Chapter 32: Chapter 32

I have never known what love was like my whole life. My father and mother definitely wasn't ’t in love with each other neither they had some to give me. I was raised by tutors and nannies. My father never took me to my school plays where I was the main lead. In one play I became a princess and in the next I was an angel. I wished for  my parents every time when I was on the stage but their seats were always vacant so was my feelings towards them . Though Muslims they never practiced anything remotely religious, both were swamped with work or their lovers. I sometimes wonder why they have given birth to me. For me it was the worst decision they made.

I knew I was beautiful. It was a plain fact I randomly got selected every where I went whether it's for drama, interview or pub. I was given entrance everywhere. I never thought about it, not even for a second. Not until I saw her. She wasn't beautiful at all to me. But he looked at her like she was the angel from heaven. Every one could see it except her. Either she was an idiot or crazy for missing it.

But her eyes were not so innocent when she looked at the waiter. He is handsome but he is not Rocky. He didn’t play football like Rocky,  he didn’t smile like him either but she couldn’t take her eyes off him. I knew it pains Rocky to see her salivating after a server. I loved Rocky more than she ever could. I remember seeing him on my first day when we were both freshmen. I was a sucker for tall guys because the majority of guys couldn’t match my height. It gave them ego to last their life.

But Rocky was entirely different. I have never wanted a guy in my life like Rocky. He was perfect for me and I for him. But for some reason he failed to see this. But I will make him understand. I have never done this kind of a thing in my life but I had to or else I will lose him. Money has never been an issue for me neither for Rocky. We both were born into money. My father had taught me one lesson in life to this day I carry it in my mind. Once I wanted to run away from my parents because they were forcing me to live a life I didn't want to. I wanted to become a vet. But they were interfering in my career prospects as well. Me and my then boyfriend decided to go away together. But we were caught red-handed by my parents. I was surprised how they had come to know of it. Turns out it was none other than the said boyfriend who rattled our plans. I was heartbroken and sad to hear this. That was when my father said,  " Dear everyone has a price. You only have to offer ". I have never forgotten his words.

Later I became as jaded as my father. I discovered that boys were indeed toys. Anyone would want a hot girlfriend like me. They don't care about my feelings at all. So I started to use them as they did me in the past. They were disposable towels for me. I wanted to enjoy my life but I learned as a woman I had several limitations. But having a boyfriend changed everything. Having a boyfriend means an ATM, chauffeur and bodyguard all rolled into one. I didn't have to watch out for my drinks or fear getting raped when I had one. So I had one always in tow. In fact , after that knowledge I made sure I had a boyfriend every time.

I broke up with them easily like one time this guy forgot to bring me my favorite flowers so I broke up with him. Being in college also didn't change me. I knew if I had to survive here I had to be in a relationship. That's when I met Rocky. He took my breath away the moment I saw him. I have  never seen this much tall person in my life. We casually talked-about various topics and discovered many common things. He asked for my number and I gave it to him and the rest is history.

In the beginning of our relationship itself he told me he didn't want anything serious neither did I. So we agreed. He never took me to his home either. We were having the best time of our lives. We  hooked up everywhere we could think of. That was until he confessed he didn't want me anymore but then I saw her with him. I easily put two and two together but the funny thing was that it was not a love triangle but a square. Before she realizes that Rocky was far better than the server I should save him  from her clutches. I have tried everything including kissing Rocky in front of her but nothing came out of it. It was just that she was far more sharp than I let myself think. She was always flirting with the server. So I thought of a new plan that had to work.

I put on my best dress yet again there was no shortage for them. My mother and father make sure of that. Earlier Rocky used to pick me up now I drove myself. But I didn't want Rocky to be my bodyguard or chauffeur. I want him to be with me for good. I love him more than that gold digger who had eyes only for the server. Men never said no to me especially when I wore a short dress. I put on my micro mini skirt just to make sure everything goes fine. I was early Raja was cleaning up he had a good body I would give but I never liked it anymore than Rocky's. I know what I'm about to do probably will earn his hatred  but I have to risk it or lose Rocky forever.

When I reached the canteen he was arranging the tables. I went near him and said hi with a smile. "What's it?" He asked his eyebrows raised man he was smart. I pulled down my innocent expression to talk business. "Hey I want you to carry on our bet. Make her fall in love with you", I said.  "But your boyfriend tells me otherwise he had warned me to not even go near her. I don't want to fight with him. I have no time for nonsense " ,

he said.

"Does 200000 mean alot to risk everything. I will pay you only if this girl sleeps with you. I want proof also. So Rocky stays with me, not that whore ." The last part slipped out unconsciously. I didn't mean to say that. "Careful barbie where you are going there is no return afterwards ", he said. "Don't call me Barbi. If you want to have the money you better start respecting me", I said. He nodded his head but doubt was still there. "I need some time for at least two months, he said. He wants to negotiate now I thought. "I will give you 3 weeks or the deal is off", I said. His face was not pleasant but he didn't say anymore. "Don't tell him I was behind this ok", I said. He rolled his eyes in response. I didn't know what that girl saw in him except a hot body. Maybe a hot body was enough for her. I'm never satisfied by it. I wanted Rocky not because of his body but soul. I would never lose him again.I walked towards the campus but not before thinking about the last conversation we had as a couple or atleast I believed we were.

"I want you to come to my home this evening. My parents have gone put and we can chill at our house. I'm sick of cars and cabins. Hey are you even listening to me", I asked the man who was obviously not listening to me but looking somewhere rather someone. It was her. Every time I saw something like this my blood boils. "Ok but just to chill. We are not going to do anything untoward ", he said lightly but his voice was totally wrong. "We will see about that ", I said. When I was in the car I could already feel the vacuum in our relationship.

I wasn't one of those who backs down without a fight. I put a message to my house keeping staff to leave already. They know not to disobey me. When I reached my home Rocky was still in thought. I had to poke his ribs to get his attention. We got out and I dragged him to my room. Usually I changed my dress and had a shower before getting into my bed but today with Rocky with I just wanted to jump into bed with him to make his attention full on me.

I pushed him to my bed and removed my shirt and bend to kiss him. We kissed passionately my tongue darted out to touch his lips. His tongue met mine feverishly. I knew our spark was still there. I put his arms on my breast. He cupped them then bent to kiss them. A moan slipped out of my mouth his mouth reached for my mouth again.  I pulled at his shirt. He peeled it away I caressed his abs. He was perfect. My hands gently went down to unbutton his jeans but his arms stopped me. His eyes now were devoid of passion was looking at me in dilemma.

"I'm sorry for hurting you Leila. I can't do this again not when I know how much you love me", he said. I didn't know why but my eyes were wet. I put my palm over his mouth, " Don't say anything I know you will regret this one day", I said. He removed my palms and said," If I didn't say anything now I will regret this my whole life. I have done enough damage as it is. I'm in love with another girl". If one could hear heartbreak I'm sure you could hear it. "Does she love you back?", I asked. "I don't know I haven't asked but I think she doesn't share my feelings so far ", he said. I didn't even ask her name since I know who was he talking about. Hell I couldn’t say her name.

He got up put on his shirt and bent to kiss me goodbye. "I love you too just incase you wondered. You can be sure with me. I will always love you no matter where you are and  what you do", I said last line was barely audible. "I know that Leila and I love you too. I wish it was enough ", he said. Then he left. "It's enough for me ", I said but he didn't hear it.

The next day I waited for him and she was there I didn't plan it by anyways. I went ahead and kissed him. There were several wolf whistles and awwwing. She left without a second glance at him. He didn't kiss me back but just stood there. He didn't push me away or curse at me but gently peeled me away.  He won't embarrass me like that infront of every one. He was a gentleman always. He pulled me into a nearby empty class and said,"What were you thinking Leila? You know this is not going to change anything between us", he admonished. I didn't look at him if I did I will cry. I don't want to be weak. I stood my ground and said, "I want to make sure you know what you are missing ".  I tried to make our conversation light but it didn't work like normal. "I already know what I'm missing. You are am amazing woman. Please don't pull anything like that ever again. It will only add to our pains", he said. Maybe he was right I should let him go. It was easier said than done.