Chapter 30: Chapter 30

Chapter 29

RUBIN

The falling rain halted me on the spot as I feel the stinging pain on my chest. I furiously rubbed it, feeling my heartbeat quicken. I can feel the dizziness clouding my vision and I swayed on my feet, hissing. I fell on my knees, gritting my teeth because of the pain brought by the weeds that crept out of the dark. I rubbed at my eyes and wipe my tears angrily.

Why did I run off?

I am such a coward. I can’t even tell Caelum that I have already taken a couple of letters from his box and had read them without asking for his permission. He will clearly give me an earful for doing this but I couldn’t help myself. I am way too curious to not steal a glance.

I hugged myself and shivered.

I wish I have taken my coat before running out of the tent for it is so cold. Squaring up my shoulders, I debated about my options; if I went back to the tent and apologize, will he forgive me?

He will surely be worried if I did not return, and the forest – it is so scary at night, very far from its enchanting façade when it was daylight. I shivered once again and started tracing my way back to the tent, hoping that I will be able to find my way through the thick vines and growth, my arms and legs stinging because of the many times they were scratched by the bushes.

Caelum will be very angry once I returned to the tent.

I scratched my neck, aware of how filthy I have become, not to mention the twigs and vines caught in my hair. I tried repeating the apology I have in mind and cringed at how unreasonable and wrong it sounds, pathetic even.

It doesn’t matter though, as long as I return to him.

Caelum won’t stay angry for long for he loves me dearly, I know that he will understand. He is so vulnerable when it comes to my pleading eyes and lush lips. I just wish that my charm will still work on him though, for I never know how angry he is.

I fumbled with the button on my dress and looked around, my worry escalating for I couldn’t remember where I have gone to. I cried out in relief when the dazzling bright fire lit up a path leading to the tent. I squinted and tried to make out Caelum’s form but he is not waiting by the tent.

Is it possible that he is looking for me? Or maybe, he is eating the bread and fish alone, not bothering with me at all?

Well, the latter sounds so much like him that there’s no doubt he would do just that.

But he’s changed, hasn’t he?

I rubbed my face in exasperation as I threaded my way back to the tent, my hands sweaty and cold. I can feel my legs shaking, and I have to stagger halfway through the passage, my worry getting the best of my emotions as I bit my lip.

What if he already left? Choosing not to wait for me because he was too annoyed of what I’ve done, not even waiting for me to explain?

What if he leave me for good?

After all, I am a mere human while he remains a god, forever. He’s got a lot of powers in his disposal and I am just me – mortal and vulnerable.

What benefit will he receive from me if we continue to be together?

I will only use him to protect me so that I will be able to survive this earth. He will always be in a great disadvantage considering my limitations and because of that, I will be in his debt, until I die.

I bit my lip, hesitating. Should I really go back?

I took a deep breath and braved my way to the now visible tent, the fire blazing evermore at its opening. I gasped, feeling my chest burning as though it is being poked with a stoke.

Why did it hurt so much? It wasn’t like this before.

Deliberately, my feet brought me nearer and I tried to prepare myself of what I might see. I crouched and paused for awhile, the lack of energy brought by the pain in my chest left me out of breath. I lingered at the entrance of the tent, catching my breath before I crawled inside.

The pain dulled to a light throb as I focused my gaze at Caelum, who is also out of breath, tear streaks framing his face. I looked down to see him holding a piece of paper – a couple of drawings floating around him while the shivering letters jumped up and down as though rejoicing for being freed from the box. I crawled, cautious of what he might do to me. In an instant, the letters and drawings fell. Caelum stopped crying, and instead he reached out his hand to touch my face.

“My love,” He whispered, his fingers caressing my face. “Everything you do sends me into a wild hurricane of thoughts; your smile made me soar up to the moon, shooting me up the stars. Everything about you leaves me speechless,” I blushed, trying to hide my face from him as I process his words, looking around for any sign of liquor.

Has he been drinking?

“Never walk away from me like that again, alright?” I raised my head and gasped as I felt him drew closer.

“Never do that to me again.” He pulled me and I ended up crashing on his chest, eyes wide of what I am hearing.

Is that his heartbeat?

I leaned closer, my head resting comfortably in his chest as I listened, intent on memorizing his heartbeat. It sounds soothing and it made me think of the first time we’ve met, remembering how his heartbeat appears so unnatural.

This heartbeat sounds more natural, more him.

“I thought you’ll leave me because I have started reminding you of the past again. I’m sorry if it makes you uncomfortable. I know you are tired to listen to my stories – my longing for her…” he sighed, pulling away to inspect my face, his eyes moving down to my scratched arms.

“You shouldn’t have explored alone at night,” he stated before he tightened his hold around me, pulling me closer to his heart.

“I’m not tired of listening about the past or hear the longing from your voice,” I muttered, knowing that he is waiting for my explanation as to why I have walked out. “I’m just afraid because I am sure that you have found out about the shivering letters I have taken without asking you for permission.”

I bowed my head and sighed. Caelum untangled his arms from my body and I shivered – this is it, I am going to receive the punishment for what I did. He is going to be so mad for I have invaded his privacy without even asking for his permission.

I bit my lip as I screwed my eyes shut, “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to do it. I was overwhelmed with my curiousity and I thought those letters will help me in understanding you. Caelum, I am here, it doesn’t matter anymore because I won’t leave you. So please, please, don’t punish me!”

I waited; a minute or two have passed when he did not speak. I took a peek and frowned as I see his expression, his face red while he bites on his lip before he burst out, laughing.

“Pu – punishment?” he laughed some more, slapping his knees, “Do you want to be punished?” His not so serious voice made me relax and I thread my fingers on my hair, acting coy.

“Well, I did invade your privacy.”

He shakes his head and said, “Come and see my collection since you already had a sneak peek with those letters.” He motions for me and I took his hand, watching as the papers neatly stacked themselves at the mouth of the tent.

We settled by the blazing fire that warmed my cheeks as he pulled me closer. I rested my ear against his chest, settling close to his heart.

“Who is she?” I threw a curious yet jealous gaze at the drawings. I can tell that it was a girl judging by her plump lips and longish hair, her freckles stand out from her snow white skin. I crossed my hands over my chest as Caelum takes the papers and put it on top of his lap, sighing, “She is the most beautiful girl I have ever seen.”

I snorted and he merely chuckled at my expression. Caelum laid each paper on the ground as he continued, “She was my beginning, my end and I love her greatly.”

I snorted again which made Caelum laugh. I directed a glare at him and sighed as his laughter rang out.

“Having fun, are you?”

“Not really,” He snorted, eyes glinting with mirth, “You don’t have to appear so irritated and annoyed, love.”

I rolled my eyes and huffed, “ I have the right to do so, Caelum, for you are talking about your first love again!”

“But you and her have the same identity – you both are the same soul!”

I scratched my ears in irritation, glaring at him, “I don’t agree with you. We are both different in terms of beauty and action. I can tell how serious she is judging by her face.”

Caelum rolled his eyes at me as he continue to spread the papers that contains bits and pieces of the mysterious woman who looks just like me.

“I’ve drawn her by memory so some of it might come off a little dodgy.”

I touched one of the drawing that shows a pair of eyes whose looking at me with such admiration. “Why would you draw her even if she was only from a dream?”

He gave me a gentle smile and said, “Well, if you dream about the same face for decades, without even knowing their identity and your curiousity is burning like a blazing fire, wouldn’t it form some sort of connection? That’s how my infatuation started – my desire to search for her, for you, was welcomed to this earth. Aeon calls me a fanatic for doing this, he suspects that I’ve got a few screws that are loose.”

Caelum scratched the back of his head as he bowed, his embarrassment apparent according to the blush that graces his face.

“Did you really scour the earth to find me?” his eyes hardened at my question as he sighed, his shoulders hunched forward as though he is carrying something heavy on his back.

“I am warning you now that what you are about to hear is is a sad story but it is as true as anything that exist.” He looks at me, his eyes glistening. “It has started when I just arrived here on earth. I am greatly devastated after Hades took the parents I have known, and I am thrust into a phase where I could only keep to myself so as to protect anyone from the curse. My rage is unbelievable but Anemoi or should I say, Aeon, was there to guide me through it all.

“Years of my adulthood was spent with numerous meditations so I can control myself better. I am thankful because Aeon was there and he was patient with me, like an older brother would to his sibling and for my crucial years, I have depended on him,” Caelum smiled kindly at the memories, his eyes unblinking as he stared at the fire.

“The first fifty years of my life here on earth was peaceful. I mostly spend it at the cliff, watching over the earth as the human progress takes a toll on nature – deteriorating what I have known as my second home,” The dour expression he has, made me lean my head on his shoulder, taking his hand on mine.

“All of a sudden, the dreams came. It was bearable at first because she just looks at me as though I have stolen her precious crown; not even saying a word even when I sit across and inquired about her identity. No matter how much I tried to initiate a conversation, she refuses me as though there is a proper time for each meeting – some sort of a routine.

“Though, as the years passed, it became worse. She started crying for help, begging me to save her. Sometimes, I see her there, lying down on the earth, dead. Yet there are times where we are happy but a cloaked guy will arrive to snatch her away from me and I will be left – confused and angry but mostly hurt.”

His voice breaks and I tighten my hold on his hand, “So I draw her, part by part, just to make her tangible. I wrote her letters so I can communicate my feelings to her even in the least possible way,” His eyes drifted from the fire and to my face, his hand letting go of mine so he can tuck a stray hair behind my ear, “I roamed the earth searching for you – it was a desperate move but it is the only thing that I can do to distract me from ruining other people’s lives. Aeon tried to stop me from doing it but he regret it as soon as Rause or should I say Elise –“

“Rause? You mean –“

“Yes. Aeon met a human that made him fall in love, her name was Elise, though at the night before their wedding, she was lured, jumping off a cliff and ending up dead. Now, every time they meet in this life, the girl she becomes ends up dying in a tragic accident in accordance with her payment of killing herself before she even live the life she was meant to have.”

My face drains of any color I had come to possess from the last couple of minutes as I tried to process the words he is saying to me. So, Rause will eventually die?

The both of us will end up leaving the ones we love – how ironic!

Caelum adjusted me on his arms before sighing, “Aeon is smitten that even if it all ends up in a tragedy, he is persistent, desperately trying to chase after her – to love her even if she will forget it all once she is reborn.”

“You both are stupid.” I concluded, earning a sharp jab on my chest as Caelum tried to tickle me, smirking. He raised his hands in defeat and shakes his head.

“No comment!”

I laughed and he leaned his head on my shoulder, his hair tickling the sides of my neck. I wrapped my arms around his waist and whispered, “How long did you exactly wait for me to arrive, Caelum?” I asked, curiously looking up at him.

“About seven hundred years, I think? My letters are spaced out, the sketches more so. The lot of it was burned when the great depression happens and I have succumbed to my true nature – ruining people and their lives as I cause dthe war.” Caelum wrung his hands and pulled away, a wrinkle developing between his eyebrows as he continue, “Some of the letters I lost when I was forced to change places and forget about you. The best of the therapies I’ve yet received is tending to the field - it help me cope of your absence.”

“How come?”

“You see,” He stoke the fire and turned at me, “The forgotten field is where I was found as Aeon told me. The river down the hill, pass the dome, leads to a cliff side where I buried my adopted parents – there grew azaleas on which have captured my interest. That made me start filling the field with various flowers I use for enchantments and allurements. It is for the benefit of myself, of course, but later on, I have realized that being back at the field is like being with her,” he tightened his arms around me and kissed my forehead, “Being with you.” He kissed my forehead, and I smiled at him.

“The several hundred years of waiting is understandable to have driven you lonely and bitter, Mr. Rouen,” Caelum shakes his head, his lips pulled on the side.

We stay like that for a while, listening to our surroundings. I leaned closer to his chest, liking the sound of his heart beating against my cheeks, “I should’ve gone to you sooner,” I whispered, doubting any chance that I will be heard yet he speak.

“Though late as you are, I still fail to recognize you when you knocked on my window,” he sniffed, his nose pressed close to my forehead.

“We are both at fault then,” I murmured, burying my face on his neck. He chuckled, tightening his arms around me. “No need to dwell of the past anymore, Miss Hearthrowe.”

“It is you who keep on dwelling at it, Mr. Rouen, I am merely joining in with the conversation.” His hearty laugh made me pull back to look at his eyes. The gentle breeze move his frizz on the sides of his face and he squinted his eyes, making him appear younger.

“You don’t have to feel so vulnerable for I am here; I am with you,” my heart clenched at the words I just said, feeling like someone had dropped a ton of burden in my chest, “I’ll never leave you.”

His drawn out breath cut my thoughts off as he leaned closer – his lips a few centimeters from my face. I have gone temporarily cross eyed, blinking so I can focus on his face that is filled with that loving gaze.

The touch of his lips were gentle.

I couldn’t have registered it if I am not paying attention as to how he guided my head closer so that he can savour my lips with the intense kiss. The fire crackled and as I close my eyes, I became aware of the fact that Caelum is lowering me down on the makeshift bed – deliberate and thoughtful. I recognize the slight tremble of his fingers as he pulls away to look down at me.

“You look beautiful.” the words instantly brought a blush on my face and I hide in an attempt to appear shy, failing miserably as my hand was pulled away.

“Don’t hide from me, love.” He leans down and kissed me again, an action much braver than the first when he slipped his hand down to my waist settling down on my stomach, drawing lazy circles as he delved in deeper. It felt like my mind has gone all mushy and my body appears not solid at all; like if someone tried hard enough to lit me up, I will combust – tortured and abused by love itself.

The quick movement that follow his slow attack on my lips is just the proof I am waiting for; a confirm of how the last three hundred years of wallowing in the past and trying to forget me, was spent on experimenting with women and achieving expertise not yet known to mortals but the gods alone.

I shake my head, getting rid of this thoughts as I surrendered myself to the opportunity I was presented with, for the first and last time.

*

The surrounding seems to glow an eternal blue; gentle breeze streaming inside the tent from the entrance, revealing the detritus of the blazing fire from last night. I yawned, unable to control how wide my mouth becomes when I stretched my arms. Next to me, Caelum softly breaths; his hair thrown to the side as he lie on his left facing me.

I smiled.

The harsh rustling from the nearby trees wipe the smile off my face as I frowned – what could that be?

I slipped on a robe and gingerly crawled to the entrance only to be surprised of the golden glow emitting from the side of the tent. Tying on my robes, I looked back to the sleeping Caelum who gently stirred. Making up my mind, I turned and slowly approached the golden glow.

Robes whiter than the ones I was accustomed to see here on earth, are worn by the tall beautiful woman whose face would change from young to old on various occasions according to how she feels. She stands there by the brambles, looking regal and peculiar at the same time. She turns to face me and I was momentarily stunned.

“Fran,”

“Grandma?” I asked out loud – my voice full of confusion and doubt. I approached her, my eyes not leaving her face, “How come you are here, grandma?”

But before she can answer me, Caelum has emerged from the tent, a frown etched on his face as he registered who is with me.

“You,” The word that he has uttered is so full of hatred that I backed away from Aphrodite to stand next to Caelum. He stepped forward and protectively stood between me and her.

“Eros,” She breathed out, a gentle smile gracing her lips as she conjures a seat and sat on it. “I can see what happened here.”

She nodded more to herself than us, staring down on her lap where she has folded her hands. She’s like a sculpture; unreal and unnatural, more fiction than true.

“Why are you here?” I can sense Caelum’s anger as he gritted his teeth, clenching his jaw as though all he wanted to do is rip her head off and be done with her. He puts a protective arm around my waist holding me closer while glowering at Aphrodite.

“I have decided to pay a visit to my granddaughter since-“

“It’s not your main purpose, is it?” Caelum’s voice is dripping with suspicion as he tightened his arms around me, “Tell me – why did you really come here? State your true purpose, Aphrodite or Zeus help me, I will rip-“

“No need to be so barbaric, Eros.”

“How many times should I tell you not to call me Eros anymore? I am Caelum now.” Aphrodite gave us a curious glance before she nodded to herself, readjusting her hands on top of her lap.

“Whatever you wish to be called, you’ll remain Eros to me.” Aphrodite said, her eyes glinting with mirth. “Fate has thrown you at each other again – I will never understand how the little girl’s mind works, Fate surely loves to play.”

“I cannot help but quite agree with you,” Caelum said, nodding his head at Aphrodite which surprised me. He conjured a seat for the two of us and I snuggled close to him, curious of what Aphrodite would say.

She leans from her seat, her face shifting “I am here because of Hades. He mentions that –“

Caelum bolted from his seat as he lounges at her, his eyes wild, “You won’t get her from me!”

Caelum is shaking hard, his eyes darkening. I worriedly took his hands on mine, anxious of what he might do.

“I have scoured the earth to find her. You made us like this; it is your fault that everything happened but your role here is done. She belongs to me now - Not you, not Hades, so don’t you dare stick your nose in for it is none of your concern.”

“I’m not sticking my nose in, child,” Caelum blushed a furious shade of red at how Aphrodite had addressed him, his jaw clenched. “I am merely warning you, the both of you, of what is to come.”

“What do you mean?” Caelum adjusted me on his arms.

“Hades and I had an agreement about a millennia ago. I made a promise to him with regards to your soul, Eros. It was a promise made by a god and therefore shall be claimed and fulfilled by a god. You know the rules that hold us is higher than our power, thus it is absolute, with no such way around as you think.”

We listened to her, both anxious of the words she will utter and how it will affect us while holding each other close. “You haven’t died, Eros, when that arrow pierced you, you disappeared. You brought forth another soul that became the forgotten god, the one that brings chaos and misery. Your soul as cupid was safe and untouched by the impurity you have come to acquired by being a Dieoublie. It is lulling deep within the shadows of what you are now, until only recently when your heart started beating again.”

I stared up Caelum’s face only to realize that he is also looking down at me, his expression worried. I squeezed his hands and continue listening to Aphrodite as she speaks, “And so, Hades recognizes this fault of him not claiming what he was promised with; it is also the result of why his powers were restrained, limited. Thus we have more possessed souls hot on Rubin’s trail. They seek the soul that is promised to their master, the one that is slumbering deep, clinging to you, and whether you agree to it or not – you have to let it go.”

“So, I have two souls?”

Aphrodite shakes her head and laughed, serenely gazing at us with such affection of a mother, “That’s the only thing you caught? I have never thought my children to become dim witted over the years once they become banished.” Caelum’s mouth opened and closed at the remark Aphrodite has thrown at him.

Surely, she meant for it as a joke?

“But I-“ Caelum rubs a hand over his face and said, “How can that be possible? I mean, how can I have both souls?”

“Oh, I don’t know. Why ask me? I am merely trying to be kind by telling you about this so you can sort it out yourself. Never expect that you will receive anything from me though, for you have neglected my greatest rule, thus you have to suffer the cruelty presented by love alone. And I can’t really help you, personally, for I am far to busy matching and manipulating these Gaeans or humans as you call them.”

Caelum snorted, “Oh, don’t bother to offer some help for I will not be asking you for some.”

We watched as Aphrodite rose from her seat, her robes now turning golden.

“ Oh! Before I forget,” Aphrodite drew closer to us, suddenly worried, “I have to warn you too, Caelum. Rubin has roughly four days to live here on earth before Hades claims her. She made a bargain, you see – she offered her life in exchange of what the arrow should do.”

The bright light that ensues from her robes made us turned but it continue blinding us for a full minute.

Slowly, my surroundings turned vivid and I bowed my head, afraid to see Caelum’s face for I am sure, he was about to kill me for not telling him about the bargain I made with Hades.

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