Chapter 9: Chapter 9

The concealer hid Lavender's thick eyebags. She was crying last night over and over. She let out a heavy sigh and stared at her own reflection in the mirror.

"So this is the time…" she whispered to herself as she held back tears. She doesn't want to cry until she has told everything to the young man, she may feel more belittled. When she went downstairs, she found her mother talking to Yaya MG. When she noticed her, she quickly approached her and hugged her.

"Mom, wish me luck." she uttered on its shoulder.

"Why, sweetie?"

"Just pray that what I am going to do today will be successful, Mom." The lady just nodded and gently stroked her back.

It was earlier than she said when she arrived at Casa Romantica. Not too many people were there. Only the melody of the melodious music makes the Casa noisy.  She has no plans to stay in the area for long. When the man arrives and after she has said everything, she will also leave.

Lavender glared at her own watch. She still had decided to wait for the young man for a few more minutes. This is the last time they will talk and she will meet the man so she can't leave.

The girl looked around sadly. The very place she is sitting now is also the place of their first date with the young man. The orchestra now playing in the foreground is also the accompaniment that played that night. That night was still fresh for Lavender. The night of the girl's first kiss is still sealed.

Lavender looked at her watch again. Half an hour has passed but the young man is still not there. The girl was startled when her phone suddenly rang. She pulled it out of her small shoulder pack and her Mommy's name was registered there.

"Yes, Mom?" she answered lazily.

"Come home, sweetie. Your daddy is looking for you."

"All right. After this, Mom. I'll go home."

"Okay, sweetie, bye. I love you."

"I love you too, Mom."

None of her own she returned the cellphone to the bag. She glanced at her watch once again, rolled her eyes across Casa Romantica then decided to get up and leave. But as she raised her eyes, Mars was already standing in front of her. His eyes were staring sadly at her, his hair was messy and his left hand was bloody. Lavender was worried about what she saw, but she overcame the impulse and didn't let it be obvious to the young man. She averted her eyes from him. She felt him walk closer to her so she backed away.

"Mars, just please... don't come near." she stopped him. "Can I just turn around so that I can't see the anger and disgust in your face when I tell you everything?" Lavender said sadly. "Mars, I don't know where I will start. I don't know what I will say to you first. But of all the things, I will say and admit to you tonight, I will begin to apologize. I hope you will forgive me." The girl wiped a few tears from her eyes. "Mars, in the very short time and moment we were together, I felt the true love that I had only dreamed of then. Your companion gave me the opportunity to get to know you better. During the days, hours, mornings and nights we spent together, I was happy, my day was complete and I had a reason to move on and persevere in life.” She wiped away the tears that were dripping from her eyes and continued. "Being with you made me realize that there are really things in the world that you can't force. It made me realize that loving you is the greatest happiness I made... but I forgot that I'm the only one who is happy. I forgot not that it's not real. I'm being selfish. I didn't think about how you would feel. I didn't think that more people would be affected, I just let go of my emotions and I forgot that I was hurting you." She sobbed during those times. She heard his footsteps approaching.

"Just stay there, Mars, please just be there. Don't come near. Please." She continued speaking. "You know, since we were kids I have asked for nothing but to be with and talk to you properly. I have nothing else to ask but I hope we can have at least an hour together even if it's short then it's okay. I have no choice but to make you notice me. So when I had the opportunity to be with you I didn't waste it, I didn't hesitate to do anything in return as long as I can be with you. Now it made me realize that even if you were with me, I would still not be happy." Lavender let out a sigh of relief. "The truth is I charmed you. Everything you say and do to me while we are together is just the result of that potion. That day when we dated, that day and night we were in Baguio, even your separation from Alexa is a lie. It's my entire fault and even one of the things you told me doesn't make sense. Not one of them has come true."

The girl's face looks like a sea because of the amount of tears accumulated. But she was not done yet, she had to tell him everything. This is the time she has been waiting for.

"Mars, I know you're mad at me now, you have the right to be angry. If you want to swear at me, I will accept the pain in my heart because I totally deserve it all. I can't blame you if after that you won't talk to me anymore. I can't blame you if you don't want to see me again. But the only thing that will never change is that I love you. I really love you and it wasn't a lie." The girl wiped the tears with her palms and spoke again.

"Don't worry, this will be the last time you see me. I'll never appear in your life again. No naughty and annoying Lavender will bother you. There will be no liar Lavender in your life. Hopefully, this time I have given you happiness. When you lose me in your life, I hope you will be happy." Lavender let out a heavy blow before she slowly faced the man. She saw him just staring at her. She let out a forced smile and walked closer to him. Lavender held his bleeding hand and the young man didn't take his eyes off her.

"Say the magic word, Mars. Say I love you and I will be gone from your life." He just stared at her as if he had not heard anything. "Please, Mars, I want you to be free." Tears flowed from her eyes. "Please…"

Mars caressed her lip. Gradually, he brought her face closer and kissed her.

"I love you." He whispered in her ear. That made her sobbing becomes loud.

"Thank you, you're free now." The girl took a band-aid from the bag and put it to the young man's wound. She smiled at him, patted his shoulder before finally passing by him.

Lavender spilled her tears in the car. She almost bathed in her own tears. It hurts so much to love. It hurts to sacrifice. Only now did she realize that it's not that easy to love. If only she could bring back yesterday. If only she could change and stop the time. It would be better for the young man not to pay attention to her as long as she sees it all the time, unlike now that she will never see even a shadow of him.

A week later, Lavender's former normal life seemed to return. Even though it was still fresh in the girl's mind, she was slowly rising. The done is done, she has to forget the young man and she means it the hard way. She didn't have to suffer for very long. If she wants to get up and forget the young man easily, she needs to turn her attention to other things. She has already planned her activities for the next few months. She left the young man's flower shop, she talked well with Tita Cynthia and Tito Joaquin why he had to leave the flower shop.

Time passed quickly. She finally finished processing the documents needed to go to Japan. She also didn't hear any news from the young man. Maybe it was having fun with Alexa. She didn't bother to think about him herself but instead focused on what would happen to her in Japan.

She couldn't sleep well that night. Only in the morning did her eyes remain open. At six o'clock in the morning, when her parents took her to the NAIA, Gertrude was also there crying as she hugged her before entering the Departures Area. Lavender waved at them before finally climbing the plane ramp. She looked around the place one last time. Tears started to well up in her eyes without her realizing it. She is leaving the Philippines, she is going to study abroad and she will completely forget the young man.

"Goodbye." She bid her farewell as she realized that maybe they weren’t really destined for each other.