Chapter 43: Chapter 43

Sophia sat facing Lennox as he placed their order, his mannerisms that of a man who was used to getting his way and having his words followed to a T. Sophia wondered why he was so closed off, why he had to raise his guards so high that it was almost impossible to see his true nature and she wondered why she was so obsessed over him. It wasn't like her to be so bothered about another human and the thought had her frowning. He suddenly turned to face her, his dark gaze probing.

"I hope my choice is to your liking".

Sophia nodded because her tongue felt twisted in her mouth and it was all because her thought had spiraled in another direction. it was eerie the way her skin crawled at the thought of Lennox treating Jenny Mark the same way he was doing to her now.

"You've been very quiet" he noted and Sophia rolled her eyes.

"We're in a restaurant, Sir Lennox. Am I supposed to run around screaming" she snarked, just because she was still pissed at him and the thought of him being with another left a bitter taste in her mouth? "Plus, you already ordered, so why are you asking for my opinion".

Lennox sat straighter, his eyes keen as he regarded her curiously. His forefinger tapped against the table before he spoke, his voice a rough whisper. "Because I wanted to know if I could guess your favorite dishes. I didn't mean to offend you".

Sophia sighed. Way to make a girl feel like a bitch. She bit her lips, her voice softer. "Your guesses were right. I'd have gotten the same thing anyway" she said and watched as a smile transformed his face. Sophia found it almost hard to take in a decent breath with the way he had her feeling just because he was smiling with his eyes, the dark coals that had always been moody twinkling in the dim setting.

Their order arrived, distracting her and giving her time to find her equilibrium. The waiter took care of everything albeit sluggishly. Sophia stared at her, noting the way she was trying her possible best to get Lennox to notice her. Sophia glared when the lady caught her gaze and she rushed off quickly, a blush spreading across her cheeks.

Sophia's glare followed her until she was out of sight, then she turned to face Lennox, flinching a little out of shock when she met his gaze.

Sophia cleared her throat, picked up the glass of wine, and took a sip, savoring the taste. It was good.

"Perfect" she murmured and he seemed to relax, then he tensed again, rubbing his forefinger on his thumb as his features became grave.

"Are you in love with Ivan?" He asked and Sophia choked on her drink. She coughed and glared at him as she dropped the wine.

"Why will I be in love with Ivan?"

Lennox avoided her gaze, his jaw locking. "You went to his room at the party, and you didn't want to leave with me when I'd tried to drag you home"

Sophia watched him, noticing how stiff his whole demeanor was, it was as if he'd purposely asked the question with the sole aim of having her admit to it. He seemed to be grabbing for a reason to drive a wedge between them.

"He said he had a surprise for me, so I followed him into the room. That was it. We've worked together for a long time and he wasn't... I didn't think he could do something like that" she explained and grabbed at the fork because her head was spinning and she needed something to hold onto.

Lennox glanced at her, his gaze still accusing. "I drove you home once when you were drunk" he stated surprising her.

Sophia blinked, trying to remember when the incident had taken place. She shook her head in confusion.

"I mean I took you to my house cause You mistook me for a cab driver" he prompted and Sophia gasped in shock as she remembered her drinking spree, and waking up the next day at Lennox's apartment.

Sophia's heart leaped Into her throat. "What about it".

"You kind of told me all about your revenge plans. So are you still pushing through with it? Is that why you allowed me to kiss you, is that why you act so nice to me. Maybe Ivan is your real boyfriend and all this is just some grand plot to get back at me".

Sophia stood up, and his gaze jerked up to her in panic. Sophia was furious. Did he really think that low of her? She'd thought that he was going to finally admit his feelings to her, and not accuse her of some grand scheme that she was plotting just to get back at him.

Sophia grabbed at the edges of the table, hating the fact that she was guilty of planning to get her revenge, but she'd already dropped it once she knew she had feelings for him. It hurt More that he still believed she had something to do with Ivan, even after she had explained that she didn't.

"You're right, I did plan to get my revenge on you at the beginning but I stopped once I knew I liked you. Everything I did was because I wanted you to be happy, even during the time that I was still plotting against you. I broke into your apartment too, yes I did, because I wanted to know who you were... I was curious about why you were so closed off. I was worried about you, and I choose to stay by your side even tho I found out about what happened to Melissa because I knew it wasn't your fault. It was not your fault Lennox" she emphasized, despite her anger, because she wanted him, needed him to stop blaming himself for tragedies he had no control over.

"Ivan was just a colleague Lennox. I had nothing to do with him and I'm tired of having to explain myself to you." She said then laughed brokenly. "You're always in my head twenty-four seven and you think I have the space to think about somebody else. I'm so stupid to care about and I hate that I can't seem to stop"

Lennox's throat worked. "You like me" he got out, his eyes panicked.

"Well I did, but not anymore you jerk. If you want to be alone for the rest of your life then good luck with that cause I'm done with this rollercoaster ride" she snapped, and trudged out of the restaurant, hot tears escaping her eyes.

Sophia reached the door when warm hands latched onto her arm, and she whirled around to face Lennox who looked almost traumatized.

"I'm sorry. Please don't go. Don't leave. You're right, I'm a jerk for treating you this way. You don't deserve to have feelings for someone like me. I'm so frustrating, I'm putting you through the same shit I've put those close to me through and yet you believe in me. You tell me that Melissa's death is not my fault but I can't help but feel guilty, I can't help feeling responsible for it because I pushed her to the edge until she couldn't take it anymore." He sucked in a breath, before pinning her with red-rimmed dark eyes.

"I should probably let you go, but I can't. I want you so much that it scares me. I'm already hurting you and we're not even together yet and my family is horrible, I don't want you to regret loving me... But I'm selfish... I don't want you to go. Please Sophia, please." He begged his voice a rough whisper. He took a deep breath, his eyes fiercely determined as he held her gaze. "I've fallen utterly and hopelessly in love with you" he confessed and Sophia inhaled sharply, staring into his eyes.

Sophia stared at him, the silence stretching as her heart thumped in her chest. She'd wanted him to confess to her, but the raw pain in his eyes and the pain In his words had her heart clenching.

Sophia glanced at the people in the restaurant, noting how their eyes were glued to them. She stared at Lennox.

"No." She gasped out, yanked her arm from his grip, and rushed out of the restaurant into the night.