Chapter 12: Chapter 12

“Who do you think was at the root of that?” He raised an eyebrow toward Daniel accusingly, not that it was fair, he had never forced him into all that just helped it along. He pulled Emma along by the hand and toward the stair to the lower deck trying to get her away from this quickly. The music was louder now and Miracle, already lying naked on a lounger, had started to touch herself. The girl seriously had no shame, and it made Jake grimace. Why he’d ever thought that lifestyle was better than this was beyond him. Looking at Emma he knew he would never go back to that shit even if he never got with her.

“So, you liked it then?” she asked looking back once more as Marissa got up and began a slow strip tease, her eyes following them. Jake ignored her and shrugged. Putting an arm around Emma to guide her and hold her up on those Bambi drunk legs of hers.

“I was young, it’s just sex. I was pretty much partying and pissing my dad off at every turn.” He tried to play it off casually, wishing he had never let her know what was going on and just whisked her off quickly. She was too inquisitive when drunk and this was not putting him in a good light at all. She stumbled on the carpeted floor and he righted her, pulling her close protectively. He could feel the effects of the alcohol more now that he was upright and the relaxed feeling moving over him fast. At least it was quelling his nerves.

“You don’t do group sex anymore?” She hiccupped, still chasing this goddamn infernal subject and he could only frown and sigh internally.

Jesus, Emma. Are you trying to ruin my chances with this?

He smiled at her in complete frustration with her line of questioning, looking skywards for a little help. She was like a dog with a bone on this and it was killing him.

“I like your smile.” She smiled, obviously instantly distracted in her drunken haze.

“No, I don’t, and I like that you like my smile, shorty.” He stopped and pushed her against the wall to steady her as he pulled his phone from his pocket as soon as he felt it vibrate, he swiped the screen seeing Daniel’s text on the front and had to hide a visual reaction.

Fuck her hard so she never wants to go back to being mates … Good luck!

He wanted to kill him about now, swiping the screen closed and shoving it back in his pocket.

“I like when you laugh like that.” He glanced up at her trying like hell to stop visualizing fucking her now, thanks to Hunter, and trying instead to focus on her sweet girly giggling instead.

Focus on her sweetness, not her cleavage, not her mouth, Carrero.

“Like what?” she asked innocently, still unable to stop grinning. He regarded her for a second then realized he had pretty much pinned her to the wall so every inch of her was against every inch of him, the hardness growing down between them in his pants was becoming a little too prominent and he shifted away.

“Unguarded … I like drunk Emma.” He pulled her off the wall and lead her to her room, he would take her there and give her one last attempt at turning him down before he would make a move. As long as all the signs were the same as the last hour then he was going to kiss her. More if she wanted but right now he just wanted to kiss her more than anything. Sex would be a bonus he wasn’t counting on.

“I like drunk Emma too,” she sighed, following him as he opened the hall door, his hand still grasping hers gently.

“I thought you said you didn’t?” He frowned at her with a confused smile. Her drunkenness was as polar opposite to PA Emma as she could get.

“I was jealous … You like her way too much.” She pouted and looked a little forlorn which made him laugh out loud. Leading her the short distance to the next door.

“You’re the same, Emma … No reason to be jealous, bambino.” He calmed his laughing, opening her bedroom door into the dark room and pulled her to the base of her bed, he had deliberately put her in a room next to his so he could be close if she needed him.

Letting her go, he sat her on the end of the bed and undid her high-heeled silver sandals, sliding warm hands over delicate feet on his knees and feeling her watching him. He knew he should switch the lights on, but he knew what he was doing in here. He was going to relax her, then he was going to move in without hesitation and go for it. No lights needed for that.

“Nooo, you like one more than the other.” She sighed. He smiled and shifted closer, so he was between her open naked legs with her dress sliding up high as she accommodated his body, nose to nose almost and practically the same height with her sat on the low bed and him on his knees. Not physically touching but he could feel that sizzle of electricity between them sparking in the darkness. He had been right about her giving off signals. He had no doubts anymore and this last little invited maneuver was sealing the deal. PA Emma would never have let him slide into her open legs so suggestively.

He reached out, touching her hair and running a hand through its silky softness, watching in the dim moonlit dark for her reactions. As expected she tilted her head toward his hand and parted her lips suggestively, her knees pressing to either side of his thighs as her body instinctively responded to him. All the things he had been watching for.

Maybe sex was an option after all.

“I like both versions of you in different ways, equally.” He sighed, trying to keep his libido under control as his blood started warming up at her obvious come-ons, keeping close.

“What do you mean ‘different ways’?” She blinked up at him innocently. He sighed, running a hand across her face lightly and moving her hair to tuck behind her ear, he chewed his lip as he tried to think of the most diplomatic way of answering her. Truth be told he was in love with every version of her, but drunk Emma let him in more than the others, he got a chance of more with her. That’s the only reason he wanted more of this version.

“PA Emma is cool and capable and she’s the best assistant I’ve ever had, she’s funny and sharp, and she’s good at what she does. I like PA Emma.” He nodded to himself, rattling off his mental tick list. Finished with her shoes, he kneeled up, so even though he was still on the floor his head was towering over Emma and his groin was not so pelvis to pelvis.

“You like her in an employee, employer way?” She reached up and toyed with his spiky hair childishly, instantly making him smile and raised eyebrows at this innocent un-Emma maneuver. Alcohol was definitely bringing out a whole new side to her and a flicker of guilt hit him in the stomach all of a sudden.

Kissing her like this would overstep the mark; she trusted him to take care of her when she was drunk, and all of this was just drunk Emma letting go a little. The flirting, the come-ons … She wouldn’t be like that sober and he was realizing how much of an abuse of her trust it would be to kiss her like this. It hit him suddenly and seemed to swamp his intentions with doubt at an alarming rate.

“Yes and no … I just like her, because she’s her.” His eyes came to rest on hers, an overwhelming feeling of disappointment hitting him in the gut.

He couldn’t hurt the relationship they had this way.

“And drunk Emma?”

“I’m a little infatuated with drunk Emma if I’m being honest.” He pulled her hand down and straightened up to leave, resigned to doing the decent thing and walk the fuck away. Taking every ounce of his inner strength to do this.

“You are? Why?” She sounded sulky, maybe sensing a change in him but he had to do this for her. She meant more than a one-night stand or awkward drunken kiss and the more he thought about it, the more he knew he couldn’t do this. Daniel was right, his head was fucked when it came to her and he over thought every single detail.

“Because she’s fun … she doesn’t guard what she says … or does.” He nodded toward her fingers, reinforcing what he was saying. Sober Emma would never have played with his hair. “She giggles and lets her hair down.”

And trusted him to not take advantage when she was vulnerable.

Shit.

“So do most of your leggy boobs.” She sulked at him again, big doe eyes that sucker punched him more, and a little petted mouth that was killing him right now. He couldn’t believe he was contemplating walking back to his room and stopping this.

“They’re not the same. Not even close, bella. They don’t have the other side to her … That’s what I mean by “I like you both”. One can’t exist without the other. I wouldn’t like there to be only one and not the other.” He shrugged being almost completely open about his feelings for her.

“So, you like my split personality? … A lover of the cray cray.” She grinned playfully motioning in circles at her temples and crossing her eyes. He smiled, that overwhelming affection for her cuteness hitting him hard and making his mind up for him. He wouldn’t abuse her trust when she was drunk. He loved her and that meant no breaking boundaries when she was vulnerable.

Fuck you, Carrero, wimp!

He moved another hair from her face taking a last longing look with the intention of saying goodnight. Every part of his body was yelling at him, but he didn’t care. He wanted her to be able to face him in the morning and deep down he knew this was not the way it should be between them.

“It’s not split though, there’re glimpses of both versions all the time, just one chooses to dominate … I see drunk Emma sometimes in PA Emma. When she occasionally relaxes too.” He had lost all his merriness, sobering up hard and lingering when he should have been walking out.

“Maybe she doesn’t know how to relax all the time,” she confessed with a conspiratorial wink. Emma couldn’t look anything but gorgeous to him.

“I think she’s scared,” he answered thoughtfully, not sure if it was her he was talking about anymore, or him.

Was he too scared to try to move things on? Was her being drunk an excuse?

“Why?” She watched him carefully, that sweet inquisitive expression on that flawless face. He stood up, his hands moving to cross across his chest and moved away from her. Putting distance between them deliberately.

“Because letting her guard down means she lets go a bit of control and she likes to hold it all together. Letting go makes her vulnerable, leaves her exposed, and that’s worse than death for her.” His voice was steady and low, betraying none of his emotion; it’s what he knew about her, but she didn’t know it was about him too. Moving in on Emma was letting his guard down fully, removing the final barrier which had kept him safe from complete devastation. Wimping out was about protecting him as much as her. Protecting his heart from being broken again.

“If I’m vulnerable, people can hurt me … Men can hurt me,” she whispered into the darkness of the room, sounding suddenly fearful, bringing him out of his own head and that fierce protective instinct for her coming out to play. Watching her he bent so his forehead met hers and pressed their noses together, an awkward position for him but as natural as breathing. He wanted to comfort her and make her feel safe. He would always keep her safe. It took precedence over everything.

“I’d never let anyone hurt you, Emma.” He breathed against her. His hands coming down to hold his weight on the mattress at either side of her thighs so he could stay leaning over her. Bringing them close enough to breathe the same air and smell her gentle tropical skin.

“What if you couldn’t stop them?” She suddenly sounded so young and vulnerable and he wanted to squeeze her badly. He would die to protect her, always.

“I’d always stop them.” He promised with conviction in his voice because he truly meant it. Emma sank toward him impulsively, looking like a lost child, reaching up so she could wrap her arms around his neck and brought their foreheads to touch. He wanted to close his eyes at the way she initiated this cuddle and imprint it to memory, she didn’t often initiate touch at all.

“You won’t always be around,” she said quietly.

“I’m always around if you haven’t noticed,” he said softly, bringing attention to the fact that since he had met her he had engineered almost a constant presence on purpose. Even before he knew what she was becoming to him, he had wanted her around him all the time.

He felt her lift her head and tug him a little closer, so their eyes could lock. The most intimate thing Emma had ever done, and he had to steel himself back in to stop the impulse to kiss her again. She looked so trusting which only calmed his fire.

“I guess,” she whispered at him.

“Let go, Emma … trust me to look after you … if not long-term, then for these two weeks at least. Trust me to protect you.” He was almost begging her. He wouldn’t do this drunk but if she was this way tomorrow, then maybe he would. Sober, he would kiss her if she let him.

“I’ll try,” she whispered, not loosening her hold on him at all.

“Good girl.” His arms came around her, pulling her up to him slightly for a gentle embrace to say goodnight and leave before he did anything stupid, lifting her from the bed for a full body embrace.

“Don’t say that to me.” She paused mid hold, causing him to halt. Her voice childish.

“Why?” He was suddenly confused at what he had said.

Good girl? What was wrong with that?

“Just don’t …” she said a little more firmly, he smiled in acknowledgment and slowly pulled her the rest of the way to cuddle her. Dismissing it for a conversation when she was more lucid. Emma snuggled into him a little too readily, making his body react in the worst kind of way for this given situation; he had to release his hold or impale her. The sudden release of her body made her stumble awkwardly and Jake cursed himself internally, reaching to catch her and losing his own footing as his toes hit the bed leg painfully.

Fuck. Graceful this was not.

He leaned forward too far to try to keep hold of her and somehow completely lost his balance, too drunk for these kinds of maneuvers and even though she weighed practically nothing he went down on top of her, nose to nose and laughing like fools at the awkwardness of their ungraceful collapse. His face was so close to hers and his body fully connected in such an intimate pose that for just a second, he couldn’t react, his mind a whirling mess of ‘kiss her … don’t kiss her’. He just stared instead like a dumb asshole and couldn’t foresee Emma lunging at him full force in a flash.

Her mouth connected with his so suddenly that she almost winded him and took a millisecond to realize that she was kissing him, Emma was kissing him!

Fuuuuuckkk.

His heart somersaulted to his abdomen and sent all manner of craziness inside of him. His mouth and hers entwined in seconds, moving into the one thing he had wanted for so long and being hit with an overwhelming onslaught of emotions and sensations all at once. Euphoric tingles and extreme hunger, losing himself in her taste.

Goddamn, she tasted like peaches and cream and her soft lips and softer tongue were made for devouring.

She kissed like an angel, a little unsure at first, obviously inexperienced which only made him want her more. He knew he should stop it, but he couldn’t. The second her lips had met his he was lost to her and no amount of willpower would drag them apart right now. He was adjusting his body to lean all over her without crushing her and losing himself into the kiss in ways he had never experienced.

This was love, he couldn’t deny it anymore. The way she felt, what kissing her made him feel. He was lost with no hope of a comeback after this.

His hands moved to her hair and around her throat impulsively, wanting to hold her to him and claim her. Softly holding her still so he could lead the kiss, showing her how to mold to him as she found her way. Her movements became more confident and meeting him flawlessly, he loved the fact that it was obvious she hadn’t done a whole lot of kissing this way, her inexperience was noticeable, but she was adjusting herself instinctively to him. She was his perfect pure angel.

God, she was made to kiss him.

He could feel her heart rate increasing under him, her body moving to accommodate him more comfortably and her breathing getting shallower as she got more turned on. Jake knew without a doubt this was heading for sex and he knew he might not have the willpower to stop it, lust consuming him and love driving him.

He caught her hands in his and pressed them against the mattress beside her head, pulling away to catch his breath momentarily, trying to slow things down and gain control. Trying to rationalize this, but he couldn’t, the way she was looking at him just pulled him back down. He had no control over this, she had opened a flood gate, and he wanted her so badly he had no say anymore. His head was blanking his thoughts out and just lost to the sensations.

He dropped back to that inviting mouth and gave himself all in, no regrets, no holding back, just kissing her more passionately and harder. Both breathing hard and fast, Emma responded with fervor, arms wriggling to be free to go to him. Legs moving up around his waist and inching herself against his abdomen even though he was trying to keep distance down there. She was moving against his body suggestively in time to the kissing and making him groan wildly. He knew Emma was no virgin, she had mentioned boyfriends from her teens, but she clearly had never been a casual sex kind of person which made this all the more intoxicating for him. Her movements were not skilled and honed, there was an innocence and almost awkwardness, holding onto him as though asking him to guide her. He had been with enough women in his lifetime to know this was almost as close to her being a virgin as he could get, and he fell in love with her all the harder.

She wouldn’t go all in for just a drunken night surely?

He pulled away and kissed her again, this time sucking her bottom lip seductively and testing how far she may want to go. She writhed under him, reaching up to try to kiss him again, her body fully molded to his and despite his obvious arousal she wasn’t backing down but pressing herself to him. Jake’s head was cloudy with lust and he could no longer think straight, nothing except getting her body naked and being inside her.

She was clinging to him and trying to pull him further into her, moaning at his touch, moaning as his tongue moved back into her mouth slowly and she began scrambling her hands free to haul him down by the shoulders greedily as though pinned together was not close enough. There was no denying she wanted this as much as him and he was beyond stopping it, his hands moving to skim the side of her breast and reveling in how fucking sexy her body was to him. Holding his weight up so he could shift against her harder. Bringing his groin to her pelvis and parting her legs further so there was no denying where he was pushing this, she just opened up and let them connect. Her body heat, scorching hot in the apex of her thighs, fueling his desire.

He groaned against her mouth, her body too perfect for words, hand moving down to trace her thigh and head toward her heat ready to take this a step further without hesitation. That point of no return.

There was a massive bang in the hall behind them, he had left the door wide open and the sudden noise made him jerk around quickly, shielding her to protect her from whatever it was. There was lots of hysterical screaming as the door filled with a dark looming figure of a man and Jake pulled away from her reluctantly to turn and look. Confusion clearing his foggy brain.

“What the f—?” Jake was shocked yet angry that he had finally got to this point with the girl of his dreams and some asshole was wading in to ruin it. He was still on top of her, braced on his arms but their bodies still entangled achingly.

“Jake? Jake?” The voice at the door sounded hysterical. He recognized Richard’s voice instantly.

“What is it?” he snapped, raging that this was his fucking life right about now.

“It’s Daniel, he fell off the boat … We can’t find him.”