Chapter 244: Chapter 244: Self-Taught
Cecilia, still pale from shock, slowly pushed herself upright. She took off her fogged-up glasses, wiped them on her coat sleeve, and put them back with an indignant look on her face.
"This really isn’t fair, Lady Fauna." She said in a voice that trembled between outrage and awe. "This isn’t fair at all! You’ve clearly raised him into this. You must have taught him everything you know about medicine since he was a child!"
"Don’t tell me you didn’t drill knowledge into him every day—lectures, rounds, practice sessions—everything a med-student could dream of. With a teacher like you constantly at his side, of course he’d turn into a prodigy!"
The three other doctors nodded; this explanation at least made sense to them.
But Fauna simply smiled and then shook her head.
"Nope~!"
All four doctors froze.
"N-No...? What do you mean no?!" Cecilia sputtered.
Fauna clasped her hands together as if recalling a fond memory.
"I never taught Mika anything about medicine when he was young."
Cecilia flinchedz, while the doctors’ eyes bulged.
Fauna continued cheerfully:
"The truth is when he was around six years old, I was doing rounds at the old hospital and Mika came along because he wanted to help—he was such a good boy back then!"
"Fauna, please don’t—" Mika groaned into his hand.
But she continued.
"And while I was diagnosing patients one by one...suddenly, out of nowhere little Mika just snatched the clipboard out of my hands and started diagnosing on his own."
"He did what!?" Cecilia shreiked.
"Oh yes." Fauna nodded proudly. "He read it for a few seconds, looked at the patient, and then began giving diagnoses. Perfect ones."
The nurses behind the doctors gasped.
"Everyone was shocked!" Fauna laughed. "Even me! And when I asked him how he knew...he just said he read some books I left lying around in my room and figured it out."
The room went silent.
Dead silent.
Cecilia’s soul visibly attempted to leave her body.
"You mean..." She whispered hoarsely. "You didn’t teach him a single thing?"
"Not formally." Fauna shook her head again. "I did guide him a little after that on practical topics, but Mika mostly studied on his own. He’s always been self-taught."
Cecilia stared at Mika like she was looking at a supernatural phenomenon.
Self-taught.
Self-taught?!
SELF-TAUGHT?!
Her hand trembled as she pointed at him.
"You...You learned all that ON YOUR OWN? Without lectures? Without professors? Without training? Without a mentor?!"
Mika shrugged awkwardly. "...Books exist."
One doctor collapsed onto a chair.
Another whispered. "I wasted my twenties..."
Another muttered. "I’m going home..."
But Fauna wasn’t done.
Oh no. She puffed up with pure, overflowing pride.
"And that’s not all!" She added brightly.
Mika’s eyes widened in dread. "Fauna—"
"Mika also helped publish many medical papers under my name—"
"FAUNA—"
"And half of the medicines I invented? Actually they were invented by—"
Mika lunged forward and slapped a hand over her mouth.
Fauna squeaked. The doctors stared.
But Cecilia’s eyes glowed with bloodlust as it seemed like Fauna was trying to tell something that was actually absurd to think of.
"Invented by who...?" Cecilia demanded dangerously, stepping forward. "Who exactly created those medicines? WHO?"
Mika, smiling stiffly, answered smoothly.
"Of course by Fauna. Who else could create them. What she meant is that I...helped. A bit. Assisted here and there."
Cecilia blinked, then sighed as what he said made much more sense then what she was thinking. She then looked at him with envy and said with visible jealousy and frustration
"To think that you helped Lady Fauna in those moments. Do you have any idea how lucky you are? Each of Lady Fauna’s medicines has saved hundreds of millions of lives—including my own mother’s! To work beside her like that..."
She trailed off, shaking her head.
"That’s not luck—that’s a blessing!"
Fauna tried to smile behind Mika’s hand, eyes gleaming with pride but also an innocent eagerness to blurt out the truth again.
But Mika glanced down at her sharply, his expression saying don’t even think about it.
Fauna blinked twice, then sheepishly nodded, her lips still pressed against his palm in silent agreement.
Only then did he finally release her.
Cecilia, meanwhile, was still staring at him with a look somewhere between admiration and horror.
"Self-taught...assistant to Lady Fauna...unmatched knowledge..." She muttered, looking at the ceiling as she spoke to herself. "He’s not a man. He’s a walking medical encyclopedia. No—he’s a monster disguised as a pretty boy."
"I’ll take that as a compliment." Mika sighed, tilting his head.
"You see, Cecilia?" Fauna only laughed softly beside him, eyes shining with that same boundless affection. "That’s why I told you not to underestimate him."
While Fauna was brimming with pride like she was showing off her favourite toy for show and tell and Cecilia was left contemplating her life, Mika himself thought he was done.
’That should be enough.’ Je thought. ’I’ve proven my worth, satisfied their curiosity, and survived the interrogation. Time to end this circus.’
He looked directly at Cecilia, and spoke with calm finality.
"Well, now that you’ve heard everything and seen for yourself that I’m not some rumor or exaggeration like you first believed—I think my work here is done." He smiled faintly. "It’s been a pleasure meeting you all, but I came here for something else. Me and Fauna are going to—"
"Hold it right there!" Cecilia’s voice rang out before he could finish.
Mika stopped mid-sentence, turning slowly toward her.
"...What now?"
Cecilia crossed her arms, a sly smile forming on her face.
"Who said you could escape from me so quickly?"
He blinked. "Excuse me?"
"Just now." She began confidently. "Lady Fauna praised your diagnostic ability—how you were skilled even at the age of six. But just because you were a prodigy back then doesn’t mean your talent has kept up now."
She flicked her wrist with flair, eyes glinting.
"And, similar to you, I’m quite well-versed in diagnosing patients. So naturally, I want to see which of us is truly better."
Mika frowned. "You don’t mean—"
"Oh, I absolutely do." She said, grinning. "I propose a challenge."
He groaned. "Of course you do."
Cecilia continued, utterly ignoring his tone.
"We’ll go to the general ward, patient by patient, and see who can perfectly diagnose them faster and more accurately. Lady Fauna can act as a mediator and verify the results. It’ll be the perfect opportunity to test our skills—and sharpen our medical instincts!"
Behind her, the three exhausted doctors exchanged horrified looks.
She’s doing it again.
Mika on the other hand stared at her, speechless for a moment, then rubbed his forehead with a long sigh.
"I don’t even want to show off my skills." He said flatly. "I just came here for my tests. I’m not a doctor, and I’m not even legally allowed to diagnose patients."
Before he could continue, Fauna cheerfully waved her hand.
"That’s alright, Mika! I’ll handle the legal side of it. As long as I say it’s fine, everyone will believe it’s fine."
Mika blinked, deadpan. "Fauna, that’s called corruption."
"Sometimes you have to be a little corrupt to do a lot of good." She giggled, clasping her hands together.
He stared at her. "That’s...not how law works."
"So what’s it going to be, Mika Archiviste?" Cecilia leaned forward, smirking. "Are you running away from a fair challenge?"
He sighed again, long and heavy before saying,
"Normally, I’d just reject you and move on with my life. But honestly..." He looked her straight in the eye. "You seem like a very annoying person."
"W-What—" Cecilia froze, caught off guard.
He raised a hand.
"Oh, sorry. I mean, not annoying—just...passionate. Extremely passionate. The kind of passionate where, if I refuse, you’ll probably stalk me until I give in."
"How did you know that?" Her eyes widened.
"Just a hunch." He arched an eyebrow.
"Well, you’re not wrong!" Cecilia crossed her arms proudly. "If you hadn’t accepted, I was planning to get your number and call you every single day until you did. And if that didn’t work..."
She smirked.
"I’d just go straight to your house and drag you back myself."
Mika sighed in defeat. "...Exactly. That’s exactly why I’m saying yes. Let’s get this over with."
Fauna giggled, clapping her hands delightedly.
"Oh my, Cecilia, you did it! You even managed to make the stubborn Mika change his mind~"
Cecilia puffed her chest proudly, pointing at herself.
"Of course I did. I’m more stubborn then he is. It’s only natural that I’d get my way in the end."
Mika sighed, already regretting agreeing to the challenge, and reached for Fauna’s waist.
"Alright, let’s go before Cecilia changes her mind and adds another round of interrogation."
Before she could react, he effortlessly lifted her off his lap, intending to stand up and carry her over to the general ward.
But halfway through, Fauna suddenly gasped, her eyes widening as realization struck her.
"Mika! What are you doing?!" She squeaked, clutching the back of the chair.
And before he could even answer, she pulled herself right back down—landing firmly on his lap again with a soft thump, pressing herself close and pouting dramatically.
"W-What’s this about?" She asked in an almost scolding tone, looking back at him. "Why are you suddenly trying to stand up and take my favorite seat away from me?"
He blinked, trying not to laugh.
"Fauna, I have to get up if we’re going to walk to the general ward. It’s not like I can just float there while you’re sitting on me."
She blinked once. Then twice. Then, slowly, a mischievous smile bloomed on her face.
"Actually..." She said sweetly. "We can float. Or...roll!"
Mika immediately groaned. "Oh no. No, no, no—"
But Fauna just turned to the other doctors, bright-eyed.
"Could someone please bring me a wheelchair?"
One of the three immediately scurried off, clearly used to Fauna’s whims. Within seconds, they returned, pushing a hospital wheelchair right next to the two of them.
Fauna clapped her hands together in delight and pointed.
"See? Now we can roll to the general ward together! I can still sit on your lap, and you can wheel us over. Perfect solution, don’t you think?"
Mika stared at her. He wanted to argue. He wanted to refuse.
But then he remembered who he was dealing with—and just sighed in surrender.
"You really are such a child sometimes, you know that right?" He murmured, standing up and gently lifting her in his arms again.
Without another word, he sat himself down on the wheelchair, adjusted his position, and carefully placed Fauna back on his lap, securing an arm around her waist to steady her.
Fauna beamed instantly.
"Oh, Mika, you really are such a good boy!" She turned and hugged him tightly, giggling against his chest. "Before, you’d have sulked for hours and insisted that you’d never do something so silly.
"...but now here you are, just going along with it so easily! I’m so happy!"
Mika chuckled softly, returning the hug with one arm.
"I wouldn’t say I’ve changed that much." He said dryly. "I’ve just learned it’s easier to let you win."
"So you admit that I’ve won!" Fauna gasped playfully.
"Don’t push it." Mika replied, smiling despite himself.
Meanwhile, the three doctors stood in stunned silence, watching them.
They couldn’t help but feel a mix of awe and admiration at the sight—the battle maiden who saved the world twice nestled comfortably in the lap of the young man she clearly adored, their closeness radiating warmth that seemed to fill the entire room.
Cecilia, who had been silent until then, finally spoke, her tone softer this time.
"You really do love him a lot, don’t you, Lady Fauna?"
"Of course!" She said with the biggest smile. "I love him most in the world!"
Her words made the entire room go still. Even Mika blinked, momentarily caught off guard.
But Fauna only smiled wider, her hands still clasped over his as she added with a playful tone,
"Now, my darling assistant, onward! Let’s roll to victory and show Cecilia what real diagnosis looks like!"