Chapter 27: Chapter 27

Chapter 27 Survive

The gentle moonlight caresses my face as I stare up at the twinkling night sky. The breeze blows little strands of hair in my face, sticking to my lips. I lie in a little make-shift bed made of cardboard and some scrap towels.

I found a little grassy hill that outlooks the city, and decided to sleep there, away from any man that may do me harm.

It's late at night and I can't sleep, and it's not because of my crappy, uncomfortable bed.

The consequences of my betrayal weighs heavily on my mind. It's like it eats away at my soul, threatening to destroy what's little left of my life.

And it feels absolutely depressing. The guilt that pulls me down keeps me lying wide awake.

And I know that I can never see Ace again, because death will follow him.

It's every gang's code.

Betray the gang, and you will pay for it with your life.

And worse of all, I broke Ace's trust.

He doesn't trust people, and, for a good reason, too. But here he comes, and picks me up off my feet.

I learn to trust him and he learns to trust me.

But I took that trust and bashed it.

I bashed it to pieces.

I should of just let them torture me to death...I feel awful and sick that I did that to him. I know how he is---he is probably planning my demise. He is a gang leader, after all.

I remember very well what the punishment was for being double crossed.

In fact, I would often hear the executions going on when I lived with my dad. He used to drag in some of his Gang members, accuse them of double crossing him, and put a bullet right in their heads in the living room.

Of course, I'd lock myself in my room, but I could still here the shouts and gunshots.

Soon after, my dad would angrily kick my door down, and order me to go 'clean up the mess.'

I was always horrified.

Mopping up the blood and brain matter horrified me each time.

You'd think you would get used to it after awhile.

Nope. Not me.

I'd often drown in my own tears as I was cleaning "this mess" up. Not only was the sight graphic, but it caused me to dwell on this one thought:

How could one take someones life so easily?

Sure, gang leaders seem to do so.

But how do they do it? How can they just end someones life without hesitation? I don't think I'll ever find an answer to that question.

A shiver runs down my eyes and sleep begs to take over.

I sigh loudly.

Tomorrow I search for a job.

I need to survive somehow.

And as I slept, the mafia and Ace were planning on hunting me down and unleashing their wrath upon me....

And it's only a matter of time before one of them finds me.

* * *

My feet ache with every step.

Job....job...job!

All day long, I've been hunting for a job.

And so far, I've been unsuccessful.

The shop owners take one look at my dirty clothes and practically shoo me out of their store.

"Gotta love humanity." I grumble to myself under my breath.

I turn the corner of the gray, dark streets and find myself in front of a record store. I wish myself luck, and head in.

And then my hope is lost right when I see Sage, the guy who was a jerk to me last time in a record store. My mind recalls the time when I passed out right in front of him.

How embarrassing.

I should have turned around and walked out immediately, but alas, I just have to open my mouth.

"You again?" Asks Sage in a bored tone. He still wears the same white T-shirt and dark wash jeans like last time.

"Do you own every single record store in this city?" I ask in exasperation.

Sage shrugs. "Eh, my dad has a thing for music."

Awkward silence.

Crickets seem to dance around us as they playfully sing their song.

"Was there something you wanted?" Asks Sage, finally breaking the awkward silence.

"Uh, yeah," I say, shoving my hands in my front pockets of my hideous green baggy pants, "A job."

Sage cocks a dark eyebrow at me, and folds his arms over his chest.

And then he says nothing.

He says nothing!

Instead, he just stares me down silently.

I cough awkwardly, hoping to gain his attention.

Nothing.

"Hello?"

Nothing.

My eye twitches in frustration. I'm tired, hot, hungry, thirsty, guilty, and in desperate need for money.

After all, who else is going to pay for my food and feminine napkins?

"HEY ASSFACE!"

That snaps him out of his immature game of silence.

I hope I broke his ego.

"I don't have all day!" I add.

"Oh, that's right! Let me think about it." Sage says rudely.

His face contorts into that of thought. He deliberately takes his time as he strokes his chin in thought.

"How about....no?" He finally replies.

I grumble, and spit, "Captain skinny dick."

He just laughs in response.

"What are you, five?" He mocks.

That's it! I'm done wasting my time here.

Without another word, I turn on my heel.

But then Sage's voice calls out.

"Hey, you forgot to pass out like you did last time!"

I turn around, glaring at him. "There are several people I find obnoxious in this world, and you are all of them!" And then I slam the door of his shop so I don't have to see his response.

Humanity sucks! I scream in my head.

I walk back up the street in defeat, eyeing the club that remains open with a "now hiring" sign outside of the door.

I really don't want to work at a bar. Too many men and the environment just screams danger for me. A shiver runs down my spine at working at some dingy club.

I have never good at math in school, but I've been around long enough to know that men + alcohol = disaster.

But, I'm afraid the bar is my only option left.

I open the door of a run down looking bar. The inside isn't any better, as it smells like sweat, cigarettes, and alcohol.

The bass of the music is a low thumping in my ears as I eye the bar.

A woman with a dark complexion and wearing a low cut T-shirt serves drinks at the bar. Her black curly hair is tied in a pony tail, her dark curls dance down her back.

I'm hesitant.

Do I really want to do this?

What other options do I have?

"Hey, you gonna buy a drink or somethin'?" The woman questions, quirking a brow.

"Oh, uh...no. I'm just in need of a job so-"

"You're hired!" She exclaims, cutting me off.

"Really? Just like that?"

"Yep. Here's your uniform." She says, pushing some clothing into my hands.

"Uhm...but what about your boss? Won't he care or....?"

"Nah, he won't mind a pretty girl like you working at a place like this. Now get changed, beer's ain't gonna serve themselves." She replies, flicking her ponytail.

Alright then....

The one job I never wanted is the easiest to get. Of course.

I head into the bathroom and change. Once I'm changed, I take a look at myself in the bathroom mirror.

And when I look in the mirror, what do I see?

Boobs.

My boobs, to be exact.

You've got to be kidding me.

The burgundy shirt is much too low. I sigh in exasperation.

Now, my boobs aren't big at all. They're small, to be exact. I make sure to keep my cleavage hidden with the clothes I wear, so this....this different.

And I don't like it.

Money. You need to eat. You need clothes. You can deal with this. I tell myself.

And then I walk out of the bathroom.

"Lookin' good! Now, let's show you the ropes. First, my name is Pebble. Not exactly the greatest name, I know. My mom must've been drunk and higher than the damn Foresthill bridge in Ol' Cali when she named me that one fateful day."

I don't know how to respond, so I say nothing.

My social skills are next to none, I know.

"So, here's what to do when someone asks for a shot...."

And so my training began. It was quite the....interesting experience to say the least.

All night long I met men from all walks of life. From young, to fake ID's young, to middle aged to "I need a walker and prune juice" age.

I met some men that were hot, and some men that were not.

I met broken people who drink to forget about their problems, and I met rich people who seem to have it all.

By the end of the night, I smelled of cigarettes and alcohol. My feet felt like they were dying, and I was exhausted.

But my pockets were heavy with the tips I had gotten from that night.

And when I counted the money, I found that I have enough for food to eat for the night. My stomach rumbles in satisfaction at the thought of food.

I don't care what kind, as long as it tastes good and fills my empty stomach.

And, deciding I want to save as much money as possible, I go to perhaps the cheapest fast food restaurant in the nation.

McDonald's.

So, that night, I curl back up in my makeshift cardboard bed. I gaze up at the stars as I chow down on my egg Mcmuffin without egg. Odd, I know. But the eggs always taste weird to me.

And that night, I fall asleep with a full stomach.

While my stomach was satisfied, my conscience was not.

* * *

A month flies by, and by working at the bar, I've made enough money to rent a room for a dumpy apartment nearby. Pebble and I have become good friends. She doesn't question my past at all, and I like it that way. She doesn't tell me about her past either, and I figured that if she wants to, she will in her own time.

"I don't know, Pebble, I'm just kind of sick of this life." I tell her, "This isn't me, there has to be something more. I just know there is. I just want to live a life I can be proud of, not being stuck here serving alcohol all day."

"Gurl, I agree with you one-hundred percent." She says, taking a puff of her cigarette.

"I just want to spread my wings."

"Then go for it." She says, shrugging.

"But how? I don't exactly have enough money."

She rolls her eyes. "Bull. How much money have you made?"

I've been saving every penny I can. Some nights I even went without food in order to cut down the costs. It wasn't easy, but it was worth it.

I know have quite a bit of money saved.

"Alright, I guess you're right." I admit to her.

"Uh huh, I tend to get that a lot." She replies with a playful smirk.

"Hey, Pebble! A customer needs you!" An employee suddenly calls out.

"Eh, break's over. I'll talk to you soon." Says Pebble before walking away.

The rest of the night seemed to be slow. There weren't very many customers, and the shift wasn't as stressful as the night before. I was exhausted though, as I got little sleep last night. I have these terrible nightmares of both my abuse and my guilt.

My guilty conscience has plagued me with nightmares that haunt me.

It's horrible.

I'm standing behind the counter, yawning. The daylight is quickly fading, and my shift ends within an hour.

A middle age man wearing a white t-shirt suddenly approaches me. His brown hair is in dreadlocks, his skin is pale, and his eyes look hollow. He smirks at me and says, "Hey, I know you're the bartender, but....can I buy you a drink."

I raise my eyebrow in suspicion.

"C'mon, lass. It's just a drink, that's all." He coaxes.

"I...whatever I guess." I reply nonchalantly.

So, he buys me a drink, we talk about books and all kinds of random stuff. It was small talk, so it was uncomfortable. His beer breath grossed me out, so when Pebble called me over for assistance, I was grateful.

"Uh, excuse me, sir, but my coworker is calling me."

I rush over to Pebble, where I help her organize the new shipment of beverages.

But I made a mistake.

I left my drink.

That is something you should NEVER do.

And so when I came back, I took a sip of the drink. Louis was still enjoying his, and I noticed the drink just tasted a little bit off.

I wasn't thinking straight.

I was exhausted, both mentally and physically. Ace was on my mind constantly. My mind wasn't as sharp as usual, and my common sense seemed to have packed its bags and left when it found out I don't get enough sleep.

And so by the time I realized what was up, it was too late.

Everything spun around me, and I fell to my knees.

"W-what?"

I'm confused and disorientated.

"Hush now, let's not pass out in here now." The man says, bending down and throwing me over his shoulder. He takes me out back into a dim alley way.

Nausea strikes my gut, and soon I find myself throwing up the contents of my stomach. My vomit rolls down his back.

"Ugh! Disgusting slut!" He exclaims as he throws me down onto the dirty concrete ground.

You deserved it. I think to myself as my limbs become limp.

I was fading in and out of consciousness when I felt the first rip of my clothing.

My shirt has been torn from top to bottom.

"P-please." I weakly beg.

"Ahaha, no can do, sweetheart." He snickers as he climbs on top of me and gropes me.

He starts groaning his pleasure as he does so, and I feel disgusted.

And it isn't long before I'm stripped down into my under garments.

I feel the man's sweaty warmth on top of my body as he is about to take away my dignity once more.

I know what's about to come, so I let my mind take me to a far away place where the sun always shines and nature lives peacefully. The leopards lie down with the calves, and the wolves make friends with the little lambs.

But then as quickly as the ordeal started, it suddenly ends.

The man is ripped off of me, and through my dazed vision, I see a man with dark skin.

I hear the panicked grunts of the man who was about to rape me before the sound of a gun goes off. I start to panic, believing that I'm next, believing that the man who has shot my rapist has come to do the same to me.

My breathing is labored, and all I can do is lie there helplessly on the ground as I await my fate.

The dark man squats down next to me, and I flinch away from his touch. His face is blurry from the drugs, so I can't make out his features.

"Shhh hey hey, calm down, Dakota. It's just me." The man says gently as he places a warm hand on my shoulder.

Wait...I know that voice....

"J-Jordan?" I question weakly.

"Yes, Dakota." He replies softly as he wraps his black jacket around my half naked body. "I'm getting you out of here."

He tenderly wipes away the blood on my cracked lip, and examines the scars that are on display for all to see. "Oh Dakota, what have they done to you?" He says, his voice full of compassion.

I don't say anything.

I can't.

Everything feels so weak.

He then picks me up in his strong arms as gently as he can and starts walking.

I feel the cool breeze hit my face as I fade in and out of the darkness.

"There's no way you betrayed him by choice. No damn way." He whispers as he quickly walks through the dark alleys and streets of the worst parts of the city. My eyes feel heavy and they threaten to roll to the back of my head.

But before they can do so, his voice cuts through the darkness.

"I'll think of something, Dakota. I won't stop until you're back in the safety of Ace's embrace again. That's a promise."

Don't make promises you can't keep.

And that's my last thought as I let the drug take over my body.