Chapter 21: Chapter 21

Husnah's Point Of View.

Five years later...

"Amirah! Zan mareki fa. Come on go and return that ice cream before I beat you up". I scolded

"Plush mummy" she whined as I collected the ice cream.

"You won't have another ice cream Amirah. And that's final!".

"No! I want an ish cyem" she screamed, jumping up and down, rolling on the floor.

"What's wrong ne wai?" Mom asked, walking down the stairs.

"Tell mummy to gimme me my ish cyem" Amirah said, holding mom by her wrapper.

"You won't have another ice cream fa Amirah. Now shut up before I beat the hell out of you".

The living room grew silent as she kept quite, doing nothing but sniffing.

"Leave your mummy alone sweetheart. I'll cook noodles for you. Zakici koh?" Mom asked as she cooed her.

Amirah only nodded in response as mom took her by her left hand and went to the kitchen.

I heaved a sigh as I gave her a glance. She looked exactly like her father. The more she grew, the more she looked like Nabeel. The only part she looked like me was her long hair, those big eyes with lashes.

I was deep in my thoughts when my phone rang, bringing me out of my reverie.

It was Amal!

"Sis" I chirped in.

"I missed you. When are you coming?" She asked sadly.

"Oh come on silly, you were married off just three weeks ago... it's too early to pay you a visit miss". I answered, rolling my eyes.

"Haba Addah!" Amal whined, "I miss you hell nuts mana. Just to come over to keffi ne wahala? Please, please my one and only Addah. I want to see baby Amirah".

"Cut the crap miss. I really am not coming to keffi anytime soon, get used to it. Ce miki akayi auren wasa ne?" I said.

"Fine!" She uttered almost screaming, "karki zo din. I don't even want to see that dummy face of yours again".

I laughed my heart out. God! I loved Amal so very very much "Lies. I bet you miss me more than mom".

"You wish" she snorted before cutting off the call. And then, that empty feeling... that feeling that I didn't belong to this world or that I was just born into it without knowing anyone crept back. My life had been nothing other than being a mess those part years. Yeah! I messed. Haven't I told you guys that I was divorced? With a 4year two months old baby girl?

I heard footsteps, and I knew who were approaching. Who else other than mom and Amirah.

"You won't eat ma nooduls" Amirah said sitting beside me with a small plate of steaming noodles.

I only smiled at her waiting to see how she would eat such a hot noodles.

"Wayyoo bakina!" She screamed and I couldn't help but laughed at her.

"I thought you were acting all tough and stubborn? Good for you. Now come over and let me feed you".

"O'o" she pouted grabbing the plate from my hands "gyandma is going to feed me. Ni kika ma dayiya koh? Ba luwana dake" she added.

"You and your daughter dai! Don't you have anything to do other than fighting?". Mom blurted.

"Mom," I started. "you know how stubborn she is fa" i said making a sad face.

"So?" Mom asked, raising one of her brows, "does that mean you do nothing other than pick at her? Act like a grown up for once miss".

"Alright mom. I will" I said, leaving the sitting room... making my way upstairs.

It was so irritating how everything looked like. I was back to my father's house but it felt like a part of me was somewhere else, like a missing part. I sank into my bed, deep in thoughts. Every time I looked at Amirah, my heart sank. Why? Because her dad didn't even know of her existence. Why would he when he claimed the pregnancy wasn't his? When he looked into my eyes and told me I was cheating on him. That day will forever be embedded in my heart. 'There is no way, I mean absolutely no way I am ever going to forget that!'. Mom had cried for days, I remembered how dad went days without going out. How my elder brothers acted, claiming of taking everything to the court.

My life crumbled in just a blink of an eye. I mean what's more painful than your husband accusing you of cheating on him with his best friend? Yes, actually Nabeel accused me of cheating on him with Fahad!

I heard a soft knock on my door before mom's head popped in. She was carrying Amirah on her shoulders and walked quietly to her pink little bed, laying her down before coming over and sitting beside me.

"It's been five years since the incident took place. I know it's hard sweetheart, but can't you please go a day without thinking about everything and facing reality? You've send almost five guys away... give them a chance please. Husnah you are not growing any younger fa".

I snorted, turning my gaze away from her and wiping a tear with my thumb. 'Damn harmones!'.

"I'm okay mom" I said slowly still averting my gaze, "everything just seem so new, like...." I trailed off as tears fall down my cheeks, "where did i go wrong mom?" I asked looking straight into her eyes this time around.

I felt so warm. What just happened? I was engulfed in mom's warm embrace and I just didn't know when I broke down completely. It had been five years already goddammit! Why couldn't I let go? Why couldn't I give another guy a chance to be with me?. Was I still in love with Nabeel? Hell No!. Even if I did loved him, it was impossible to go back!

Why impossible? Because he pronounced it three times. You know what I mean right? Well I'm not going to explain. Figure it out yourself.

"Ssh..." mom said, her hands moving slowly on my back... to and fro. "This isn't the end. Who knows, maybe Nabeel was never the best for you? Allah knows what's best for you sweetheart and believe me when I say you'll find someone better, way better than Nabeel".

"I don't know mom. I just want to believe that everything was a dream and not the truth. What will I tell Amirah when she grew up and start asking about her dad? What should I tell her? That he sent her mom parking for cheating on him or what? Tell me mom".

"Look at me" mom said cupping my face "This isn't the end, it's just the beginning. I trust the daughter I gave birth to. This is your fate, try passing it. Allah is testing your Imaan sweetheart... It's never the end. I've always been praying for you. In Shaa Allah, your life will be filled with lots of love and Barakah".

I fought back my tears smiling, "I love you so much mom" I said, giving her a bone crushing hug.

"Easy on an old woman. Do you want to break my bones?".

"I was just hugging you" I pouted

"I love you more sweetheart".

*****

"Is ancle khayiy (khaleel) byinging (bringing) saleem and saleema with him?" Amirah asked as I packed her hair into a pony tail.

"Yes" I answered.

"Yeeeyyy" she jumped happily "and you're taking us to the park ryh?" She asked looking at me hopefully.

"Nope baby" I answered adjusting her gown, "they'll be too tired to go out today when they arrive, so I'll take you guys out tomorrow okay?".

"Okay" she answered sadly.

I smiled at her and shook my head. This girl sure looked like her dad. And I thanked Allah everyday for making her look like Nabeel, even though he didn't cared to check on me nor the baby since I left his house and the encounter in the hospital. His parents do used to visit and they also didn't talk about him. Great! Just great!.

"Go to grandma, I'll be down in few seconds" I said to her.

I turned to look at my reflection on the mirror. I haven't change one bit, even though I used to think too much, but something changed in me. I wasn't the fashion like, I bet you guys knows that... but after coming back home, I loved fashion. Amal always talking about my horrible look during those trying times made me apply little makeup to hide my ugly face. yeah.

But today, I looked so different. I kind of have this urge to waste some time in front of the dressing mirror and look my best. I wouldn't want Addah summy's quizzical eyes to look at me like I did something terrible.

I smiled at my reflection looking contented with my look.

"Mummy" I heard Amirah shouting on top of her voice, "shun isho" she shouted again.

'Ugghhh! This girl sure knows how to drive me nuts!'.

Mom always used to say I was like that when I was young. I just hoped she was joking around. (Giggles).

I strolled down the hallway and through the steps. My shoes making silly sounds. I could hear Amirah's high pitched voice talking to whosoever it is I really didn't know.

I greated everyone, hugging Addah summy and Hamma khaleel pinching my nose.

"Mom" I pouted, "tell him to stop teasing me" I said.

"Miss" hamma glared at me, "can't you see a new face around?" He asked gesturing behind me.

I turned slowly and my eyes almost missed a beat.

'Who the hell is this?'.

***** ***** ****