Chapter 21: Chapter 21

It has been two days or three days—she had stopped counting at the third day so it has to be four days. It’s been four days since she last had that deep conversation with Dominic. It’s been four days since she last saw him, since she last saw Aaron…

She only had two days left until the time was due and her father was going to give her away—to Dominic. She didn’t know why she wasn’t upset about the idea anymore. Not because he told her everything she needed to clear her doubts. Aaron wasn’t willing to come meet her parents, by the looks of it. If he wanted to, he would’ve come knocking on her door by now. But it’s been four days and he hasn’t showed up. He probably won’t show up.

If only Ryan was here, he would’ve told her what to do. He would’ve given her the advice she needs and the encouragement she needs to keep going. But here she was in her room, lying in the pool of her own misery like she always did whenever she felt defeated.

If Ryan was here, maybe he’d tell her to let go of Aaron and accept Dominic as her mate. She wouldn’t get angry if he told her that—Ryan knows what’s best for her. He’d make a good choice for her. And she wasn’t going to get upset because Ryan told her to marry Dominic and he knows the best, but now she sees Dominic as a different man. She hates him less and he’s a broken man who needs that touch of affection and devotion rather than a malevolent leader that his pack members love nevertheless.

Thinking of being with Dominic now made her to feel awkward, as though she was committing a vast depravity. It felt like she was the one leaving Aaron not the other way around. What Aaron has done to her was out of the line but she didn’t feel, not even an ounce of anger or disappointment toward him. Her heart and mind were clouded with his love. Usually, when the heart is where it’s not supposed to be, the mind guides it to the right place. But for Alice, both her heart and mind were in the same place and she can’t seem to bother about being guided away from him.

Aaron is just scared and he needs her help to guide him. He’s still shocked about her identity. He wasn’t expecting her to be what she was. And maybe if Dominic didn’t show up that evening, Aaron wouldn’t have reacted the way he did and ran off. Maybe if she had explained to him and let him to process it slowly, he wouldn’t have neglected her.

She exhales, closing her eyes. Aaron loves her and he wants to be with her. He told her he’d do anything to see their love bloom. He’d do anything to spend the rest of his life with her. Those words always kept her going and made her not to have doubts about him. His eyes held the truth when he told her that. She believes him. He wouldn’t betray her.

She rubbed her two hands together, breathing in and out slowly to calm the panic. Some part of her mind wasn’t completely ill—it was telling her to let Aaron be. If he really loves, he’ll make things right and come looking for her. But the vast part of her mind told her to go after him.

She collapses on her bed, massaging her temple. She loves him so much that she may be a little too obsessed with him. He is her first love and he showed her what love was, he gave her what she didn’t have. Now she has grown fond of it and can’t control it. She can’t stay away from him even if she wanted to. She hasn’t tried staying away from him but it was going to be hard if she decides to give him breathing space.

She got to her feet and walked out of her room to the front door. No one was home at the moment. Her father was out with Miley’s father while her mother was at the bakeoff competition.

She locked the door behind her and head towards Miley’s house. The metropolis seemed busier than usual for a Thursday evening. She walked through the crowed pavements and open space before finally arriving at the front door of Miley’s house.

She rang the doorbell and as if Miley was waiting, she swings the door open. She smiled upon seeing Alice’s face. “You’re going out?” Alice asked, walking passed her into the house. She looked around the spacious living room as she inhaled the sweet scent of lavender, her favorite.

“Going to the bakeoff competition of course,” she said, fixing her hair by the mirror console.

“Yeah, that… I need your help,” Alice spoke lowly as if someone was going to hear them. Miley halted and looked at Alice. “Go on,” she said. Alice could hear the curiosity in Miley’s voice.

“It’s not something outrageous, I promise. I just need your phone. I need to call Ryan, please.” The look on Alice’s eyes made Miley sigh in defeat. She paused what she was doing and hugged Alice. “Oh,” Alice mumbled and hugged her back awkwardly.

“You have been through a lot, Alice. I can see it in your eyes that something’s bothering you. Tell me how I could help you please,” She stated and broke the hug.

“Thank you?” Alice said self-consciously. “Right now, I just need your phone. I need to speak to Ryan.”

“Sure,” Miley said and brought out her phone from her back pocket. Just go into my room, the network is better there and I saved his name as Ryanimo.” She explained while making her way to the kitchen.

Alice shook her head and made her way to Miley’s room. She wasn’t going to ask Miley why she saved his name that way.  Miley is an extraordinary girl. She does what pleases her without caring what people would think of her. Anyone’s opinion was the last thing that’s bother Miley—expect when she has something stuck in her teeth or her mascara was smeared.

With shaky hands, Alice typed in his name on Miley’s contact list. It appeared and her confidence ran out of the room. Why was she even nervous to talk to Ryan? Maybe because he has shown signs of love for her and she was literally calling him over boy problem. She felt self-conscious to only look for him only when she was having relationship troubles.

Her finger tapped on his number and it started ringing. She let out a shaky breath as she felt like a small lump was sitting in her throat. He picked up the phone and spoke into it.

“Hello, Miley?” He sounded surprised to why she was calling him at that time. Maybe he was still at work or she doesn’t call him at all.

Alice opened her mouth to speak but suddenly lost the ability of speech. She felt a tightening in her throat and a short intake of breath. “Ryan…” she mumbled. She sniffled quietly, tears threatening to spill from her eyes.

“Alice? Wha- what happened? Are you alright?” He asked her. She could hear the panic and terror in his voice.

“Are you busy?” She asked him. A single drop of grief welled up from the corner of her eye.

“No, no I’m not. What’s wrong?” He had just got home from work and hadn’t even settled down when he received  the call from her. The hunger and tiredness have abruptly left his body upon hearing her broken voice.

“I thought I could handle everything without you here but I can’t,” she spoke, her voice quivering. Tears split and flowed down her face like a river escaping a dam.

“No, don’t said that, Alice. You’re scaring me. What happened?” He was getting more tensed with each passing minute without knowing why she was crying.

“I know you must think I’m stupid. But… it’s Aaron… I don’t know… I don’t think…” She abates. An involuntary whimper escaped her lips.

“What did he do?” He asked through gritting teeth. His pulse rising with anger. He could hear her breathing in and out, trying to calm his panic. He could also hear her speaking incoherently, probably giving herself a pep talk to stay calm and speak. His heart shatters, hearing how the innocent girl is broken. She has been through enough and this Aaron guy has done enough.

“Dad told me you had a conversation and he gave me a week to present my mate…”

“Well, actually Dominic did that. I was only there to give support. He suggests your father give you the grace to present who you love,” he explained to her.

Her breath hitched, making her to sit down without admonition. How on earth did she not know that? Why was she just finding out about this? Why didn’t Dominic tell her that he was the one that asked for that favor in her behalf?

“He is not what we thought he was, Alice. He’s a good man with good intentions,” he spoke further. It still didn’t change how she felt about him and how she felt about Aaron.

“Aaron has really changed… a lot. He’s not what he used to be, ever since he found out the truth about me,” she said. It sounded ridiculous now that she brought it up. “He’s just not… the guy I met before. I know he loves me but I don’t know what’s holding him back now. He used to be obsessed with me, fearless and have the most insane thoughts about spending the rest of our lives together. But now, he’s distant, skeptical. It feels like he’s trying to avoid me without feeling bad about it.”

Ryan was silent for a bit. She hears him breathe out and he sounded like he was going to explode with anger. Before he even spoke, she knew what he was going to say. She knew he was going to tell her to let go of him and move on. But what if that’s not what she wants? What If that’s not what he wants?

“Look, Alice, I always knew there was something off about this guy. It doesn’t feel like he’s what he says he is. Besides, he kept secrets from you also. He should be as guilty as you feel right now. You shouldn’t keep beating yourself over a boy that isn’t even ready to put effort on being with you.”

These were the words she was afraid of hearing. She wasn’t just afraid to hear it, she was also worried that she might not take the advice and use it. She also wanted to forget about him, but whenever she sees him, she inevitably falls in love with him all over again. His kind words to her were an underreckoning.

“I just feel like Dad and Dominic are the ones scaring him away.”

“If he really does love you like he claims, nothing would scare him away from what he wants. You deserve to be with someone who looks at you every single day like they’ve won the lottery and have the whole world in front of them not look at you and have doubts about you.”

“So, you’re saying I should dump him and marry Dominic instead?” She bellowed angrily; a boiling fury swelled inside of her.

He lets out a rush of air and cursed lowly. “He has already showed signs that he’s dumping you, Alice. You just need to open your eyes to see it. And I was not rutting for Dominic. I’m not on anybody’s side. I’m on your side and I want to support you and whatever decision you make. But just… let go of him,” he said to her. His voice was so warm and comforting even the stingiest of stranger would instantly calm down.

“I have to go now before Miley comes for my head,” she said, her voice sounding a little bit calm.

“Are you sure you’re going to be okay?” He asked and she nodded as though he was in front of her. “Mm-hmm,” she hummed, wiping away the tears. “Thank you, Ryan.” She cut the call after that and walked out of the room.

“Thank you for letting me use your phone, Miley,” she said and hurriedly walked to the door. She exits despite Miley calling out her name and asking her what happened.

Her mind was not itself and her heart was beating erratically. It was hard to think straight. It was hard to know what to do next. It was hard to make a decision at that kind of moment.

When she didn’t know what to do, she headed out into the woods. She didn’t stop by the rock or the waterfall Dominic took her. She didn’t stop in the unfinished building she usually stays in with Aaron when they needed more privacy.

She headed into town… not just the town. She headed to Aaron’s house. She didn’t care how far it was and how much she needed to walk. She just did because that was the only thing her mind could come up with.

She has never been to his house. She only knew where it was. She doesn’t even know how the inside looked like but it looked welcoming from the outside. She stood in front of the porch, unable to step foot on the stairs, left alone the door. She was too scared, she has never come in contact with any human but Aaron which he turned out not to be out after all. She was petrified with the thoughts of his sister or mom or even his dad answering the door instead of him.

What if they know who she was? What if they hurt her?

She breathes out, squeezing her chest and nodding her head. She set foot on the first step and before she could take the second one, the front door opens and he appeared. She looked up, her heart flipped when they locked eyes. She shook her head and took a step back. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have…”

“Hey, hey… no,” he said quickly approaching her. “I was just worried about you,” she said to him, her eyes watering with tears for no reason. He held her shoulders and bored into her eyes. “Are you okay?” She asked him.

He nods his head and looked back at the door. “You shouldn’t be here, Alice,” he said, averting his head to her face. She could see the slight of annoyance washing over his face. “I’m so glad you’re here but you shouldn’t be here. My parents are home.”

Her heart sting with pain from his words. He doesn’t want his parents to see her?

She hears the familiar voice calling him out and she knew it was his mother. She just asked who it was at the door and he told her, “No one, mom. I’ll there in a sec.”

Alice shakes her head, shrugging his hands from touching her. “You don’t want them to see me? Why?” Her voice was trembling. She bites down her lips to suppress the sob from escaping.

“Go, Alice. I’ll come see you tomorrow, I promise.” He turned around and left her there without a back glance.

Ryan was right, he was showing signs that he was dumping her. Or she was mistaken it? No, she can’t judge him for that. No, she’d wait tomorrow and he’d explain everything to her.

She turned on her heels and left—the tears gushed out anyways. She knew she wasn’t going to be able to hold the tears from cascading. She didn’t stop them from coming out. She felt less pain letting them fall freely.

She headed back to the woods but made her way to Umbris pack instead. Somehow, she wanted to see Dominic even if he wasn’t going to say a word to her. She wouldn’t mind just standing in front of him and gush her eyes out till she was numb. She doesn’t mind standing in front of him even if he was going to judge her for the choice she’d chosen for herself.