Chapter 26: Chapter 26

Something in Myra told her she had been here before, but she couldn’t remember when. Jake’s face was stoic, making her realise how much he resembled his father now. Accepting the hand offered to her, she ducked under his jacket. He used his jacket to cover their heads in the absence of an umbrella.

“Forgot the umbrella.” His voice was low, full of emptiness and a lack of emotion. It didn’t hide the fact that he was in such a low mood.

Jake never brought an umbrella with him. He never thought it was necessary, since it was always him all alone.

“It’s not an issue for me,” she stated bluntly. They seemed like college sweethearts as they both ran in the rain, merely covered under his thick jacket as a canopy. It took away the tenseness in the atmosphere between them, making Myra chuckle as she ran with him, holding hands like children.

At the gate, Jake stopped to retrieve the keys from his pocket before turning it in the rusty lock. Myra didn’t ask where he had the keys. Probably he was the abandoned mansion’s new owner, or maybe not. She didn’t know. The rain was so heavy that it drenched them to the skin, and the answer hardly mattered to her right now.

“Again, we are here,” Jake mumbled, taking the weighted rain jacket from her and wringing it as dry as he could from the rainwater it collected. He then coolly hung it on a wooden chair to continue to air-dry. Myra watched his actions, her eyes glued to him, even though she didn’t say a word.

The mansion had hardly changed from how she remembered it to be in her youth, and much of the furniture remained preserved in mint condition. As Jake encircled the living room, Myra coquettishly peered down at her wet dress, shivering as she held back a sneeze.

“After so long,” she replied monotonously to his words. Jake turned around and took a few steps, closing in on her.

“Myra, the conversation we had earlier in the car. Who makes your heart beat faster?”

His proximity to her made her heart race. She shivered again from the coldness of her damp clothes.

Jake placed his arms firmly on Myra’s shoulders, pulling down the straps of her dress and letting the dress fall to the floor. She stood before him in her half-nakedness, unsure how to answer him. Turning away, he took off his outer shirt, handing it to her to cover her modesty. She pulled it over her semi-nudity without further consideration.

Jake’s shirt was warm and carried his scent. An unsettled feeling overwhelmed her, burdening her with the guilt that accompanied her all these weeks. The more she got carried away by Jake, the more she knew she was sinning. Thinking about Hart’s sweet words during their time in Bali made her feel even more pressured.

That was just what she had done. Broken his promises. She felt like a criminal. Everything made her feel conflicted. She felt lost, like a child who could not find the right path home. She knew what she was doing was seriously wrong, yet she couldn’t control her emotions.

“Forget it. You don’t have to answer me,” he said coldly, disregarding her flustered emotions.

“No.” Myra was quick to defend herself. “I’m with Hart now, it’s him who I was with. Even though I loved you first, I already accepted him.”

Jake counted to five. He fought his anger, recalling his anger management lessons, and attempted to remain calm. He almost had it all, but he had ruined it. No matter what, he couldn’t lose this time. He couldn’t lose to a man like Hatta Baderan.

“Look at me and tell me that is what you mean from the heart, Myra.”

He cupped her face rather forcefully, compelling her to look at him.

Myra closed her eyes. “I can’t anymore, Jake. Even if we were to get married, my feelings for you won’t change. You let me down first, Jake. I moved on.” Her words were contradicting her true feelings, but this was what she had to do. She was in a relationship and couldn’t continue to err.

She couldn’t go on like this. It was slowly killing her from the inside.

Her words struck Jake in the heart. He released her slowly, clenching his fists.

“Myra, are you sure this is what you want?” His voice boomed. She had never seen him so irate before. But there was nothing more she could do to avoid giving him false hope.

He rained punch after punch on the wall, but she said not a word further. Only after he had battered and bloodied his knuckles, he finally stopped. The rain was cruel. It made him feel bitter, even more pain than from what she had given him.

Until the rain stopped, there was nothing but silence between them. What had started off with steamy kisses between them was only a gust of wind. It was too late for him to recover from the love he had lost. This time, he knew he had truly lost.

He hadn’t lost to Hatta Baderan. He had lost her to time. The more he contemplated what he said, the more he was falling further away from her. He felt as if something had ripped away a crucial part of himself.

Jake walked from the mansion, closing the door after him. He stood outside in the chilly night, watching the gloominess of the dark skies above him. Eventually, after what felt like an extremely long time, he took one last glance through the glass windowpane.

She was sleeping soundly, as if nothing had happened.

………………………………………………………….

Jake gathered his thoughts as he pranced outside the old house. Originally, he thought that taking her here would bring back the old memories and that drunken encounter between them. But his efforts turned out fruitless.

It was an endless circle. It seemed no matter what he did or how they attracted each other, she still valued her two months relationship with Hatta Baderan. Two months versus how they had known each other since forever. Why had it all turned out this way?

All because of one mistake he made over his own selfishness during the trip to Bali. He asked himself that question many times, repeatedly, but to no avail.

Why had he been that douchebag that time, when she genuinely wanted to be with him?

Ignoring the raindrops splashing over his head, he stood carelessly under the rain. Even if it made him sick as a result, it was worth it. He deserved it. It was nothing compared to how she would continue to treat him.

He reached out and slapped himself across the face. It hurt, but just for a few quick seconds. He despised himself for getting into such a mess. Making her jealous so that she would treat him differently, then losing her to that foreigner. And now her rejection burdened him. Even if they had an attraction to each other and they were to be married, how could he accept the fact Myra had that other man in her heart?

His heart sank with all the thoughts running through his mind. Fine, if this was what he wanted, he would give her all the time she needed. He would request for his father to delay their engagement while she dated happily with Hatta Baderan.

In the meantime, he would look for ways to help her with her father and the joint businesses she had with her father. It was hard, but he had to. In time, he would prove to Myra he was a changed man.