Chapter 51: Chapter 51

MIA

I have been bedridden for a couple of days. I am either too weak or too sore to get up. I think everything that has happened throughout my stay in this pack has finally taken a toll on me. But I wasn't worried. I knew I was going to be okay. But being in bed for so long...it gets you thinking about certain things. There is nothing else to do anyway. When you are in one place for long, doing nothing, you can't help but turn to your thoughts to entertain yourself.

I thought about a lot of things. I miss being a healer. My hands are itching to mix herbs, create new salves that can help people. Being a healer connects me to my family, to my identity. Being a healer gives me a purpose.

I also miss playing the piano. My mind reverts to the days where Noah was resisting the mate bond. Every night, regardless of whether we fought in the day, we always met in that secret garden upstairs at ten o'clock. I remember the coolness of the keys on the tips of my fingers and as I pressed down...sound would echo throughout the room. Music. Beautiful music. It made me feel free and new again. And in a way, I think it connected me to Noah more so than before.

I remember the hurt that Noah had inflicted upon me. The mixed emotions that would battle inside me. I release a small laugh. Goodness, Noah drove me crazy. He would be so hot and so cold at the same time. Whenever I saw him, I didn't know what I was going to get. But I was patient. I endured the hurt that he had done to me. And then the ball. When we danced to the music together...it was our undoing. Us moving as one together across the floor, it almost was like God hinting to us that we are to move through life together...as one.

I couldn't help, but smile when I found my white cloth in his jacket. He had kept it this entire time. Through the time I thought he totally hated me, he had my scented handkerchief tucked deep in his jacket because it gave him comfort knowing that a piece of me was always with him.

All this trouble...just so then we can be together and then. Was it worth it? Yes. The moments of pain, moments of joy, the times where I wanted to leave and the times where my heart wouldn't let...it was all worth it because at the end...Noah was mine and I was undeniably his.

The door opens and couldn't help but smile when I see my mate, "Hey," I greeted.

"Hey, love." Noah made his way to me and sat on the side of the bed. He cups my cheek softly. I lean into his warm touch, "How're you feeling?"

I shrugged my shoulders, "Okay, still a little bit sore. How was the meeting?"

Noah was silent for a moment. I could see the clogs turning in his mind of what he should say, "It had a promising result."

"Which is?" I asked.

"We can be together...that's all that matters."

I waited for a moment and just stared at him, "What about the alliance?"

Noah sighed and said, "Soul is going to marry Sophie."

I sat up and yelled, "WHAT?"

Noah laid his hands on my shoulders, "Calm down, love! It was his choice, he chose to do it and so he did."

"But he was supposed to go find his mate!" I exclaimed.

Noah sighs and nods his head, "Yeah I know. But listen to me, love, his mate don't want me no more. She has moved on with another. This marriage may help him move on. It may help him heal his wounds."

I laid back down and looked at the roof, "I just want him to be happy."

Noah Lays down beside and says, "He will be happy, love. Him and Sophie can have children, they can build a family."

"But will they love each other?" I asked.

Noah took a hold of my hand and ran his thumb over it, "Yes, they will, love. A love between mates is almost instant. But love between two people...it will grow."

***

I couldn't sleep. Noah was holding me from behind. His front against my back. It felt good. The feel of this great beast holding you, you feel so protected and so little. But my mind is not letting me rest.

I can't stop thinking about Soul. I felt guilty. He deserves his mate. I think that's what cuts me the most. I know the joy of what a mate could bring. I just want him to have the same.

I look over my shoulder at Noah. He is fast asleep. This is the most calm I have seen him. Maybe it's because the war between the rogues is finally over. I smile softy as I stare at him. He can finally be at peace and rest. I lean in and kiss his forehead.

I move away from Noah, attempting to get out of the bed. Key word: attempting. Because as soon as I moved away, Noah was wide awake with his glowing eyes and pulled me back into him.

"And where are you going exactly?" He says in his sleepy ridden voice, which I admit, is intensely sexy.

"I just wanted to go sit on the porch area outside."

Noah sat up to look at the time. The blanket fell and exposed his perfect chest. Just looking at it gave me chills. He is one attractive man.

"It's 1:38 AM Mia, have you not slept, love?"

I shook my head, "I can't, that's why I want to sit on the porch for a bit and think."

Noah sighed, "Do you want me to come?"

I shook my head and laid my hand on his chest, "You've been through enough Noah, You need to rest. You have been fighting so hard. You need to learn when to just stop and be still."

Noah puts his hand over my own on his chest, "I don't deserve you, Mia."

I smile at him and say, "That is your stupid way of thinking Noah. You deserve this and more. Now rest."

I kiss his cheek and I leave him in the room. I am still injured but it is healing better now. I walk down the stairs and out unto the porch. I sit down on one of the outside couches. I bundle myself up in a blanket and I look up at the stars.

I remember doing this at my cottage. On nights I couldn't sleep, I would either go pick more herbs or look at the sky. Looking at the sky always made me feel hopeful about things. It gave me a new perspective when I needed one.

"You mind if I join?"

I look up and see Soul. I smile and nodded my head. He placed himself next to me and released a big sigh.

"You're getting married." I stated.

"Yeah, pretty crazy right?"

I turned to him and ask, "Do you want to?"

Soul was silent for a moment. He was looking up at the sky, contemplating, "Yes. I want this. My mate...she is long gone. We have been separated for almost five years. She hasn't talked to me once. I've tried to chase her. I've tried to find her. But then I realised, the only way I would ever find her is if she wants to be found." Soul turns to me, sadness in his eyes, "She doesn't want to be found Mia. I can't let myself remain in this place of hurt. I need to move on and build a life for myself."

I lean my head on his shoulder and sigh, "You're a good man Soul. I hope you will find what you are looking for in this marriage."

"Me too, Mia...me too."

"Though this moment is very touching, I have let it gone on long enough. I would be very grateful if you stepped away from my mate, Solomon." I heard Noah say behind us.

Soul chuckled. He got up from his chair and faced Noah, he raised his hands in surrender, "You have nothing to worry about Noah, she is yours. I understand that. I only will ever consider her a close friend. She is your mate after all, you will always came first to her."

Noah bowed his head in understanding. Soul looked at me and smiled, "I will be leaving tomorrow. I will come visit, don't worry. But I have admit that I will miss you dearly, Mia Maverick." Soul took my hand in his hold and kissed it tenderly.

I felt the warmth in my heart towards his gesture. Soul is a good friend. I pray that he will have the best life because certainly deserves it.

when Soul leaves I look at Noah. I laugh and shake my head.

"What is amusing you, love?" Noah asks as he comes around and plops himself next to me. He puts his arm around my shoulder and pulls me closer to him.

"You are the one amusing me, my dear. You are so broodish."

Noah chuckles, "I'm sorry. I'm a lycan, I can't control it sometimes."

I shake my head, "On the contrary...I find it rather attractive."

He looks at me while his eyes start to glow bright, "Is it now? I didn't know my being broodish is such a turn on for you?" He leans closer to me and our foreheads touch.

"It is," I whisper closely and breathlessly, "a major...turn on...my dear Noah."

And then our lips touch.