Chapter 56: Chapter 56
Nancy kept looking at him from under her eye lashes as she ate and drank her tea. She had had a dislike for coffee since she became pregnant.
'Nancy, I will not say that I am sorry for last night because I am not and do t tell me you were offering me comfort. We both know that isn't true.
It may have been true the previous time but not now. We have to talk about this thing between us' he started.
'Jason, there is nothing between us. It must have been a moment of weakness but that was all there was to it' she said quickly.
'Is it really? Can you sincerely say that you felt nothing when I held you in my arms in the pool last night?'
'Like I say, it was just a moment of weakness. Everybody has it but one must not take advantage of it. I was vulnerable last night. It was just my vulnerability acting. Nothing else. So, let's not make a mountain out of a mole hill', she said smiling to soften her harsh words.
'Then can you explain to me, your words about not wanting to be a play thing for a billionaire like me?'
'It was said at the heat of the moment but that is very true. I would not want to be the play thing to any man. I have had enough of that from my previous encounter to last me a lifetime', she said her voice trembling.
Jason heard the hurt in her voice and wanted to throw something at the man who had done this to her.
'Tell me about it', he requested.
'We had to get going to work, else we shall be late', she said.
'I'm sure we can spare a few minutes',
'Well, I can't ecause I am still an employee and not the owner and a few minutes would not cover it. It is a long story'.
'Do you promise then, to tell me when we get back home? ' he asked not wanting to let her off the hook easily.
When she hesitated, he said, 'But that is what friends are for. I am your boss but I confided in you as your friend when you asked me to. Well, it is your turn. A problem shared is solved or half solved already'
Nancy considered this. She did not know if she was ready to share this with a to e. She had not even shared it with Anna at the office and now sharing it with a man, and her boss too? Would he not think less of her when he heard the story of her gullibility? And that was what she did not want.
Why his opinion of her should matter, she did not know and did not want to delve into the reason at the moment but she found that it did matter, very much.
'I shall make no such promise about tonight but I promise to tell you when I am ready'. she said eventually.
Jason wanted to pursue the issue but decided against it. She was right. She would confide in him when she was ready and he knew that he would be waiting.
'About us?"
'There is no us, Jason. There could never be us.I am carrying another man's child and you have your lady friends and your ex wife is now in the picture as well. Let us forget that last night ever happened!' she said and it pained her to say those words be ause it had meant so much to her. Much more than she was willing to admit even to herself.
'I am promising you that you are not going to be a toy to me', he said seriously, 'and I do not mind your pregnancy'.
'Of course you will not mind until you get what you want out of me. Then you will remember that I am a used object and not fit for your attentions.But I am much wiser now.I will not be made a fool of by anyone anymore', she thought to herself bitterly.
But said aloud, 'You don't mind it now but what about later? And what kind of relationship would we have?' When he did not say anything, she felt sad knowing that she had been right all along but not wanting him to see how his silence had hurt her.Instead,she continued as though she had not waited for or expected any answer to her question,'Tongues will wag and I cannot compromise myself again. We are worlds apart. We are two parallel lines that cannot meet. Let's not go into a relationship that would hurt either of us again. You may have the heart to endure that but I do not think that I do. We are mature adults,we can control our emotions. Then let's do it.Control our emotions, that is! I shall get my hand bag so that we can get going.We are late as it is', she stood up hastily. She could feel the tears coming on. And did not want to break down in front of him. Why did she not meet him before her wretched boyfriend. Now, she had no faith in any man. She wanted desperately to be with him and it really surprised her to find that out but she would not allow herself to make that mistake again.
After the birth of her child, she would get I to a relationship with any ordinary man who would appreciate her and not thing that she was an object he could purchase with his money.
Jason felt there was no need arguing about it since she felt this way and he had no answer when she had asked what kind of relationship he wanted to have with her.
He had not thought that far. And he was not sure he wanted permanence just yet but he was ready to make sure that she and her child did not lack for anything.
But he had a feeling that that might not be what she wanted and he could not give her that which she wanted from him. Not yet anyway.
The drive to the office was a silent one and when they got there,she didn't wit for him to open her door for her but got out by herself and hurried into the building to start the day's work. Afterall that was what she was there for and not for encouraging impossible dreams like being the wife of the Lord of the manor.
She laughed bitterly at herself at the thought. How had she allowed herself to have fallen in love with Jason Campbell? Because she could not deny it. It had happened gradually that she had not known it was happening. She was a bigger fool than she gave herself credit for.