Chapter 54: Chapter 54

Chapter 54:

Tatiana’s P.O.V

I saw him again today, by the beach, when we were playing water volleyball. He was standing by the line of trees right at the back of the beach. And then I blinked and he was gone. He was here again.

Connor.

Why was my mind playing such dirty tricks on me? I wanted to forget what happened between me and him. Two years of torture was more than enough. Then again...it hadn’t started two years ago. He had been a nice guy once, kind and compassionate. Or maybe I hadn’t been able to see behind his mask and he had always been evil. The marks he’d left behind will take time to fade away, even though there were no sign of them physically. I don’t think I could ever trust anyone the way I did him. And that’s why I agreed to this no-strings relationship with Damien.

Damien...he’d seemed distracted the whole day. He shown up to the sports area eventually, but he hadn’t participated, just stayed on the sides and sulked. I would like to think that it was because of what I’d proposed to him, but I didn’t think that was the cause. Something was bothering him and I didn’t know what to do. I’d asked for space and he had given me just that, but now I wasn't sure if that was really what I wanted as I laid in bed alone, bathed in the light of the moon coming in through the windows.

It was a quiet night today. The waves were making just the slightest noise to remind me that I wasn't home, but in a foreign land, enjoying the luxuries of fine living. But instead of enjoying the experience, I was worrying over Damien. We had spent the last ten nights in each other’s arms, so what difference would it make if I wasn't with him for one night? And it bothered me that it did matter. I missed him by my side, missed the earthiness of his scent and I missed the feel of his hands on my body.

Today the connecting door remained closed. I’d kept it unlocked on my side just in case he decided to show up but as the clock struck eleven, I was starting to doubt he would. I didn’t like feeling anxious or caring this much about what Damien thought, it just meant that I was starting to care about him too much, too soon. But was it really too soon?

Damien was a very nice man, he was caring and he always looked out for me even when we were with our friends and family. He was a great lover too, always putting my needs before his own. Was this really how a no-strings relationship was supposed to be like? I don’t think so. There was too much emotion involved on both sides to the point where Damien had acted on his jealousy this morning and I was scared that my heart had already gotten involved in all of this. That’s why I had wanted space. To save my heart from what was to come. Damien would leave and everything would go back to normal...who was I kidding? Nothing will ever be the same again, not without him. I was afraid it was already too late for my heart.

I didn’t know when I fell asleep thinking about Damien, only to be woken by the softest of kisses in the middle of the night.

Damien’s P.O.V

I watched Tia sleep, her hands on her chest and her hair spread on the pillows like a halo.

There was no doubt that she was gorgeous. In fact, she was the most beautiful woman I had ever met, both on the outside and on the inside. And it worried me. It worried me that I was starting to have feelings for her, feelings that had no place in my life.

No strings.

That’s what we had agreed on, hadn’t we? And here I was, watching her sleep in the middle of the night like some creepy old pervert and thinking about how nice it would be if this was something I got to experience for the rest of my life. There truly was no one like Tia.

But when she’s asked for space this morning, I had been shocked into silence. I was a lawyer; I was used to getting my way. I’d been all but prepared to fight on what Tia had been proposing...before I realized it wasn't my place to do so. I had been the one to suggest that we have a no-strings relationship, hadn’t I? That meant not caring about the other person outside of the bedroom. But every time I was near her, it was hard not to notice her, not to take in the little things that she did. I was afraid that the past ten days together had made me start to develop feelings for her and that hadn’t been a part of our plan. Have a no-strings relationship like adults and then move on with my life.

But then I’d seen her with her bikini top and shorts that hardly covered anything and I’d imagined how every man in that beach would look at her and instantly desire her. She wasn't skinny or thin, she had luscious curves that a man would die for. And with only the minimalistic amount of clothing covering her body, it left little to the imagination. I just couldn’t bear to think about how others would look at her. How other men would lust after her. And it had made me angry. An anger born out of jealousy.

I should’ve known right from the first time that this was bound to happen. I’d been captivated by her beauty, addicted to her just after one taste. What if I did let my guard down with her? What if I trusted her enough and she turned out to be just like Marian?

No! I shook my head, Tia wasn't Marian. And yet, I was here at her door, wanting to explain to her just why I had started this no-strings relationship. Tia hadn’t questioned me and I hadn’t bothered to explain because I had hardly slept with her twice. But we were past that now and I wanted to explain to her why I had asked so much from her. It was also true that Tia had herself agreed to my terms, but maybe coming clean would give me a clear conscience?

But standing at her door, watching her sleep, I didn’t have the heart to wake her up. So I walked over to her instead and placed a feather light kiss to her lips before turning back towards the door.

“..Damien...”

Her voice was barely above a whisper but it made me stop in my track and turn to face her. She was still in bed, propped up on her elbow, the moonlight coming in through her window casting a bluish hue on her skin.

“Sorry, did I wake you up?” I walked back to the edge of her bed but didn’t sit down next to her.

“It’s alright,” Tia sat up properly and rubbed the sleep from her eyes. “I thought you wouldn’t show up.”

“I thought you wanted space.”

Tia looked up at me startled. “You sound angry.”

“I’m not,” I finally took a seat at the edge of her bed and faced her. “I was worried I’d said or done something to upset you. I behaved irrationally today. I’m sorry for that.”

“Apology accepted. Let’s just leave it at that, shall we?” She told me now, the sleep gone from her eyes. “So are we good?”

“We are.” I told her. “But I need to tell you something...about my past.”