Chapter 36: Chapter 36

"Jake, aren't you going to Strike?" Miana's small voice asked. Jacob only shook his head. Everything was too... groggy. And his head was fucking pounding.

He drank too much last night and he's been staying here in Mia and Jasper's home for the past two weeks. Miana doesn't want him to go home yet. It's fine with her that he drinks, just as long as she knows he's safe and breathing. God, James and the baby inside her womb would have a strict mother when they're grown up.

“I think I'll rest for today. My head fuckin hurts.”

Miana placed her hands on her waist. “What do you expect? You've been like this for quite a while,  Jake. Seriously, you should come into your senses and stop this. You're all over the news again, I hate the tabloids and entertainment news. Who was that woman you were seen with last night?"

"I don't know her name." He smirked. Like he ever gives a shit about who kissed him.

"You're acting like a teenage boy, Jacob. Just because some girl left you, doesn't mean you can just... throw yourself to whomever you want. I've never been in that kind of heartbreak but I know it's not easy. But you don't need to ruin yourself just because you lost her, because you're the only one suffering. You should try your best to move on, Jacob. You can't be like this for the rest of your life."

"She's not some other girl, Mia. She's my wife."

"Exactly! And where she is now? She's with someone else! You deserve someone better than her."

No one compares to Tatiana. If he ever finds someone else, it would always be just the second best.

He hates her so much for leaving him, for throwing away what they used to have even after telling her he didn't leave her before. He hates that he got replaced. That he couldn't be that one person she wants live with for the rest of her life.

Tatiana hurt him too much, from her words, her lies. It was a punch to his gut.

It was a punch to his male pride, to his crown and an insult to himself knowing that he couldn't have the only woman he loved.

He smoked another cigarette. He was left alone in her sister's home. He's gonna pick his nephew later from the daycare.

He admired the flowers in the small garden. Some of them were planted by his mom.  He didn't know she's got a green thumb, well, he didn't know her that much since he came back, since his father's death.

It saddens him when he remembers his mom.

It will always sadden him because his mother never had many reasons to live. She got sick and suddenly she thought it was the end for her.

He still haven't gotten over his mother's death, it followed by the loss of Tatiana.

He thought she'd never leave.

He was about to stand up and get inside the house but then he felt her, before he even saw her.

"Tatiana?"

He needed to blink again and again just to confirm that it was real. That it was really Tatiana.  He may be hallucinating.

"Tatiana..." he repeated. He just saw her walking towards him and giving him a tight embrace.

“I can't leave you, Jake.” Her voice cracked before she clung into him like his second skin. Jacob sucked in a deep breath when he realized this isn't a dream or an illusion. She's real. She's right here!

It almost felt unreal to him but then feeling her warm body, he knew she's right here infront of him. She's holding him.

If this is just a dream...

"Tatiana..."

"I'm sorry, Jake. I'm so sorry."

He released her, it was so obvious that Tatiana didn't want to let go yet. "I thought... you wanted us annulled?"

Tatiana shook her head. “I called my lawyer to withdraw.”

“I want to apologize to you, Jake. I didn't mean to say things like that. It was hard for me to. I know I have hurt you so much and I don't deserve to be here after all the things I've said and after I left you. I'm sorry for the things things I have done, and for keeping things I should have told you from the start." she was ranting, Jacob couldn't understand her clearly now because she was crying and stuttering.

He pulled her to him.

He couldn't say anything. He was just too speechless and disoriented yet. He didn't know how he'd react.

"You won't forgive me for what I did. You won't..."

He noticed the sadness in her eyes, the regret and the guilt. He didn't understand what was that for. Did she do something? "Tatiana, what are you saying? I don't understand." he wiped her tears and tucked the loose strands of her hair in her ear.

"You would surely leave me after this. I'm... I'm so sorry Jake."

She noticed that her hands were shaking. Her lips were trembling. She was so scared.

Scared of what, then?

"Tati what is it?"

"You should... probably wait here." She lowered her head before she left.

He didn't understand what she was sorry for, or if he has a reason to leave her. He couldn't think of any reason. Maybe Tatiana was just over thinking, and if this was about the supposed to be annulment then it id all in the past.  And if she wanted to come back into his life he has to make sure she loves him enough to not leave.

He was too consumed with his thoughts that he didn't notice she was infront of her.

Holy shit.

His knees buckled, and he felt like he was poured with cold water. He almost felt his whole world spin. For a minute, he was lost.

His heart was fucking racing, like any minute it would explode.

The kid is mine.

His mind chanted.

Every step he took towards the young boy that looks so much like him was so slow.

always makes us feel like it's coming into a slow motion. And that's how he's feeling right now.

His pointed shoe and the boy's rubber shoes touched. Jacob had to look down.

From their eyebrows, the color of their eyes and their hair, even the crook of their nose and their lips, he knew that this kid is his.

Oh my god. For the first time in his life he just wanted to break down and cry in happiness, in betrayal.

"Are you my papa?" He heard the little boy asked, causing him to snap out of his daze. He crouched down, their eyes were on the same level, he held the little boy's cheeks.

He nodded again and again, he cleared his throat before he spoke. The last thing he want is to sob like a fucking chic in front of his son.

His son.

"I am your father." He smiled, trying to fight back his tears but he failed. He immediately wiped it away.

His son wrap his arms around his neck.

All he can do was to hug him back. Guess he wasn't the only one ecstatic right now.

"I waited for so long, Papa." He heard him say, the little boy let him go. His son looked at him before he spoke. "My name is Julian, papa. And you are?"

"I'm Jacob." He accepted the hand of his son before they both laughed in between their tears. In the corner of his eye nahagip nito si Tatiana, she was there crying. He clenched his jaw. They will have to talk yet.

The time quickly flew by and the next thing he knew it was late in the afternoon, he was too preoccupied with his son, getting to know him.

He was still reeling with the fact that he was a father.

A father. Wow.

He has a son who looks like him, an incredible and handsome young boy. Tatiana, him, and their son. They're a family. There has been a product of the love Tatiana and him had.

Nine years.  He had been a father for nine years already, and Tatiana chose not to say anything.

"So your name's Julian Joaquin. I'm guessing it was your mama who named you?"  they wete sitting on a couch and eating fried  chicken he ordered out. Tatiana didn't join them. She was at the garden, maybe trying to gather herself. Not that Jacob would appreciate her presence right now.

Julian nodded. "It's from mommy's grand parents, they took care of mommy when she was small.”

Somehow, it made him smile though. Those were the people who took care of Tatiana. He'd always be thankful.

His mind was running already. He had to make a call to his assistant. He wouldn't make it to his office tomorrow, he would call a home organizer and have his condo unit rearranged. It should be a condo suitable for a kid, for his son.

His wife and son will live with him.

He wouldn't have it any other way around now. He wouldn't have it in Tatiana's terms.

And oh, maybe he could take his son into the mall to buy him toys. Anything.

"Momma said you're a great painter, I also paint, papa. Though, not good as you maybe. I mean that's okay yet, right? I'm still young." Jacob had to laugh not because of what he said but because of his accent. He can hear the Italian dripping in it.

He ruffled his son's hair. “Well, you probably got that from me , son. Your mommy sucks at drawing. Perhaps you can show me your artwork? Let's get your stuff out of you house.”

"Why are we gonna get our stuff at home?” Julian asked innocently.

"Because you, silly, is gonna live with me. You and your momma. Do you want that? You and I, and your mom in the same house.”

He saw him nod. God, they look so much alike. He couldn't wait to see Miana's face when she sees them both!

"I though you weren't coming back, papa. Momma told me you'll come home soon but you still haven't return.”

So she hasn't told her son that Jerome was his father...

Tatiana hid the truth from him, he doesn't know yet the reason. If it was about that he left then she should have told him when she found out the truth. Or is she scared? Or she simply didn't want to introduce both of them?

That thought alone hurt him. If Tatiana truly loved him, why would she hide the truth from him? Why would she betray him like this? Don't he deserve to be in their son's life?

MIANA CAME home around eight. The look in her face told him he wasn't the only one shocked. Due to her hormones, she cried while hugging her nephew.

"Jake, wow. I can't belive this." She said in her sobs.  "You're a father now."

Tatiana was just there, witnessing the reunion and she couldn't take away the guilt and regret she was feeling. Jacob deserved the truth from the start, but she robbed him of it.

Dinner was... okay. Julian was the center of attraction. Miana also acknowledged her presence.  She didn't look mad at her, the older Shaw even smiled, Miana even passed her the food.

But Jacob was ignoring her, like she doesn't exist. She was prepared and saw this coming.

But it still hurt.

At the same time she knew she has no one to blame but herself.

She brought this hersef, she have to pay the price.

"Tatiana, can I talk to you?" Jacob said coldly. She followed him to the basement when he asked if they could talk.

"What is it?" She cleared her throat. She could instantly feel the distance between them.

“I want to get aomw of Julian's stuff so he could live with me.  He already agreed, and this is also what he wants."

"But..."

"There is no buts here, Tatiana. From now on, everything that concerns my son would be on my terms since you had yours for the past nine years." He spat before turning his back.

"No. You won't take away my son, Jake. I am the mother.”

"And I am his father but what did you do, you hid the truth from me, Tatiana. Since we met, you had all those times to tell me but you didn't. You even let someone else take care of him when it should have been me!" He looked at her as her tears startes to form. Jacob clenched his jaw, this time he wouldn't be easily carried away by her tears. He wouldn't be deceived.

"Stop the waterworks, Tatiana. I wouldn't buy that. Oh you can come with him and live with us. That's how it should be, husband and wife, right?" He said sarcastically.