's uncomfortable. Everything about him now makes her uncomfortable. She wants to leave but it would be rude if she did without any reason.

Maybe she should've listened to Dominic when he told her it wasn't safe out here, especially for her.

"You're back..." he said casually as if he didn't just do the most turn off thing that scared her.

"I came back a couple of weeks ago," she said plainly. She doesn't have to give him details. He doesn't need to know why she's back.

"When are you going back?" He asked, shoving his hands in his pockets.

She tilts her head and sent him a swift distrustful look. "I'm not sure," she mumbled but he heard her.

"You're not sure when or you're not sure if?"

If it wasn't Aaron asking her this question, she would've considered it as too personal. But what the heck, he's being too nosy.

"I'm not sure when," she retorted as she cross her arms over her chest.

He sighs heavily and nodded. "You're really going back?" He asked, slowly closing the gap between them.

She stares at him for barely two seconds and looked down. He wasn't touching her but he was close enough for her to hear his heavy breathing. He hooks his finger on her chin and made her to look up at him.

His round brown tired eyes, beautiful and haunting, yet full of sadness and pain. She caused it. Her heart cracks at their sight.

She shouldn't feel guilty about this. She isn't supposed to feel this way. Because he'd done the same thing to her, only worse. He pushed her away when she needed him the most. She went over her father's words just to be with him. She got her father to accept him just for him to humiliate her and make her look like a fool that she is.

"I can't stop thinking about you. I can't stop thinking about us. We used to be so good together. How did we end up in this mess?"

His question makes her to wince like she was in pain because she asked Dominic the same question when she was the one that put them in that mess. She's at fault—she left him.

Aaron did the same thing and when it was a little bit late, he comes back looking for her.

She shakes her head, appreciating Dominic for tolerating her for asking such ridiculous question. It's as if she's the female version of Aaron for Dominic.

"Maybe we aren't just meant to be..."

"But you're not even giving us a chance, Alice," he interrupts, placing his hands on her waist. She doesn't like that he just did that.

She furrows her brow and looked up at him. "I thought we've been through this before. You're just forcing things now. I don't want to be with you anymore." She didn't mean to say it in a harsh way but he's pushing her a little bit further.

His eyes seethe with rage and he tightens his grip on my arms. Her heart drops to her stomach as she wrench free of his hold. She take few steps back as he turned around. He brings the palm of his hand to the back of his neck as squeezes it. He takes a deep breath and exhaled it to calm the rage.

He turns around after that and settle his eyes on her. "Are you back together with him?"

She doesn't want to feed him what he wants anymore but Aaron still has some power over her. She shakes her head. "No."

He heaved a sigh of relief and it kind of annoys her because now it's going to give him more hope.

"You're thinking of getting back together with him?"

Alice smacks her lips and rolled her eyes. "What's up with you and Dominic? Why are you so worried about him? What if I'm already with someone? Why are you getting so worked up about him?" This wasn't only because of her. It has to be something else.

The mention of his name makes his spine stiffen. He hates it when she calls his name. It's like a knife being stabbed to his chest. It wasn't even about her being with him. Dominic being alive is threat to hum.

"Are you seeing someone then?"

She scoffed, shaking her head in disbelief. She has come to realize that Aaron is selfish and being ridiculous. If she wastes any more time here, she might lose herself.

She backs away from him. "I have to go."

He shakes his head, walking towards her. "Don't leave yet. Just a couple more minutes," he pleaded, trying to get a hold of her.

"Don't you dare come near me, Aaron," she yelled. "If you love me just... don't come after me." She immediately turned around and walked away.

He watched her retreating back, cursing under his breath and kicking the air. He almost had her—almost. If she had waited just a couple of minutes.

Alice reached their gates in a haste as if he wa following her. She encounters with Dominic standing by the gates and it seemed like he was waiting for someone.

His eyes grew wide with concern the moment he spotted her coming. It was the second time she was getting a reaction off of him.

He approached her before she could. "What happened? Why are you out here? I told you it's dangerous out here for you," he said, gripping on her shoulders and observing her whole body.

That simple physical gesture sends a current through her, making it hard to focus without being too obvious that she gets giddy around him.

"It's okay, I'm fine. I wasn't hurt," she mumbled, her heart beating swiftly for completely no reason. Probably because Dominic was holding her and his face was so close to hers despite how taller he was.

His eyes eased up, so as his grip on her shoulders. He restrain himself and let go of her completely as though he remembered something.

She hates that he just shifted away from her.

"What happened? You seemed really scared," he said worriedly.

She smiled a little, lowering her head. "I was just... by the lake. I'm fine, nothing happened."

His eyebrow shoots up—she was obviously lying. She noticed the look on his face and she knew he doesn't believe her. "I could literally smell him off of you," he said, his voice laced with immense of jealousy and anger.

A huge wave of anxiety and fear rolls over me so intensely, I'm scared I might pass out. There goes her chance of getting back together with Dominic. Now he thinks she's back together with Aaron.

"It's not what you think..."

"It's none of my business what you do, Alice. I'll see you around." He doesn't waste a another second before he leaves.

Her heart cracks—it shatters completely. The pieces are falling to down to her stomach, melting down to her legs and making them weak.

"Alice? What are you doing here? Where's Dominic? He told me he was outside and we were supposed to go hunting together," Fredrick asked her, looking around his territory to spot Dominic.

Her throat was so thick with burgeoning tears, she couldn't even verbally respond to what her father said. If she doesn't leave right now, her legs would fail her and her tears would betray her.

She sucks in a huge breath and exhaled before walking into the territory.

She blames herself for whatever that's happening with her life and how her life has turned out to be.