Chapter 13: Chapter 13

Looking down at myself I am truly in awe. I feel so beautiful. The sash of the dress when applied makes it an even greater choice. The fabric is cinched in over the top of my stomach and highlights the flare of my hips. My breasts are slightly pushed up and more pronounced. Half of my hair lies in a ponytail while the rest flows down the back of my dress. They have such a nice contrast. The flower I chose to wear in my hair is placed right above my ear on the right. I chose this side because of when Draco brushed my head back. When I sniff the air in my room all I smell is the sweet aroma of the blossoms I added to the bath. Truly hope he likes what he sees when he arrives.

I slip my geta on my feet and go to sit at the table until he arrives. I would not want to be rushing again and injure him. I decide it would be best to leave the door cracked. The sun is high in the sky, and I know that any moment he will walk through that door. So, I wait, and I wait. The time seems to be passing so slowly.

I wonder what we will do today. I know that he is bringing me a gift so maybe what he has planned has to do with that. I hope it is something to read. I have always dreamed about a lover who reads to me. I bet things would sound so much better coming from his deep baritone. I sigh. Listening to his voice for a while would be better than a gift of parchment. When I shake out of my musings, I realize that quite some time has passed. I go to look out the door to see if I see him walking from his village and see that the sun has well passed midday. Ah well maybe he is just running a bit late from his studies is all. I have to keep my faith. He gave me his word that he would be here. He would not lie to me. Or would he? I do barely know him.

I shake my head and get up to begin pacing. That is just your father getting into you head Io I say to myself. But what if he is not coming? What would that mean?

When my feet start to hurt from pacing, I decide to take my seat again. The sun shining through the windows has now turned gold. Soon it will be considered late, and we will not have much time. Maybe when he gets here, he will be hungry. I should make us something to eat. I start the fireplace and open a curtain so I can have a view to see him walking to the hut when he comes. I gather a pot for water and place the hardened rice in with water. I hang it to boil and cook. I grab some of the herbs we have on the counter and begin to chop them. They will go nicely in the rice. I chop the other vegetables we have and place them into the pot of rice to boil. Vegetable rice is one of fathers’ favorite meals, but I hope Draco will like it to.

Outside the window that I have left open the light of the sun has changed. The warm tones signal that we are upon the hour of sunset. As I take off the heated dish and put out the fire, I look down at my beautiful pink dress to see that it is in ruin. I have spots of ash and stains from the green vegetables on it. I should have taken more care. A tear slips down my cheek at having all my effort ruined.

When I hear the creek of the door I look up in excitement and brush my hands on my sides in nervousness. When the gaze of my father meets mine, my smile drops in disappointment. He looks worn from his day of work and is covered in dirt. Swinging my gaze to the window I watch as the last rays of sunset drift into dark and more tears stream down my face. At this moment I finally realize, Draco is not coming.

My father takes a step toward me arms raised as if he means to embrace me. I turn from him and head to my room. I know he is not to blame for the pain and anger I feel. He did only try to warn me. However, now I know he was right. I am just a naive girl. I should not have put it trust into Draco so soon. I feel stupid.

In my room I change out of the beautiful dress that is now ruined. I place it into my wardrobe and put on my brown dress. It is a fitting choice for how crappy I feel. I turn toward the door and pause to wipe my face. It is time for supper with my father. I want to avoid showing my pain to him if I can. So, I take a deep breath and head to the table. I make our plates and take a seat.

When I look up, I see that he too has changed. His face and hands are no longer covered in dirt. He begins to eat immediately while I, no longer hungry push my food around my plate. As my eyes water again at the thought to how the day has gone, I focus on my fork as it whirls around the plate. I watch it whirl and whirl and whirl.

“Io, dear” my father says. I snap out of my state and sit taller in my chair. I did not even realize I had dropped to lean onto the table as if it were the only thing keeping me upright. “I am sorry you are hurting. You must know I did not want this for you. Is there anything I can do” he offers?

“No, father. I’m only tired and wish to go to bed” I reply. I walk my plate to the counter and sit it there. Then waving goodbye to my father I go to my room. I lay on my kang and look at the ceiling. As I stare on my vision gets blurry. When I wipe my eyes, I see the tears on the tips of my fingers. I barely knew him. It is so silly to cry, I think. But somehow, I cannot stop them. So, I cry and cry until I can no longer produce tears. My eyes stay watered, and my vision stays blurry. When I catch my breath, it is with a strong hitch. Wiping my tears away I am reminded of when he did it after the story of my mother. My tears flow freely once more and this time they do not stop until I have cried myself to sleep.