Chapter 23: Chapter 23

I got to the trailer and slammed the door behind me to pace angrily. He had marked her. This thought consumed me and made it impossible for me to hold back the bitter tears.

I hated this guy so much that for a moment I felt like I was about to explode with anger. My entire train of thought just rushed past me like mad and my heart started to ache so much that I thought I would perish from it.

I kept seeing her face fly by in front of me like ghosts trying to force me into the abyss. Her scent faded, leaving only his, clinging to her like a penetrating perfume that made my throat tight.

"Chace?" I heard Samira at the door and thought about her intrusive manner that was driving me insane. Did she want to provoke me? Was she planning to force herself on me like that?

"Leave me alone," I yelled through the door, wiping away the tears that wouldn't stop streaming down my face.

"Please let me in", I heard her, but I didn't answer her anymore and also ignored her knocking.

I was just thinking about Lou and wondering why she had taken that step. Did she think I was over her? Why was she crying? Did he force her? If so I would kill him.

In tears, I opened one of the small cupboards and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. I had to try to numb the pain because seeing her crying over and over again while carrying his wound was like a slap in the face every time.

I took a sip and settled on the floor. Reminded me of the good times. Her laughter, her smell, her voice and our rituals. Apparently she made it easy for herself. Did she want to forget me with the mark? Should I just sink my teeth into Samira's neck too, just to escape the pain? Never. i would never love her She wasn't her .

I'd rather sit here on the floor living in the past all my life than let a marker erase my feelings. If only I had listened to my heart back then, everything would still be fine. Lou would never have left me because I was the only thing she wanted and I dumped her. The biggest mistake of my life.

I threw the bottle against the wall in anger and got up frantically to flee the trailer. Samira stood there and looked at me with tears in her eyes and Ethan also just walked out of the house towards me, but I didn't give either of them time to say a word.

"I'm leaving the pack and I don't want to be an alpha anymore!" I said trembling to Ethan, who stared at me in shock.

"Wait-"

"No!" I interrupted him, turning my back on him and running through the rain to the edge of the forest to transform. I ran and just let myself drift as a wolf. I wanted to be free and alone. Forever alone because I had nothing to say to anyone anymore.

Living as a wolf was easier, although I could still feel the pain, but it would surely become more bearable eventually, and until then I would just cry deeply to myself.

I yelped so loud I heard my despair echoing off every tree. My paws carried me further and further and I felt like I had to walk to the ends of the earth to escape her , even though I knew that the spirits of her appearance would follow me everywhere.

Trying to forget someone you love is like trying to remember someone you never met .

It had been three months since I'd sat on Ludwig's couch in complete disarray. Three months since Samira left town and three months since Chace also decided to leave.

Jayden was the alpha of the pack again and really enjoyed it. I saw him and the others more often again and things went pretty well with Alec, too. Of course it wasn't comparable to my previous relationship, but we got used to each other more and more, as fate would have it.

"Do you want something else to eat?" Alec asked me, standing in front of the coffee table with a smile.

"No thanks," I grinned at him and handed him my empty plate.

"I would take something else, I'll come with you into the kitchen."

While Ludwig and Alec disappeared into the kitchen, I turned to Isabell curiously.

"How did you actually meet Ludwig?" I asked her, leaning forward on my couch.

"Quite unspectacular. I was Darius Rudel's healer and came here after the end of the war just to look around and one look in his eyes was enough and it was all over me," she said, beaming. She looked so happy. Apparently Ludwig was her soul mate, if angels and healers even existed like that, I had no idea.

"And how do you know Alec?"

"He was part of the pack too and was quite a brawler a few years ago. I can't even count the number of times I've had to heal his wounds."

"Are you guys talking about me?" Alec came back from the kitchen laughing and sat down right next to me to put his arm around my back. I smiled at him and he gave me a loving smile.

"As if you hadn't already heard that from the kitchen," Isabell scolded him and then turned to Ludwig, who sat down on my chair and comfortably savored the lasagna.

"What are you up to today?" he then asked and swallowed the last bite to put his plate on the table.

I looked at Alec who just shrugged.

"We might want to go for a drink, would you like?"

"Actually," Alec began, looking over at me with a smile. "I wanted to spend a cozy evening in front of the television with my little one."

Isabell suddenly laughed and stood up straight away.

"We already know what that means, come on my darling," she held out her hand to Ludwig and after a short goodbye, they disappeared out of the hut together.

"One evening before the long-"

He interrupted me by leaning on me and kissing me passionately, vibrating through my whole body.

"Alec," I stammered halfway into his mouth, giggling as I try to push him off me. "The others are just out the door when they hear us."

"I don't care," he growled softly, trailing his kisses down my neck, making me groan. We've had sex a number of times over the last few weeks, but he seemed insatiable.

He pushed me onto the couch exactly the way he wanted me and squeezed between my legs to carefully pull my shirt over my head and examine my breasts arousedly.

"I'll never get enough of you," he whispered, sinking down to caress my breasts.

I turned to wax under his strong hands, stroking his tattooed upper arms until he got up and ripped my pants off and got rid of his own stuff as well. I looked nervously at the door to make sure Ludwig and Isabell hadn't left anything here and would be right back.

"Hey," he drew my attention back, and the flickering of the candle on the table just made him look incredibly handsome.

He carefully leaned over me again and I went nuts under him as I slowly felt him enter me.

By now I knew what he was standing on. The slight movement of my hips, the fact that I should look him in the eye during the climax and also the slightly harder things that were new to me. He liked to pull my hair, loved to subdue me in bed, to dominate me and I let him sometimes grab me a little harder, moaning at the same time flooded with pain and pleasure. He was just a great lover and it didn't take long for my muscles to clench as I looked deep into his eyes and he kissed my face softly, as always, as if to thank me for giving him my body .

Out of breath, he stood up and watched me gasp and smile at him.

"Let's get out of here, Lou," he said suddenly, putting on his boxer shorts.

I looked at him confused and sat up to search for my underwear as well.

"What do you mean by that?" I asked him, getting up to get dressed.

He walked towards me and put his hands on my shoulders to look down at me with a smile.

"We're going away and discovering the world together. You told me that your brother was gone for a while too, why not us too. I want to experience so many things with you."

I panicked because I had never seen more of the world than this village, but I wanted to grant his wish, so I smiled at him and nodded in agreement, whereupon he picked me up wide-eyed and laughed so heartily, all at it my body invariably tingled.

"I love you, Lou," he breathed and pulled me tightly to his chest. My smile faded, but he didn't see it. Only I knew that my next words were a lie, but I was sure that someday they could come true.

"I love you too."