Chapter 27: Chapter 27

We got to the Settlement which was one of the largest I have ever seen very quickly and instead of staying in a house provided for me, I optioned to staying with Sorens in his family home which was still there and his mother too.

I didn’t know what I was expecting when he said I would see his mother but it was not a frail looking woman who looked like she was made of leaves and will be swept away by the wind if the air around her changed.

“Mother.” Sorens hugged her tightly and I was tempted to yell at him not to break her but the woman smiled with tears in her eyes as she hugged him back.

“My son.” She said as she placed a hand on his chest and he closed his eyes as if he was savoring her touch.

When she removed her hand from his chest, she glanced at me and then at her son.

“Who is this?” She asked.

“The queen.” Sorens replied her and when she tried to bow, I stopped her.

“You don’t have to do that, if only for giving birth to a wonderful man like Sorens, if not for him, I would not be alive. He has saved me so many times over that I should be the one bowing down to you for giving birth to him. I replied and in response to my words, she blushed and then gestured at a Nisse.

“Take the Queen to the best room here. That is where she will be staying while they are around.” She ordered the Nisse who bowed to her and then me.

Soren spoke. “After helping her to get settled in, I want you to bring her back, we have to get going soon. We need to look at old records today before she focus on what has been happening here.”

The Nisse gave a nod as she left, expecting me to follow her and I was until I left the sight of the mother and son only to hear Sorens mother’s voice grow harsh, I stopped so I could listen to her more.

“Why do you like getting yourself hurt son, she is married, to the king. She is not going to ever be yours, stop this infatuation you have with her.”

“That is where you are wrong mother, I wish it was infatuation but it is not. I love her, mother. And …”

“Enough son.” Sorens mother said, her voice becoming weak again. “This love you have of her is going to kill you one day.”

“I know.” Soren replied quietly and he added something else but it was too low for me to hear him so I quickly ran after the Nisse who was a little far from me and was waiting patiently.

I tried to shut out the conversation I just heard that was clearly about me and not meant for my ears but I couldn’t.

Sorens liked me and I didn’t like him that way.

I was going to hurt his feelings and maybe lose one of my only friends here.

********

“My queen, is there something I did wrong?” Sorens asked me as I peered into the scrolls in front of me covered with dust, they were written on with a foreign language but that was not the problem I was having, the problem I was having was that most of the words were washed out on purpose and it only happened to scrolls about the forgotten world even the ones written about the new world after that were in tact, they were written at the same time but it was like the world was supposed to be forgotten.

“What did you say?” I asked Sorens while staring at the scroll and acting like I didn’t her him the first time, he knew I did, my body tensed but I didn’t look at him, I have not being able to look at him since his confession to his mother. Who likes knowing that they will be the cause and possible reason for the death of their friend?

“You heard me the first time Gwenn, please don’t act like you didn’t.” Soren replied and I sighed.

“You did nothing wrong Sorens, why will you think that?” I gave a nervously which completely discredited all my words.

“Oh, you heard my conversation with my mother, didn’t you?” He asked as i turned away from him.

“What conversation?” I asked, trying to keep my hands busy and slowly moving away from Sorens, calculating the distance I need to get to before I will make a good excuse and run into the company of others so I would not have this conversation right now. I was not ready for it at all.

“Gwenn?” Sorens called but I refused to look at him. The next thing I felt was his arms around my waist and his face on my shoulders.

“I am sorry, that was not the way I wanted you to learn about my feelings. Gwenn, I love you.”

I froze at his words. I wasn’t expecting them and I didn’t know what to do with them, now that he said it.

“Sorens…” I started.

“I am sorry, I didn’t mean to drop this on you now, I just wanted you to know that I love you. You might not get a happy ending with the king but I can try to provide you with one…” He rushed out like he was trying to convince me but I turned to him and laid a hand on his face.

“Sorens…”

“We can make it work.” He added.

I shook my head at him. “No, we can’t as much as I would like to think that we can make it work but we can’t. When I said I was not meant for a happy ending, I meant it. I can only have that with my husband and my husband only. I am sorry for hurting you but I can remain your friend.”

“You don’t love him, you know that. Why are you waiting for someone who has proven, time and again that he only has hurt waiting for you.” He demanded and I shook my head.

“Because he is my husband and I have strong values about marriage, values you would never understand.” I tell him with a sad smile. Some scares given by parents run so deep that they can never truly heal. “Find someone nice Sorens, have a home. Build a family. Those are things that will never be associated to me and you.” I said as I left him behind while cleaning my eyes, I will not let the tears fall.

It would be so easy to love someone who was crazy about you but I have learnt my lesson. Never create complications in a marriage. My mother did that and my father killed her, I was the complication in Baxter’s life even though I met him first, same thing with Arius. I was already in one complication, I didn’t want to be ion another when a girl whom Sorens eventually shows up because she will. I would have given my heart to Sorens then only to be hurt when he destroys it, just like Baxter. The least hurtful one I can be in that will not hurt me is with Arius, he was mine and not mine.

It’s only with him I can have my happily ever after, my fate was tied to his when I said ‘I do’ and so it will be forever, I will not create the complication from my side although I will never let him know that.

Life was an irony. The only person I was allowed to love was my husband whom I hate.