Chapter 39: Chapter 39

"His name is Jason Monroe. He turns three next month." The adoption manager says, pushing a file towards Tobias and I. The file is open and packed full of information, the papers thick and stacked on top of one another. In the corner is a small photograph of Jason and I automatically feel drawn to it. There's something about the sadness in his eyes that makes me want to take it away.

"What's his story?" Tobias says, quickly skimming over the page. There's a pause in the room and I glance up at her from under my lashes. She's sitting in her office chair with her back straight but her eyes diverted to the floor. She releases a heavy sigh before her eyes flicker back up to meet mine.

"It's a very long one. Jason came to us three months ago from his mothers house. We don't know where his biological father is despite getting in touch with him numerous times. There were suspicions that Jason was being. . . mistreated." She says, her eyes flashing with a mixed sadness and anger.

"What happened to him?" I ask softly, my heart hammering inside my chest. I can't seem to tear my eyes off the little picture attached to his file.

"He's had countless visits to A&E. Some for fractured bones, sprains, loss of consciousness. We suspect abuse but Jason won't talk to us, he won't talk to anyone. There's currently an investigation pending into the case but I'm afraid it may be going on for a while."

"Poor little man." Tobias says quietly beside me, his face set into a permanent frown.

"What is he like? His behaviour and personality?" I question, my throat drying out considerably. I can't begin to imagine what Jason has seen or experienced. A three year old boy who's been to the hospital more times than I ever have done in my entire lifetime . . . All at the hands of the people who were supposed to protect him.

"He's quiet, understandably. He doesn't socialise with any of the other kids. We try to get him involved but he always ends up in the corner of the room, on his own. He has frequent night terrors but they seem to be decreasing as time goes on. He's built a relationship with only one member of staff so he is difficult to emotionally connect with."

"Could we see more of him?" Tobias says beside me. The manager nods her head before her eyes flicker between both of us.

"It may be slightly overwhelming to take on someone like Jason. He's withdrawn, on edge most of the time and will need further help to process his trauma. Maybe you'd be interested in finding out about another child? Someone who doesn't have as many needs?"

Automatically Tobias and I look at each other. His brown eyes search mine for an answer and without saying anything, we've already made a decision.

"No, we'll stick to Jason for now."

*****

"Hey Buddy, do you want to do some colouring?" Tobias says, walking over to Jason who's sat at the kids colouring table. Tobias shuffles through some pictures before choosing one and sitting next to Jason. I'm sat a few feet away, watching and observing as Tobias gets to know him further.

Jason keeps his head down, his hand firmly wrapped around his toy cowboy. Tobias pauses before reaching forward and grabbing some colouring pens.

"Do you want to help me colour in this picture?" Tobias asks Jason quietly, pushing the paper towards him. There's no response from Jason, no reaction, no interest, nothing.

I give Tobias a reassuring smile as he looks up at me, slight worry flickering through his eyes.

"It's a picture of a cowboy." Tobias says patiently, trying his best to connect with Jason on any sort of level. For the first time, we both watch as his head lifts with interest. It's the smallest movement but a step in the right direction.

"Cowboy?" Jason says quietly.

"Yeah buddy, it's a cowboy. Look at his hat and boots. Do you want to colour him in?" Tobias says, a smile lighting up his face. I lean back against my chair, a warm feeling settling inside my chest as I watch them both.

"Okay." Jason murmurs quietly, reaching forward in slow motion to carefully lift a coloured pen from the table. He moves with such caution, almost afraid that his actions will get him in trouble.

"Hmm. I think I'm going to colour his boots with the pink pen."

"No!" Jason gasps, looking up at Tobias. They both connect eyes for the first time and Tobias laughs —

"Why not?"

"Cowboys don't wear pink." Jason says, picking up a darker colour. He hands it to Tobias carefully, his small hands shaking slightly.

“Yes, you're right. I completely forgot! Cowboys don't wear pink." Tobias says, taking it from him. The two boys sit and continue colouring in silence for the next ten minutes but those very few words spoken gives everyone in the room hope.

Jason may be quiet and withdrawn but underneath all that pain is a little boy desperate to be just that —

A little boy.

*****

"Yay Ruby! Clap your hands!" I cheer, clapping my hands and bouncing her in my lap. She giggles and gurgles, her large eyes widening in excitement. Emily laughs at us over her shoulder before continuing on with finishing up the cake.

"Is it normal to celebrate a baby turning six months old?" She asks me, licking a small piece of frosting from the tip of her fingers. I nod and shrug my shoulders —

"Who says it has to be a full year before we're allowed to eat cake? You & Jake kept this baby alive for six whole months, it's a damn miracle." I laugh. Emily bursts out laughing, nodding her head in agreement.

"Every day with this eating, sleeping and pooping monster is hard."

"You're the best parents I know." I tell her seriously. She turns around, pausing for a moment in surprise.

"Thank you." She says softly, giving me a small smile. Her brown eyes flicker over to Ruby, a baby that couldn't look more like her.

"I never thought I'd be stood here right now, raising an actual human. If I could celebrate every single day with her, I would."

In that moment, Ruby senses her mothers love and holds out her arms, wanting to be held. Emily smiles and walks forward, her eyes lighting up with nothing but pure love for her child. She takes her from me and props her up on her hip before kissing her forehead.

"Hi honey," Emily murmurs, breathing in her scent. I smile at the sight in front of me, knowing my best friend was destined to be a Mum to the amazing Ruby. The kitchen door opens and Jake and Tobias walk in followed by Ivory.

"I have balloons!" Jake says excitedly, holding them up in the air. Written across them is a number 6 and I laugh, pointing at them.

"She's six months old Jake, not six years old."

"Nowhere sold six month old balloons, can you believe that?" Jake says unhappily. Emily walks up to him, standing on her tip toes before kissing him.

"The balloons are perfect." She says, a wide smile on her face. Jake's unhappy expression immediately vanishes and he scoops Ruby and Emily into a massive bear hug, crushing the pair of them.

"I love you my Muffin and Cupcake."

Behind him, Tobias begins to retch, mimicking throwing up. Ivory laughs and shoves his arm slightly, telling him off. Once upon a time, Jake Melvin wouldn't dare call anyone his Cupcake or Muffin. . . That is until he met my best friend and had a daughter.

I've been surrounded by bad parenting my entire life which completely threw me off having children. Now that I have two of my best friends to show me it isn't all doom and gloom, I couldn't be more excited to start my own family with the man I love.

"Hey Sugar, fancy giving me some loving like that?" Tobias says, waggling his eyebrows as he walks towards me. I laugh and shake my head at him but my feet automatically move towards his outstretched arms. He wraps both arms loosely around my neck before pulling me into his chest. His hand disappears into my hair and I breathe in his warm scent, closing my eyes.

"I love you." He whispers down my ear, his voice inviting goosebumps all over my body.