Chapter 48: Chapter 48
Cameron's POV
When I got back from school the house was quiet, I was ending to my room when I saw Nanny Nancy.
You are home?
Yes, I just go to my room, when I am hungry I will come downstairs.
Oh! I am going out, but please, if it's getting late, you should ask Padgett to come in...
Where is she?
At the garden, she had been there all day.
Alright, I will wash up and join her. I said as I watch nanny Nancy nod, she walked through the exit door, and I run my hands through my hair, remembering Sutton's words, if I am in love Padgett, I have never been in love how can I be in love with her?
Everything happening right now just feels like a nightmare I wish I could wake up and realize it was a mere dream and everything would be back to normal, things would be just like they were weeks back not as complicated as it is right now I wouldn't be as confused as I am right now
I just want to scream and all I want right now is for Padgett to let me in, maybe, she is mad at me because of the kiss, but I only want to talk things out with her.
Maybe if I hadn't dated Cathy things would be different or maybe I made the mistake when I dated Cassie
Maybe I should just stop being an asshole and focus on one girl, I probably will.
I made Padgett cry, I heard her cry so badly, I hurt her, I thought, we will go bad to normal, just maybe, I shouldn't have kissed her like that but the truth is, I still want to kiss her.
And now my mom wants to adopt her, I hate it, I don't know the reason I don't want her to adopt Padgett, just maybe Sutton and Alex are right, I am attracted to her.
My thoughts were crowded with her memories, as I walked to the garden, her smile, her words, her childish actions when she is only in her undies around me.
When I got to the garden, I saw her lying on the floor. Have you been crying? Your eyes are swollen. I mumbled as I move closer to her.
I want to be left alone.
Come on creamy, I am...
Get off my face, and stop acting like you care.
Of cause, I fucking care.
Can you leave?
Please!
Fine, I shouldn't ask you to leave because this is your house.
That is not the truth, this is also your house and I will never say this is not...
Cameron, don't try to fool me, I know you don't care...
Come on, why shouldn't I care for my best friend? I said cutting her off.
A best friend indeed, I am... oh your best friend when it comes to manipulating me, making decisions for me, and chasing away all my friends because...
Padgett, you shouldn't think I don't care and I am only protecting, protecting you from those bastards, Newton, he is an asshole.
If Newton is an asshole what about Sutton, he is not good enough for me... I run my hand through my hair, not able to give her a reason, I just don't want anyone else around her, she is mine.
Why would I think like that she’s mine we’re best friends but mine why that choice of words
What Is wrong with me losing my mind all going crazy all because of Padgett, I need her to stay away from every boy, including Sutton.
You can't talk because you felt I am worthless, because I am not fucking good enough, because I irritated you, to the extent that you even don't want me to be around you, that is the main reason you said your parents shouldn't adopt me.
No! I didn't...
Stay away from me. She said pushing me away, I watch her walk back into the main building, I am so fucking crazy right now, so I go after her.
Padgett's POV.
I hear people say keeping your feelings to yourself will prevent you from getting hurt and it's been a fact for the past few days, I hated the fact that I can't learn to stop loving Cameron but it's okay since I could keep them all inside, I could bottle it and save myself from this madness called love, I try to avoid him like some plague, I try in suppressing all my emotions, living in this house with him, every single day, make me long more for him, when he said I shouldn't get adopted by his parents, I was staring at him but not with anger but the stupid thought that he might also be in love with me, that is the reason he doesn't want me to be his sister, I too don't want to be his sister because I love him and I can't stop loving him
But I’m scared that I might end up heartbroken and throw out if his family found out that I am in love with their son because I still love him and to hate someone you love is the most difficult thing, even though he hurt me, so many times
Just maybe, I should learn to stop loving him, I can’t love him forever, I am sure, if I leave here, sooner or later these feelings would die and I would be able to hear his name without my heart racing and my face forming an involuntary blushing like some idiot
I was still in my thoughts, then I noticed someone standing so closed
The tight space wasn't helping matters at all since his cologne filled the room and I had no other option but to look up and see his eyes that I could easily get lost in; anytime any day.
What do you want… I said as coldly as I could, I can't afford to let my guard down
You…he said simply staring at me as an involuntary gasp escaped my lips and his eyes didn't leave mine, right now, he is staring at my eyes cause I was without glasses.
It was just like those cliche romance novels I was so obsessed with reading, where the boy cages the girl in a closet and they end up making out and he confesses his undying love for her and she said a big yes. Stupid me, I was daydreaming about nonsense
What do you want Cameron? I screamed in his face trying to hide the heat in my body.
The thing is...
If you don't have anything to say, get off my way and make yourself useful. I said trying to leave as he placed both his hands on each side of the wall caging me once again, right now my back is on the wall
I don’t just need you, I want you, I missed you, I am dying slowly with your coldness and I feel incomplete … He said closing the space more.
I don't think I am the one you missed, so looking for your missing stuff and it's not me.
I need you creamy! He said closely as my breath hitched and now his breath is fanning my face.
I never thought you are an actor. I said trying to avoid his eyes claiming mine
Please just come back…
I never left Cameron, you’re being dramatic you know, get off me. I said looking away
You really can’t look me in the eyes….
Will it make any difference?
It does to me I can’t tell how truthful; if you are not looking at me, I just want to watch myself in that lovely eyes of yours
Oh really now… I said scoffing, I am going to die. Just go away, Cameron. I added coldly
Just accept the fact that this is how we are okay it’s easier that way, my body against yours... He grabbed my waist to himself. Don’t you get that you’re hurting me right now
You know nothing about hurting Cameron… I said my emotions building up, I want to push him but I just can't. You know nothing...
You think I don’t, how this hurt when your best friend turned their back on you... He said as I stared at him shocked. Your best friend becomes your foe in a twinkle of an eye Huh? Creamy, how is that far from hurt
You lose something that you treasured the most….Do you think that doesn't hurt
“But you know Padgett, that’s nothing compared to how you’re making me feel by avoiding me you aren't just hurting me you’re breaking me apart, you picking others and not me, sharing your pains with a total stranger but not me.
I’m not avoiding you, Cameron.
Yes, you are; you act coldly toward me. You mad at me, you’ve changed creamy, you stop calling me Cam...
You changed me, Cameron, I’m not the Padgett, you used to know she’s dead gone buried she won’t ever come back
Please I’m so sorry just come back
Let me go, Cameron, you have to accept things as they are, let's stop this worthless thing we call...
My words haven't finished before he captured my tiny lips slowly, but he couldn't continue at a slow pace, he pulled me closer and kissed me more deeply, I parted my lips for him to gain access to it, and his tongue slipped into my mouth, causing our taste to collide like the sweetest thing in the whole world, the taste of vanilla and chocolate mixed, our tongues rolling against each other breathlessly.