Chapter 23: Chapter 23

One month. Four weeks. Thirty days. A total of seven hundred and twenty hours . . .

Without Leroy.

I clutch the moving box close to my chest, unable to take the first step inside. Dad purchased a brand new house, a small yet spacious two bedroom. Our previous one completely burned down to the ground but even if it didn't, I don't think I'd be able to step foot inside it again. Knowing the walls held the death of Leroy would haunt me forever.

I barely have any belongings. The box I'm holding contains a few items of clothing, a toothbrush, Alfie The Bear, a picture of Leroy and I and beauty bits. All of my previous possessions were destroyed in the fire.

I glance up at the building, tears welling up in my eyes. The front door is wide open, inviting me in but I just can't do it. I can't put one foot ahead of the other and walk inside. Leroy should be right beside me, giddy with excitement.

"Honey, are you okay?" Dad asks, appearing by my side. He places a hand on my shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze. I feel the lump lodged in my throat begin to expand.

"Y-yeah, I'm fine." I murmur, inhaling a deep breath. "Do you want to do it together?" Dad asks me quietly, able to see straight through my facade. I give him a small grateful smile and he takes hold of my spare hand, holding it tightly.

"I wish Leroy was here," I whisper, blinking back tears. Dad inhales sharply beside me, his posture visibly tensing.

"Me too honey, me too."

We don't speak again but Dad gently guides me inside the house, our hands clutching onto each other for support. Once I'm inside, the tight hold on my lungs loosen and I'm able to breathe again. I study the light grey walls and the staircase a few feet away.

"You can choose whatever room you want." Dad says quietly, taking a step back. I nod my head, warily taking another step forward. The thick carpet cushions my steps as I head for the stairs. I stand on the first one before turning back towards Dad. He's studying me with a concerned expression, his lines and wrinkles deepening due to the past month.

"Dad?"

"Yes honey?" He responds, his voice monotone. It's hard to find true emotion in him nowadays. He's lost the spark that once lit up his eyes.

"Thank you for being here." I say firmly, giving him a small smile. His face softens and I can see the tears pooling up in his eyes. I can't remember the last time I had my father around for so long. Despite it being under heart breaking circumstances, I couldn't have survived the past few weeks without him. He's the only parent I have left, the only parent I want.

I turn back around and head up the stairs slowly, the scent of fresh paint lingering in the air. I'm greeted by the first door, it's closed over firmly and my hand rests on the handle. I clutch onto the box under my free arm and pull the door open. It's a large bedroom, unfurnished and decorated with wooden flooring. I step inside and close the door over, studying the rest of the room. A large window on the opposite side allows light to stream inside and I walk over to it, leaning down to place my box on the floor. It looks silly on its own in the room but it's the only belongings I have.

The window is painted a crisp white to match the walls and I glance out of it, studying the view. The tops of several other buildings and the skyline stares back at me and even though it's simple, I like it. I turn back around, inspecting the white walls.

It's a blank canvas.

Fresh start.

A brand new house for Dad and I to turn into a home. I lean back against the wall, breathing deeply. A light knock on my door causes me to turn towards it. Dad is standing in the doorway, his hands stuffed inside his denim jeans.

"You like this one?"

I nod my head. "It's perfect."

"I didn't buy you any furniture because you know I don't make the best decisions when it comes to decorating." Dad chuckles quietly, his eyes remaining lifeless. I give him a small smile in response, wondering if the death of Leroy would always hang over our heads.

"I can pick some stuff out, I'd like a project to keep me occupied." I respond, glancing around the room once again. Dad nods and takes a step inside. He continues walking over to me and pulls out his bank card.

"Here, take this."

I shake my head. "No, I have my own money."

"Honey, you're eighteen. I'm sure you'd rather spend your money on things beside from furniture." Dad scolds me, suggestion lining his voice. I chuckle dryly, lightly pushing his hand away that's clutching his bank card.

"Trust me Dad, I can afford to pay for myself. Thank you though, it's kind of you."

He pauses for a moment before nodding and placing his card back inside his pocket.

"When did my little girl grow up into a beautiful woman?" He suddenly says, his voice full of emotion. I blink, his words taking me completely by surprise. I stand up straight on my feet, wrapping my arms around his neck. He remains stiff at first but soon hugs me back, his warm scent comforting me.

"I'll always be your little girl." I mumble into his shoulder. I feel him intake a sharp breath and his hand begins to rub circular motions on my back. It reminds me of the times I was poorly as a child. Dad would stay awake with me all night, rubbing circular motions on my back until I finally fell asleep. The memory causes me to smile genuinely.

"I love you honey." Dad murmurs, leaning back and pressing a light kiss to my forehead.

"I love you too Dad."

*****

"Knock knock."

My head shoots up and I sit up a little straighter, automatically fixing my hair. Tobias is stood in my doorway, leaning against it casually with his arms folded over his chest. He's wearing a plain white shirt with a denim jacket over the top. The fabric is ripped in several places and he's rolled the sleeves up to expose half of his arms. His dark hair matches the colour of his jeans perfectly and he shoots me a lopsided smirk, eyes twinkling in my direction.

"Sorry, did I disturb you?"

I glance around at the completely bare room, gesturing at it with my arm.

"What do you think?" I say playfully. I was deep in thought when he arrived, sitting cross legged on the floor facing the window. The sun was beginning to stream inside, warming up one section of my floor.

"You look extremely busy." Tobias hits back, his tone playful. I roll my eyes, gesturing for him to come inside.

"I like the room, it has potential." He says, walking towards me. His footsteps echo against the floor and he stops once he's beside me. I breathe in sharply due to his close proximity and when he bends down, I get a waft of his cologne. My stomach flips several times, butterflies fluttering away due to his presence. He lets out a low grunt as he attempts to sit cross legged on the floor.

"I will never understand how girls do this." He mumbles under his breath, finally giving up and leaning his legs forward.

"We're a special kind of species." I smile at him, leaning back against the wall and soaking in the sun. He lets out a low scoff, his lips twitching into an amused smirk.

"You're right about the species part. You're an entire different species altogether."

I let out a gasp, lightly slapping his arm.

"Shut up, you wouldn't be born if it wasn't for us females."

"Geez, you're not about to turn all feminist on me, are you? I don't think I'm mentally prepared." He jokes, licking his bottom lip. My eyes linger on them a little too long.

"This world needs more feminists." I comment, finally able to tear my eyes away from his very inviting lips. He scrunches his face up in disagreement, his jaw sharp and well defined.

"I really love this conversation we're having. . . "  he says dryly causing me to roll my eyes.

"But — " he continues, holding out his hand towards me. I gingerly place my hand in his, wondering what he's got planned. His warmth seeps through my arm, causing it to erupt in goosebumps.

"We have lots of shopping to do." He finally says, his brown eyes lighting up in my direction. I tilt my head at him in interest — "Shopping?"

He pulls me up gently to my feet, nodding his head.

"Oh yes, shopping."

"Shopping for what?" I question.

"You'll see." He says mysteriously, guiding me out of the room and down the stairs. I don't protest and allow him to drag me to his car, a silly grin plastered across his face. Eventually, it becomes infectious and I'm smiling back at him, grateful for the distraction and company.