Chapter 44: Chapter 44

What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?

<Azaria>

"Really?! We're going away?" I asked excitedly to Lanvin.

"Yes, wife," he replied seriously, crossing his arms and leaning against the wall.

"When are we leaving?"

"In the later evening. We'll go to Croatia with my cousin. It's our bonding time, and I'll bring you with me."

I couldn't contain my joy and jumped up and down. We're leaving tonight, and it's perfect timing because I'm getting bored at home.

"That's so fast! I'll buy some clothes there! But can I meet Heidi?" I pleaded.

He looked amused and nodded his head.

"Of course. I have a meeting. I'll pick you up, just send me your location," he said, moving closer to me.

He was wearing a long-sleeved shirt and trousers, still partially dressed after his shower. Three buttons of his polo shirt were still undone, revealing a bit of his chest hair.

He wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed me on the forehead.

“Come with me in the company instead,” He said in a deep voice.

He always wants to include me in his company affairs.

I thought about it. I wanted to talk to Heidi and I couldn't stay calm until I see her.

"Hmm, if we finish early with Heidi, I'll come to you," I assured him, pinching his cheeks.

He rolled his eyes.

"Tsk!"

"Is your friend more important than me? I'm your husband, I should be the priority," he said with a frown.

"Give your husband some time," he added.

I smiled widely at his reaction.

"Is my husband being sweet again? We're always together. Aren't you tired of me yet?"

He always wants us to be close, and then he complains when he can't see or touch me for a day.

He glanced at the bed and then returned his gaze to me. He also bit his lip.

"Why would I get tired of you?" he asked with an air of annoyance.

"What if I won't attend my meeting? We'll lock ourselves in our room and wait for the time," he mischievously suggested, so I playfully slapped his arm.

"What are we going to do here?" I asked, pretending not to know what he meant.

He kissed me passionately. His kisses were intense, and I could feel the heat emanating from his hands, sending shivers down my body.

"L-Lanvin," I gasped as he moved his kisses to my ear.

"You have a meeting," I protested, tilting my head to give him access.

He seemed unfazed by my words and instead slipped his hand inside my clothes.

"Oh..." I moaned.

After one hour.

"Huhu, you're going to be late," I said to him as I helped him get dressed. I was already wearing a robe.

We had gotten intimate, and it made us stay longer, cuddling even after we should have left for lunch.

"Relax, wife," he said with a smirk.

"Hey, calm down," he chuckled as I struggled to button his shirt properly.

He held both of my hands.

"Damn, I'm gonna miss you," he said, pulling me into a hug.

"Hubby, you can hug me later," “You smell after sex," he commented as he nuzzled his nose against my neck.

"It's your fault!" I said, feeling embarrassed.

He chuckled sexily.

"Please, can't I skip work? Let's stay in our room and cuddle."

"You're so lazy. How will we raise our children if you don't work?" I blurted out, realizing a bit too late what I had said.

"Aren't you pregnant yet?" he asked, placing his hand on my stomach.

I fell silent at his question.

"I'm excited to be a father."

"I might be infertile. But the Lord will give it to us in His time," I tried to comfort myself.

"Now, get dressed. We'll see each other later," I changed the topic.

I didn't wait for him to respond and quickly got ready.

He wanted to wait for me, but I told him we would meet later in the afternoon with Heidi.

By three o'clock, Heidi arrived at the Zero Litre Cafe. I had arrived earlier since she still had work.

"Are you coming to consult with me?" she asked as she dropped her bag on the chair next to her.

I handed her the coffee I had ordered for her.

"I love him, Heidi, I'm falling for him so hard," I said, pouring my heart out to her.

"So? He's your husband," she said casually, tasting the coffee I ordered for her.

I had a matcha latte.

"I can't love him. You know the reason, right?" I replied.

"Leave him then. I told you from the beginning not to start if you can't handle the consequences. I didn't skimp on warnings," she said matter-of-factly.

"No, I don't want to love him. But I'm falling for him. What if we have a child? What about the baby? I'm not ready for everything, Heidi. What have I gotten myself into?" I said, feeling close to tears.

"He loves you, right? Leave him," she said, as if it were that easy.

Sometimes I didn't want to talk to Heidi because of the way she answered me.

"Didn't you plan to leave him when he falls for you? Why haven't you left him yet? Because you still love him," she confidently said. She was the only one who could answer my questions.

I fell silent and took a sip of my matcha latte.

"The situation is getting more and more complicated," I admitted to her.

"If you had already left him, you wouldn't have any problems now. Will you still wait for him to find out the truth? Will you wait until you fall for him again? I thought you were brave, Azaria?"

"I am brave. I'm just confused about my feelings. Because the way he makes me feel seems real. I feel like I want to give him a second chance—to start over with him."

"The decision is yours. No matter what I say, you'll still follow your own path, right?"

"Heart or mind?" I asked her.

"Listen to yourself. Only you can answer that. You know yourself best. I'm here to listen. I may not agree with what you want, but I owe a debt to your family, so I have no choice but to entrust my license to you."

What does Heidi mean?

Is she trying to guilt trip me?

I didn't dwell on her words too much, thinking she might just be lacking some affection.

"I already broke up with him when we had a fight, but he got angry. He doesn't want to let me go."

"If you want to break up with him, you can. The only reason he doesn't want to let you go is because you give him that reason."

Heidi is right.

"Whatever," I told her.

"It is what it is," Heidi said simply.

~

"Azaria, we finally meet you!" Charles greeted me, about to hug me when Lanvin pushed him away.

"What the fuck are you doing?" Lanvin asked his cousin, his eyebrows furrowed.

"Greeting your wife. Why?" Charles innocently asked.

"Are you dumb?! She's my wife, why the fuck are you hugging her!" Lanvin growled.

I heard Lanvin’s other cousins laugh.

We were at the airport, waiting for our flight.

It seems like his cousins are close to him as well.

I also met Ysabelle, who was quietly standing to the side, hugging her cousin Xyrile.

"Someone is jealous!" Keith announced, and their cousin made a noise.

"What the fuck are you doing?" Charles said to him.

"Are you dumb?! She's my wife, why the fuck are you hugging her!" Lanvin growled.

I winced at what Charles said.

"Who? I don't remember I hugged one of your women," Lanvin replied with annoyance, wrapping his arm around my waist.

"Of course you don't remember, you have so many women," Charles teased and laughed.

I looked at Lanvin, who was shooting Charles a death glare.

"Fuck you!"

After hours, we finally arrived in Croatia. It was already late at night.

"Let's eat outside!" Xyrile suggested.

"I want to go to the shopping mall, but I'm tired already," Ysabelle complained.

"Damn it! Let's just eat at the hotel," Keith suggested.

"I still have energy. I want to go to a bar," Charles said.

We were walking towards our designated rooms.

"Are you okay, wife?" Lanvin asked me.

"I'm fine," I replied and smiled faintly.

"I'll give you a body massage later."

"Hey! I heard that!" Xyrile exclaimed.

"And you, Lanvin. Aren't you giving yourself a break?" Xyrile added.

"Stop being nosy," Lanvin retorted.

"They are married, there's nothing wrong with it. The question is, why haven't they had a child yet?" Keith playfully asked, causing their cousins to cheer again.

"Seems like my chicken is weak," Xyrile said, hooking her arm around Lanvin's.

"Tsk! Stop teasing us!" Lanvin said irritably.

"Let's rest. We'll see each other tomorrow," Lanvin announced, stopping in front of a door. Our rooms were next to each other.

"Who wants to join me at the bar?" Charles asked.

"Me, me! But I'm tired," Ysabelle raised her hand and pouted.

"Fuck you! Let's go out tomorrow. I want to sleep," Xyrile replied to him.

We entered our room, and I let Lanvin arrange our things.

"It's fun being with your cousins, right?" I started to create a conversation.

He didn't answer and just furrowed his brows.

"Ysabelle is your cousin, and we had a little disagreement. Why didn't you tell me that you're related?" He shrugged and went to the closet to put away our clothes.

"Xyrile is cute too, she's so small. She and Charles are always bickering," I commented.

"Yeah."

Why is he so stingy with his answers?

"Take a bath and go to sleep," he said grumpily, making me frown.

"Is there a problem? You seem cold," I asked.

He stopped what he was doing and faced me.

"Do you like Charles?" He asked directly.

"What are you talking about?"

"If I hadn't come earlier, you would have let him hug you," he said with raised eyebrows.

He checked the flight schedule, so he wasn't there earlier.

"It would be embarrassing to push him away, right? And he is your cousin," I reasoned.

"I'm your husband! Am I not enough? Do you want other men to hug you?" He raised his voice at me.

"Don't tell me you're jealous of your cousin?" I asked in disbelief.

"Who wouldn't be? And you keep on talking to Xyrile!" He gave me a glare.

"Don't talk to my cousin, they're playful," he threatened.

I laughed. I didn't expect him to be so honest with his feelings. He's cute when he's jealous. He even gets jealous of his own cousins. No wonder he seemed annoyed earlier, and his cousins were teasing him.

"Why are you jealous of your cousins? And besides, what's wrong with talking to them?"

"We shouldn't have come with them," he said, shaking his head.

I got up from the bed and approached him.

"Hey! Don't be like that. They won't take me away from you. I'm not beautiful enough to be their type," I held his hand to calm him down.

Usually, we'd be shouting at each other by now, but he was calm. He just couldn't talk to me.

"Don't you want us to be close?" I asked again.

"It's not about that. Your attention is on them, you weren't talking to me or looking at me," he said with a pout. I laughed.

"I'm sorry," I said softly and hugged him.

"Sorry is not enough. I need a kiss."

He can be so dramatic.

I kissed him without hesitation.

What was supposed to be a quick peck turned into a lingering one.

Lanvin pulled me close to him and carried me.

I knew where this was heading.

I'm dead! I forgot to bring my pills. And I'm sure I'll have a hard time buying them here because he won't leave my side.