Chapter 45: Chapter 45

A dream dragged me very viciously into my consciousness. I don’t usually dream, maybe my mind was too full when I came back from Germany a few hours ago. I saw Sean being beaten in the dream, my heart sank thinking about it, I blinked my eyes and immediately chased the damn dream away, ever since the confession of his sad childhood memories in Venice, I’ve been wanting to know more about what he’s been through. Sean just entered the room and approached me with his million star charm smile, he kissed the top of my head inhaling the scent of my hair and sat on the edge of the bed.

“Merlin is waiting for us at his practice,” he reminded me and I was confused for a moment remembering the name, then I realized it, met his psychiatrist. I nodded and got out of bed leaving him.

“You are okay?”

Oh, Hell!! I hate him who knows my situation well, I’m still bothered by that dream. I lied by nodding my head, I looked for an alibi to convince him.

“I’m just still a little tired,” I reasoned as I grabbed my bathrobe and went into the bathroom. Sean can change like Caroline who has good intuition, I roll my eyes in disgust, My Inner Goddess twists her mouth with a sullen expression, yes, they both match, the thought makes me sick, what are you thinking Ariana?? That’s not possible. My Inner Goddess looked at me speculating, while my senses gave her a disapproving and angry look. Damn with that dream, my mind is so messed up because of it. I immediately splashed my body with cold water when my body wasn’t wearing anything, I tried to distract myself by thinking about some questions for Merlin’s doctor, but I seemed to be at a stalemate, I finally gave up and decided not to think about anything while taking a shower.

I wore a navy blue vertical stripes shirt with elbow sleeves as my top, and a black pencil skirt as a bottom, I wanted to give a polite impression the first time we met. I cut my hair in a ponytail, trimmed my bangs and put on a simple make-up, I put our wedding ring on my right ring finger with an admiring smile. Sean’s arms wrapped around me, I lifted my face and looked at him through the mirror his smile was a high-tension seductive smile.

“You look stunning honey, are you trying to seduce my psychiatrist?” he asked, he kissed my cheek his just about to grow sideburns tickled my face, I blushed with a blush. He rubbed his nose against my cheek gently.

“I just wanted to look decent,” I said a little breathless, how could he create such an intimate and passionate closeness??

“Your skirt looks short.” His voice is low and sensual, I think he will start with his bossy attitude.

“It’s just a skirt,” I moaned, I felt her smile in my ear, I got goosebumps from this intimate pleasure.

“I know, but I can’t give anyone a view of your panties but me.” Sean bit my earlobe, I held back a sigh, he coaxed me I knew it, and I chose to give up before he made me climax without entering me. Sean left me after I agreed to change my skirt, finally, I decided to wear a knee-length umbrella model skirt, after that I rushed to meet Sean who was waiting for me in the living room. He smiled contentedly when he saw me My Inner Goddess rolled her eyes, we don’t need a stylist like him.

“This is better,” he satisfied, and we went to see Doctor Merlin with Sam. We were lost in our own thoughts, I turned to look at Sean who was currently staring out the window, what was he thinking?? Is my request not too much?? Am I going too far??

We also arrived at a house with a conducive environment, a home as well as a place of practice, right on target. Sean took my hand and followed him to a building on the right side of the house that had double polished mahogany doors. Doctor Merlin wore glasses, he was tall with a friendly smile, maybe he was older than me and Sean. I shook his hand when Sean introduced us, he then invited us in and sat on a long light green sofa, this room has a light green nuance, very suitable for a psychiatric consultation place.

“Congratulations on your wedding, sorry I couldn’t come.” Doctor Merlin sincerely said it, he and Sean made small talk a little.

“So what do you want to ask, Ariana?”

“Just Ana,” I corrected, he nodded, I swallowed my saliva nervously I glanced at Sean who was looking at me, waiting. I can’t do this with him beside me.

“Do you mind if Sean waits outside?”

My Inner Goddess looked at me with her protesting gaze, just as Sean was doing right now, while my senses waited quietly.

“No,” I answered without looking at Sean, I know he wants to stay, but I want this consultation just me and Doctor Merlin. Sean finally walked out, after he closed the door I breathed a sigh of relief.

“How deeply traumatized was he?” I began, my Inner Goddess squirming restlessly on her red sofa, Doctor Merlin let out a long breath.

“Deep enough to make him always feel unworthy of love.”

I gasped, this proved his habit of apologizing and feeling guilty.

“Will he be able to get out of his current state?”

Doctor Merlin looked at me seriously.

“Depending on who he hangs out with, he needs the full support of those closest to him, especially those of you who have childhood memories with him.”

Can I??

“Can I be what he needs to be?”

My common sense frowned, why did this consultation turn into me?? Doctor Merlin smiled.

“So far, you’ve managed to apply one of the healing techniques I suggested to her.”

A glimmer of hope appeared like a small flame inside of me.

“What kind of treatment technique?”

“A distraction, he needs something to distract him from his childhood memories, and you seem to have done it.”