Chapter 19: Chapter 19

"Hey Ciara"

I look up and smile at Luis—he's also taking the final today. "Hey Luis

"Last minute studying?" he asks, sitting across from me on the outdoor bench.

"I'm trying but to be honest, I think I've done all the studying my brain can handle. I'm over it."

"I know, right?" He eyes me. "You look tired."

"Sleep hasn't really been a priority." I take a sip of coffee. It’s my one and only comfort about this whole situation. Not only have I been up late studying for finals every night, but Evan’s also made me go to the doctor every day. I appreciate his attention, but I know I'm healing fine, and I could really be using that time for studying. On Wednesday, I don't go to sleep until two in the morning and my final is at nine so I'm in school by seven, to try to get any last-minute studying.

"I always plan to pull all-nighters and I always end up falling asleep." He laughs. "I'm weak!"

I laugh, too. "I wouldn't be able to do it without coffee—it's my best friend."

"Flora must be jealous," he joked.

Luis and I have gotten closer since talking at Starbucks not too long ago. When I introduced him to Flora I learned they already knew each other from a previous class; he's a really cool guy. We chat for a while before making our way into the building.

"What are your plans after graduation?" he asks as we walk up the stairs.

"Work," I answer automatically. "Hopefully I can find something soon."

He hesitates, stopping outside the classroom and turning to look at me. "Would that leave you with any free time?"

I'm about to say I hope not because I need to work a lot since my family needs money, but then I realize what he's really asking, and I don't know what to say. "Oh, um—"

"Because…" he continues, scratching the back of his head. "I was wondering, you know, if you wanted to go out. With me,” he says slowly.

I smile sheepishly. "That's really sweet, Luis, but—"

"Oh, no—do you have a boyfriend?"

I shake my head. "No, just—"

"Am I really that ugly?" he interrupts again.

"No, you’re not," I say quickly. Wow, I’m really bad at this.

"You think I'm cute?" he asks with a grin.

I laugh under my breath. "Uh…yes."

"Yes—you think I'm cute—or yes—you'll go out with me?" There’s amusement in his eyes.

I stare at him for a moment, not knowing what to say. Oh, what the hell. "Yes...to both."

"Really? Great. Uh, I'll call you then?"

"Okay."

"Cool. Well, good luck on the exam."

I smile as we walk into the classroom. "Good luck to you, too."

I finish the exam quicker than I thought, which means I either failed or aced it. Hopefully, I aced it.Flora and I met for brunch after at this nice restaurant a few blocks from school; she came to see me the day after I got out of the hospital, furious I didn't call her before. I didn't do it on purpose—I just didn't have the energy to do it.

As I walk to the restaurant, I realize I’m officially finals-free and soon to be a graduate—I can't believe it. I’m relieved but I thought I would be much happier.

Thinking about being happy makes me think of Evans; he hasn't spoken about the conversation we had that night, but that’s what I expected. I understand why he's always so conservative and keeps to himself—no one wants to be vulnerable.

"Stop being pathetic, Ciara," I murmured  to myself, pulling open the door of the restaurant.Flora is already there at one of the outdoor tables. The weather is perfect today—not too chilly, not too hot, and cloudy.

"Hey," Flora says, standing to hug me. "How are you feeling?"

I roll my eyes as we both take a seat. "You don't have to ask every time you see me, you know."

"Just answer the question," she says, giving me a pointed look.

"I'm okay—good as new," I say, wanting to sound confident, so maybe she'll stop asking.

"How was your final?"

I frown. "Good, I think. Also, Luis sort of asked me out."

She smiles. "Can't say I didn't see it coming. What’d you say?"

I shrug. "I said yes. I mean, why not?"

She winks. "I'm liking this good as new Ciara.”

"How's Evan?" Flora asks after we order drinks.

"I don't know. He kind of keeps to himself." I look down.

I didn't tell Flora about my conversation with Evan—it was personal and it's not in my place to talk about his feelings.

She nods slowly. "Why don't we go out tonight? I'll invite Katty and Zara.It can be a girl’s night out." Katty and Zara are Flora’s friends; she's known them since high school and sometimes we all hang out, but most of the time I feel out of place since they've all known each other longer. I'm an outsider.

I frown. "I don't really feel like going out."

"When do you ever?"

"Good point." I say, laughing.

"Come on—it'll be fun. I won't take no for an answer."

I shake my head. "I'm really tired—"

"You'll have all week to sleep, come on." She gives me her puppy eyes. "It's been a long time since we've hung out—let's have some fun. Please?"

I roll my eyes. "You know that only works on Williams, right?"

She frowns. "Actually, it works on my dad, too."

I laugh. "Unbelievable."

"It's set then—I'll pick you up at 8:30?"

"I didn't say yes," I protested, but it's too late. She already made up her mind.

"What happens now that you're not pregnant? Are you going to keep living with him?" She asks, changing the subject.

My stomach drops like it does anytime I think about it. "I don't know."

"What do you mean?"

I sigh. "I mean that I don't know. As in we haven't talked about it and I really don't want to talk about it right now."

"Okay." She changes the subject and I’m more than grateful. After lunch, she drops me off, reminding me she'll pick me up later. She is so stubborn.

When I get to the condo,Evans isn't home. There's lasagna in the kitchen and the place is spotless, so I'm guessing the maid left recently. I'm relieved to be alone and I go straight to my room, throwing myself on the bed.

I wake to my phone ringing.

"Hello?" I answer, my voice hoarse from sleeping. What time is it?

"I'll be there in an hour!" It’s Flora

"What?" I tried to ask, but she already hung up.

I groan as I get out of bed and shower. I found a black dress—the one I wore the last time we went out on a girl’s night out—and I put it on. It goes down to my mid-thigh but it’s weird wearing this; it's been a long time since I've dressed like this. I put on the only pair of black heels I own, blow dry my hair, and put on some eyeliner and mascara.Evan’s still not home when I leave. He must be working. What exactly does he do when he’s at his club?

"Ready?"Flora asks when I get in the car.

"If I say no, will you let me stay home?"

"No," she laughs. "Come on—it'll be fun!"

"Where exactly are we going?"

"You'll see," she says with a smirk.

"I don't think I like the sound of that."

I…should have seen it coming.Flora drives us to Evan's club: Barcode. On the outside, it’s a huge black building, the word BARCODE in blue lights. I can hear the music from the parking lot, so I can only imagine how loud it must be inside. There are girls in minidresses and heels laughing as they make their way to the club; there are people kissing and hanging out outside the club. There are also two big bodyguards and a seemingly endless line out front.

“Zara knows one of the bodyguards," Flora explains, reading my mind.

"I don't think this is a good idea."

"Ciara come on. Why not? If you're nervous about him seeing you, it's pretty much impossible–there are tons of people in there. It'll be fun," she says, reaching for my hand and pulling me toward the doors.

"This is a bad idea," I murmured but let her lead me anyway.