Chapter 64: Chapter 64
“Who’s that?” I asked as I watched the woman smiled at me before she walked away. There were strange glints in her eyes, telling me she knew me.
“Ignore her. Just some crazy woman who roams around the street.”
“But she stares at me as if she knows me? Is she also one of those people I couldn’t remember?”
Kim gathered me in his arms. I was already shaking. What else were those terrible things that I did in the past?
“Stop thinking about it. Give yourself more time. You will restore your memories, eventually. Don’t stress yourself. And I hope you will also remember my place in your heart before.”
I fell silent for a while. A sense of guilt also welled up inside me. I may not remember him, but the thrill I felt every time I saw him, my fondness and admiration for him, and that I made him my sexual fantasy, spoke of the truth that he had occupied a space in my heart.
“But why do I still remember everything that happened before I went to Japan?” I said, disentangling from his embrace so that I could see his face.
“It’s called partial amnesia. Our human brain refuses to remember everything that is extremely painful to us. That’s why those people who underwent severe vehicular accident could not remember the incident well.”
“Then what happened to me? Can an attempted rape induce amnesia?”
Kim heaved out a deep sigh, and his gaze sharpened.
“Are you suspecting that aside from that incident you saw, there was more to it?”
Kim’s face had turned red already. “I hope not. I am still investigating the part where you disappeared. Who took you, what happened during that time, and how did you go home?”
I sat up and snapped a finger when I remembered what Kath said about Kim’s father’s second wife.
“What about the suspicion about Maezy?” I shook my head. I really didn’t think I knew Maezy before.
My heart leaped when I realized something. And I related it to what Kim had said about our brain refusing something that is extremely hurting us. Could the reason I couldn’t remember Maezy was because she was one of those people that my brain refused to remember?
“She was the one who invited you to Josh’s club. And Maezy admitted she gave in to Josh’s request to dance in front of him. But she blames it on both of your drunkenness. And she said she couldn’t remember anything after that. I was even the one who took her home.”
I stiffened. Josh told me something else that he bought me from someone for that night. Who sold me then?
“Stop thinking about that.” Kim pulled me into his arms again. “There’s no need to rush everything. Remember, you have a child.”
“But I can’t take it out of my mind –“
“I’ll help you.” Kim cut me off by lifting my chain and claimed my mouth into another slow but passionate kiss. He made it so slow that my body stiffened, begging for deeper exploration.
Kim reached out to my side and our seats reclined again. His moves this time become harder, expressing his growing desire. It was easy for him to lift the hem of my dress because I was always fond of one-piece dresses in which hems always fell above my knees. In no time, my undies dropped off to the edge of the seat as Kim tossed it there.
This was where Kim and Zed differed. Kim always made me want for more, and our fights never ended until I became breathless and shaking in utmost pleasure and fulfillment.
Kim hugged me tightly after pulling out of me. “How long can I watch you with another man? How long can I take the pain in thinking that every night you also moan like you just did?”
“Kim, what are you talking about?” I said, sitting abruptly from the reclined seats. “Of course, he’s my husband.” I felt quite awkward that I bit my lips hard.
“But I am your husband, Jakara!”
I wanted to tell him I was not enjoying bed with Zed like I always did with him. But I respected Zed, and I had no right to shame him. More than anything else, I had nothing to ask for more with Zed. The way how he treated and cared for me can conceal that single flaw.
“We better stop seeing each other. Because you couldn’t forget me if I am just within your reach.”
“No way,” he said, pulling me tighter. “Okay, I’ll give you more time to weigh things out.”
There’s nothing to weigh out, I thought. We couldn’t just throw Zed and Maezy out of the picture. It would always involve emotion, trauma, and anxiety. And I couldn’t hurt Zed. It would have been better if things stayed as it was before Kim found me again.
After I put on my undies again, and Kim with his buttons, my phone rang. Kim glanced at my phone, and we both saw together Zed’s name blinking on the screen.
“Zed,” I said, looking at Kim.
“Dear, a friend invites me for lunch. I would pass by Kim Yuan’s; can I pick you up?”
M heartbeats immediately drummed against my chest. He may not catch me doing this fishy thing, but that Kim and I were spending time with each other washed me all over with guilt. I didn’t want him to get near me; I couldn’t imagine him smelling the hint of sex in my body.
“I’m also having a lunch meeting right with a client right now.” I glanced at Kim, who was watching me with an unreadable expression.
“Okay, dear.” I squinted upon hearing his voice - there was a sulking tone.
“Are you still at the house?” I asked.
His reply put my heartbeats to a halt. “I’m in front of your office building. I’m supposed to see you at the office, but someone named Vincent here told me you’re out with Mr. Mori.”