Chapter 36: Chapter 36
Chapter 36: Embracing a New Life Ahead
I am on the brink of welcoming a new life. I am in a foreign country, and my only connection to my daughter is through photos and articles online. Lately, Min has become a little star, capturing the attention of many. She excels in her studies from a young age, and being Enzo Robert's daughter adds to the media's interest, turning her into an internet sensation.
Consequently, numerous articles are written about Min, praising her in the best possible light, and I am truly grateful for that. "A person's value increases when they are in the right place."
After reading these articles about Min, I secretly ponder, "If I take Min with me, she might not have the chance to experience such wonderful things. Though I don't know if Enzo is a good father, he has substantial wealth and can provide Min with the best."
Since choosing to leave my home country, I have severed ties with everyone, changing my phone and social media accounts, and even abandoning my old email address to avoid being tracked. Enzo will quickly find a good wife, and Min will accept that woman as her "mother" and forget about the inadequate and useless.
Work must go on; initially, Roy helped a lot, and things went smoothly without any obstacles. The job is progressing well, and though the income is just average, I don't have extravagant needs, so I feel content.
I find immense comfort in not being tied down by anything, no pressure, no emotional wounds, no exhaustion. I have money, a good job, supportive friends, and always find time to relax.
Here, nobody looks down on me, speaks ill of me, or hates me. I am thriving in this place. Though I am uncertain about the future, I feel that choosing to be with Roy was the right decision. I don't need money and fame from Enzo; I have given so much of my affection to him, losing myself in the process. I almost forgot that I need to love myself.
My life has been a series of breakdowns. From childhood, I faced adversity. My mother was lost due to my father's violent rage. At just fourteen, I was sent to a reform camp for transporting prohibited substances. In that camp, I was treated as less than human, a sandbag for others to abuse, powerless to resist.
The best thing that happened was getting an education, and then I met Enzo.
My childhood can be summed up in one word: "Unfortunate."
I don't know if what I'm doing is right, but I trust my choices.
...
Today is my day off, and Roy came over for dinner.
Originally, I wanted a simple dinner, but Roy suggested hotpot. Even though it's just the two of us, Roy brought so much food, which surprised me.
"With this much food, we won't be able to finish it all," I said.
Roy laughed cheerfully, carrying the pile of items in:
"Don't worry, you can use it for other meals."
I found him foolish for spending money on this nutritionally questionable food. Maybe it's because I used to struggle to afford meals, which is why I felt uneasy looking at Roy's shopping bill even though it's not my money.
"Flora, would you like some wine?" Roy asked.
Feeling unwell lately, I declined. Seeing my refusal, Roy's face fell, hurt by my rejection.
A dinner for just Roy and me, yet not having wine truly feels like a major omission.
"You haven't been feeling well lately, have you? You seem... to be gaining weight," Roy observed.
I burst into laughter:
"Do you know you shouldn't say such things to a woman? You'll make her sad."
Upon hearing this, Roy apologized. I chuckled:
"It's fine; you should feel lucky that I reminded you. If your girlfriend heard those words, she'd be quite upset."
After I said those things, which seemed like just a joke, Roy looked at me intently for a long time, making me bewildered by his gaze. I didn't know if I said something wrong and why Roy was looking at me with that expression.
"Roy... are you okay? Is there something on my face?"
Roy spoke, his voice serious and firm:
"I don't have a girlfriend and have never been married."
I was surprised to hear him say that, but what surprised me more was... why was he telling me these things? I wasn't interested in his romantic relationships.
"Well... But why are you saying these things to me?"
Roy's gaze made me want to avoid it. I knew that gaze held something, and I could guess what it was.
"Flora... you..."
Before Roy could finish his sentence, I interrupted loudly.
"Oh! The meat is burning, quickly take it out!"
Roy quickly took the piece of meat out of the pan, and he almost seemed to forget what he wanted to say, and I didn't ask again. Because I was afraid, very afraid of what Roy might say next.
Too much heartbreak had made me cautious and closed off. I didn't have the capacity to bring happiness to anyone. Roy deserved to have a good person by his side.
That dinner ended joyfully, and after Roy left, I lay on the bed exhausted. My stomach cramped and the pain persisted, preventing me from sleeping. I could only sleep a little towards morning, and my body felt extremely tired.
I gently rubbed my stomach, feeling the wondrous sensation growing inside. Sometimes, I would smile foolishly when touching my belly, and this went on for about two to three hours.
I went to the hospital alone; I didn't tell Roy about these things because I wanted to keep them to myself. I didn't want to share this happiness with anyone.
After some tests, the doctor smiled and said:
"The fetus is developing very well, there's nothing unusual. Just remember not to exert yourself too much and ensure you have a balanced diet."
I was overjoyed to hear that. My hands unconsciously rubbed my belly. A new life was growing inside me.
I was immersed in happiness when the doctor asked further:
"Is your husband not accompanying you? He should be here with you. Pregnant women shouldn't come alone."
Hearing this, I felt a bit sad, but quickly replied:
"He's busy with work, and I can come on my own, so it's fine."
I put the test results into my bag, feeling content that I would soon welcome a new life.
This child was Enzo's and mine. I didn't know I was pregnant until one day I felt nauseous smelling food.
The fetus was still small and didn't hinder my work. However, my belly grew larger over time, and some women in the neighborhood noticed even though I was wearing many layers of clothing.
They asked about my health and also inquired about the father of the child and whether it was Roy's and what our relationship was.
I said:
"Roy and I are just normal friends, not in a romantic relationship. I didn't know I was pregnant before divorcing my ex-husband."
They asked many questions, but I could only provide brief answers because I didn't want to talk too much about my ex-husband. I just wanted them to know I didn't love Roy and didn't deceive him, despite their assumptions.
Women often enjoy exaggerating stories, making them complex and captivating. Getting pregnant before divorce wasn't unheard of; in fact, it happened quite frequently.
It's not that I didn't want to discuss being pregnant with Roy, but I felt like I had bothered him too much already. His company had recently started functioning and was progressing well, and he was exhausted from that.
I had savings and income from when I moved here, so taking a break from work to give birth wouldn't affect me too much. But I felt sad because this time, the child wouldn't have their father by their side.
Being pregnant wasn't surprising for me. Whenever I had intimacy with Enzo, he never used protection, even though I reminded him numerous times and refused if there was no protection. But he never listened, not even a bit.
Although I could have used birth control pills, at that time, all my activities were under Enzo's control, and I couldn't buy the pills. And he didn't allow me to use them.
Enzo didn't want me to get pregnant; he just wanted to satisfy his own twisted desires every time we were intimate. That's why I didn't want to be intimate with Enzo, despite loving him deeply.