Chapter 29: Chapter 29
Chapter 29: A Helping Hand
Kendra’s P.O.V:
I felt the start of a massive headache even before my mind was fully conscious. Slowly, I willed my heavy eyelids to open, but it took an hour, or at least it felt like a good hour, before I could open them.
The room wasn’t flooded with light like my room usually is in the morning; in fact, it was all in a dark shade of green. That’s when I realized that I wasn’t in my room. I instantly wanted to get the hell away from this place and never look back as I run for dear life. I didn’t want to know who I was with last night and if we even ended up doing anything.
But as soon as I sat up, my vision went blank and when I opened them again after a short period, I was staring up at the ceiling. I groaned. Why did I have to be dead drunk before I decided to go home with someone? Am I even with somebody or did the cops just ditch me at a whorehouse? Nah! I was at Hellhole last night, Daniel wouldn’t let that hap...shit! Daniel!
And that’s when I remembered exactly what had happened last night.
It all came back in flashes. Watching Victor with Gina, getting too drunk to know left from right...and then Daniel!
“Oh God!” I covered my face with my hand as I realized just what I’d done last night. No hole on Earth was deep enough to hide my shame and guilt. Grace was never going to forgive me and I couldn’t even face Daniel to apologize to him.
It was when I felt a shot of pain in my right wrist that my attention finally went to that hand, and the IV linked to a saline bottle by the side of the bed. I was about to call for someone, most probably Daniel because he’s the last person I remembered being with, when a knock sounded on the door.
“Come in.” I answered after I’d checked myself for decency.
It was Daniel who opened the door and entered the room with a tray in his hands. The smell of freshly brewed coffee filled the room but along with it came the memories of what I’d told Daniel last night. I winced, covering my face with my hands. “Shit!”
“I see you’ve come to a certain realization,” Daniel said as he placed a cup of steaming hot coffee in front of me, along with some English muffins coated with butter. “Eat.” He ordered.
“I’m so sorry, Daniel.” I shook my head. “I don’t know what came over me-“
“I think we both know what did, Kendra.” He cut me off. “But we’ll discuss that later. Eat first. You’ve had nothing but alcohol in your system since last night.”
“Okay,” I said in a small voice and demolished the entire plate within minutes. I guess I was hungrier than I’d expected. “How long will this stay on?” I held up my IV infused hand as Daniel got up to move the dishes.
“As long as that bottle doesn’t stop dripping.” He motioned for the saline bottle before moving out of the room. But he came back shortly after and the look in his eyes as he took a seat at the foot of the bed, told me that I was about to get a tongue lashing. But what he said next had me more than a little unnerved.
“Kendra, you need therapy.” Daniel told me bluntly. “I know it’s none of my business and I’m probably being rude, but it’s the truth and you know it.”
I shut my gaping mouth and processed what Daniel had just said to me. Deep inside, I knew he was right. I needed help, but hearing it from someone else...accepting that...I shook my head. “I can’t.”
“Kendra, I always thought you’d be someone who faces all your troubles head on.” Daniel said gently, taking a sip of his lemon tea. “But what I saw last night, it made me realize that you do the exact opposite of it. You don’t face your troubles at all, you run from it. You run until you think you’ve outrun Karma, but in the end...”
“In the end, it just bites me hard in the ass,” I shrugged. “I didn’t know you were a shrink.”
“I’m not,” Daniel shook his head. “Just someone who has some experience in that field.”
“Really?” I asked. “And what could have possibly been so troubling for you that you ran away from it?”
Daniel pinched the bridge of his nose. “I was seventeen when my parents died,” he said. “And suddenly, my entire world changed. Me and my older brother had to shift places and move in with my uncles; everything was new, everything was changed. I had to change schools, I lost touch with all my friends, my grades dropped and I missed my parents immensely and I just...couldn’t tolerate the change. It’s funny how people thought that since I was seventeen, I’d be just fine; that I was old enough to deal with the pain. I couldn’t talk to my uncles because it would make them sad and I couldn’t talk to my friends because I sounded like a whiny loser in desperate need of attention. So I started doing alcohol and drugs.”
He held up his hand when I opened my mouth, so I stayed quiet and let him continue. “I know a lot of high schoolers do drugs and alcohol, but for me it was always the hard stuff. I got addicted to them instantly. It helped me drown out everyone else’s opinions and for once, it made me forget that I’d just lost two of the most important people in my life...until I woke up in the hospital one fine morning, making a narrow escape from death.”
I sucked in a deep breath. Did Grace know any of this? Probably not; or Grace would’ve said something by now. “And?”I asked. If Daniel was telling me all this, there had to be a moral of the story, right?
“And I realized that I wasn’t the only one suffering. Everyone else was worried about me and in doing something dangerous, I’d hurt them too.” He concluded. “Kendra, you life isn’t just your own. We make several connections all throughout our life and our lives become connected to theirs. If something happened to you, which I hope never does, but just for making my point clear, let’s say you died of alcohol overdose. But then what? You’ll be gone. You won’t feel a thing anymore because you’ll be dead. But what about Grace? Or Tatiana? Do you think they’ll be just fine, living their normal lives like nothing ever happened?”
I looked down at my lap, ashamed. No. If something ever happened to me, Grace and Ty would be devastated. They’d probably find me in Hell and kill me again. Because they cared. Because they were my family.
“I’m scared, Daniel.” I told him truthfully. “I don’t think I’m ready yet.”
“Alright, take your time.” Daniel reassured me. “No one’s forcing you to go right now, but sooner or later, you’ll have to go. I know it won’t be easy admitting your weakness, but just know I’ll be here next to you if you need support. I will support you as an older brother.”
As an older brother. The words kept echoing in my head.
No one has ever promised me that. Most men offered to only be my bed-partner, never more; and even then, I didn’t let anyone close enough to see what I really wanted. The only person who had been persistent enough is Victor and he doesn’t seem to want to give up.
I shifted my eyes to the saline bottle again, waiting for it to be over so I could finally get back home, far, far away from all the mess.
“It’s going to take a while, Kendra.” Daniel called out, but this time his tone was different. “Meanwhile, do you want to tell me what’s exactly going on between you and Tory?”
My attention snapped back towards Daniel. “What?”
“You mentioned something about him using you. Is that true, Kendra?” Daniel’s voice held an undertone of anger.
Dear God! How much have I blabbered out in my drunken state?
“No,” I shook my head. “It’s nothing like that. We...um...we’ve just....”
“Been fucking each other without Grace having the slightest clue.” He raised an eyebrow. “Since when, Kendra? You know he’s younger than you, right?”
“Yes.” It’s not something I can forget that easily. But I also couldn’t tell Daniel what exactly was going on between Victor and me. It was too new, too personal. And I felt possessiveness towards him that I haven’t felt for anyone before.
Daniel sighed. “Look, I know it’s none of my business, but make sure you don’t hurt him, okay? He is Grace’s brother and I don’t think she’ll forgive you that easily if you hurt him.”
“I know.” Just as I knew that I’ll have to end this relationship even before word got to Grace.