Chapter 18: Chapter 18

Zaira's POV

"Aramis?"

His tall stature took up the entire room as he crossed the threshold and the door closed behind him, at least that's how it came across. He walked toward me with his lithe gait, while I stood there, completely frozen, staring at him.

did i dream

Am I so crazy now that I'm hallucinating? That's how it had to be! But no matter how many times I blinked and pinched my arm, it didn't go away, but kept moving in my direction.

Time seemed to have stopped and I couldn't think straight anymore. The world no longer existed for me, all I was aware of was the presence of my mate. My breath hitched as my heart pounded against my chest so hard I felt like it was going to jump out.

My gaze wandered from his strong legs up to his upper body, which was so muscular that his black leather jacket was stretched, up to his face. His clenched jaw hardened his already striking face even further, with his tousled dark brown almost black hair in stark contrast. I imagined what it would be like to run my fingers through that silky mane and ruffle it even more.

I sighed internally.

His green eyes fixed me intensely and it was like I had been struck by lightning. The air around us was charged with energy and I could swear I heard a crackle.

I was so absorbed in his gaze that I hadn't even noticed how close the distance was between us. We weren't even six feet apart and since it looked like he wasn't about to stop, I backed away. However, I didn't get far, the kitchen counters stopped me from doing what I was doing, so I had to be content with being forced to press against them.

Inside, my she-wolf stirred when I smelled his scent. She whimpered, both in joy at having her mate with her and in anguish at not being quite with him. All my senses were focused on him, urging me to touch him, snuggle into his arms and rub my nose on his neck. The pull on our fine ribbon of mate became stronger with every second that passed in which he was so close to me, and only with difficulty did I manage to cling to the counter and not to throw myself on him.

With a raised eyebrow, he had to call me. I could only imagine what kind of image I had to make. A tense girl, pressed against the kitchen counter, staring at him with big purple eyes wide with shock and her hair, tossed by the wind, standing tangled on her head.

The holes.

Contrary to my suspicion that he would close our distance even further, he leaned against the kitchen island and folded his arms across his chest. Normally I would describe such an attitude as casual, but looking at him like that the word didn't come to mind in the remotest sense. He looked anything but casual. He didn't tense his muscles, but I wasn't stupid enough to think he wasn't ready to attack at any moment. His dominance was palpable and his whole presence exuded authority, which intimidated me quite a bit. How could he not intimidate me, he was a damn demigod!

Or at least I dared to believe so.

I wondered why he had come back. Was the mate tape getting on his nerves so he wanted to get rid of me for good? Or was he drawn back to me, had he changed his mind and wanted me as a mate? My treacherous heart beat faster at the thought and I cursed it for it.

"Are you Serda's ally?" His question snapped me out of my thoughts instantly.

No, hello Zaira. No, how are you? No, I'm sorry I left you with a bunch you don't know anyone!

Anger and frustration simmered inside me, though his actual question never got through to me.

Of course he didn't apologize to me! What was I expecting? That he came crawling up and begging for my forgiveness? Oh, I didn't laugh! I was so naive, so stupid!

But no matter how much I hated myself for it, my heart wouldn't let it affect me, it still beat just as fast under his gaze, raising hope where there shouldn't have been.

"I'm not going to ask you a third time, little wolf, are you Serda's ally?" His deep voice was now more of a growl than anything else and made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up instantly. The temperature dropped degrees while the same chill reflected in his eyes. I thought I already knew the dark, unfeeling Aramis, but this one in front of me was far worse than the one I already knew. There wasn't the slightest hint of warmth about him, like he could murder me in cold blood at any time, and he wouldn't mind in the slightest.

I was getting scared. Sweat ran down my back as I gripped the stone slab even tighter.

What else had he asked me? Was I Serda's ally? Serdas? Who the fuck- Oh! Suddenly I realized who it was, Gaia's son, his cousin. But why on earth would he ask me to be his ally? If this weren't such a serious situation, I would laugh at the absurd question, but I decided now was clearly not the best time.

His gaze didn't let me out of her grip for a second, which only put more pressure on me. I attributed it to my ever-growing panic that I was now saying the dumbest thing of all.

"Was?"

"I told you, not a third time." Within seconds he was right in front of me and supported himself on the left and right of the kitchen weft, so that I was now literally trapped.

My breathing quickened as I tried to pull away from him even more, to no avail. His face was now only a few inches from mine, so I could feel his breath on my skin. Goosebumps covered my whole body as my heart jumped, as did my wolf. She rubbed against my skin, urging me to take control, finally marking her mate. Her need for it became so strong that she angrily scratched at the inner walls and tried to get out.

"I want an answer wolfie!" he whispered softly in my ear, his mouth pressed so close to my ear that I thought I could feel his lips. With legs reduced to pudding, I gasped and tried my best to brace myself on the counter, the last thing I wanted was to embarrass myself even more. My throat was so tight that I couldn't utter a single sound. His face reappeared in front of mine and my gaze darted from eye to eye, searching for whatever I was hoping to find. But I couldn't find anything. The only thing in those beautiful green eyes was icy darkness. He didn't feel the slightest bit for me, not a single spark of affection or anything like that.

His chest was so close to my body that I could feel the vibration of his angry growl, reminding me he had asked me something. My throat still felt like the Sahara itself, but just for the sake of my submissiveness I could do nothing but answer. I was too scared to disagree with such a dominant wolf.

I knew that he didn't use his dominance over me - otherwise every chance of trust would be gone, my wolf would behave towards him like any other dominant wolf, with irrepressible subservience. I would have no choice but to submit when he ordered me, otherwise I ran the risk of challenging him, and that would definitely not end well for me - yet I had been in captivity too long to find the courage to challenge him .

His hand traveled up my back and wrapped around my neck. I tensed up so much that I now stood stock still. All it took was a move on his part and my neck would be in two. He might have been my mate, but things had changed in that regard, I couldn't be sure he wasn't hurting me anymore, not after what I found out at school today.

His pupils suddenly dilated and his wolf eyes revealed, which meant that he was using his powers and I realized that he knew full well whether my answer was a lie or not. His wolf hearing could hear my heartbeat with no problem, and as soon as there was even the slightest irregularity, he would notice it. If that were the case, I was sure that this was my last breath. However, I didn't tell him that all of this was unnecessary and that my pockerface was really just a joke.

"No." I whispered.

I held my breath spellbound as I waited for him to say something. But he just stared at me as if he expected me to change my mind and answer "yes" to the question. I didn't know how much time went by just standing there and looking into each other's eyes, but I was sure I didn't want us to stop. For the first time in a long time I didn't feel quite so lost.

He exhaled and closed his eyes for a moment. When he opened them again, I thought I could read relief on his face.

However, this small intimate moment was roughly interrupted and I wanted to groan loudly.

"Zaira, are you hurt?!" I jumped as Samanthas burst in with Isaiah.

Aramis' entire body tensed, but he didn't turn around, instead continuing to stand with his back to the door, his arms still positioned to my left and right, and he made no move to change that. I tried ducking under his arms, but he quickly grabbed my waist and stopped me.

My head snapped up, startled. This touch, albeit a small one, caused an inner short circuit in me. His hands were warm and wrapped around me so gently that I shuddered.

He slowly shook his head. "You stay with me.", his voice vibrated deep and rough. His eyes were still his wolf's and I could feel him just beneath the surface.

"Hey!" Isaiah yelled as there was a loud crack. I struggled against his grip, but as it grew tighter the more I tried to free myself, I stood on my tiptoes and looked over his shoulder. The alpha couple were pinned against the wall and couldn't move.

"Let her go Aramis, or you'll experience something!", mad with anger, Samantha tried to move, but she couldn't when she suddenly had trouble breathing and she, as well as Isaiah, gasped. Instantly forgotten was the fact that in front of me was the strongest and most dangerous werewolf in the whole world, who had murdered countless innocent people. Only Samanthas and Isaiahs mattered, the people who had adopted me into their pack were nicer to me than anyone had been in a long time and cared for me so much that they would even take on Aramis. If I hadn't been so panicked, I would have shed tears at that fact.

With a jerk, Aramis put me back on the floor. I pushed against him, trying to get to Samantha, but even if he just grabbed my waist, he was just too strong. I could still hear the two of them trying to get enough air when I put one and one together.

Thinking back now, the only logical reason I suddenly felt so brave was because it wasn't my life that was being threatened. These two werewolves had given me so much that I grew to love them in just a few days. I couldn't let them get hurt because of me. I couldn't, and I wouldn't. And the fact that my wolf didn't have to submit to Aramis like any other dominant wolf since he was her mate also played a big part.

"STOP!" It was the first time I had yelled at someone in 13 years. As soon as the words left my mouth, I stared wide-eyed at Aramis. Surprise flickered briefly in his eyes, followed by amusement.

"So the little wolf still has claws, doesn't it?"

My fear was suppressed by seething anger. Did he think that was funny?! The only people I cared about and started to trust were fighting for their lives right now - not forgetting him - and he thought that was funny?!

I could picture Samantha arching her back and lifting her chin whenever she insisted. So I did the same thing, straightening my back and raising my chin so that I was looking straight into his eyes.

"Stop that right now!", although I didn't scream this time, my voice was louder and more assertive than I ever dared. Nothing happened for a few moments, he met my gaze indifferently and I held my breath. Slowly - it almost seemed like slow motion - he pushed me against the counter and approached me even closer, his rough hands still exerting gentle pressure on my waist and it tingled in all the places where he touched me. Now our distance was so small that our bodies almost touched. My heart was pounding, my cheeks were flushing, and I was hoping he wouldn't notice as I had to lean back to see his face.

As soon as I heard my alphas sigh, I let out my held breath and sighed in relief, while a part was far too surprised it actually listened to me.

"Now let her go." I could only hope that he would continue to listen to me, even if I was puzzled how to do that.

"Get out of here, that's my and Zaira's business." Although he was speaking to Isaiah and Samantha, he didn't take his eyes off me for a second. My heart was beating so hard I felt like my chest was going to explode.

"We won't leave her alone with you! She's part of the pack now, so she's one of us, that's what you wanted yourself!" Now it was Isaiah who spoke. I clearly heard the Aplha speaking out of it, using his dominance to show him that he was now dealing with the strength of the Silverstorm pack and each one would stand up for me. Touched and shocked in equal measure, I was about to contradict him when Aramis got there first.

"SHE'S MY MATE, SHE'S MINE!" , he thundered. Now he also added his full authority and there was no question who was the stronger of the two, his dominance filled the whole room. My wolf was delighted with the strength of her mate and growled furiously. I knew that Isaiah and Samantha didn't feel the least bit, in fact, they struggled not to offer their necks and submit to him. But even though I was worried about Isaiah and Samantha, I couldn't get out of my shock.

I belonged to him?

What the heck was with:

"I DON'T WANT YOU! AND I NEVER WILL!"

I couldn't forget how much he hurt me. He had fucking rejected me!

So why should he say something like that, it just didn't make any sense!

And did I even want him? A demigod, a lycan who had caused a massacre? How many innocent lives did he have on his conscience? Did I really want to be with someone who had the blood of an entire population on their hands?

I wish the answer to that was no, everything would be so much easier if I only hated him. But I would only be lying to myself if I said that.

My mind raced and I tried to find answers on his face. Some indication that he was serious, that he really wanted me. As the little spark of hope grew, I sank into his eyes and lost myself completely in them, without getting the answer I wanted.

"Either you leave now, or I won't spare you any more this time." He hadn't changed his position and still turned his whole body towards me as if he was afraid that I would run away from him. What an absurd idea, considering he could immobilize me at any time anyway.

When neither Samantha nor Isaiah agreed to go and I had the feeling that Aramis was not far off, I spoke up. I realized that only I could get her to leave and not throw herself to her death.

"Isaiah, Samantha, I'm fine, I'm fine. You can go, I'll be fine.", I tried to look over his shoulder, but this time I couldn't, he was so close to me that I couldn't could move without touching it. And while that may have been one of my greatest desires, an inner wall kept me from getting any closer to him. He had hurt a part of me so badly that I feared going through that pain again and maybe never recovering from it.

My wolf went completely nuts, she couldn't understand how I could be so close to him and not touch him, not sniff him, not tag him. I felt her claws trying to break out of my fingertips, I had to force them aside with all my might or I might be doing all these things.

"Zaira, I meant it when I said we won't leave you alone," Isaiah stated, which only made me even more determined not to want her here. I would never forgive myself if anything happened to them.

"Let me see her," I whispered to Aramis. "Please."

As if he just needed to hear that magic word, he leaned on his side and just let me see as much as possible without having to take his hands off my waist. I raised my eyebrows in surprise, wow, that went faster than I thought. But before he could change his mind, I started to answer.

"I'm fine, really. Thank you, thank you for everything, but don't worry, I can handle this on my own," I said softly, back to normal. I realized that Luna obviously wasn't content to leave me here alone and didn't want to listen to Aramis in the slightest. But Isaiah saw that I was serious and didn't want them here, if only for their safety. Or so I told myself, anyway.

I nodded to him. "Goes."

Isaiah took the struggling Samantha by the arm, pulled her out and closed the door. We heard them calling out and arguing until the voices grew quieter and finally fell silent.

"Well, happy Wolfie?" His eyes sparkled with amusement again and he leaned back against the kitchen island. I breathed a sigh of relief and my muscles relaxed a bit now that we weren't so close, but I found his amusement ridiculous! Who could find something like that funny?

My thoughts must be written all over my face, because his eyes burned even more at my rising anger, and the redness on my face was no longer due to my usual embarrassment.

I was fed up with constantly arising mysteries and uncertainties, didn't want to ask myself the same question over and over again. I clenched my hands into fists, trying to hide my nervous trembling and at the same time draw strength from it. Now that I was alone again, people I cared about weren't being threatened, and the adrenaline was wearing off, I didn't feel as brave.

"Why are you here Aramis?" The small glimmer of amusement disappeared immediately and it was as if a cold layer of ice surrounded him. His face went back to that numb mask and I wondered how I could have thought he was enjoying himself seconds ago.

"Because you're coming with me."