Chapter 32: Chapter 32

"Home?!" He got louder now and looked at me in bewilderment while he squeezed my arm even tighter with his hand. "You mean all in? To then indulge in disgusting creeps?!?!?"

His voice trembled with anger and then there was a brief awkward silence that seemed almost impossible to break and in which we just glared at each other angrily.

"What's it to you what I do for a living?" I threw at him overwhelmed and felt the warm tears running down my ice-cold cheek.

"Because I can't take it anymore!!!" he yelled at me desperately and when his grip on my arm became so tight that it hurt me, I reached out and punched him, causing him to let go of me immediately and inhaled sharply.

"Well!" I said in a loud voice, looking away from him. "But you'll probably have to! Because it's my life and I decide about it! Who do you think you are?! You don't even know me and my life!"

Angry, I said everything that was on my mind and then wiped my tears away. The louder I got, the quieter Reahlyn seemed to get, which also made me calm down a bit.

"Have you calmed down?" he asked after a while, during which I was just trying to control my rapid breathing and the anger in my stomach. A thousand questions were still swirling around in my head and at the same time I felt drained, weak and terribly tired.

"Yes," I then murmured softly, looking up into his eyes. "But I still want to go home."

He just nodded and cupped my face in his hands, running his irises over my eyes and then over my lips, making my stomach tingle despite the confused situation.

"I'll drive you and stay with you and later we'll drive back here," he said decisively, but I immediately pulled away from him and felt this outburst of anger rise up in me again.

"You just don't get it!" I snapped and wanted to pass him in the direction we had come from yesterday, but he suddenly grabbed my waist and threw me over his shoulder, which made me scream in shock.

"Reahlyn!" I yelled, slapping his back, but of course he didn't mind. On the contrary! I heard him chuckle and then let out my pent-up breath in frustration.

Kidnapped by a madman...

Only when we were back in his hut did he lower me carefully and close the door behind him.

"Now listen to me calmly," he turned to me and motioned silently with his hand for me to sit down on the bed, which I reluctantly did.

"I know what you're thinking, and no, I'm not a stalker, or crazy, or anything. I saw you in that disgusting shed and I knew right away that I needed to be there for you and-"

"And what if I don't want anyone to be there for me?" I interrupted him, fighting back tears at the feeling of loneliness that suddenly overcame me.

"I think... I even think I know that's what you want," he said softly, crouching in front of me just like before. Now it was he who looked up at me as he took my hands in his. "Just let me be there for you. You don't fit in there, it's not your destiny," he explained calmly and firmly, as if he knew exactly what he was talking about.

Now a few tears ran down my cheek and I took my hands from his to put them on his cheeks, which immediately caused a twinkle in his eyes.

"And then what is my destiny?" I asked him through sobs, suddenly wanting nothing more than to be rescued by him as pieces of my long-built wall fell away, frightening me but wanting me to dropping his arms was stronger than anything else.

Crying, almost crying, I wrapped my arms around his neck and laid my head on his shoulder while he hugged me tightly and rubbed my back comfortingly.

I didn't care if he had told his mother about us after we first met. I didn't even care that he drew me. The only thing that was still floating around in my head was his sister's sentence.

You really are prettier than all the light in the world...

After I had calmed down somewhat, hanging half in his arms and only occasionally sobbing quietly, he slowly broke away from me and looked at me sympathetically. It didn't take any more words for him to understand that I just wanted to be close to him at the moment.

Very carefully I lay down on the bed and pulled the blanket back over my body. Simply because it made me feel safe.

Meanwhile, Reahlyn got up, ran to the two small windows and drew the curtains so that very little light illuminated the room. There was enough to see, so I watched nervously as he came back to the bed and lay down close to me, staring into my eyes.

The smell that emanated from him and his room made me breathe deeply again and again and from the outside one could certainly have thought I was calm personified, but inside my blood was just rushing through my veins.

He was the first man besides my stepfather to spend time in bed with me without pay. It felt unfamiliar and I didn't even quite know how to act, but Reahlyn wasn't pushy at all either, which made me relax with a look at his face.

He carefully tucked me in, brushing a few strands of my curls out of my face, and then leaned on his arm to study me silently.

I liked the light in his eyes and also how calm he always seemed. He exuded a poise that made you feel like everything was fine in the world when it wasn't.

Unfortunately, my thoughts then drifted off again to the point that no matter how long we would lie here, I still had to get back before 8 p.m.

It was a nice thought to just stay here forever, but I wanted to be able to take care of myself and not be dependent, even though it might have been for the best for me.

"What are you thinking about?" Reahlyn suddenly asked, snapping me out of my gloomy thoughts. I felt his hand on my waist and looked at him thoughtfully.

"That I can't escape my life," I whispered wistfully and saw that he didn't like my words either. His gaze hardened and the twinkle in his eyes disappeared for a few brief moments.

"But you can change your life, Love," he spoke softly and reached up to stroke my cheek with his hand, which made me relax and close my eyes.

"And then?" I breathed almost silently, moving a bit closer to him so that I could lay my head on his chest, where I could hear his heart beating. It sounded beautiful...

"Then you look for a normal job and every evening I will pick you up and you will tell me about your day."

I heard the smile while he said that and then I had to smile about it. It was a beautiful idea, but it seemed unattainable without training. Especially in a place like Juneau, cut off from the rest of the world and only suitable for longshoremen.

"And how will my days be like?" I then wanted to know and just gave in to this dreamy illusion. It was like he was telling me a fairy tale, which made me escape from reality, at least for the time being.

"Exciting little girl. A really handsome man will bring you a great breakfast every morning. He will then drive you to your work office on his cool motorbike, where you will have your own desk full of pictures of him. He will open outside wait for you, even if you resist it, but he will love himself so much that he needs to know you are safe every single second. After he takes you back home, you'll sit around the campfire and look at each other for hours like fresh lovers, because for him you will always be the most beautiful sight ..."

I listened to him with a smile, but tears welled up in my eyes. Longing for such a life, I clung even tighter to him, so that I immediately noticed his faster beating heart, which probably reacted to my touch.

"Reahlyn?" I breathed his name then, lifting my head from his chest to get a good look at him.

He looked at me questioningly and suddenly pulled me even closer to him by my waist, unexpectedly giving me this amazing feeling in my stomach that I had never felt before.

"Do you really think I could lead a life like that?"

He immediately raised his eyebrows as if he couldn't believe I still had any doubts about that.

"Of course. What makes you think you don't deserve good things?"

"If you've been told something for years, you'll eventually believe it yourself," I replied, embarrassed, and wanted to avoid his gaze, but he took my chin in his hand and looked deep into my eyes.

"Whoever put that into you can go to hell if I take them there personally," he explained, and then he suddenly broke away from me completely and stood up in a hurry, leaving me startled.

"You know what I hate the most?!" he said excitedly, pacing back and forth in front of the bed. "That these people really made it, that you think you need to suffer and be alone! That you really think you deserve pain and rejection! But you didn't, and these assholes just wanted to break you with it you submit to them completely! I could do them all...!!!"

He undercut himself and slammed into the wall next to him with full force, so that my eyes widened in shock and I immediately got out of bed.

"Reahlyn," I tried to calm him down, putting my hand on his trembling shoulder. "It's okay. I can handle it," I whispered, knowing as well as he did that it was a lie.

Just when he was about to turn to me and I could almost feel how he had himself under control again, I heard a car pull up outside and looked curiously at the door.

"Esteban," Reahlyn growled, and he was back up to 180 in an instant.