Chapter 53: Chapter 53

He was coming so close. She could hear her own heartbeat in her ears. He was breathing on her face. She was nervous to no end. Surprisingly, it was not the kind of nervousness she would run from. She looked forward instead. Her thoughts even surprised her.

He stopped when his lips were almost two inches away from her lips. He looked at her with an expression she had not seen in his eyes before. It was so intense that she had to look away for a second to catch her breath.

He saw her looking away from his eyes. He was debating whether it was a good idea to show such advances at such a time when she was not stable and had gone through an ugly experience.

God knows how much he wanted to close the distance between them. Once again, he stopped himself though.

“Sleep.” He said softly putting some distance between them. He was afraid he would not be able to control himself if he was that close to her. Her hands, which were still clutching his shirt tightly, loosened as he distanced himself.

She looked at him to see him avoiding her suddenly. What happened? She did not know if she was glad that nothing happened between them or disappointed.

She should not feel this way, she thought. She had made it clear from day one that she did not want any complications in their contract. Why now she was having second thoughts?

She should avoid such tempting thoughts. She was never like that. But the way he took care of her made her feel things she should not have.

It was so hard for him to resist. She smelled like heaven and her small, soft figure was calling him to hold her tightly. Her silky hair was begging to be caressed. Her soft tempting lips were inviting him to kiss them with all that he had. It was indeed hard for him to resist.

He had never restrained himself so much when he desired something. He always got what he wanted when it came to pleasure. But it was not mere pleasure. He did not desire only that from her.

He wanted her. He wanted to know her. He wanted to spend time with her. He had never felt that way. Not even with Jade Parker whom he thought he loved.

He did not want to put any tags on his feelings for Olivia just yet. It had not been that long since they had met. To be honest, strong feelings and emotions did scare him a bit. He was not only respecting Olivia by being careful but also giving time to himself.

He did not get up from the bed though. He laid on his side looking at the ceiling. Olivia turned away and laid on her side keeping her back towards him.

She did feel a bit hurt. She had just shared her biggest secret with him. He could have shown a bit more empathy. She never craved sympathy or empathy from others, but this time, she did.

He had made it quite certain that he was caring to her, and she received the same message. But he suddenly acted cold with her telling her to sleep. His tone was soft but she still did not like the authoritative monotone in his voice. Guess, he still had things to change about himself.

‘Are you sure you are not disappointed that he did not kiss you and that is why you are finding excuses to be mad at him?’ Her inner voice asked a question she was too irritated to pay heed to. She did not want to answer that.

She thought about Michael who she had hit when he tried to sexually harass her. She knew from his intentions that he did not intend on stopping his disgusting actions and wanted to take it far. She acted on impulse and hit him on the head as she found the vase beside the couch which was miraculously put there for her to use as self-defense.

What she went through was not the only reason it still gave her anxiety to remember that day. She always had the thoughts of what would have happened if he actually died because of her? She would probably be behind the bars. Or even if she was not, she would not be able to live a normal life thinking she had taken someone’s life. It gave her extreme panic whenever she remembered that day.

Thankfully, he did not press charges. She did not know how he hid the fact that she was the one who had caused him harm, but nobody got to know about the incident. He was perhaps afraid as well for doing such disgusting things to her which was why he did not tell anyone about it.

It was ironic that the victim had to be the one scared. That was how the world worked and she could not do anything about it.

What she thanked her lucky stars for was that nothing happened besides him trying to touch her down there. He did molest her despite her efforts to push him away, but nothing beyond that happened.

Thomas did make her take the light out of the situation. She never thought she would laugh about it one day, but he made that happen.

Who was that guy? What kind of person was he? How could he make her feel calm and protected with one word or gentle touch?

She could not understand at all.

Thomas was lying and looking at the ceiling when he felt her turn around. Her posture did make him feel that she perhaps did not appreciate his sudden change of actions. But he did not think it was because she was disappointed that he did not kiss her. He knew she never had such kind of emotions regarding him.

She probably just wanted comfort and he had stopped giving her that. He did feel bad about it, but he could not do anything else. He had to put some distance as he was immensely afraid he would do something he should not.

She was a dangerous temptation. He knew he would get burned in return if he went near her. He would be engulfed in her flames with no way out. That was how intensely he was feeling about her at that moment as she laid there with his shirt and with her back towards him.

He shook his head and closed his eyes. She was breathing softly telling him that she was probably asleep. He tried to get some sleep, but he was failing miserably. After trying for almost half an hour and still failing, he got up and sat on the bed.

He did not know if it was due to the events of the day or the fact that she was lying right there beside him, and he could not do anything. It was torture for him as his hands itched to pull her closer and sleep with her soft form in his arms. Despite the distance he put between them, his senses were still overwhelmed by her fresh and sweet scent.

He saw her back move as she took stable breaths while his breathing was not stable at all.

He needed some fresh air. He could not keep lying there.

He got up and went to the kitchen to drink some water. He then went outside on the lawn to breathe in some fresh air. It was already four in the morning—still dark. They had returned from that disgusting party pretty late and none of them were stable enough to sleep after that. He had to make sure she was okay first.

And now, all he could think about was that they were sharing the same bed but still, he could not touch her. He was not a sex freak or something. It was not what he was desiring at that moment, but what he did desire was to hold her, touch her skin, and run his fingers through her hair. He wanted to assure her with his words and actions that he was there for her.

But all the doubts and uncertainties kept rushing to his head telling him he should not do that. She was not like someone who would appreciate him being cuddly or touchy with her. She was also someone who was so independent. He was even afraid of showing concern not to offend her.

God, he was being so weird. She had made him feel that way. She had made him think of his actions carefully when he did not do so before. He had no choice but to do that.

He sat on the bench for over an hour thinking about nothing and everything. It was still dark as he sat there. He heard some faint voice from inside. Thinking it was just his imagination, he ignored it.

Then he heard it audibly. His name was being called. He frowned.

Getting up from the bench, he looked at the door to see Olivia coming out of it looking scared.

Her expression became normal only after she spotted her beside the bench.

“Olivia?” He called confused as to what had happened. She was sleeping soundly before he left the room.

She was breathing hard and he could see that very well even under the moonlight and the light in the lawn which he had switched on as he came there. Her hair was disheveled as she came running to him. He just looked at her with a confused frown as she ran to him.

She hugged him tightly as she reached him.

His hands froze which he had raised to grab her. He thought she would come to stand beside him, and he wanted to comfort her because he could see she was scared. She was clutching him so tightly as if she was afraid he would run away.

“I thought—I thought you have left.” She said while breathing harshly.

He put his hands on her back getting why she was so scared. She probably had gotten up and found that he was not there.

“Why would I leave? I am here…right here with you.” He said caressing her back making her let out a long sigh of relief. His heart had picked up the pace once again. He was confused as to why it was reacting that way.

Maybe, it was because of the fact that he was needed there. She was scared that he had left, so it meant that she wanted him with her. It was the first time she had expressed that she did not want him gone.

Every other time, she looked like she did not like to be in the same room as him. It could be that he had imagined it, but that was how he felt. But now, she was hugging him and telling him to be with her.

Did he want any other reason not to do what his heart desired?

He pulled away a little to look at her face. She had her head down. She could not believe she had probably thrown herself at him. She was so scared that she did not have any control over her actions.

He gripped her chin gently and raised her face to look at her eyes. They were misted over making him think that she was holding back tears. She looked at him with those innocent, dark, round, and enchanting pair of eyes. She was so close and he had his hand around her. She felt so small and soft in his arms that he could not resist anymore.

And when she licked her lower lip, it was the last straw.

Without wasting another second, he pulled her even closer and put his lips over hers stilling her in the process.