Chapter 29: Chapter 29

I walked into the sitting room and as usual I saw him seated in front of the tv watching football.

Before he could see me I rushed into Amy's room. It's almost been more than a week talking to him. Every time I see him I would rather move away from there or lock myself into my room. I know that he is being hurt but I have no choice. I heard him every time calling me back when I walked away but I pretended like I didn't hear.

Especially in the dining room. Me sitting opposite him is a great task for me ,to not to look at him as I know that his eyes are always settled on me. I get some kind of feeling inside telling me not to avoid him because I'm his. But I don't get that statement 'In his'.

He told me once when I walked out of my room as he was exiting his room at the same time. I looked at him and stepped back because the gaze he had on me was different. Something different. It shows anger. I am pretty sure that I've gotten onto his nerves. He stepped forward and I kept another step back inside my room with horror. These eyes weren't his. His look was totally different from the way he used to look at me.

No I should not be hurt because if he is angry he won't bother me ignoring him.He won't feel hurt. But why is this worrying me? Why am I feeling devastated that he is having some sought of anger towards me

"You are mine Anna,"he stated coldly and walked down the stairs without giving another glance at me.

I furrowed my eyebrows in response , whereas he had already left. His words took some time to go through my ears and settle in my mind. What does he mean?

I'm not his. I'm his, it cannot be. Ufff I wont get kicked by his words. But my consciousness told something else in reply "I'm yours,"

I stood in front of the door and cleared all the thoughts in my mind. Letting out a deep sigh I knocked at the door.

"Yeah Anna,"Amy asked by opening the door wide.

"Hmmm I just...umm...erm.. you busy,"

"Nah ....why Anna....whats wrong,"she asked with concern.

"I just wanna talk,"

"Yeah....come in Anna,"she said with a smile and I walked in with her and looked around to find Jon.

"He is not here, "Amy stated by looking at me.

With a fake smile I sat in front of her on the bed and looked at her face which had a slight smile on her lips.

"I just wanna....ask ....hmmm.I I I,"

"Anaa,"Amy asked by raising her eyebrows.

"I think umm I just wanna ask you that. It's been a long time me being here,"I looked at her and smiled"perhaps maybe it's the time for me to leave,"

"What, "Amy questioned or would I say she asked in astonishment.

"I can make it up by myself. I can be there. You know as Beca will also be there as she is my roommate also like you,"

"But Anna,why suddenly "

"I just thought of it."

"But it's not too long you've been here"

"Not too long. I have been here for a long time. I'm living here since your wedding "

"Yeah Anna but"

"No buts" I said with a wide smile on my face to show her that I am ok.

"Give me permission. Please. And please convince mom for me. I asked her yesterday about it and she refused. She told me not to go anywhere but I think that I should, "

"You are not going anywhere, "I heard someone saying in the doorway. Amy and I turned towards the door and saw Jon walking into the room.

"I know that I shouldn't have been over hearing the sister's conversation but I'm sorry I did. "He patted my head and looked at me with concern."Have we not made you feel at home,"he asked softly.

"You are not going anywhere as well as I will not allow you to go anywhere,"he stated softly which made me let out a sigh in agreement . I don't know from where that came from but yes they gave the feeling of home. I hugged him immediately while he was patting me and I saw Amy who was smiling at us.

I rested my head on the pillow and the only thought which raised up in my head was Jackie. Why him.

I usually think about my past but now I only think of him. It was quarter to one and the atmosphere was in silence.

My thoughts vanished when I heard the sudden knock at the door.

I walked towards the door taking slow steps. But before I could open the door I heard him on the other side.

"I know that you are awake there,"he knocked again,"come on open up."

I paused and stood there to listen further.

"Don't do this to me Anna. You are making me difficult. What on earth did I do to you. Why me. Why are you avoiding me since the day we kissed. I am sorry if I've done it without your will,"he paused taking some breaths. I could hear his every single move because of the silence which is surrounded.

"It was my will Jackie. I wanted to kiss you and more. I just always wanted to be in your arms and I love when you are around me," I wanna scream this out but I didn't as I repeated this in my mind till I was interrupted by his voice again.

"It hurts Anna, it hurts when you ignore me.I just want to look at you and I want to hear you tell me not to look at you because you don't know how to react. "He rested his head on the door.''I didn't believe in love at first sight but I fell for you Anna. When I first met you in the book store I drowned into you but after being with you I realised that I love you Anna,I don't know why but you give me some kinds of chills you have no idea how fast you make my heartbeat increase"

I walked towards the door to open it. Because I thought it's enough,it's enough .I don't want to do this to him anymore. I just wanted to open the door and hug him saying him that "I'm yours"

Standing in front of the door with a little sense of hesitation I moved my arms forward to unlock the door but his words made me pause.

"I wanna have a family with you. I want you to be mine. ,"his words ran into my mind. I took my hands back and placed my right palm on my mouth to stop my hiccups.

Hiccups,yeah I was crying. Neither of his words ran into my mind except the word family. How can I give him a family when I just can't have s** with him to give birth.

The surrounding captured silence again and I could hear his footsteps clearly and it was fading away,and finally I heard his room door shut.