Chapter 5: Chapter 5

: Miracles

→Narrator: Kam

We arrived at the beach where the celebratory bonfire party was going on. Everyone said it was because Jemi, our star three pointer, had totally pulverized the other team.

But that was a lie. A cover up. A party was going to be thrown whether we won or lost. There didn't have to be a reason.

I parked the car on one side of the dirt road. As we walked down unto the beach, I flinched as Asa shrieked.

"What?" I asked her.

"Everyone is half naked."

I arched one eyebrow at her. "Have you ever been to the beach before?"

She folded her arms stubbornly, refusing to answer me.

"I'll take that as a no. Well, Asa, it's normal to walk around in swim suits on the beach."

She stuck her tongue out at me defensively, digging her toes into the sand and I caught the sight of scars, like handprints, around her ankles. They were faint but still visible.

I avoided my gaze, curiosity slamming inside me.

Feigning a sigh, I told her, "You don't have to take your clothes off."

"But I'll look so awkward," she protested.

"If it helps, I'm not taking my clothes off either."

"Promise?" She asked, almost childishly, bringing out her pinky finger.

"Pinky promise."

Our fingers clasped.

"Finally!" Kosi's shrill voice sounded nearby. I turned around to see her stomping towards us. She had changed into a bright pink bikini, a sheer wrap skirt, wrapped around her shapely hips.

Kosi had this imposing aura that arrested eyes and attention from others. She walked with that self assuredness of someone who was attractive and knew she was attractive. With razor sharp smiles, bold strides and strong confident eyes, daring the world to challenge her. Her dark, dark skin was the glossiest I've ever seen. She was the quintessential Melanin Goddess.

People around school called Kosi, Kosi Kardashian, because of her huge social media following and curvy shape. Sometimes, everyone called her an Instagram whore, because she was one of those girls, who weren't exactly high-fashion models in the real sense, but were asked to model for big brands because of how popular they were.

Nobody ever said it to her face, though, because they were all a little intimidated by her. She could fit into any clique she wanted, but even with her star status, Kosi only kept to her bestfriends and didn't mingle with the rest of the student population unless she really wanted to.

"I've been waiting for so long. I thought you guys had an accident."

"Sorry. I took a wrong turn."

She sighed, shaking her head. "There's a bonfire going on and an actual sharwarma and barbecue stand. Do you want to eat? We could get in the water after that," She said to Asa.

"Actually..." Asa licked her lips reluctantly. "I want to hang out with Kam for a while."

A devilish grin splitted Kosi's face. "Sure. Who am I to cockblock my best friend? Knock yourself out."

"What?!" Asa's eyes bulged. "He's not... We're not... It's not like that!"

But Kosi was already walking away.

I turned to Asa, about to suggest we get some barbecue and booze when a hand clapped around my shoulder.

"There you are!" Piercing grey eyes acknowledged mine. "We were worried you'd bail on us."

Amir was the closest friend I had since I got here. Coming from a long line of northern royalty, he was an actual prince in our modern age and his father was the Sultan himself. He was the voice of calm reasoning and perception that usually stopped me from doing stupid shit.

I shifted and he stopped in his tracks when he saw that I was standing with Asa.

He gave a pointed look at her as if asking, what are you doing with her? For some reason, Amir seemed to think that she was a snob, uptight even. He, along with most of the other student population fell back on things they've heard about Asa. The rumours swirling about her. Nasty rumours. And it was because of this reason, he stubbornly didn't acknowledge her.

Leaning heavily on Amir was Jordan who was obviously wasted, seconds away from passing out.

"Kam, my man! Great party, huh. Did you get me more booze?" Jordan bellowed.

I scratched my head. "I think you've had enough to drink, Dan. You don't need anymore booze."

"Buzz kill!" He pouted at me then looked at Asa. "Hey Einstein!" He grinned childishly.

"Hi, Dan." She waved at him, more dismissive than welcoming.

"You know each other?" I asked her, not seeing this coming.

"Yeah." She told me. "He used to hang out with Kosi before and I helped him with his holiday project last summer so he kept in touch."

"She saved my fucking life, man. I didn't know shit about robotics and mechanics and I came out with an eighty two percent. My mom was so proud. That's why she got me that new Benz I wanted."

"Wow. Good for you," She said, almost uninterested.

His grin turned wider, not catching her bored tone. "We should go for a spin sometime. You, me and Kosi. The three of us. Let's ditch Jemi. You like ice cream? We could get ice cream and-" he swayed, in Amir's arms, nearly falling over.

"Careful, Dan. Don't throw up on me again!" Amir warned.

"That was one time, asshole! I know you won't let that go!"

"He's right, Dan. You don't look so good."

He looked like he was about to pass out for a week.

"That's not what your mum said the last time I visited, so that's cap! I look fucking amazing!"

I facepalmed myself and Amir just sighed and shook his head before looking back at us. "I'm taking him home. He's about to pass out any second now."

"No I'm not!" Jordan protested.

But almost immediately, Jordan's head rolled back as his knees buckled, falling unconscious.

I moved in to help Amir carry him as Asa looked on, worried.

"Will he be okay?"

"Yeah." I grunted under his heavy weight. "This happens all the time. You get used to it after a while."

We maneuvered our way through the beach as I high-fived several people that came on Amir and I asking if I was enjoying the party.

Yeah, it was kind of hard to do with a passed out bear leaning on you. Jordan had ballistic missiles on his arms and chest, as if he worked out while he slept.

We got Dan safely to the car and I watched as Amir strapped him to the seat.

"Shit!" Amir swore, frowning at the sleeping beast and looking like he wanted to kick him. "He'll drool all over my new leather."

"Glad to see you've got your priorities straight."

"Fuck you, man." Amir laughed, walking over to the drivers side. "Make sure you make it to school tomorrow. This party is not an excuse to miss school."

"Sure, dad!" I replied aptly.

He flipped me the bird, starting the engine and driving off.

"Friends of yours?" Asa arched an eyebrow at me.

"Best friends of mine."

"The other one, Amir, doesn't like me," she said it calmly. Inherently.

"You know his name?"

"Everybody knows everybody in this school. We just don't vibe with everyone."

She was looking away from me. A cold look in her eyes. Twisting her charm bracelet distractedly.

"Amir is just... "

"You don't have to say anything. I understand. I know that people talk about me behind my back."

And because of that, I didn't tell her that although not everyone knew her name at school, although she didn't talk to most kids at school, she was called 'The Ice Witch' by everyone behind her back. And there were rumours, nastier rumours, revolving about her.

Some said she had blood on her hands. Some said she tried to kill a man. Some said she killed her own father and could curse you just by looking at her. Some said she brought bad luck wherever she went.

But to me, she just looked like a very sad girl. Who has been strong for too long.

I gulped, swallowing all this down. "Let's find something to eat."

Soon, we were settled on the hood of my car, eating barbecue chicken and drinking beer.

Well, I was drinking beer. She refused to have anything to to with that 'vile evil' like she called it and insisted on getting a soda.

"So what's it like, being everybody's golden boy?"

"Everybody's golden boy?" I looked at her after gurgling down some beer.

"Yeah. Everyone likes you."

I shrugged. "I don't know. I never looked at it like that. I just enjoy the company I get."

In the distance, the bonfire seemed to get brighter as some of the guys poured beer into the fire, feeding it with plastic cups and nylon wrappers.

"But you don't call them friends, do you?"

"Na. Friends are reserved for people closest to me. I have to have tasted your mind at least once, to call you my friend."

"I don't see you tasting Dan's mind. He seems kind of..."

"One dimensional?"

She nodded, pulling her legs to her chest, resting her cheek on her knees, those coffee brown eyes, seeking mine.

I laughed heartily. "Dan has his days when he gets philosophical."

We watched the bonfire for a while, sipping our drinks.

Once in a while, guys would come up to me, wanting me to join the others to play football or engage in a drinking contest, or just be there. But I refused them every time, not wanting to leave Asa.

I'm not yours to save, Kam.

A sharp, crippling pain crippled me, breaking my resolve into pieces. I held the beer bottle in my hands, nearly giving in to the pain. The sadness that tore my heart to shreds.

Save that superhero complex for someone who needs it.

I raised the cold bottle of beer to my lips, took a small gulp and allowed the booze to numb my system. I gulped again. Another. Another. Another, until my hand started trembling.

Within minutes, I forgot what I was even drinking to forget.

I leaned back unto the hood of the car and blinked up at the night sky. So calm. So beautiful. It felt like a different dimension. Hundreds of light years away.

Stars dotted up the sky. Shooting stars whizzing back and forth. A half moon stood in the middle of it all, glowing generously, raising the tides of the sea with its powerful gravitational pull.

"What are you looking at?" Asa's voice jeered me back to reality.

I looked at her. Into those disastrous brown eyes that reminded me of plane crashes, thunderstorms and cities on fire.

"The stars."

She snorted and rolled her eyes.

"You're not a fan of star gazing?"

"No." She said. "It's useless and a waste of time."

"So you're one of those pessimists?" I mused, folding my arms and acknowledging her. "I swear, the world already has enough of you."

"I'm not a pessimist. I'm a realist." She corrected, with a flourish and needless pride, I'd soon get used to.

"So?" I drank again. Swallowed. Exhaled. "It's the same thing."

She rolled her eyes again but laid down beside me, eyes facing the sky. I caught the whiff of her soft chocolate scent. I breathed in deeply, realizing I liked the scent.

"Why do you do it?" She asked. "Explain to me and I'll decide for myself if it's a useless waste of time or not."

My head was spinning. I was getting drowsy. Bathed in a Psychedelic state.

"It keeps me grounded." I whispered.

"Grounded?"

"Yes. When you look up at the stars and you understand how vast the sky is. How vast space is.... How vast the entire galaxy is, you begin to understand how rare and magnificent it is to even exist. You're just one little person in an entire universe that has existed for billions of years. And you start to see yourself either as an insignificance or a miracle."

"And what do you see yourself as?"

"A miracle." I answered. "Duh?"

I didn't have to look to know that she just rolled her eyes.

"You believe in miracles? How cute."

I turned to look at her now. Her voice, dripping with sarcastic poison.

"You don't?"

"No. I don't even believe in a god. Let's start from there."

"Why not?"

"Why should I?"

I looked at her sharp chin. Her trembling chin.

There's only so much shit you can take, Kam. Before you snap.

I closed my eyes to block out her voice. To block out the memories.

The more time I spent with Asa, the more she reminded me of her.

"It must hurt." I said quietly. "Not believing in something greater than you. Always relying on your own strength especially when you realize how horribly inadequate and fickle a human being can be."

She barked a hoarse, heavy laughter. "It's for this reason, Kam. This very reason, that I don't believe in him."

"What do you mean?"

"Besides being inadequate and bounded by insecurities, Kam, human beings are also wicked and genial. Anyone that created human beings the way they are shouldn't even be allowed to exist."

"Not all, Asa. Some are nice and genuine."

"And most are predictable."

I grinned at her. "Am I predictable?"

"It's hard to know exactly what a person is really thinking... what they have in their hearts when they're smiling in your face."

She gave me a long look. A calm conviction in coffee black eyes. "But yes. I can predict what will happen from here on out."

I nodded her to continue and she did. "We were cordial tonight. Friendly even, but by tomorrow, when the alcohol clears from your system and everything is white and black once again instead of a mixture of blurred colours and muted backgrounds. When you're bounded by the rules of social hierarchy once more, you'd go back to pretending I don't exist."

I said nothing for a while. Just staring at the bitter sadness of her cold coffee eyes.

"I don't know many things about you, Asa... But I think that you're a very sad girl."

She froze, her eyes wide in shock, then she shook her head, hugging herself closer, pulling her legs closer to her chest and looking away from me.

"You don't know anything about me," she whispered after a few moments.

And she slid off the hood of the car and walked away.

She was walking away with her chin in the air and her spine straight... Even though every single bone in her vertebral column was about to crack in half from the weight she carried around on her shoulders. In her soul.

I sucked in a breath. "Asa!"

She stopped. Turned, an eyebrow quirked.

"Will I see you tomorrow?!"

This time, she smiled a sardonic smile. "That'll be social suicide, Kam. The 'rules' won't allow you."

I had to chuckle.

I exist outside these 'rules', Asa. I wanted to tell her, but instead, continued staring at her retreating figure.

And I knew... I just knew that it was impossible to be touched by this girl, to taste her soul and forget about her the next day. The next century. The next lifetime.

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