Chapter 8: Chapter 8

: Pity Party

→Narrator: Asa

After a quick text to Jemi and Kosi, telling them I was leaving, and another to Lola, who wanted to know how I was doing, I met Amir outside who was leaning all cool and dignified against Dave's Land Rover.

"This is technically stealing." I laughed, buckling my seatbelt.

"Oh, it's a normal thing for us, taking each other's ride. Dave crashed my Ferrari once. Made it out alive and unscathed but my baby didn't."

My hands flew to my mouth as I stared at him in horror. "Jeezus, Amir."

He waved it off nonchalantly. "T'sokay. It was an old model anyway. Daddy dearest replaced it right away."

The way he sneered as he talked about his father made me remember something.

"You don't like your dad?"

His reply was a shrug, a scowl on his beautiful face. "My dad doesn't even realize I exist. Makes the whole business of hating him kinda pathetic. I prefer to think of it as casual disinterest."

I hesitantly touched his shoulder, squeezing, trying to communicate my sympathy with him. "I'm sorry, Amir."

He turned to me, his lips, curving into a smile as one of his hands moved to clasp my hand on his shoulders. He squeezed back. "Thanks, Asa."

The ride to his apartment was short and nice as we switched the music from Burna Boy to Popcaan, another of his favourite.

"I actually did my homework on Billie." He perked up.

"Yeah?"

"She's cool. I see what you like about her. Won't make her a personal favourite though, but she's cool."

We swapped favourite songs and albums of hers as he drove, even quoting some of her lyrics to my amazement.

He had gone all out.

When we pulled up at his place, he took my hand, guiding me across the dark passage, all the way to the front door

"You're short sighted?" He asked, gently.

"A little. I can handle it most times but it gets worse in the dark when I'm watching a screen. Laptops are the worst."

He laughed softly as we walked into his apartment. I made myself comfortable at the kitchen barstool while he dug out a big bowl full of cookies from the fridge.

"I just started these out recently," he said, an almost shy smile on his lips as he slid the plate in front of me. "Don't judge too harshly."

I took one of the chocolate chipped goodness, gooey from being heated up in the microwave, and took a bite. Chocolate sweetness bursting in my mouth, melting on my tongue, warm and soft and sweet, and I welcomed the taste willingly, almost warming me up on the inside on this cold harmattan night.

"So?" Amir asked, curiously looking at me, like a child, anxious to please his mum. "Is it good?"

"Oh my God, Amir, it's the best!" I squealed, stuffing my face with more gooey chocolate goodness, licking the crumbs off my fingers.

"Careful, stranger. We have to leave some for the whole rooftop experience, remember?

I frowned as he took the plate from me, brought it back under my nose and snatched it away again when I reached out to it.

"No more." He wagged a finger in my face and I laughed.

Part of me was surprised by how playful Amir was acting. He was always so stoic and casually disinterested in things that I used to think he didn't understand the concept of happiness or having fun.

And after that night I watched him sing, when we realized how much we had in common, I still saw him as this serious, mysterious person.

Tonight, it was like he had shed off his armour and allowed me to see pieces of him he didn't allow everyone to see on a daily. He actually looked like a teenager today, rather than an imperial royal in all his cold regal glory.

He was still calm and cool, but there was a playfulness to his features, a bounce to his steps as he made his way into the cellar where he kept his assortment of wine- his one vice, he told me- that made me realize he was uncharacteristically happy...

Which made me wonder...

"Are you high?... Like, did you smoke weed at the party?"

He blinked at me, stopping in his tracks, a slow but confused smile, appearing on his lips. "No, Asa. You're the little witch. Can't you tell?"

I sniffed indignantly. "I'm not a witch and I'm certainly not little."

"So the little one says."

"I'm not little." I stopped short of stamping my feet and throwing a tantrum. You know, to prove my point.

"I'll be the judge of that." The stars in his eyes wouldn't stop twinkling. "As for your earlier question, no, Asa. I don't do weed. It's not my thing. I hardly ever drink, either, if it's not expensive wine or champagne."

"Ooooh. Classy." I smirked.

But he only rolled his eyes, holding up the elegant pink bottle of wine in his hands. "I blame my mum. I adopted her tastes."

We shared a smile, his grey eyes, twinkling with more excitement than I've ever witnessed from him.

A text came in and I immediately checked my phone, thinking it was from Kam... But it wasn't. It was from Kosi.

Don't do anything I wouldn't do ;-)

I rolled my eyes and put back my phone, disappointment ruining mood.

I knew I shouldn't be feeling like this. I was the one shutting him out after all, rejecting his calls, hiding from him. I shouldn't feel like this.

But the hurt just wouldn't go away.

I took a shaky breath, only to find Amir, staring at me, worriedly.

"Don't kill yourself over him, Asa."

I barked out a sarcastic laugh. "Can't believe you just said that. He's your best friend."

Amir shrugged. "Doesn't make him a saint. You see, we, the rest of the gang, are used to this kind of thing. Once Kam leaves, it's the end. You can't beg him into taking you back."

My lips trembled as my heart throbbed painfully. I bit my lip, blinked back the tears. "We didn't break up, Amir."

He won't leave me... Forever and ever... He promised.

He shook his head. "Once shit hits the fan, he leaves. It's just who he is. He's not the type to stick around, Asa. I've seen this kind of thing play out long before you came into the picture. You're not his first and you won't be his last."

I shook my head, not wanting to believe what Amir was saying, but pieces of when I saw him at the party started sifting through my head. He was laughing with that girl. Completely unbothered.

He didn't care.

I shouldn't care.

But...

"That's not true, Amir. He loves me. What we have... It's different."

Amir looked at me sadly, his eyes, like quicksilver, rolling over gray cobblestoned path. "You really believe that, don't you?"

I stared back at him.

He suddenly reached out and touched my face. "Don't cry, Asa. The night is too beautiful to spend it crying."

I didn't even know the tears were flowing until he started wiping them away.

"I hope, for your sake, what you believe is true. You're an amazing person, and if Kam leaves you, that's his loss."

Against my will, I laughed softly. "You really think so?"

"Yeah."

"Thanks, Amir."

He stood up now, his hand outstretched to me. "Come. Let's have a pity party on the roof. it's cooler outside."

He guided me through the balcony unto the sordid roof.

"If I fall, you're catching me, superman." I told him as he wrapped an arm around my waist.

"Says the girls who's not carrying anything." He grunted.

Under his arm was the bottle of wine and in his left hand was the plate of cookies, chocolateness wafting in the air, curling into my nostrils and I suddenly realized how hungry I was.

We sat at the very edge of the building, snacking on cookies, our legs, dangling over the edge, more that thirty feet up in the air as we watched the busy streets of Lagos, cars, going and coming and men and women in business suits at this time of the day, even though it was late evening.

Amir corked open the bottle of wine and we took turns, sipping from the bottle. It had a strong strawberry flavour that had me licking my lips, only a tiny bit alcoholic.

"So, I want to know more about you, Asa, since I've practically spilled out my guts to you before."

I looked at him, only to find him looking at me, already. That calm intensity, like he was in deep thought.

"Well, what do you want to know?" I asked, taking a bite out of the cookie, nearly moaning at the sweetness.

"Everything."

The softness in his voice made me look at him again. "I want to know everything about you, Asa. Not just bits and pieces."

"You'll have to elaborate, Amir." I rolled my eyes, reaching for another cookie.

"Something happened to you to make you so cold, when you first came here. If the rumours about you aren't true, what is?"

I suddenly lost my appetite, dropping the cookie I was holding. "I don't want to talk about that."

He stared at me and I struggled not to look into his eyes. Then, he sighed wistfully, looking up at the horizon. "It's beautiful, isn't it? This universe."

I followed his gaze, staring into the horizon and had to agree with him.

The setting sun tinged the sky with pink and red and orange and gold. Golden clouds, floating lazily in the orange sky.

He continued. "Ever since we moved, I always liked to come up here and just gaze at Allah's creation. And when my mum died, I contemplated falling off from here, so I could be with her."

I knew by now, how dark Amir was. How deep and complex he was, but to hear him voice out his darkest thoughts... Well... It was overwhelming.

He didn't back down from our stare down, those grey grey eyes of his, held mine, intensely.

I gulped. "Do you still think about it? Do you still think about wanting to be with her."

He smiled calmly now. "I'll answer that if you agree to answer one question. Deal?"

I chewed my lip, but I was worried for him. I wanted to know his reply, so badly, so I accepted. "Deal."

His smile increased and so did his beauty. "Yeah. I still think about being with her. But not in that potentially suicidal way, anymore. It's kind of like a 'we shall meet again in paradise' type of way. You get?"

Oh, good. I relaxed. "So what's your question?"

I trembled under his intense gaze.

"Your father."

I froze. My blood, turning to ice.

"What about him?" I squeaked, heart, pounding ice into my veins.

"You said he died. The rumours say you killed him... So, what really happened?"

My heartbeat picked up. Tears pricked my eyes and my throat suddenly clogged up. "That's none of your business, Amir. Please."

I was trembling now. I gripped the ledge I was sitting on, tightly. I knew I'd soon start hyperventilating and crying profusely. And if I don't calm down, I'd pass out.

I hated my panic attacks.

"We had a deal." He stated calmly.

He was calm while there was a war going on in my head.

She killed him! She just sat there and watched him die!

No, no, I didn't! I didn't know!

Liar! Witch! Your own father.

No! I can explain! I didn't know!

I closed my eyes, hot tears spilling out. I was trembling violently now.

Not wanting Amir to see me like this, I rose to my trembling feet but he was quick to rise with me.

In seconds, he was pulling me to him, my cheeks plastered to his chest, arms going around me. Protective. Comforting.

"It's okay, Asa. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for being so insensitive."

I whimpered into his chest, choking on a sob. On my emotions. My memories.

I don't know how long we stayed like that. I was only aware of his arms and devastating heartbeat. His chin on the top of my hair, his arms, tight and protective. "I'm sorry, Asa."

"It's okay." I croaked. "I walked into that one."

He leaned back now and stared at my face. "You can ask me anything to make up for my stupidity." His thumbs stroked my tears away. His skin was soft, warm against my face. Nothing like I expected. And his eyes...

"Okay." I found myself whispering back.

He held me like that until I calmed down, but one thing I noticed was his heartbeat, racing devastatingly out control, like he was running a marathon.

"We can play honest confessions, but I don't want to go through that formality. You trust me, yeah?"

"Yeah."

His grin was a quick flash of teeth. Silver moondust in his eyes. "Okay."

⊱⋅ ──────────── ⋅⊰

→