Chapter 27: Chapter 27

Raymond sucked deeply on his cigarette, to meet his lung cavity, then blew smoke into the air, which immediately integrated with the cold air of Cirillo City. From where he was now—in the balcony where he used to smoke, he could see mountains of snow that have piled up covering the roofs of people's houses and several public facilities, while office buildings are completely undisturbed by snow because they had an automatic snow removal feature that he did not know how it worked. He only heard it from Rachel yesterday, when he was forced to invite Rachel and her friends to eat at a restaurant after he left Martha. Unexpectedly, Rachel was the type who was very interested in architecture and technology, so that the woman explained it enthusiastically, in a simple way but still difficult for him to understand.

Well, what people said was true. Don't judge the book by its cover.

Even though he invited Rachel because there was no choice. But now he found Rachel a very attractive woman—though still not as attractive as Hazel or Edward. He thought Rachel was just the type of spoiled woman who loved looking for man's attention using her charm as a woman, but that was wrong. Rachel was just the type of person who really cares about her co-workers. In fact, even though the woman was not close to Hazel, the woman had asked him about Hazel, who she thought had changed. Putting aside how many times Rachel mispronounced Hazel's name as Azel and how annoying the woman was in his first day at the cafe, he did not deny that Rachel was not a bad person. If only she knew that Hazel was jealous of her. What her reaction would be?

He went back to smoking his mint-smelling cigarette, enjoying the scent of the cigarette while listening to metal rock music—his favourite playlist music, neatly arranged by his virtual assistant in a low voice so as not to disturb the neighbours. What he liked the most about metal rock music was their expressiveness, especially when the vocalist sang in a shrill voice accompanied by the drummers beating the drum and fast-paced play guitar sounds. Everything in metal rock music always helped to calm him down.

Back when Arnold was still alive, his friend always complained when he played his favourite music, asking him to listen more to the classical music which always succeeded to make him sleep in a minute. Arnold also recommended music from his favourite classical opera music, saying that it would suit him well. Yes, suitable as a sleeping pill.

‘You smoke again, Raymond,’ said Hazel, who approached him from behind holding two cups of hot chocolate, then handed the cup in her left hand to Raymond.

‘Thanks. The smoking ban has been lifted, right? That means I'm free to continue my old habits,’ Raymond accepted the hot cup, then placed it on the balcony backrest. ‘You don't work at the bookstore today?’

‘Not. I'm taking some day off.’

He wanted to ask why Hazel was taking the day off, but he was reluctant to ask her. Given that he was no longer a part of Hazel's life, he can't interfere in her personal matters. He paused, took his cigarette away from his lips and took a sip of Hazel's chocolate drink which was perfect for today's cold weather.

Then the atmosphere turned silent. None of them spoke at all, only gazing at a sight that was honestly not very attractive to look at. Accompanied by music metal rock that was still playing on his smartphone. Every now and then he glanced at Hazel, who looked calm beside him. Her expression was flat, and it did not seem like the woman was bothered by the change in their relationship status. Was he the one who still wanted to reconcile with Hazel? Maybe yes. But he was not sure about Hazel's answer. Because after yesterday he turned down Hazel's offer to help him, she was acting, as usual, the next day. There was no sign that the woman averted him, or speaking while holding back from crying like yesterday.

To some extent, he felt Hazel was much more mature than him.

He immediately took his eyes off Hazel when Hazel turned to him, pretending he enjoyed his drink.

‘Raymond?’

‘Hm?’

‘Well… perhaps you don't want to, but…’

Raymond held back the urge to glance at Hazel to see her reaction when she said that. ‘Yes?’

‘If you have a person you like or interested in, can you please tell me? I'm going to do the same.’

He was suddenly disappointed at what Hazel said. He thought Hazel would ask him to reconcile, then their relationship would be back to normal. His thoughts were too naive. Looks like Hazel was no longer interested in him.

He nodded reluctantly. He put down the cup and inhaled deeply again. ‘I’ll tell you when the time comes.’

‘Great. I’ll be back first. The weather outside is cold,’ Hazel smiled awkwardly as she lifted the cup she was holding in her tiny hands a little. She went inside without even looking. Ah, he was wrong. The woman tried to act normal with him, not forgetting him already. He sighed, took out the cigarette smoke he had inhaled from his nostrils. In fact, if the woman asks for reconciliation, he will surely accept it happily.

His smartphone rang, stopping the music he was playing. He clicked the green button when he looked at Thyme Umberbridge on his smartphone screen then he brought his smartphone to his ear. ‘Yes?’

‘I know, I told you to take the days off. But I need your help now.’

Thyme's exasperated voice made him slightly wary. He immediately extinguished the cigarette he was smoking to the portable ashtray near him. ‘Is there any problem?’

‘Verdict…’

He froze. His blood rippled. Fear began to envelop him quickly.

Don't ... don't let bad things happen ...

‘What happened with Verdict? He's all right, right?’

‘That ... I don't know how to say.’

Did the bad scenario cross his mind actually happen? No, no, no. He could not bear to think about it. But if that was true, he wouldn't be able to forgive himself. ‘Tell me about the location. I'll be right there in a minute.’

***

Just the day before yesterday he chatted with Verdict. Seeing with his own eyes how Verdict suddenly became embarrassed when he saw Amanda. Awkward. Then he cursed him for deciding to move from Morozov to Cirillo without telling him.

‘Suit yourself, Brother Ray.’

And now, in front of him, Verdict was lying on a hospital bed, complete with a life support device that showed his slow but steady heartbeat. His condition was much worse than the last time he had seen. Verdict's eyes were closed as if he were sleeping quietly. Reminded him of Arnold. His panic attack began to control him. He was desperately trying to hide how panicked he was, trying to stay calm because he didn't want to worry Amanda and Thyme. He had to stay calm because he was the only adult they could count on—apart from Renault Umberbridge, of course, who was also standing beside Thyme.

‘Sorry, Brother Raymond. Because of me, Verdict—’

He immediately closed Amanda's lips before that girl continued her words while wiping the girl’s tears. ‘Verdict is strong. He had been in a worse situation than this before. Let's just hope he can pass his critical period.’

What he said was half true. Several years before that man became Walter’s leader, he got a serious injury that forced him to stay at the hospital for a month with a little hope to live, but Verdict was able to pass his critical period. Compared to that time, Verdict's current condition was much better. Moreover, the doctor who handled Verdict also said the same thing. But still, the doctor's affirmation could not get rid of his fear. What if his condition suddenly got worse, then that man would follow Arnold? Negative thoughts constantly gathered to haunt him.

‘Who attacked him?’

‘Simon Clive. As you might expect,’ said Lucas Abakumov—Verdict’s confidant whom he had known for a long time. The man who had Indonesian-Russian blood, with natural grey hair—which he got from his father's genes—that he slicked back, emphasizing his sharp jawline. His appearance was even more fierce because he always wore black clothes. Anyone who had just met Lucas would have been intimidated by his strong aura. Even though this person was only twenty years old. His mind was still innocent, so that Verdict often teased him. ‘They asked us to hand over Amanda. But Boss refused to do so. You know the rest.’

He glanced at Verdict, who was still asleep, then growled. ‘I have something to investigate. Please take care of them, Lucas.’

‘I understand.’

Raymond nodded, then walked out of the room. Then when he turned around, he was surprised to find Hazel in front of Verdict's room.

‘Hi,’

He frowned, not understanding how his ex could be at this place. He did not remember telling Hazel where he was going. Did this woman track him down, just like when he was in the clinic at that time?

‘Why are you here?’ he asked, surprised.

‘How is your friend’s condition?’

Instead of answering his question earlier, Hazel threw back his question. He was silent. Fear enveloped him when Hazel casually asked Verdict's condition as if she had known Arnold's adopted brother for a long time. Even though he had never introduced Hazel to Verdict because he only met Verdict after his relationship with Hazel ended. He tried to hide his surprise by staying calm so Hazel would not get suspicious.

‘Do you want to eat something?’

Hazel narrowed her eyes. ‘You have not answered my question.’

‘Why not? You also haven't answered my question earlier. So we are the same,’ Raymond replied sarcastically.

He strolled past Hazel, who was still standing where he was, not answering his question. Seeing Hazel's attitude earlier raised his guard. Just yesterday he was suspicious of Martha. Now he also had to suspect his ex-girlfriend? Now, who should he believe? It felt like everything was moving in the direction he did not want. Walking in a complicated direction, until it was difficult for him to remain clearheaded and neutral.

‘Raymond?’

He spun around, turned to face Hazel with a flat smile. His eyes caught Hazel's hand squeezing her bag, looking nervous for reasons he did not understand.

‘Where do you want to eat?’

‘You choose. I'll just go with it.’

He pulled out his smartphone, pretending to give Hazel a chance to think about which restaurant they were going to visit when he opened the tracker app on his smartphone. He was surprised to find that the tracking device he had secretly put on Hazel had not been detected anymore by his application. He looked back at Hazel who was also busy with her smartphone. Quickly he closed the application and stuffed his smartphone back into his coat pocket. Fear moved around him like a thin black mist and slowly choked him. He could no longer look at Hazel as a clumsy woman who always blushed whenever he was with her. In front of him, the woman now looked like a snake ready to bite him at any moment.

Please tell me everything I see is a lie, Hazel. Please.

His chest now felt tight.

‘Raymond, I found a good restaurant—’ Hazel paused as she looked at him. The woman immediately ran over to him. ‘Raymond? Are you alright?’

His lips trembled, but he nodded. ‘Yes.’

But you look pale. Are you feeling unwell?’

It felt like Hazel who was worried about him was still the same as the Hazel he had known. Was everything he was thinking about just an illusion? Could he still trust Hazel?

‘I'm just tired,’ he lied and managed to force himself to answer Hazel's question so she would not suspect his fear. ‘Did you got the place you want to eat?’

Hazel still looked worried. ‘But you don’t look well. Are you sure? We can—’

He did not know what urge he felt, he really did not know. His body moved on its own, touched Hazel's cheek with both hands, pulled her closer and kissed the tiny lips that he had not to get the opportunity to touch in a long time. He did not know why he did it. Maybe he wanted to confirm that all his guesses were wrong. Perhaps, deep inside his heart, he still wanted to trust Hazel.

The woman did not reject him at all. Instead, she returned the kiss until they both ran out of breath. He then moved his lips away from Hazel, found her melting after he kissed her. Once he realized, he immediately stepped back, away from Hazel while saying sorry several times.

Damn, even though he already agreed that they would become friends again. Why did he even violate it by kissing Hazel without asking her approval?

‘It's okay, Raymond. I can forget this kiss if that's what you want,’ Hazel rubbed her lips, then smiled at him. ‘Let’s just pretend it never happened. So, are you going to go now?’

***