Chapter 82: Chapter 82

◇ KEL ◇

"Just waiting for the doctors' clearance. Then I'm taking you home."

Home.

The word just perked up my senses.  I stirred under the covers.  What he said and the certainty in his tone was messing up my resolve to seem distant and unconcerned.

For some reason, he thought I preferred that he stayed alone with me in the room.  Was he finally going to take me home? To my family?

"Maybe tomorrow." Miles pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Who said I can leave? What time?"

"Soon as the doctor lets you."

Finally. Thank God!  I had been waiting for this news all morning.

Missing important school days, tired of the lethargy, and sick of the solitary confinement, I let an idea foster in my excited brain.

What if I asked him to come with me to New York?  Would he even consider it for a second?  I hoped so.  The thought of being with him on a plane back to America sounded better than me traveling alone for the rest of the day.

It seemed scary to some extent, but...  Would he say yes if I asked?  Probably not.  But at least the medical team already deemed me physically able to leave the hospital.

After a minute or so of silence, Miles cleared his throat. "We good now?"

I sat on the bed and studied him, his bad mood, his tousled hair covering most of his face. Then I noticed his pupils looked unusually round.

Shit.  Not again.

"You're high."

"Pains again." He shrugged with nonchalance. "Had to take something."

It was not what I expected, but his behavior earlier now made a lot of sense.  Seeing him being that violent just shocked me to my core.  I had expected he would physically hurt Enzo just for showing up here unannounced, but I didn't quite expect Miles would actually beat him up.  Inside a freakin' hospital, no less.

"Drugs won't work forever."

He covered his mouth after frowning at my comment. "I know that."

"You're killing yourself." I shook my head in dismay. "You need pain management therapy. Not drugs." Hard, illicit drugs, to be exact.

"I'm choosing the obviously easier route."

I watched him as he stood next to the bed, his pupils even darker up-close. "Why won't you just ask?"

At my muted question, Miles shook his head faintly and chuckled. "No.  Not talking about this again."

"Why not?"

His bloodstained knuckle covered his face and hid the vein straining beneath his forehead.  A moment of tense silence passed before he spoke again.  "You got a lot on your...calendar. You don't have time."

"You need it. For the pain."

"No."

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Right. Fine. He didn't want to hurt me again.  I understood that.  It sounded reasonable.

But what he really wanted to say was...his problems were not my responsibility.

I knew.  I didn't need to hear him say it again.  And here I thought we were finally making progress...

It was clear.  He'd rather sort it out himself than ask for my help.

"I just wanna help you."

"You're going back home;  I got a job to do here.  How's that gonna work?"  Miles backed off now, seeming truly bothered by the conversation.  He got up from the bed and glanced to the door.

His insistence just messed up my thoughts even more.  Why was he so stubborn about it?  I just wanted to help him out and be done with this relapse.  But he seemed to want to go on this toxic, life-threatening path with his often excessive drug use.

"We've tried some therapy before," I muttered. "It worked, didn't it?"

"Don't have time for that."

I stared into his tired eyes, my fists almost clenching at his stubborn behavior and adamance. "So you're just gonna keep using? Till you overdose?"

"No." Miles held back his scowl and checked his phone. "I gotta go—"

"Now?" I pulled a face. "Why? What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"Miles."

"Get some rest."

"What's wrong?" I caught his wrist to stop him from rushing towards the door.

For a moment, he wouldn't even look at me as I stood in front of him.  Eventually his posture slackened when I pulled him in for a hug.

"Don't leave," I murmured.  "You just got here."

As if surprised by my request, he carefully put his arms around me.  His cheek now pressed onto my temple.

Why wouldn't he just talk to me?  Was he still upset because I let Enzo into the room?  "I'm sorry."

"I told you to stay away from him." He sighed and sat on the bed. Miles stared at my face while his frown eased.

I sat next to him, wrinkling the blue blanket, his warmth such a comfort to my cold skin. "I don't like him that way."

He scoffed and grinned lopsidedly for a second.  "Good to know."

Despite his retort, I kept a sarcastic reply to myself.  At the moment, all I could focus on was his bleeding knuckle distracting me from the unmistakable longing in his beautiful hazel eyes.

"Do I need to tell you why I don't want him near you?" He kissed me gently.

"No."

"Good." He pulled me closer. Miles held my face to kiss me again.  This time it didn't feel chaste or restrained.  He pressed his soft lips against mine until my heartbeat got too loud it drowned out all rational thought.

"What're we—"

"I missed you." His arm pulled me to him till I was almost straddling him on the hospital bed.  Miles stroked my lower lip with his warm tongue, almost begging to feel every inch of my mouth.  He didn't stop.  He kissed me harder. He hugged me tighter. He kept me on his lap, my chest touching his, our breaths getting unsteady.

Resisting it just felt idiotic at this point.  I ignored the tiny voice in my head warning me of everything, scaring me with a damning list of consequences.

But, whatever.  I wanted this.  A lot.

The longing and the constant loneliness had been awful.  I needed this.  I needed his attention. Affection. Badly.

He moaned throatily when I leaned onto him with my hands holding onto his tense neck and shoulders.  His strong arms kept me on his lap while I kissed him back,  my thighs almost aching and now pressing onto his crotch.  He'd never felt this warm.  Not this heated, uninhibited, and straightforwardly intense.

I loved it.  Being this close to him.  Being this intimate with him.  It was just a constant thought in my gullible, lovedrunk head.  This kind of intimacy with him didn't seem possible.  Until now.

"Fuck it." Miles kissed and tasted every inch of my neck with his skilled mouth, and his quick, calloused hand snuck under the hospital gown to stroke my inner thigh.

I near gasped when his fingers touched my underwear and hastily tugged at the thin waistband.  I held onto his strong, tense shoulders and let him kiss me again, his tongue just hot and wet against mine.

Holy guacamole.

It's happening...

Really happening.

No backing out now.

He froze on the bed when I tensed up, but he continued kissing me, coaxing me with his lips and adept hands.  Miles held me by the waist with his arm wrapped tight around my back.  Clumps of his wavy hair partly covered his handsome face.

I pushed them aside and tried hard to ignore the loud thumps in my rib cage.  My bruises were aching a bit but I didn't care;  I just wanted to keep kissing him.  When his hand under my thin gown squeezed my thigh,  nothing felt better than the feel of his touch on my sensitive skin.  It woke up every bit of me.

"I missed you," he repeated in between breaths and our almost frantic kisses.  Now our legs got tangled with the blanket.  His arm kept my hips pressed onto his while my entire body felt all of him.

It felt really good.  To be wanted by him.  To be kissed and touched this way.  It felt right.  But it scared me, too.  How could he just make me succumb to everything with a simple kiss?

The truth just made me weak.  I didn't want it to end, but we should hit pause on everything now.   We weren't alone.   I could hear faint footsteps right outside the door.

Some guys talking...

Then somebody swearing in Italian.

Every inch of me froze.

"Sorry!" Alessio turned his back to us so fast his head spun.

I flinched when something hard just hit my head.

Miles got up too quick that his forehead bumped onto mine.  The next second, I fell onto his side and landed on the bed with a thud.

Darn it.  Alessio saw all of it! Ugh!

Now he looked mortified after the most awkward silence ever. "Mi dispiace." He slightly bowed his head in our direction.

My entire face was already scorching after his second apology.  Did he even knock?

"Get the fuck out," Miles snapped.

"Sorry. I left my..." Alessio muffled a small chuckle with his fist. He sounded less apologetic and a tad more entertained now. "Left my...erm...headset."

"Fucking knock, would you? Fuck's sake." Miles stood by the foot of the bed now to hide my partial nudity, giving me ample privacy and enough time to swiftly fix my hospital gown.

"The doctor said she shouldn't..."  Alessio tried not to grin again but failed.  His reaction looked even more amused now.  "She just had surgery.  Fresh stitches and—"

"Get out. Grab lunch with the guys."

"Sorry, Kel. Really."  Alessio couldn't stop snickering while Miles kept his back to me.  "Just need to... I think I left it here, somewhere."

Miles grabbed something wiry on the couch and threw it towards his bodyguard.  "Get out."

"Looks like you broke the guy's nose."

"I said out, Alei." Miles grunted and tentatively turned to face me.

"Also..." Alessio cleared his throat and pointed to the door. "Your Mamma and Pappa are outside."

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