Chapter 18: Chapter 18

LUNAR'S P.O.V

"So you started this when we entered this university?" I ask as I stare, amazed at Nathan's pictures of the franchise, well technically a business.

His business.

His restaurant that he had started and had developed to franchises in 10 states now.

"Niel's Grills." I say the name for the for the 5th time that evening, wondering how I missed it.

His expert recipes, the restaurants popularity in our second year, his name.

"Niel is from Nathaniel right?" I ask and he chuckles, holding me closer.

"Of course." He says, playing with my hair while we're both still seated on the floor.

"My brother is the C.O.O and but also in charge of some of my duties as CEO and so he handles the management of all the franchises till I get my degree. All the business money goes to a separate account and he tells me of any issue or update and we try and work it out together. Honestly, it hasn't been easy." He says and I'm still amazed.

"Wait...so the restaurant you work in..?"

"That's just to keep me...normal I guess? Blending in and all." He says and I lock his phone as I turn to him.

"Why didn't you tell me at first?" I ask softly and he smiles.

"I don't know. You already knew me as Nathan from highschool and well, I guess at first I didn't want to blow my cover. But later I just didn't want you to bother about it, I wanted to spare you from that extra stress. I just wanted us. Nathan and Lunar in my typically average apartment." He says, chuckling and I smile as well.

"Yeah, I love being typically average with you, but I also want to know you. And your tiny little secrets. Amazing or terrible. Like if you were a woman, you can tell me now." I say giggling and he laughs.

"What?" He asks as he turns me towards him and I sit on his thighs. At that moment, both our laughter dies down and in this position, I witness his eyes go dark and he pulls me close.

"Don't I fuck you like a man?" He groans in that deep, husky voice and I try to take deep breaths to stop my pounding heart.

"Refresh my memory." I say and Nathan hovers his lips above mine, teasing me.

I feel his hand at my waist and the other one pulling down my zipper until the top part of my gown drops, exposing my breasts.

"You naughty girl. You didn't wear a bra." He mutters and my breath thickens at the way he calls me naughty. I unbutton his shirt as I press against him and he groans...that deep, sexy groan.

"No more talking." I say and meet his lips with mine. Nathan kisses me like he can't get enough. Deeply and passionately with his tongue doing wonders.

I moan, returning his kisses and he picks me up, still pressed up against him with my legs around his waist.

I wait to feel the bed behind me but instead I hear a door slam and the coolness of the tile on my back.

I pull away now and look around.

The bathroom.

Nathan is looking at me, waiting for my reaction and I take off his shirt completely.

"Are you going to make me take a shower in this dress?" I tease and he laughs before kissing me again.

One by one, we shred every bit of clothing and I'm pressed up against his naked body in the heated shower.

In that enclosed space, enveloped in wetness and heat, Nathan draws out my loudest moans and longest climax.

****

"Do you have to go?" I whine as Nathan gets dressed after hours of cuddling with me.

"I'm sorry baby, but I can't stand them up again. It's just guys meeting for a couple of drinks, and we do that every week." He says as he slips on a shirt and sits on the bed to put on his shoes.

"I'll be back before you know it." He says and leans in to kiss me but I move away.

"What if Lucas is there?" I ask Nathan as I get up from the bed, his big t-shirt covering me up to my thighs.

I turn to him.

"What if he comes here?" I ask and my voice quivers unwillingly at the last minute.

Nathan gets up and walks over to me now, his concerned look back on his face.

"Baby." He whispers, his eyes on mine as he pulls me close.

I hate the fact that I'm still a bit scared of Lucas, of how he can just barge in at any moment and ruin everything.

"You don't have to be scared of Lucas anymore. Not while you have me."

My lip quivers at his show of emotions.

"I know...I...I just don't like it when you leave." I say, trying hard not to cry.

"Come here." He says and pulls me into a tight hug. I try to prevent the tears from flowing but I can't and I surrender to them.

Why the fuck am I crying so much?

"I'll be back in exactly two hours and if I'm not, I want you to march over to Rex's apartment and pull me out by the ear." He jokes and I let a smile play across my lips.

"That's my girl." Nathan says and plants a kiss on my cheek.

And then he is gone.

******

NATHAN'S P.O.V

"No leaving until it's dark, remember?" Stephen asks as he shuts the door just after I pulled it open.

"Guys, come on. I have to go." I tell them for the millionth time that evening. It was well past 2 hours and I was beginning to worry about Lunar.

About her being alone.

Mostly about Lucas making an appearance while I'm not there.

"You made that rule." Stephen reminds me.

"Yes, and I'm breaking it now. I have to leave. I need to get back to my place." I say and Rex laughs from where he is sitting down.

"You mean you need to get back to Lunar." He says and the other guys chorus their realisation.

Great.

Here we go.

"The girl's got quite a hold on you, Nate."

"Tell me about it. She never had such a hold on Lucas."

"More like Lucas had a hold on her."

Laughter.

I clench my teeth as I try to let it slide.

Nothing worse than listening to a bunch of guys making jokes while doused with alcohol.

"You can't blame him though. I wouldn't mind having such a hold on me from Lunar."

"You can say that again. God, the tits on that girl are unbelievable."

"She's got the body of a stripper."

"Waist like a violin."

"That perfect butt."

"Legs that go on and on."

Okay, that's it.

"Alright, that's enough. You guys had your fun, let it go." I say and Stephen nudges me.

"Relax, Nate. These are compliments."

"Yeah, except they didn't work for Lucas."

More laughter.

"Lucas. Fucking legend. Shoved his dick into anything with a skirt."

"And still had Lunar at bay."

"Imagine having a hottie like Lunar at your beck and call."

"And the freedom to explore."

"Yet she'd still give him an easy access."

More laughter.

"Guys...." I say now, almost seeing rage.

I want to say it's not their fault.

They're drunk.

But I can't.

Not while they're talking about Lunar.

My Lunar.

My girlfriend.

"When you look at it that way, you can't blame Nathan for being with her."

"Of course not. He's taking his turn."

Laughter.

"Now I wish I had dibs on her."

"Hey, Nathan. I'm up next! I'd like to get a piece of that---"

I move quickly across the room and grab Tyler by the neck, jamming him against the wall.

"Go ahead. Finish your sentence. I dare you." I tell him, one second away from throwing him on the glass table.

The place is suddenly quiet as the laughter instantly dies down.

"Nate, I'm sorry--"

"Finish it Tyler! Give me a good reason to bash your head open like a watermelon! Set another joke so I can make you the fucking punchline! So I have an excuse to beat up the rest of you!" I yell.

Tyler's face is stricken with fear and he turns to the door.

And his look dissolves to shame.

"Fuck." He says.

I turn too.

Everyone does.

And right there, at the open door is Lunar.

Her eyes are flooded with tears.

Her breathing fast.

Her gaze on me.

I don't need a therapist to know she heard everything.

Every single word.

Suddenly my anger vanishes to guilt and I let Tyler go.

"Lu." I say and she takes a step back, her gaze wandering around to every face in the room.

And her face clouding with more hurt.

"Lunar." I say softly and she looks back at me, a tear escaping.

I watch as she opens her mouth to say something but her jaw just quivers instead.

And then she runs off without a word.

****

LUNAR'S P.O.V

I shouldn't have gone to Rex's apartment. I should have stayed put.

I just wanted to let Nathan know I was going to grab a bite.

I just wanted him to know in case he came back to the apartment and didn't see me.

I should have texted him.

But for some reason I let my two feet carry me to Rex's apartment.

And then..

'The girl's got quite a hold on you, Nate.'

The conversation that carried on after that tore me.

Bit by bit.

Every mocking sentence....

Every smart response....

All said my greatest insecurity....being used by Lucas.

And they spelt it out so heartlessly.

In their eyes...to them...I'll always be Lucas's cheap ex.

The easy game.

The one to be passed around.

And I'm worth nothing more. I have no dignity left.

Just Lunar, the worthless, cheap ex.

More tears escape in my heart-wrenching sobs, my chest aching so much that it's almost too hard to breathe as realization dawns on me.

It doesn't matter that I'm happy with myself.

That I'm trying to move on.

To everyone else,....I'm cheap.

And I should have run away but I stood there, giving Nathan the opportunity to defend me.

To say something.

Why had he stayed quiet for so long?

Why did he let them keep going?

'When you look at it that way, you can't blame Nathan for being with her.'

'Of course not. He's taking his turn.'

And then I had opened the door, but they were too caught up laughing at me, that they didn't notice.

I hold my hand in place over my mouth to stop the sobbing sounds from escaping.

The memory of the incident keeps repeating in my head, summoning more tears.

My phone rings out again and Nathan's name displays on the screen, along with our silly selfie.

I grab the phone now and turn it off.

I wish he would just let me cry. Out here, hours away from school in the little hotel near a Chinese restaurant.

I just want to cry. Cry away my shame. My embarrassment. My worthlessness.

I can't even go back to the dorm, he would find me there instantly. Plus I didn't want to see Tess.

I didn't want to narrate my pity story of what happened this time. Something always seems to happen between Nathan and I just when things start to get better.

And it always starts with me. My insecurity or trust issues or fear of violence or my past.

Always me.

It almost seemed like whenever I tried to move on, something found a way to haunt me and hurt me.

I could have moved on from my life with Lucas....but my life with Lucas will always be my definition.

And with that thought in mind, I curl up under the duvet and cry.

Cry for the fact that I'll always be judged and mocked.

And Lucas will be a legend for doing that to me.

Cry for what can never be fixed.

*****

NATHAN'S P.O.V

Why did I wait so long before running after her?

I stood there, prisoned by the hurt in her eyes and I let her run away.

Unable to decide whether to beat the shit out of them or deal with my guilt alone or run after her.

And by the time I had run outside the apartment building, she was gone.

Now I can't find her. She wasn't in my apartment or anywhere in the entire building.

I curse as I leave the building and head for my car, panting.

I had searched all fifteen floors and not even a clue.

The only chance of finding her now would be at her dorm.

"Please, Lunar. Please be there." I mutter as I start the car and head for the dorm.

Yet, somehow I knew that's the last place she would be.