Chapter 35: Chapter 35

"What are you thinking?" once I didn't respond to him, he murmured in whispers. I stole my eyes from him and kept thinking about this situation. I have waited my whole life for this day and now that it is finally happening, I am stuck. And, luckily, Mr. Ben hadn't walked in on us, if he saw us like that, we are both dead.

"Actually," I uttered, clearing my throat. "I already asked someo---," he didn't let me finish, pulling his body away from me, he shook his head,

"Of course, I didn't mean that you have to come with me. It was just what I wanted." He lowered his head and sat there for a few seconds. He awkwardly forced a smile onto his lips while kept looking at the TV. He wasn't going to fool me with his *Oh I am fine* gestures. But I had no courage to say anything else, he lifted his head to the TV and then got up. Standing on his spot for a few seconds, not exactly moving.

"You know," He uttered, barely audible, "I am late." He finished, turning on his feet to his room. My heart sank in my chest, all my life, yes you are late, but not canceled. I felt my heart crushing in my chest, this was the moment of my life and I missed it.

I shut down the TV and rushed to my room because I wanted to cry out loudly. This stupid boy has no idea how long I have desired for him, and I still do. He made me think about what Lauren used to say about him, he had always liked me or at least felt something for me, but he was blinded by the shimmers of girls like Monica. What if this small incident makes him stop feeling for me, what if he becomes a cold heart to me again, just like before?

I Instantly dialed Dina's number, thinking I must share things with her since we are friends. We had messed up our relationship once, I won't let it happen again by hiding things from her.

"Hello!" my voice was heavy and it wasn't hard for her to acknowledge it.

"Hey, what happened?" there was a sudden panic in her voice.

"He asked me to go out with him at this party," I whispered in my mouth to Dina, she gasped and giggled a little. What was she so happy about?

"Steven?" there was happiness in her tone, my tears stopped suddenly. I gripped my phone tightly and ran my other hand through my hair.

"Tucker!" I corrected her and the enthusiasm escaped her tone. One-minute silence took over her, she had no idea that Steven and I were going together for this party, she did know that I have asked him, but she didn't know that he said yes so in her head, I was talking about Steven.

"He is a ba****," She commented, "What about Steven?" She questioned, asking me if we were going. She thought I called her to give her a heads up, she failed to understand that I was considering Tucker over Steven. And how dare she called him a bas****?

"I don't feel that kind of chemistry with him, I don't feel goosebumps when I am around him," I mumbled, trying to convince her that Steven was never in my mind, he will never be. Maybe what I said when I was drunk was true, I have unintentionally used Steven just to escape from Tucker's thoughts. I wanted to get close to someone else, who will help me forget about Tucker, but Steven couldn't do that, nobody else could. I don't remember what made me be in such a hurry, but I wanted to resolve things like Tucker was leaving for another dimension in a few seconds.

"Steven is your friend right? You don't need to think about flirt and all those romantic things for him, give it some time." In the beginning, everyone thought Steven and I had something going on, so the Orphans and Dina kinda hoped that we will make a couple sooner or later, but they were missing the part where Tucker is above all for me.

"Time? I know for sure." I mumbled, "Besides, I don't know what Steven did with Monica that day so," I felt so dirty once that left my lips. Bringing it up just to convince me that going to this party with Tucker will be a perfect decision, was even too low for my standards. What about my heart, the heart wants what it wants and it wants Tucker, Steven lacked the spark Tucker has, my mind snapped!

"What are you talking about? Are you doubting his character, Elle?" I can hear the annoyance in her voice, "is it because Tucker asked you out? All of a sudden that idiot thinks you are the one?" she sounded irritated, but it's my life. I mean Steven was just a friend, right? Why was he becoming a hurdle between me and my happiness?

"Steven and I are just friends and not even that close friends." I rolled my eyes in irritation, at this point, I was just looking for ways to get rid of him so that I could be happy in a relationship with Tucker. Just think about it, Tucker asked me out for this party, it clearly was a hint that he had feelings for me.

"Be careful where you are heading in your life, Elle." Dina warned, she didn't speak a lot, "see you in school tomorrow." she hung up on me, of course, she did, she was jealous that she has no one and I have two guys who want to go with me. I instantly shut the thoughts in my head, why was I being so mean? Whose influence was that?

.........................

I woke up the next day for school, all confused and lost.

"Come have breakfast!" Lauren smiled at me, she looked fresh. "This one is yours." She quickly handed me the glass of milk, always a special glass for me. I gulped it down before going after Tucker, who was standing by the car. He was on his phone when Ivory and I walked all the way up to him. He didn't raise his head from his phone but slightly opened the door for me with his one hand, not even lifting his face.

Whenever I was in his surroundings, I got chills down my spine that Steven failed to give me. Why was I comparing him with Steven? There was no comparison.

"Tee," Ivory mumbled, getting the attention of her brother. "you should take Monica with you." She stated, making my blood boil in my veins. Why does she always have to act like a matchmaker for her brother?

"Ivory, I told you do not talk to me about a party again." his voice was filled with rage, anger dripping through his voice as he spoke to his sister.

"What is wrong with you?" She commented, frowning and scoffing in annoyance. While she was talking, Tucker quickly glimpsed me through the rear window and stole the eyes from me when I looked at him.

I secretly scratched my palm to avoid the enthusiasm every time he peeked at me through the rearview mirror. What did all those gestures mean?

We have made it to the school before time, parting our ways to the class. I met Dina, who didn't bring up the topic we discussed last night again. The whole day went smoothly, with me trying not to interact with The Orphans again and Dina stayed by my side after spending fifteen minutes with the Orphans, she waited for me to join them, but when I didn't, she came back to accompany me.

I was silent, totally lost the whole day. I just wanted to figure out what I wanted to do, I mean at this point, I was sure that I wanted to go with Tucker but how do I get rid of Steven, did I really use him? But why don't I feel bad for him?

I was slightly hating this side of me, but then I was more satisfied with myself at the same time. With Tucker, probably having a crush on me and trying to go with me, this was the best thing ever happening to me.

"Where are you going?" Dina questioned when after school, I fastened my pace towards the Orphans, who were standing by the fence, talking and laughing.

"I wanna talk to Steven," I announced, running ahead of Dina. "Steven!" I called out for his name, successfully grabbing his attention. I waved a hand at him to have a talk with me and he walked away from his group in my direction. Dina stood slightly afar from us, behind Steven from where I can see her.

"Hey, is everything okay?" He questioned, pushing his brows up, but I ignored paying attention. No, he was not as hot as Tucker was, I refused to see the details of his face or notice his gestures that were too intimidating.

"Yeah!" I nodded my head in awkwardness, "So everyone is going to the party right? Do you need more tickets?" I asked, sounding casual.

"Yeah, I guess so," he looked back at his friends as he mentioned them and then again looked at me. He squeezed his one eye slightly closed into the shining sun.

"Are you going?" I asked and quickly laughed to make it look like it was a joke. He smiled, it was so fake, why? He laughed and looked down, shaking his head slightly.

I looked at Dina, who was shaking her head at me, she kept doing it to make me stop.

"Actually," He scratched his forehead with his index finger, looking down at the grass like he was looking for something, "my mother has some work for me," he mumbled with his mouth.

"Oh, that means you are not going?" It just escaped my lips and the bad part is that the tone was rather happier than sad. "I mean oh no!" I awkwardly looked away when he glimpsed my face blankly.

"Yeah! I can't. I wanted to apologize to you, but didn't know how to," he was playing with his watch in his left hand, his eyes searching for something in the grass.

"Oh no problem, make sure you do her work." there was a relief in my chest, I was so happy that happened. I mean, I didn't break his heart and I got what I wanted, now I can go with Tucker.

"I am sorry!" he repeated, not even wanting to look at my face. It was nice, he was feeling apologetic, which means I didn't do anything wrong because technically he was the one who abandoned me.

"Oh, don't worry. I will be going with Dina." My stupid self mumbled and I laughed, making it appear as a joke.

"Ha-ha!" that fake laugh, made my heart sink in my chest. "Talk to you later." He didn't even raise his eyes or waited for me to say goodbye. He approached his friends and they were watching us this whole time with their arms crossed.