Chapter 15: Chapter 15

Chapter 14: Merrigold.

If I had any self respect for myself, I'd have said no. I would not be standing outside his door not sure where to put my arms or how to stand to look appealing. If I had any respect for Thomas as a lover I would not be here, even early... he said 8:15pm but here I was five minutes past six. I felt anxious, I was sweating bullets even after having taken a bath. For some stupid reason, I wore the dress his sister had passed on to me. It was a nice ballroom gown... not that it mattered it would soon come off. My logic in this sense was if I was already pregnant then I wouldn't get pregnant again. My logic remained this was to get some benefits for my loved one's. If my body was what he wanted in exchange then so be it. It was not exactly a lie that many slave women who lived better than others did certain deeds for their masters. I had never once in my life thought it would be me. The underlying reason that I'd never mention out loud is how curious I was. Petrified with him finding out. I hoped he wouldn't, I prayed. I told myself I'd tightened around him as hard as I could to my breaking point. To a certain extent I was jealous of Lady Harriet, she had been with him... she had been a virgin. She had given him what I could not at this point. The fear of being pregnant for Thomas crawled up my spine. Reminding me that these little shenanigans would soon blow up in my face. Even though I prayed not.

With a small knock, I stood nervously waiting for his response. "Enter.." he yelled. I did, my hand shivered as I twisted the knob. Closing it behind me, I saw him shirtless watching me.

"You did not have to dress up... you look ridiculous knowing it will be harder to get that off." He bellowed nonchalantly. "I prefer you in your rags because that's you Merrigold. This this just looks like a Harriet counterfeit."

"I will leave, I change my mind. I should not have came. What was I thinking..." I said a tad bit panicked my voice broke.

"Do not be mediocre Merrigold, I'd like to see you undress now." He said with a chuckle. It lightened the mood. "Entertain me and this will be a good night for us both. I will reward you immensely."

Like you did Lady Harriet?

"Why do you refuse to speak to Lady Harriet? What has she done wrong?" I questioned out of the blue. After being with me would he push me aside and look for a better next? Would he avoid me like a horrible plague?

Chuckling, he shrugged. "Sometimes we take our share of apples from a tree but after a single bite, if you realize it's not something you fancy... you're allowed to dispose of it."

"But you can not put it back on its brunch, that way someone else who likes it can have it. Disposing of it will mean it will rot and be of no use." I explained. "You would have ruined any other chance of it being taken by another."

"Look at you being philosophical.." he teased.

"I'm not, it's simply the truth."

"Come here..."

"No.." I said softly. "I reckon you want me to undress off my Lady Harriet counterfeiting dress."

"You're as stubborn as a mule. I fail to understand why I even bother entertaining you."

I simply ignored him, nervously fiddling with the ties of my corset that would not let my breasts breath. I loosen the corset. Removing all the tension from the laces, then untying the bow at the back of my corset. It was was tense... I had never seen him bare of a dress shirt. He seemed relaxed sitting on the edge of his huge bed. I had always found myself wondering how it must have felt to sleep high up, I found myself jumping on it and enjoying the comfort it brought whenever I was alone cleaning. It reminded me that my bed was simply wood and a debilitated mattress, I was still grateful knowing it was not a luxury that people at the common often received. See what I'm doing right now? Distracting my thoughts by thinking about mattresses. Distracting myself from his wondering eyes, it was in this moment I realized he had never seen me fully bare. My throat was dry, I did not dare say a word. I let it slip down my waist to my thighs until the carpeted floor.

As he gulped down his words, his Adam's Apple went up and down.

Standing fully naked in front of him, I fiddled with my fingers. My eyes finding the carpeted floor much more interesting. The buds of my breasts hardened from the cold whiff coming from the doors of his balcony on the right side of his abode. I shivered a bit.

"...I will close those.." He said, his voice seeming constricted. I simply nodded, I was more worried about him being disappointed that this wasn't my first time. Noting that Thomas suddenly seemed like an addict. Every single time we were together or got together, he wanted to have sex. I understood his reasons. He kept on saying... he had been waiting for so long and now that I could be pregnant it was the only time we would get to enjoy sex. I did, I enjoyed it every second with him. The more we did the deed the more I found myself enticed by him. I did not want to think of Thomas in this moment. I felt like a deceiver, deceiving the man who was now standing in front of me, deceiving Thomas... the person I had thought to be my soulmate.

"I had always imagined how... you would look bare but this is just—" he paused. "Beyond anything I had imagined." Taking slow steps towards me... when there was no space left in between, I could feel his breath of my skin. His greys eyes seemed to have brightened within the pupil. Strands of his jet black hair fell on his face... his hair was getting longer.

"Y-you need to get a haircut.." I said almost immediately. I felt as if I could slap myself for ruining the moment. My nerves were getting the best of me, my heart was unsteady. I did not know what to say, my arms felt heavy I did not know where to put them... I felt cold and uncomfortable. Afraid of what was about to happen, I could see it. I could feel it when he pressed against me.

Austin only chuckled.

"Relax, I know this is your first time being with a man. I will be gentle, I'm not a monster. Forget about everything, just pretend this is us having sex. Forget about it being a sin, forget about Thomas. Think about me Merrigold, I'm here and I want you. All of you." He said softly caressing my cheek. It calmed me and scared me. 'Your first time' I had been with Thomas at least four times in counting with every time I visited him. I never suggested it neither could I deny him of it.

I did not get time to process my thoughts as he leaned in to kiss me. I panicked, he was close. "The door?! Is it close—"

"No one is allowed in today..." he told me, I nodded remembering Mrs Brown had told me so. When his lips met mine, I relaxed and melted into his embrace. I enjoyed each and every caress. He tasted so sweet and savory it must have been the grapes he had been munching on before I came in. I let myself get lost in his arms, his tongue rolled on mine. I let out a shaky breath when he touched me. Grabbing a handful of my behind. It felt as if he was milking me for all that I had between. It soft and nothing rushed. I allowed him to carry me to his bed. I allowed him to kiss me with every need and desire that he had for me. His hair tickled me with it's length. I smiled in between our kiss, I felt his lips curve upward too. We did not want to speak, I did not want to say a word. His kisses made me forget the adultery and betrayal I was committing. His hands roamed around my body. When he tried to insert his finger, I flinched stopping him almost immediately. I was terrified stiff... what if he found out. I felt it was better to let his manhood in that way he would not be able to tell.

He was alright with me denying him the allowance to insert his fingers within me. When I got tense, he whispered for me to relax. Suddenly... I knew why Harriet was such a fool in love. I understood why she was desperate and needy for him. This man was cunning and knew exactly what a woman wanted he led the way, played the game well and made sure she was satisfied. Kissing me from my lips down to the valley of my breasts, pushing for me to open my thighs for him. Yet again I panicked, why did he want to poke his head between my thighs... did he want to see my nonexistent virginity for himself. Never the less he convinced me to open up. When his tongue connected with my vulva, my eyes rolled back. I liked this, I loved it. It was hard trying to make sure I don't strangle him with my thighs. His aristocratic nose poked my clit as he did whatever it was. I could honestly think, the people who would be watching us now would say we were immoral. I had never seen such but I loved it. It made my thighs shake with anticipation. I found myself shamelessly bucking my hips to his face. I found myself pushing for him to give me more. The whimpers from my lips were a sign I was now comfortable with him. Comfortable with my body in front of him. As if there was an end goal. The notion become faster, I pulled on his hair without any consideration that I may be hurting him. He would look up and smirk showing that he didn't mind. A feeling of drowsiness succumbed me as my thighs weakened and my lady parts became sensitive. After a few seconds of bliss, the feeling drowned out. I felt as if I had let out some sort of frustration. With Thomas it was nice having him in me but I never seemed to reach that point of ecstasy. It was always ended with him reaching his high and leaving me. After that we could not do much as he would be tired and his penis would have shrunk into its normal size. I never seemed to mind, I simply enjoyed simply having him inside me and the friction between us. Satisfying him made me happy but now Austin had satisfied me and got nothing in return. I felt oddly shameful, why would he do such? Was he not supposed to be disgusted of me? What had he done... it was weird but I liked it. Did he expect something in return? I had assumed this night was for his pleasure...

With that, Austin smirked as I remained lying back. He removed his drawers, my throat tightened as I saw it. Noting I had once touched it on a certain day but it was in the dark. The veins looked as if they would combust any moment. I felt afraid... Thomas was also big in length but Austin seemed big in both length and girth. I found myself bracing for what was to come. He laid a soft kiss on my lips he hovered over me. He tasted weird but sweet. Noting that he had been at my lower area. Rubbing his manhood in between my most delicate place. I was scared, scared that he would come to know the truth. I did not know if I should stop him and simply confess... or just let him have it.

He whispered once more that he would try to be gentle. When he entered me, I flinched as he stretched me out of my fullest capacity. My throat dried up as I closed my eyes. He whispered for me to relax. I opened my for a brief moment, he looked down straight into mine. In that moment I knew. I saw the disappointed look in his eyes before they changed, darkened into an 'I do not care' nonetheless laissez faire stance. He shook his head lightly and let out a chuckle, I was shivering with fear. My vagina became dry with anticipation. Pinning my arms back against the bed, he took me hard and merciless. I was dry from guilt but he did not care. He did not dare touch me anywhere except where our intimacy met. He took me with anger, he did not say a word only grunts. My tears streamed down as he mercilessly ravaged me. I told myself to be quiet and that it would soon be over. Everything hurt, everytime he forcefully plunged in my dry opening it hurt. For a moment all I wanted was to be with Thomas, I imagined him being soft and gentle with me. To think this is what I had fantasied about, shook me. Austin in that moment treated me less than human and more of a mannequin. He looked at me with so much hate and anger visible but he still took me. As he was about to reach his climax he pulled out letting it all string on my belly. My inner thighs hurt, my vagina throbbed. Without another word, he got off me. Frustratedly running his fingers through his hair. He calmly said "Merrigold get out!"