Chapter 33: Chapter 33

JACOB's shaky hands lit up the stick of cigarette. He's been chainsmoking for 3 days now. Kept himself locked inside his room with the liquor and cigarettes.

These days, these are the only things that kept him sane.

He received tons of phone calls from his company probably asking his whereabouts. He got fed up with all the calls he was getting he decided to throw his phone across his room. Well, he doesn't care about anything at all.

His eyes met with the large mirror beside him. He chuckled. Funny what a broken heart can do, it can turn a CEO looking like a homeless man.

"Jake!" In his head, he can hear her soft laughter back when they were in the island. They were so young, so careless they only cared about their feelings.

He chased after her. When he finally kept up, he picked her up in his arms and carelessly threw her in the waves. She emerged, chuckling so hard.

Jacob would forever recall in his mind the happy moments with her, even if it felt like they never happened now. Tatiana was his toxic, his bomb, the triggers in all the reactions. He was hers and she can break his heart.

He was so lost into his thoughts until his cigarette was burning out. He immediately reached for another one.

He wondered if Tatiana's fucked up like he was now. Bet she's not, she let him go, right? Discarded him just like that.

He smiled bitterly. Well, if the really thinks about it, they were young when they got married. Maybe Tatiana was just infatuated with him, that's why. He didn't believe when she said she loved him, nobody leaves the one thry love.

He must have fallen asleep, because when he opened his eyes, he saw sister. He saw trace of tears in her eyes, Jasper was behind her.

"Mia?” He slurred, tried to stand up from the floor where he lay before he felt everything was spinning. Fuck!

“What do you plan on doing, Jake!

What the fuck is wrong with you?! You've been missing for three days! You can't be reached and I was so, so worried! Here you are, getting drunk!. Don't you care about how I feel at all, Jacob? You're really hurting me right now!" Mia sobbed. Jasper was behind her in an instant to comfort her.

"Shhh. That's bad for the baby." Jasper cooed.

Baby? I'm having another nephew or niece?! Jacob wanted to speak about it but his head hurts so much, he couldn't even process why his sister was ranting so much.

He felt her picking up all those empty bottles of whiskey.Like a mad woman she disposed them all in his trashbin. She opened all the windows. He had his eyes shut when the rays of sun hit him.

"Jesus! You even look pale! You even stink!do you still take a bath, huh, Jake? And don't even tell me you didn't eat anything because swear to god, I'm so pissed at you right now, Jacob Luis. "

He saw her tap her foot. He stayed silent. It's been a while since he saw her sister this mad. Years, actually.

He stared at her blankly. Miana crouched down and their eyes met. Her anger slowly disappearing. "What happened, Jake?"

Jacob didn't know what his tears were for. Maybe because he was being comforted or maybe, because he remembered why he was so miserable.

"My wife," he choked. "She want us to divorce ”

"What? What are you talking about, Jake? You're not married, okay? Jasper, I think we should take him to the doctor now..." Miana trailed off when her eyes landed on his ring. "Oh god, don't tell me..."

"Mia, I'll explain it to you okay." Jasper pulled her towards him. Miana stood there damn frozen, not believing what was going on around. And Jasper knows!

His brother in law placed him into the bed. "Get some rest, Jake."

He nodded.

When he woke up again, his sister and Jasper were at the sofa. Miana sensed his presence. She immediately stood up,"I cooked lunch. Come on, since you haven't eaten for a few days. After meal, you should take a bath, I'm not joking when I said you stink."

Jacob nodded and went to the dining room. Miana cooked a lot of him.

He doesn't feel hungry at all but he had to eat. Especially now that Miana is sitting infront of him watching his moves.

"I'm sorry you had to witness everything thats going on with me. I'm sorry, I don't wanna disturb you and Jasper."

"We'll talk about it some other time. For now, I want you to live with us for awhile. I don't want to leave you here alone."

"Mia, I'm fine here---"

"You do not look fine to me, Jacob. If we didn't come here today, maybe we already found you dead or whatever. Pack some clothes, because you're staying with us and this is not negotiable so shut up and eat." She's like a mini version of their mom, she could be intimidatingly persuasive. That's why a lot of people's intimidated with his sister, Miana works in a construction industry where of most of his colleagues are male but they look at Miana with respect and admiration.

She sighed. "You should go to work, Jake..your secretary called me because she couldn't reach you. There's a lot going on in Strike. The company who offers a huge investment wants out because you ditched them twice in a row.

I know you're fucked up right now but you've got responsibilities to do."

Hell, he doesn't even know if he can focus at work at all. He was just too tired for anything but his sister's right, Strike is his responsibility.

"You're pregnant, Mia?"

The corner of her lips tugged. "9 weeks. I'm not showing yet."

How he loved to have his own kids.even before he always dreamt about having one with Tatiana.

He clenched his fist because he knew that dream is impossible now. Tatiana's gonna build a family soon but with Jerome, not with him.

-

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY JULIAN!" His friends and family chorused when he finally blew the candle, followed by his soft laughter. He looked so cute in his white board shorts and blue rash guard that emphasizes his eyes.

Tatiana smiled. If only...

She felt Jerome pressing a kiss on her forehead. She looked up and gave him a small smile.

"Julian looks so happy." He said. Julian's wish was to celebrate his birthday into a pool. His close friends from school and neighbors cane. Tatiana thought she couldn't pull this off since she was busy and distorted. But thankfull, Jerome was there as her wingman.

She looked at the pool, Christian joined their son into thr pool. They hadn't talked much since the confrontation in the library but he's smiling at her. She's just relieved Christian hasn't told their parents yet. She's the one who's gonna tell them. He just needs time. Things have been so complicated she's almost empty.

"Mija, may I have a word with you alone?" it was her mother. Jerome immediately stepped back, "I'll leave you to talk.”

Victoria pulled her into another unuccopied gazebo. "You look stressed, hija. Looks like you lost some weight." Her mom noticed. “Are you okay?"

"I'm okay, ma. Just been thinking a lot of things since Jerome and I have been starting for the wedding preparations." Tatiana sighed.

They hired a weddding planner that could help them. They still need to go for arrangements and food tasting. Everything's a rush. There's no stag or bachelorette party no more. Jerome wanted to rush everything and she knew exactly why. She also knew that once they're married, Jerome is bringing them back to Italy.

About her and Jacob's annulment, it was already posted. Few hearings, some arrangements and everything will be done. She'll bet their lawyers are talking now.

She's really gonna lose him for real this time, huh?

"Then why don't you look happy?" Her mother asked, "This is what you want, right? You don't look so happy to me. Is there a problem?“

She looked into the side, she saw Jerome taking off his shirt and walking towards Julian. He's got a nice body, all those broad shoulders, his muscular chest and abs. Jerome's a good looking guy, even Italian women go after him.

Still, Tatiana wondered why she never had a wildfire desire for Jerome. It was never close to what she felt for Jacob.

Maybe because all this time, she's got her whole heart set for Jacob still. Don't get her wrong, she loves Jerome, she cares for him. But it will never be the same intensity of what she feels for Jacob. The feelings she had for Jacob was a complete somersault. It was unexplainable.

What if he was never kidnapped? Maybe they're still together. Maybe they finally moved back from Cebu after their study. Maybe he's got an art gallery or tattoo shop now, and she, starting to be a chef somewhere or having her own little restaurant.

And more kids, perhaps. She imagined a little girl who looks like her this time, and another boy, who resembles Jacob like Julian does...

Jacob will always be her what if, and the love of her life.

"Mom, there's something I need to tell you."

Victoria waited, "The months I was here, I was... seeing Julian's father."

Victoria smiled sadly. Tatiana might have never been her child biologically, but she loves her as her own. So she knows Tatiana. She knows her daughter's bothered, she doesn't even look like an excited bride.

"And you're still inlove with him, aren't you?" Victoria asked, "have you told Jerome about this?"

"I had. Jerome was so angry. But he forgave me, mom. And he asked me to marry him this time, well you know I said yes. When I told him to stop seeing me, i know that I hurt him so much. And I knew then I would forever regret that I let the love of my life slip away. Especially after he explained to me everything.”

Tatiana told her why he got separated from her, and that he's really somewhere near and famous. She didn't tell her his name though. There was no need for that. Someday she'll bump into Jacob Shaw and she'd immediately recognize him and his resemblance to her grandchild.

"First love is the most powerful love in this world. And even years later it is still the hardest to fight against. because it's the love where you empty your heart and soul. Your father was my first love." Her mother smiled, looked into the direction where Albert was talking with some other kids. "So I married him."

Tatiana leaned in to her. "Life is a series of choices and I know deep inside you, you know who you want to spend your whole life with.This isn't about your son anymore, this is also about your happiness."