Chapter 190: Chapter 190

Ivan never left the lake.

His body trembled, his vision was blurred, but still he kept diving in. Again and again. His lungs burned every time he came up for air, but he didn’t care. His lips were blue, his skin pale from the cold spring water. Still, he went in.

Inside his heart one thought repeated over and over.

"I have to find it. I have to find it. I have to give it to her."

Maybe it was madness. Maybe it was desperation. Or maybe it was because that necklace was not just a necklace. It was the last piece of his love for Lydia. The last thing he wanted her to have from him. The only thing he still held on to.

Katherine stood on the shore, her hands trembling as she called out.

"Your highness! Please come out! You will hurt yourself!"

But he did not hear her. Or perhaps he refused to hear her. His body disappeared into the lake again. She covered her mouth with her hands, tears falling as she bit down on her lip.

She whispered to herself, "He has been in there too long. He will die. Even if he is a strong swimmer, he will die. Please, your highness... please."

Her legs shook. She wanted to dive in after him, to pull him out with her own hands, but she could not swim. And even if she could, she knew Ivan’s stubbornness. He would never accept her help. His heart was fixed on that necklace, on Lydia. Nothing else mattered to him.

So Katherine turned and ran, her skirts flying behind her, her breath sharp as she hurried back toward the palace.

She thought, "Maybe her highness Lydia can stop him. Maybe she can reach him."

At the same time, Tatiana sat in her chamber. She could not rest. She walked in circles across her carpet, her hands shaking, her nails bitten down.

She whispered again and again, "He cannot go there. He won’t. He won’t find anything there."

But her voice trembled, her chest rising and falling as her fear grew.

Suddenly, her door flew open. Yelena entered, her face pale.

"My lady," she said, "it is his highness. I think he is trying to kill himself. I saw him heading to the lake a while ago. He has been there for some time."

Tatiana’s eyes widened. She froze for only a second before her body moved on its own. She ran. Tears already filled her eyes. Yelena called after her, chasing her down the hallway, but Tatiana didn’t stop.

Her feet carried her so fast that she almost crashed into Boris. He caught her shoulders, steadying her.

"What is it? Are you alright, lady Tatiana?" he asked, alarmed.

Tatiana’s lips shook as she answered, "It is his highness. He is at the lake. He is trying to get himself killed."

Boris’s brows furrowed. He gripped her arms tighter. "What are you saying?"

Her voice broke as she whispered, "I told him... I told him I threw the necklace in the lake. I told him that. But I never thought... I never thought he would go there to search for it. I don’t know what to do. I think something terrible will happen to him."

Boris did not wait for more. The moment her words left her mouth, he let go and sprinted toward the lake. Tatiana stumbled but followed, her tears running freely now. Yelena ran after them too.

Meanwhile, Lydia was in her chamber. She had wanted to sleep, to close her eyes and forget for a while, but peace would not come. She paced the floor like a caged lion, her hands clenching, her heart twisting.

Tears spilled down her cheeks though she tried to hold them back.

"Stop caring, Lydia," she whispered to herself.

"Stop thinking about him. He deserves to suffer. He deserves to feel pain for what he did to you... for what he did to our baby. So why do you care? Why are you scared? It is none of your business."

Her chest heaved as sobs broke from her throat. She sank onto her bed, covering her ears with a pillow. But no matter how hard she pressed, she could still hear his voice.

Those words rang again and again in her head. She shook her head violently.

"No. It wasn’t true. It was a lie. All of it. He took advantage of me. He ruined everything. Don’t forget your pain. Don’t forget that day. You lost everything because of him."

She curled into a ball, clutching the pillow against her ears, tears soaking her cheeks. She repeated the words like a curse to herself.

"Hate him. Hate him. Don’t forgive him."

But still, her body trembled because another voice inside her asked softly, "Then why are you crying?"

Outside, Katherine was about to step back into the palace when she saw Boris and Tatiana rushing out. Her eyes widened. She turned around and followed them immediately, her heart pounding. She knew they were heading to the lake.

In the lake, Ivan’s body was failing. His arms felt like stones, his lungs screamed for air, his vision darkened. His strength left him. He sank deeper, the cold water closing over him.

But even as he drowned, his heart held only one thought. Lydia.

Her smile. Her laughter. The warmth of her hand in his. The look in her eyes the first time he had told her he loved her. Those memories played like flashes in his mind, the only light in the darkness.

"Lydia," he thought. "I need you more than I need air. I need your love more than I need life."

The water swallowed him. His body went limp.

At that moment, Boris arrived. His sharp eyes caught sight of Ivan sinking below the surface. Without a second of hesitation, Boris dived in. The cold hit him like knives, but he pushed through, his arms cutting through the water as he swam deeper and deeper.

Finally, he reached Ivan, whose body was going still. Boris grabbed him and pulled with all his strength, kicking hard, dragging him upward.

They broke the surface. Ivan gasped desperately, choking on air and water. Boris pulled him toward the shore, his strong arms refusing to let go until they reached land.

On the ground, Ivan coughed violently, his body shaking. His lips moved, broken words escaping him.

"I... I have to go back. I have to find it."

Boris gripped his shoulders, his voice stern but also worried.

"How do you expect to find a tiny necklace in this huge lake? It has been months. It is probably gone. Swallowed by a fish or carried away by the current. You will kill yourself for nothing."

Ivan shook his head weakly, his tears mixing with the lake water still dripping from his face.

"I know... but it was the only thing I had. The only thing left. I wanted to give it to her that night. The night of the Ember Light Ball. But I never did. I... I..."

His voice broke. He could not hold back anymore. He sobbed, his body collapsing in grief. His hands covered his face as he cried like a man who had lost everything.

Boris’s chest tightened. He tried to comfort him, saying softly, "You can make another. Thousands if you want. It is only a necklace."

But Ivan shook his head. His voice cracked, "No. It was not just a necklace. It was my hope. My last hope that she still had a place for me in her heart. Now it is gone. Lost forever in that lake. Just like us. Just like our love. It is gone. And it is all my fault. I ruined everything. And no matter what I do, I can never bring it back."

His sobs grew heavier. His body shook violently, his heart pouring out in front of Boris, Tatiana, Katherine, and Yelena who stood nearby, frozen in silence.

Not far away, Lydia stood hidden in the forest, her body half concealed by the trees. Her eyes were locked on Ivan.

She watched him cry as if his very soul was being ripped apart. The sound of his sobs echoed through the woods, piercing her chest.

Her hands shook, her lips parted, her own eyes glassy with tears.

At that moment, Anna approached quietly, her face gentle. She had seen Lydia standing there, and she came to her side. Her voice was soft, almost a whisper.

"I know it is not my place, your highness. But I think... I think he is still in love with you. I know I could not fix my own marriage. I lost it. But maybe... maybe you could fix yours. At least yours."

For a brief second, Lydia’s eyes softened. Her lips trembled. She whispered, almost too quietly to hear, "You are right."

Anna looked at her with hope, but it lasted only a moment. Lydia’s face turned cold again. Her voice cut sharp as a knife.

"But it is not your place. You are only my lady-in-waiting. Remember that."

Anna stammered, "I... I..."

Lydia’s voice shook, heavy with pain though she tried to hide it. Nᴇw ɴovel chaptᴇrs are published on novel⟡fire.net

"If he is hurting... then it is only the beginning. Because I suffer ten times worse. Because... Because of him, I lost everything. I even tried to take my own life... So tell me should I still forgive him."

Her voice cracked at the last words, but she did not let the tears fall. She turned sharply, walking back toward the palace, her gown brushing against the grass, leaving Anna frozen in place.

Anna’s lips trembled, her eyes filling with tears. She looked at Ivan still crying by the lake, then back at Lydia’s retreating figure. She did not know what to say. Her heart ached for them both, but her voice was lost in the silence of the forest.